Unhappy with the shape of your bottom?
October 10, 2001 8:35 AM   Subscribe

Unhappy with the shape of your bottom?
No problem, get yourself a wonderbum, a new product that "lifts, separates and shapes"
posted by twistedonion (9 comments total)
 
Prepare yourself for the onslaught of "ass" puns.
posted by ColdChef at 8:38 AM on October 10, 2001


There is no mention of wonderbums for men. Can someone get on that?
posted by scotty at 8:39 AM on October 10, 2001


Jeez, it's a butt-bra. Next up: Foot-binding makes a stunning return.
posted by schmedeman at 8:58 AM on October 10, 2001


Can someone get on that?

I'm on it, comrade.
posted by swift at 8:59 AM on October 10, 2001


they may be tights Swift, but do they help separate :-)
posted by twistedonion at 9:05 AM on October 10, 2001


You'd think that the fashion industry had already run out of things to "lift and separate" already, sheesh. What next? The cleft on your chin? Toe cleavege? Camel toes?

The fashion industry thrives on making women (and men) think they are not good enough as they are, and then it panders to our insecurities as such with ridiculous products as these to "help" remedy our collective ugliness. On the up side (heh), perhaps these Wonderbums might actually spare some people from going under the knife/lipo in the name of beauty.
posted by mosspink at 9:05 AM on October 10, 2001


Uh, they may want to work on their Google ranking...
posted by GernBlandston at 9:25 AM on October 10, 2001


honey,

lately, i've been unhappy with the shape of your bottom. i have been racking my brain over how to tell you without seeming insensitive, let alone what i might propose as a solution.

honey, after seeing an advertisement for the new WonderBum™, i just couldn't wait anymore.

the WonderBum™ is a fabulous new invention that takes your saggy, frumpy behind and gives it the kind of makeover that $500 dollars could not at a french beauty salon. the marvelous WonderBum™ lifts your buttocks like a psalm lifts your spirits; it separates your buttocks, to ensure proper form; it massages you in ways you've never felt before!

sweetie, i know that sometimes you miss the days you spent in college; you and i both do. the WonderBum™ allows us to recapture some of that magic.

don't do it for me, honey — wear the WonderBum™ for us!
posted by moz at 1:48 PM on October 10, 2001


I don't think that the model needed a wonderbum. Her bum seems pretty wonderful by itself.
posted by houndyboy at 3:47 AM on October 12, 2001


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