Before The Movie Begins
February 2, 2012 1:32 PM   Subscribe

Published in the New Yorker and FPPed at Metafilter in the same week!

I don't want to oversell it, but I believe this makes me the most significant literary figure in the history of mankind.
posted by yankeefog at 1:46 PM on February 2, 2012 [10 favorites]

Awesome. Now do let's all go to the lobby!
posted by mannequito at 1:47 PM on February 2, 2012

Very nice. Your little box-checking routine actually managed to confuse me, something authors rarely manage to do when they try to write a "here are confusing terms and conditions" parody.
posted by Rock Steady at 1:52 PM on February 2, 2012 [2 favorites]

You have arrived! Here is your complimentary tie and monocle, Jacob. Mazeltov!
posted by OnTheLastCastle at 1:57 PM on February 2, 2012

This is awesome boffo.
posted by shakespeherian at 2:06 PM on February 2, 2012

congratulations, yankeefog, next you can expect to be sued by the MPAA for unauthorized use of its trademarks, "M.P.A.A.", "public exhibition", "strictly forbidden" and "baseball-bat-weilding ushers" (although that last one may be less a trademark and more a Trade Secret).
posted by oneswellfoop at 2:31 PM on February 2, 2012

Hah! I read that earlier this week and thought, "That's more clever than I would have expected from The New Yorker." Not that I don't love The New Yorker, because I do. But this was just especially good, and pointed, while fitting well within the house style.
posted by Joey Bagels at 2:47 PM on February 2, 2012

Thanks, guys! Glad you enjoyed it.

Rock Steady: You're not the only one. When I wrote it, I worked it out like a logic puzzle so that there actually was a correct sequence of boxes to check in order to opt out. But reading it again, I realized I had forgotten the solution, and now I can't remember it.
posted by yankeefog at 7:13 AM on February 4, 2012 [2 favorites]

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