Never mess with a ninja librarian -- they'll correct you within an inch of your life

November 11, 2011 3:20 PM

After an AP exclusive report on how the CIA is using "ninja librarians" to comb through internet postings and social media, NPR's Robert Siegel interviewed reporter Kimberly Dozier about her research for the article. This prompted enough listener response that All Things Considered had to revisit the phrase in their Letters segment today, with clarification about what kind of degree a ninja librarian may have earned.
posted by hippybear (37 comments total)

The most successful open source analysts, Naquin said, are something like the heroine of the crime novel "The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo," a quirky, irreverent computer hacker who "knows how to find stuff other people don't know exists."

This is totally like me.

But for porn.
posted by R. Schlock at 3:25 PM on November 11, 2011 [17 favorites]

"I would found an institution where any person can find instruction in any study."

Okay, Ezra. How about ... "Ninja Librarian?"
posted by ZenMasterThis at 3:25 PM on November 11, 2011

I just spammed the sils-masters mailing list at UNC Chapel Hill with this, and I feel very good about it.
posted by tarheelcoxn at 3:28 PM on November 11, 2011 [1 favorite]

(wonders nervously where jessamyn is)
posted by Trurl at 3:31 PM on November 11, 2011 [9 favorites]

We're all nervous. Was she dressed all in black last you saw her?
posted by hippybear at 3:32 PM on November 11, 2011

tarheelcoxn, your message clearly never got past the moderator.
posted by nonreflectiveobject at 3:33 PM on November 11, 2011

When ninja jessamyn comes for you the only thing you'll see is her star.
posted by villanelles at dawn at 3:36 PM on November 11, 2011 [30 favorites]

jessamyn is all over this thread.

What do you mean you can't see her?
posted by Ayn Rand and God at 3:39 PM on November 11, 2011 [1 favorite]

Hurm. I had forgotten that that's the moderated one, nonreflectiveobject, and am now weighing the cost/benefit of re-subscribing to sils-students. Ugh. With any luck Lara will like it and pass it on. :)
posted by tarheelcoxn at 3:45 PM on November 11, 2011 [1 favorite]

I'm Jessamyn.

HAICHIBA!
posted by Bunny Ultramod at 3:46 PM on November 11, 2011

Ninja Parade Slips Through Town Unnoticed.
posted by schmod at 4:06 PM on November 11, 2011 [6 favorites]

more and more the internet is looking like less of a "tool" and more of a "natural disaster"
posted by This, of course, alludes to you at 4:07 PM on November 11, 2011

(not because of the content but because of the ease of controlling and analysing it)
posted by This, of course, alludes to you at 4:09 PM on November 11, 2011

Silly people. Jessamyn is the essence of nonduality. Together, we constitute Jessamyn. Wherever three or more Mefites or librarians meet, there is Jessamyn.
posted by 1000monkeys at 4:09 PM on November 11, 2011

So... jessamyn is the Holy Spirit of MetaFilter.

"There she is, in the midst of you"
posted by hippybear at 4:17 PM on November 11, 2011 [2 favorites]

If the CIA is using ninjas, they're a whole lot cooler than I had thought.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 4:37 PM on November 11, 2011

Ninja librarians are neither ninjas nor librarians. Discuss.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 4:43 PM on November 11, 2011

Ninjarians, if you will. Or perhaps libringas.
posted by Salvor Hardin at 4:51 PM on November 11, 2011 [4 favorites]

If the CIA is using librarians, they're a whole lot cooler than I had thought.
posted by kitarra at 4:52 PM on November 11, 2011 [5 favorites]

That's quite an appropriation of the term 'open source'.

If I ran such an organization I would make sure never to actually point out what it does or even generally how it functions. Now all it takes is a few botnets to start firing tweets in a particular language to skew the conversation any way desired. I've no doubt their approach is sophisticated, but presumably if you keep messing with the signal to noise ratio, one strand of the data can become worthless.
posted by a womble is an active kind of sloth at 4:52 PM on November 11, 2011

I was listening to this in the car, and when the reporter got to the 'Masters of Librarian Science' part I did a double take and then thought of these guys.
posted by carter at 5:02 PM on November 11, 2011

There was a bad kung-fu movie on tv last week which was redeemed by the line "My ninjas will take care of this".

I want to run this division so I get to use this line on a regular basis.
posted by arcticseal at 5:58 PM on November 11, 2011

Judging from my conversations with librarians, I would say "ninja librarian" is redundant.

They have... powers.
posted by louche mustachio at 6:10 PM on November 11, 2011 [2 favorites]

I'd like to think Obama has the CIA's ninja librarians prepare a morning brief to keep him up to date on their progress in determining how people got those cats wedged into their scanners and why.
posted by Salvor Hardin at 6:35 PM on November 11, 2011 [2 favorites]

The CIA came recruiting at my iSchool recently. I did not submit an application.
posted by codacorolla at 7:01 PM on November 11, 2011

Siegel is adorable in that "letters segment" clip.
"They will correct you within an inch of your life.."
posted by obscurator at 7:52 PM on November 11, 2011

In the school library where I volunteer, after several inappropriate appropriations of library office supplies by teachers, I posted a warning on some of the supply boxes that reads:

THOSE WHO FAIL TO RETURN SUPPLIES MAY BE PURSUED BY LIBRARY NINJAS.

Now I can totally persuade the kids that ninja librarians actually exist! Yay, NPR.
posted by BlueJae at 7:59 PM on November 11, 2011

Open source in this context is not like the tech meaning - it means like unclassifed, classifed, top secret source material.
posted by k8t at 9:14 PM on November 11, 2011 [1 favorite]

US court verdict 'huge blow' to privacy, says fomer WikiLeaks aide: Decision made to open Twitter account of Icelandic MP Birgitta Jonsdottir, who is taking the case to the Council of Europe
posted by homunculus at 9:40 PM on November 11, 2011

Open Source = Unclassified, publicly available data
posted by Emperor SnooKloze at 11:47 PM on November 11, 2011 [1 favorite]

So this is why I can't find any library jobs! They are too stealthy to appear on the job boards! Yeah, that's the ticket...


(Actually, I have a library job interview next week. Now I know what to wear.)
posted by Biblio at 5:54 AM on November 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Now I want to create a sockpuppet account named Frodlio and pretend to be Biblio's nephew.
posted by hippybear at 6:47 AM on November 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

i wonder why they are giving a journalist access to write an article about it now.
posted by cupcake1337 at 8:07 PM on November 12, 2011

If the CIA is using librarians, they're a whole lot cooler than I had thought.

A friend of mine is a librarian (with degree) who works as a CIA analyst. I have been bugging her to find a job for me. Sadly, I have learned that I probably cannot get TS clearance, not because of any salacious activity, but because I have downloaded TV shows via bittorrent.
posted by cereselle at 3:15 PM on November 14, 2011

Hey nonreflectiveobject: looks like my post made it through this morning.
posted by tarheelcoxn at 8:27 AM on November 15, 2011

I saw it, coxn; it brought me here. Thanks for putting the word out, but remember, the byword is "stealth": next time, ixnay on the etafilter-May.
posted by GrammarMoses at 10:49 AM on November 15, 2011

BTW, for any Triangle locals who might be interested: Our Jessamyn will be speaking at SILS this Friday.
posted by GrammarMoses at 10:50 AM on November 15, 2011