6 posts tagged with samanthairby.
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there's freedom in covering your body with nonsense

i'm not hiding anymore, fam. some asshole at a reading a couple years ago was like, "lol japanese wave tattoo!?" and for a split second i felt stupid and almost apologetic but wait: HELLO, SON. I AM OLD. and while i hope that tiny hipster mustache etched permanently into the side of your finger remains au courant forever, i'm smart enough to know it won't and that you better start thinking up the cutesy story to explain it away at parties now. because in ten years when 3D face tattoos are the wave and the girls you're trying to bone are all, "ew...mustache?" you're going to feel this exact same shame and hopefully by that point my aquarius constellation tattoo and i will be cackling up at you from the ninth circle of hell. [more inside]
posted by amnesia and magnets on Oct 16, 2016 - 56 comments

" like arguing over who gets to fistfight a possum inside a dumpster"

an open letter to my nieces, who are currently fighting over a dude.
posted by the man of twists and turns on May 24, 2016 - 46 comments

FUCK ME I MADE PLANS TONIGHT

this is what happens when i stay up 5 hours and 13 minutes past my bedtime [from bitches gotta eat]
posted by desjardins on Feb 6, 2016 - 87 comments

makeup tutorials are like fucking hypnosis, man

spring beauty tips for the gross and apprehensive. [more inside]
posted by the man of twists and turns on May 13, 2015 - 17 comments

this is the gayest of all the possible things: going to a meshell ndegeocello concert, with a goddamned lesbian, that is being held in a motherfucking FOLK MUSIC SCHOOL.

how do you know if you're on a date with a lesbian or if you're just two pretty girls hanging out?
posted by the man of twists and turns on Nov 30, 2012 - 249 comments

'A childhood that began with a sort of cautious optimism quickly devolved into absolute horse shit.'

My mother became my daughter when I was nine years old. [more inside]
posted by the man of twists and turns on Jun 20, 2012 - 62 comments

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