You have to have some manners, baby can't you see?
June 1, 2011 9:19 PM Subscribe
Telephone Manners For Kids (SLYT WTF)
Back when I was in 6th grade, I needed a blank tape to record my oral homework for Spanish class. My mom told me to grab one out of "the drawer," so I did. I recorded my homework and turned it in.
A few days later, when passing back the homework, my Spanish teacher leaned in and told me I needed to go home that night and play the B side for my mom.
The tape's B side contained my mom's, rapping the Bill of Rights in the most embarrassing white-lady way possible. It was left over from her old school stuff (she's a teacher, you see) from the early 80s. She "wanted to reach the kids, and break the Constitution down for them in a way they could understand."
I think she could give blondie here a few pointers.
posted by phunniemee at 9:35 PM on June 1, 2011 [15 favorites]
A few days later, when passing back the homework, my Spanish teacher leaned in and told me I needed to go home that night and play the B side for my mom.
The tape's B side contained my mom's, rapping the Bill of Rights in the most embarrassing white-lady way possible. It was left over from her old school stuff (she's a teacher, you see) from the early 80s. She "wanted to reach the kids, and break the Constitution down for them in a way they could understand."
I think she could give blondie here a few pointers.
posted by phunniemee at 9:35 PM on June 1, 2011 [15 favorites]
Not sure, but I think the other girl is Sweetums.
posted by The Hamms Bear at 9:36 PM on June 1, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by The Hamms Bear at 9:36 PM on June 1, 2011 [2 favorites]
phunniemee PLEASE tell us that you still have that tape
posted by DoctorFedora at 10:32 PM on June 1, 2011
posted by DoctorFedora at 10:32 PM on June 1, 2011
OH no! Is this a real thing, or a clever post modern take on the past? I have a clever comment for either scenario, but I am not sure witch to use, as i do not wish to appear foolish.
posted by St. Sorryass at 11:18 PM on June 1, 2011
posted by St. Sorryass at 11:18 PM on June 1, 2011
*which.
and I think either punchline would just reference Tim and Eric, and be a terrible punchline.
But then a star wipe.
posted by St. Sorryass at 11:21 PM on June 1, 2011
and I think either punchline would just reference Tim and Eric, and be a terrible punchline.
But then a star wipe.
posted by St. Sorryass at 11:21 PM on June 1, 2011
My high school got a big grant from some electronics company one year, and decided rather than spending it on anything particularly useful, to buy a "state of the art" video-editing setup. This cunning plan, however, didn't involve hiring anyone who knew much of anything about doing video editing.
But it did mean that we ended up with a Video Toaster -- the original Amiga-based one -- and very little oversight.
Our best video was a hundred times worse than this one; the best were basically just demo reels for the Toaster's transition effects.
I have no doubt that someday, someone is going to come across a cache of those tapes and be certain that they have discovered why school drug testing became so popular in the early 90s.
posted by Kadin2048 at 12:26 AM on June 2, 2011
But it did mean that we ended up with a Video Toaster -- the original Amiga-based one -- and very little oversight.
Our best video was a hundred times worse than this one; the best were basically just demo reels for the Toaster's transition effects.
I have no doubt that someday, someone is going to come across a cache of those tapes and be certain that they have discovered why school drug testing became so popular in the early 90s.
posted by Kadin2048 at 12:26 AM on June 2, 2011
Until only recently I thought New Mexico was something made up.
posted by oxford blue at 12:43 AM on June 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by oxford blue at 12:43 AM on June 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
I go by the telephone museum, like, all the time. I have never gone in.
I guess maybe I should?
posted by NoraReed at 1:34 AM on June 2, 2011
I guess maybe I should?
posted by NoraReed at 1:34 AM on June 2, 2011
Whoops, I accidentally invented the phone!
posted by the bricabrac man at 4:42 AM on June 2, 2011
posted by the bricabrac man at 4:42 AM on June 2, 2011
This is why I have no interest in time travel. Who wants to go back to that?!
posted by chavenet at 4:42 AM on June 2, 2011
posted by chavenet at 4:42 AM on June 2, 2011
phunniemee PLEASE tell us that you still have that tape
Alas. My brother and I had a little too much fun playing the laugh-hysterically-at-mom game, and she took the tape and squirreled it away someplace in a well-hidden box of shame. Maybe I'll come across it years from now, and get to be embarrassed for her all over again.
posted by phunniemee at 6:40 AM on June 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
Alas. My brother and I had a little too much fun playing the laugh-hysterically-at-mom game, and she took the tape and squirreled it away someplace in a well-hidden box of shame. Maybe I'll come across it years from now, and get to be embarrassed for her all over again.
posted by phunniemee at 6:40 AM on June 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
I'm with item on this one; I'd much rather have seen this in its original form. It would have retained much more of its time-warp-iness. "Recontextualized," or whatever, this just feels forced.
posted by not_on_display at 9:27 AM on June 2, 2011
posted by not_on_display at 9:27 AM on June 2, 2011
item: "My god, I love Everything Is Terrible.
I don't. The hatchet jobs they do to their videos is awful. How about letting the viewer decide what the interesting parts are?"
I'm glad they are the curators of this dreck, there's no fucking way anyone would watch any of this if it wasn't cropped to the best parts. Otherwise it'd just be the equivalent of a VHS Prelinger Collection.
posted by wcfields at 10:02 AM on June 2, 2011 [2 favorites]
I don't. The hatchet jobs they do to their videos is awful. How about letting the viewer decide what the interesting parts are?"
I'm glad they are the curators of this dreck, there's no fucking way anyone would watch any of this if it wasn't cropped to the best parts. Otherwise it'd just be the equivalent of a VHS Prelinger Collection.
posted by wcfields at 10:02 AM on June 2, 2011 [2 favorites]
I don't. The hatchet jobs they do to their videos is awful. How about letting the viewer decide what the interesting parts are?
You were really going to watch half an hour of this? That's what Zoomba videos and The Home Shopping Network are for.
posted by cmoj at 10:20 AM on June 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
You were really going to watch half an hour of this? That's what Zoomba videos and The Home Shopping Network are for.
posted by cmoj at 10:20 AM on June 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
And once again I am reminded that the pain of my vasectomy was totally worthwhile.
posted by Decani at 10:53 AM on June 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by Decani at 10:53 AM on June 2, 2011 [1 favorite]
I like the part where the girl says "The telephone was invented by a man" and appears to gesture towards her friend, who is also a young girl.
posted by owtytrof at 11:14 AM on June 2, 2011
posted by owtytrof at 11:14 AM on June 2, 2011
I had to put on my glasses to make sure this wasn't Tim and Eric.
Lolz aside for a second, I wish there *was* a decent YouTube for kids' telephone etiquette.
You don't have to identify yourself or ask to speak to someone when you say hi on Skype or IM...but if the other person's cell phone has a cord and is attached to their wall? Sometimes, you do!
posted by gnomeloaf at 1:54 PM on June 2, 2011
Lolz aside for a second, I wish there *was* a decent YouTube for kids' telephone etiquette.
You don't have to identify yourself or ask to speak to someone when you say hi on Skype or IM...but if the other person's cell phone has a cord and is attached to their wall? Sometimes, you do!
posted by gnomeloaf at 1:54 PM on June 2, 2011
« Older Baaa | One more thing . . . Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by Navelgazer at 9:23 PM on June 1, 2011