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homunculus (3)
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Masturbating elephants for science

"One guy I know got a black eye from being hit by an elephant’s penis."
posted by homunculus on Mar 8, 2007 - 37 comments

...but size doesn't matter.

Penises visible from space.
posted by empath on Jan 31, 2007 - 29 comments

What's good for the goose.....

It's genital evolution day! Penis evolution. For my money, evolution reached it's zenith with the Argentine Lake Duck. Plenty more MeFi penis related shenanigans here , including the penis museum.
posted by lalochezia on Jan 23, 2007 - 31 comments

Urologist slices perfectly ok penis

Should have worked in a sushi bar. Newsoftheweirdfilter : before entering an hospital in order to have corrective surgery on your testicles, make sure your surgeon of choice isn't 1. slightly insane 2. short tempered 3.holding a scalpel (probably SFW, but may elicit a perpetual lack of trust in doctors).
posted by elpapacito on Jan 19, 2007 - 39 comments

The Penis is Bad, the Gun is Good.

The story, set in the distant future, involves a group of immortal intellectuals who lives isolated from an outside reality of unbridled savagery and brutality. No, I'm not talking about Metafilter, but Zardoz. The Penis is Bad, the Gun is Good. In the future the real threat isn’t Islamofascism or rogue Kryptonians, but bored immortals who dress like Belgians and can’t get it up. Did I mention Sean Connery in red S/M short shorts? You just can't make movies this wonderfully terrible anymore. (previously on MetaFilter, in the pre YouTube era, here)
posted by Meatbomb on Dec 5, 2006 - 61 comments

intimate

The BBC attaches cameras to the genitals of a man and woman. Sex ensues. NSFW Google video.
posted by four panels on Nov 25, 2006 - 153 comments

A truly blessed man

2 heads are better than 1 Ever heard of diphallus? Well, now you have. See here as well
posted by bmpetow on Aug 22, 2006 - 31 comments

Size Doesn't Matter... Size Doesn't Matter... Keep repeating...

I've long felt that the U.S. of A. "jumped the shark" as a country when we rejected the Metric System. The price of gasoline would still be under a dollar (per liter). Yet, we'd drive less because a short 20 mile trip would become a long 32 km trip. Then there's the most important measurement of all [maybe NSFW animated graph], providing us with the joy of 12.9(!) while we try to ignore that Japan is .1 ahead of us and France is .1 more than South Africa. (And is that Korean average North or South?)
posted by wendell on Aug 14, 2006 - 65 comments

As if you didn't already know

Rabbits eat poop. Gerbils have epilepsy. Pigs have corkscrew penises.
posted by 31d1 on Aug 5, 2006 - 22 comments

Fold carefully, grasshopper.

Kokigami: origami for Mr. Happy. (Not, not this. And not ninjas, either.) The sensuous practise of Kokigami originated from the ancient Japanese art form of giving beautifully wrapped gifts.
posted by gottabefunky on Jul 15, 2006 - 11 comments

A Tail By Any Other Name

A Tail By Any Other Name : Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert thinks it would be awfully handy to have an extra appendage. A Providence handyman sees things a little differently.
posted by grapefruitmoon on Jun 27, 2006 - 22 comments

Rate My Penis

Left wing Australian Blogger / TV writer Ms Fits receives some very interesting fan mail asking for advice. Definitely NSFW if the title didn't give that away. Ms Fits is known for her work as a writer on Neighbours, her short lived TV series Last Man Standing, her blog, and her long running arguments with right-wing columnist Andrew Bolt.
posted by jonathanstrange on May 31, 2006 - 16 comments

Men will be men

Sexual ornaments grow out of all proportion It seems that men will be men throughout the animal kindom, not just our little lonely corner of of it. Most body parts grow proportionally with the rest of the body as individuals of a species become larger, although scientists have long known that visual cues of reproductive prowess are a special case. But is this the case with everyone?
posted by pezdacanuck on May 23, 2006 - 41 comments

Scarred for life

How were you circumcised? A fascinating discussion of circumcision scar styles left by the different methods of circumcision. (NSFW, penis photos, slightly gruesome discussion of circumcision methods.)
posted by agropyron on Apr 19, 2006 - 165 comments

what a bunch of dicks

Swine penis. Swine Penis. Swine penis. Penis whine. Penis wine. [a little nsfw]
posted by jessamyn on Apr 15, 2006 - 49 comments

"WARNING: HORSE COCK"

The penis project. (NSFW) An art project by Sue Long. "At Long's house, penises are everywhere. Cluttering the bedroom floor, standing erect on bookshelves, sticking out of potted plants, sprinkled throughout her back yard. Everywhere you turn, a penis is staring at you." (via oink)
posted by madamjujujive on Apr 13, 2006 - 67 comments

the perfect penis ?

the perfect penis? (very NSFW) guy injects silicon into his groin for several years and ... well...
posted by vronsky on Mar 29, 2006 - 115 comments

A feeling of warmth, security and self-esteem.

Ever wish you weren't circumsized? (NSFW) The SenSlip is a very flexible garment for the penis. It is available in Caucasian Pink (mid-brown and dark brown colours will be available soon). Make sure you check out the video demo. [via]
posted by If I Had An Anus on Dec 19, 2005 - 154 comments

AAAAAAAAAAGH

Qigong is the ancient Chinese art of movement and breathing to increase energy, one of its grandmasters being Tu Jin-Sheng of the 99 Qigong. Qigong can be used to relieve stress and maintain good health. Or, if you're like Jin-Sheng, you can use it to tie a truck to your penis and pull it across a parking lot.
posted by XQUZYPHYR on Nov 30, 2005 - 16 comments

*** FREE PENIS ENLARGEMENT ***

Salon interview with Mike Salvini of Size Matters A look into a bizarre internet subculture of men who spend hundreds of hours doing exercises to get a bigger wang. Requires premium membership or day pass.
posted by sid on Jul 8, 2005 - 32 comments

No pain, no gain.

“Thank you for your recent E-mail. I appreciate your concern. However, I am, at this time, completely satisfied with the size of my penis.” Says a Gizmodo post: Now I consider myself fairly well versed in penis lengthening—a skill introduced to me, inadvertently, by my 6th grade math teacher—but I did not realize one could become a medical doctor and specialize in the topic. They also point to a similar device mentioned in an earlier post. Ow.
posted by spock on Jun 24, 2005 - 11 comments

Black Cycling Shorts

Dear cyclists: please wear black cyling shorts. TIA.
posted by brownpau on Jun 1, 2005 - 82 comments

girlzone!

This ain't your grandma's DIY crafting. (most links NSFW)
posted by heatherann on Apr 29, 2005 - 30 comments

I see your schwartz is as big as mine!

Vikings with ... issues. And for complete amusement, check the google ads on the right. Big swords, baby, big, really big.
posted by Wulfgar! on Feb 25, 2005 - 14 comments

Size -- and 'Erogenous Sensation' -- Matter

Micro-penis sufferers, rejoice!
posted by digaman on Dec 7, 2004 - 50 comments

Big Dick Cheney

Overexposed: Upon closer inspection, it seems the vice president’s smile was not his biggest, ahem, asset. Is that what we think it is?
posted by dogmatic on Nov 12, 2004 - 57 comments

Penis-Unicorns

Jeff's Magical World of Penis-Unicorns [warning: background midi (and unicorns with penises on their heads)]
posted by mr_crash_davis on Sep 16, 2004 - 13 comments

cock

Big Dick Lit : I guess this is not safe for work.
posted by angry modem on Sep 7, 2004 - 18 comments

The Man With the Smallest Penis in Existence and the Electron Microscope Technician Who Loved Him

The Man With the Smallest Penis in Existence and the Electron Microscope Technician Who Loved Him (flash cartoon)
posted by dydecker on Aug 27, 2004 - 11 comments

Willy-Nilly?

Coalition of the Willy. [via abuddha's memes]
Just as the eyes may be averted from full frontal public displays of male nudity, is it possible that the unconscious association to phallic symbols like "weapons of mass destruction" may effectively lead the eyes to be "averted", thus frustrating any search.
(NOTE: This essay isn't really 'logical,' but it's a fun ride anyway, pun intended)
posted by moonbird on Aug 7, 2004 - 8 comments

WWJDOYP?

Keep Your Jesus Off My Penis...mmm'kay? NSFW, by the way--this is not your father's folk-acoustic music.
posted by Sidhedevil on Jun 30, 2004 - 19 comments

But did he scream out his own name??

Go screw yourself! One man takes up the challenge. For...um...science and the betterment of something or other.
posted by jonmc on Mar 26, 2004 - 25 comments

Ridiculous Infomercial Review

Why won't Ron Jeremy say 'penis' on the air? This and many more important questions are pondered at the Ridiculous Infomercial Review. If you click in the next 20 minutes, you'll receive Matthew Lesko's wardrobe, absolutely free!!
posted by PrinceValium on Jan 27, 2004 - 6 comments

Same old cock and bull story

Just in time for Christmas! Shop for scrotums. Get yourself a bull penis walking stick. Spoil your dog with bull penis chew treats. (Go for the 24" ones, if only for the jealousy factor)
posted by mr_crash_davis on Nov 3, 2003 - 14 comments

Grow six inches overnight!

Ever wonder who would respond to penis-enlargement spam? Corporate CEOs, veterinarians and athletic coaches, to name a few.
posted by Oriole Adams on Aug 6, 2003 - 46 comments

Phallological Museum

The Icelanding Phallological Museum. A museum dedicated to the male sexual organ, with an online gallery of phalluses of many species.
Lingam Gnosis is the 'ancient art of penis reading' - like palmistry, only with penises, which can be classified into alchemical earth, fire, water and air types.
Foreskin.org is an educational site about the male foreskin (with photographs and articles).
(Needless to say, probably not suitable for work).
posted by plep on Jul 25, 2003 - 5 comments

Size matters?

You won't like me when I'm mad [Flash]. And you probably won't like me when I'm glad either. [via Just Orb]
posted by DBAPaul on Jul 8, 2003 - 9 comments

?

The story of Mister, uh, Big
Initially I was going to post about this with a tongue-in-cheek tone. But when I got to the end of the piece, I was disturbed to find that an act of child abuse - an act of what I see as an act of pedophilia - has been reported matter-of-factly by Rolling Stone, without so much as the blink of an eye. It's not the central part of the story, not the reason for telling it, but still. Why? is it because perhaps the perpetrator is a woman and it's not seen as a crime? Or is it her age? Am I making a mountain out of a molehill?

Warning - might not be safe for work, especially if the link offsite at the bottom of the page is working...
posted by tomcosgrave on Jun 4, 2003 - 72 comments

Penisblog!

Penisblog Ben Brown did it ages ago, staking out the avant-garde as usual. Now the meme gets its own site. Can you match the member to the bloggeur? (Extra credit for spinning the project into a discursion on openness and self-revelation online.) Not, as they say, work-safe.
posted by joeclark on Apr 16, 2003 - 64 comments

Tunnel of Love, Indeed

Sex in an MRI scanner shows that in the missionary position, the penis looks like a boomerang.
posted by agregoli on Apr 14, 2003 - 19 comments

Harvard Penis

Did you hear the one about the Harvard girls and the large snow phallus? Oh, and here's the response featuring the memorable line: "it means that we, as women, must be subject to erect penises whether we like it or not."
posted by adrober on Feb 23, 2003 - 114 comments

Cast members.

Cast Members. NSFW
posted by crunchland on Feb 17, 2003 - 11 comments

Girlzone Naughty Stuff

Tickling the ivories - uh-oh, bad girl post! This mpg video clip is just too darn fun not to share, but it is definitely nsfw, which is why I am posting it pre-Friday. But hear me, you will get fired if you open this at work! I mean it! just doing my bit to dispel the boyzone myth
posted by madamjujujive on Jan 23, 2003 - 65 comments

Dear Penis...

Dear Penis... Won't you come out to play? [A flash animation performed by Rodney Carrington and cartooned by Chris Dill.]
posted by Carlos Quevedo on Nov 4, 2002 - 18 comments

This news item turned out to be a hoax. Has Reuters been fooled again? I certainly smell a rat... (I know the original mefi link pointed to the BBC, but the BBC picked it up from Reuters)
posted by titboy on Oct 19, 2002 - 10 comments

Myth Dispelled: Shoe Size, Penis Size Not Linked.

Myth Dispelled: Shoe Size, Penis Size Not Linked. I guess there's no need in buying my shoes two sizes too large any longer (pardon the pun). Damn you scientists!
posted by pallid on Sep 30, 2002 - 22 comments

The Ideal Prepuce.

The Ideal Prepuce. Enter the posthe and the akroposthion.
posted by plexi on Sep 19, 2002 - 9 comments

Talking Cock,

Talking Cock, a humorous and sensitive look at the penis and the relationships men form with it, is starting to gain a lot of attention in the UK (now bring it to the States, dammit). Based on more than 3,000 responses to a still-online questionnaire, humorist Richard (Dick!) Herring has devised a one-man show that covers everything from Freudian nightmares to different cultural views of the penis, to the biscuit game. Oh, and the reader submitted penis poetry is a hoot. Warning: definitely average nearly nude male picture on the front page. May not be safe for work.
posted by WolfDaddy on Aug 6, 2002 - 20 comments

A Person Paper on Purity in Language.

A Person Paper on Purity in Language. An old William Satire (aka Douglas Hofstadter) piece that's well worth reading. "One of the more hilarious suggestions made by the squawkers for this point of view is to abandon the natural distinction along racial lines, and to replace it with a highly unnatural one along sexual lines. One such suggestion-emanating, no doubt, from the mind of a madwhite-would have us say 'he' for male whites (and blacks) and 'she' for female whites (and blacks). Can you imagine the outrage with which sensible folk of either sex would greet this 'modest proposal'?"
posted by jacobm on Jun 18, 2002 - 21 comments

Puppetry of the Penis: Tackle Happy (2001)

Puppetry of the Penis: Tackle Happy (2001) Any Australian Metafilterians care to explain this? I found a rave review of this DVD on Amazon.com's Future Bestseller's list. "Organ Origami", "The Fine Art of Genital Manipulation" and "Performances with Road Companies at Major Festivals Throughout The World"? I think the world's citizen's are owed an explanation.
posted by dgeiser13 on May 30, 2002 - 10 comments

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