CRUD CRUD, brief reviews from a thrift store record collection. Also, Gibble Gabble, spoken-word record reviews, from the same collector.
posted on Jun 8, 2007 - View this thread

Pre-marital sex! Eastern religious influences! Nods to Darwinian evolution! Spitefulness! In a world where rock music is poised to corrupt the souls of young America, the music review section of Plugged In Online (developed by Focus on the Family) promises to evaluate music not by melody, rhythm, beat or sound, but by the spirit of Colossians 2:8: "See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ."
posted on Sep 18, 2006 - View this thread

Christmas carols reviewed It's that time of year again for the Christmas Abstract: a music reviewer casts his ear upon tunes of the season. Mostly acerbic, but still interesting. Even includes dialog between Jesus and the Pottery Barn music director.
posted on Dec 7, 2005 - View this thread

"First, look up the most popular and critically-acclaimed books, movies, and music on Amazon. Click on 'Customer Reviews,' and sort them by 'Lowest Rating First'..." The Amazon.com Knee-Jerk Contrarian Game.
posted on Jul 2, 2004 - View this thread

Workers Rejoice!! The Maoist Internationalist Movement's music Reviews are in for 2003! As much as Lopez would like to pretend it is otherwise, social status and wealth are inextricably linked in capitalist society. Poor misguided J-Lo.
posted on Dec 19, 2003 - View this thread

"Right away you can tell: it's white people." Music reviews by 5th graders and kindergartners. via Slatch.
posted on Nov 13, 2003 - View this thread

The director, actor and self proclaimed messiah, Vincent Gallo, has released an album. As The Guardian describes: "It's proggy, inept, embarrassing and pretentious. In fact, it's terrible." Can anyone else think of actors and musicians, writers and artists who shouldn't give up their day job. Extra points available for any who shouldn't even be doing their day job.
posted on Sep 21, 2001 - View this thread

Nick Hornby reviews the Billboard Top Ten. Quote: We have been told often enough that to disapprove of gangsta rap is pointless, middle class, and smug, like disapproving of modern urban life itself. Nevertheless, one is entitled to feel queasy about the enthusiasm for and endorsement of the gangsta life audible on "The Saga Continues . . ."
posted on Aug 21, 2001 - View this thread

Has there ever been a classical music review this damning? "It's difficult to tell how good they are. If they played a wrong note or lost the rhythm, no one but the composer would notice. Music is dead, and here is the corpse, embalmed on two slices of plastic hell. "
posted on Jul 8, 2001 - View this thread

A friend gave me a promo CD of a band called Len. It's the weirdest mix of hip-hop, rock, old-school rap, and bubble-gum pop. It's strange, yet also the most satisfying thing I've heard in a while. If you read the reviews at Amazon, you can see that some people can accept multi-genre bands, and others can't.
posted on Sep 14, 1999 - View this thread