MetaFilter posts tagged with rapture

as a thief in the night

plexi — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 13:42:21 -0800

You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind?
Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind.

Fake Rapture.

univac — Tue, 05 May 2009 11:26:14 -0800

Fake Rapture. You are now on the cutting edge.

Run from anything that stimulates youthful lust

KokuRyu — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 16:22:38 -0800

Christian Sex Retailing. Christian Sex Toy Retailing There's a new sexual revolution happening, and the people driving it are not exactly a bunch of free-love libertines. Many people probably think of evangelical Christians as being more preoccupied with denying the pleasures of the flesh. Christianity has always had a lot to say about sexuality. But attitudes are changing and new approaches to Christian sex are emerging. Dagmar Herzog was interviewed today on CBC's The Current (second segment, requires Flash Player), and, who says in a recent interview with Salon: For liberals, sex has become the problem that has no name; one simply does not hear liberals articulate a defense of sexual rights. Instead, what we have witnessed is a coalescing of conservative evangelical and mainstream secular perspectives on sex. The conversation on sex in America -- when sex is discussed in a serious and earnest way at all -- tends largely to adopt the parameters set by the Religious Right. Herzog's new book. A collection of print interviews with Herzog can be found here. Five years after Wilson gave birth to her first child, she and her husband, Kevin, wanted to spice up their nights in the boudoir, but did not want to go to a store and were offended by pornographic pop-ups on some online shops. To provide options suitable to their marriage bed, the two founded a website, which features everything from condoms to massage lotions to vibrators. The California couple’s favourite purchase? A pair of remote-control vibrating faux leather panties she wears out in public. “It’s fun and nobody else knows,” Preschern said. [previously]

You've Been Left Behind & I Nailed Your Wife

jonson — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 09:06:15 -0800

We all know The Rapture is coming soon (although "no one knows the day or hour"), and many of us will want to send out appropriate taunting messages from our heavenly perch to our loser buddies that didn't get chosen. At last, a service provider has arisen to serve this need. At You've Been Left Behind, you can store up to 250 MB of documents to be sent to up to 62 separate emails addresses in the event of the Rapture. Rapture is determined to have occurred when 3 of the 5 team members fail to log in to the site over a 3 day period.

The world wasn't destroyed after all. Sorry about that.

ardgedee — Tue, 01 Jan 2008 17:01:43 -0800

Mea maxima culpa

Pony Express for the Damned

Sfving — Tue, 26 Dec 2006 12:06:47 -0800

Write letters to your unsaved friends. When the rapture comes, this guy will mail them.

Is it time to get excited?

pandaharma — Fri, 14 Jul 2006 05:27:58 -0800

Is it time to get excited? Looking at the Rapture News, I'd say yes! However, the Rapture Index (previously) remains unchanged. For some, the timing is in doubt.

If you're reading this, then, well nevermind.

three blind mice — Tue, 06 Jun 2006 11:54:12 -0800

ON JUNE 6 2006 (6606) IF THE FIRST OF TWO RAPTURES HAS NOT HAPPENED AND ANTICHRIST HAS NOT DECLARED HIMSELF ON WORLD SIMULCAST TELEVISION, THEN I (PASTOR HARRY) WILL REVEAL THE TRUE NAME AND IDENTITY OF THE ANTICHRIST AT 11:05 PM EST ON THIS SITE AND ON DOOMSDAY TALK RADIO, OUR INTERNET RADIO BROADCAST.

Catholics are the New York Yankees of Christianity.

monju_bosatsu — Mon, 22 May 2006 08:35:40 -0800

The Interpretative Dance Theocrats. Inspired by Salon's excerpt from Michelle Goldberg's new book, Kingdom Coming: The Rise of Christian Nationalism, this handy guide will resolve your confusion over Christian theological jargon. [via]

OMeGa

brownpau — Wed, 01 Feb 2006 16:36:11 -0800

Interpreting Revelation's "Millenium." Outside of the all-too-virulent rapture-crazy pre-tribulational dispensationalist premillenialism permeating JesusLand, some Christians hold to other, more nuanced eschatological alternatives. You've got historic post-tribulational premillenialism, which places the transformation of the faithful at the final judgment rather than before it; amillenialism, which regards Christ's "millenial" reign as a symbolic spiritual reign culminating in the last judgment; and postmillenialism, which sees the millenium as a gradual progression towards goodness and light. Overlapping those, you have the "it's all been fulfilled" preterists, and their prophecy-party-pooping compatriots, the hyper-preterists. It's a debate just slightly more fun than the end of the universe. Meanwhile, the noncanonical apocalypses sit in a corner, sadly ignored, and sunny Megiddo is still waiting for some end times action.

...to help the Jewish people go home...

amberglow — Sun, 08 Jan 2006 08:54:09 -0800

Philo-Semitism: Just another form of Anti-Semitism? Interesting Wash Post article on Evangelicals turning away from supersessionism -- the centuries-old belief that with the coming of Jesus, God ended his covenant with the Jews and transferred it to the Christian church, and the concerns it is raising. ..."That hope is felt and expressed by Christians as a kind, benevolent hope," ... "But believing that someday Jews will stop being Jews and become Christians is still a form of hoping that someday there will be no more Jews." ... Is it that philosemitism is just as dehumanizing as antisemitism and, because it masquerades as its opposite, more insidious, or just the most recent manifestation of the longstanding appropriation of us Jews as symbols, whether it helps or hurts us?

who will send this

svenvog — Wed, 28 Sep 2005 16:13:54 -0800

Who will send this -er- Apology letter to us- um left belowers if all the predispensationalist and milleniest fundies are raptured? via the awesome growabrain

An amalgamation appropos of nothing

DeepFriedTwinkies — Sat, 09 Apr 2005 17:06:24 -0800

Saturday night and nothing to do? No worries, just kick back your heels, have a glass of wine, and Tesh your cares away.

The Apocalypse Will Be Televised

iamck — Fri, 11 Mar 2005 08:39:14 -0800

Indeed, all over the world, millions of born-again Christians have vanished into the mystical ether--leaving behind their clothing, their eyeglasses, even their dentures--along with every child under the age of twelve. Airplanes are crashing, automobiles are veering driverless and out of control, and fetuses are disappearing from their mothers' wombs, as the born-again and the unborn alike are abruptly "raptured" to heaven. Harper's Magazine reviewer Gene Lyons discusses apocalyptic entertainment.

That's not the rapture, it's the space people harvesting you for meat

jimray — Wed, 08 Dec 2004 21:32:18 -0800

Republican environmental politics as usual? While the president's policies seem to be standard for his party, Bill Moyers thinks there's more than meets the eye. On receiving Harvard medical school's Global Environment Citizen Award, Moyers posits that destruction of the environment isn't just good for big business, it's a self fulfilling prophecy of the apocalypse. Not just any old apocalypse, it's The Rapture, complete with plagues for the non-believers and immmediate ascension to the right hand of God Himself for the righteous.

Two days after Moyer's speech, Science magazine looks at the scientific consensus on global warming. If you're having a hard time explaining all this to your kids, don't worry, your tax dollars are hard at work.

Their early stuff was better.

drezdn — Tue, 05 Oct 2004 16:56:29 -0800

Heavy prophetic activity... The rapture index- cliffs notes for doomsday.

flash rapture

giantkicks — Fri, 31 Oct 2003 20:33:17 -0800

Blondie's Rapture, a heartfelt cover of it by My Robot Friend. -another Flash link...

RaptureLetters

adamms222 — Thu, 05 Dec 2002 06:01:41 -0800

RaptureLetters sends an email to your unsaved friends, after the Rapture, explaining where your good soul has disappeared to. I suppose this means that they only employ sinners, in order to ensure that someone remains behind to operate the site...

Coop — Fri, 20 Sep 2002 10:57:09 -0800

The Rapture Index This rather bizarre site is the Dow Jones of the end of the world. From the site, "You could say the Rapture index is a Dow Jones Industrial Average of end time activity, but I think it would be better if you viewed it as prophetic speedometer. The higher the number, the faster we're moving towards the occurrence of pre-tribulation rapture. " Whacked...

Settle — Thu, 04 Apr 2002 20:18:48 -0800

A Refreshing Change of Pace for everyone with an opinion about Isreal/Palestine. The Middle East Conflict - Has it Been Engineered by Extremist Rightwing Christians and Zionists Hoping to "Force" the "Rapture"? Sounds crazy, looks crazy...but the suggestions are not made on the basis of paranoia alone, unfortunately. The fact that the Americans involved are very religious (and Isreal being the location of a few scheduled divine appearances) is an obviously important but consistantly avoided side of this pile of conflict. So how crazy is this article? Isn't it just a bit naïve to think this is just a big property argument with some jewish/muslim tension thrown in? Hey, as long as we can't decide whether Arafat or Sharon is worse than the other, we may as well discuss something else in the meantime...or discuss something totally unrelated in this thread, for a refreshing change of pace. (From the reputable, extensive and fascinating news website, unknownnews.net)

machaus — Tue, 05 Mar 2002 19:37:04 -0800

Noah's Ark is being rebuilt, but I don't think it will float. I can't help but think that it would make a wicked skateboard halfpipe. The project broke ground in 1976, but seems to be moving slowly. More info here and here. Any Maryland MeFi'ers know the current status of this thing? more inside:

waxpancake — Fri, 21 Sep 2001 15:43:47 -0800

The Rapture Ready index is a numerical assessment of signs that indicate the end times are here. Maintained by USAF supply sergeant Todd Strandberg, he says the Index isn't meant to show when the Rapture will come, but how quickly we are moving towards it. It's a speedometer; not a clock. (More inside.)

atfrost — Tue, 28 Aug 2001 08:02:05 -0800

What do you get when you mix a zealous Christian, 12 blow-up dolls, and a toga party? It's just too strange, but it might have been the rapture for one woman...

Steven Den Beste — Wed, 13 Dec 2000 10:45:28 -0800

MP3: it's not just for music anymore! [See inside]

philip — Mon, 10 Apr 2000 06:07:15 -0800

The Rapture Index "by no means is meant to predict the rapture, however, the index is meant to measure the type of activity that could act as a precursor to the rapture." It tracks such data as unemployment, inflation, false Christs and, of course, plagues.