How To Act Human

May 15, 2012 3:36 PM

Inside the Actors Studio's James Lipton offers advice to Mitt Romney.
posted by gman (78 comments total)

Smile with your eyes Mitt.
posted by The Whelk at 3:46 PM on May 15, 2012 [6 favorites]

Lipton's written piece on Romney is available here.
posted by gman at 3:47 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

... And your mouth. At the same time.

That's really the trick of smiling (and laughing), the coordination of the whole face.
posted by filthy light thief at 3:47 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

Don't try to smize, it'll just be creepy.
posted by filthy light thief at 3:48 PM on May 15, 2012 [3 favorites]

"My wife owns a couple of humans, actually."
posted by Bathtub Bobsled at 3:48 PM on May 15, 2012 [22 favorites]

"But they're a pain to taken on vacation. They just sat there, whining and shitting, the whole trip. I'm sorry, my humans, there wasn't any room in the car for you. You had to go on the roof."
posted by filthy light thief at 3:51 PM on May 15, 2012 [6 favorites]

i'll say this about mitt romney: he's no charles nelson reilly.
posted by entropicamericana at 3:53 PM on May 15, 2012 [16 favorites]

The first time I saw "There Will Be Blood" I laughed because I thought Daniel Plainview's forced good cheer, so detached from his weirdo capitalist soul, reminded me of Romney.
posted by steinsaltz at 3:54 PM on May 15, 2012 [8 favorites]

"We should be woo'd and were not made to woo."
posted by Palquito at 3:55 PM on May 15, 2012 [1 favorite]

Best way to act human is to be human.


..so he's kind of screwed there.
posted by lumpenprole at 3:59 PM on May 15, 2012 [7 favorites]

This was completely hilarious in the way that only genuine advice can be.

Talking about the craft of acting always brings to mind Kevin Murphy heckling bad actors on MST3K:
"He studied under Stanislavski. . .'s car."
"He's been reading 'An Actor Prepares . . . to Suck.'"
posted by Countess Elena at 4:00 PM on May 15, 2012 [13 favorites]

WHO LET THE DOGS OUT ahahaha M I DOUBLE TIZZY hahahahah.

Oh, panderers, so ... pandery.
posted by resurrexit at 4:02 PM on May 15, 2012

Cognitive dissonance: watching this clip while imagining Lipton's voice as Monty Burns's.
posted by not_on_display at 4:05 PM on May 15, 2012 [1 favorite]

I can't figure out how serious that video is.
posted by andoatnp at 4:05 PM on May 15, 2012 [1 favorite]

AskMetafilter: Where can I train to master the art of completely destroying my enemies by offering genuine, sincere, heartfelt legitimate advice?

Thank you and bless your soul,
Ayn Rand [God is on vacation]
posted by Ayn Rand and God at 4:09 PM on May 15, 2012 [8 favorites]

People have probably already seen the Mitt Romney/Gul Dukat comparison.

Totally unfair. Dukat comes across as way more human.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 4:25 PM on May 15, 2012 [10 favorites]

(My G-d! Who cut that Lipton video? Lipton was playing to Camera #1, yet they kept cutting to the 2nd camera! Arrrghhh....!!!)
posted by vhsiv at 4:48 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

He's read Uta Hagen's Respect For Acting ....like an idiot.
posted by The Whelk at 4:51 PM on May 15, 2012 [3 favorites]

I was expecting the entire thing to be full-on snark, but it seems well-intentioned

That's one reason why it's funny.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:54 PM on May 15, 2012 [3 favorites]

Not to stereotype or judge, but I wonder how many of Mitt's odd mannerisms are a result of his Mormon upbringing. It's a fairly insular community, and he reminds me a lot of the group of (perfectly nice) Mormons that I hung out with in High School. Their social interactions always seemed a bit foreign and unfamiliar to me; they'd deliver the punch line of a joke half a beat too early, or laugh at the wrong part of another joke. Other times, they'd convey fake-seeming emotions that they assured me were genuine (and I had no reason to doubt that).

Again, there's nothing necessarily wrong with any of this. However, I think that a lot of Romney's perceived "oddness" may come from the fact that he comes from an American subculture that many of us are unfamiliar with, and might actually have very little to do with his wealth.
posted by schmod at 5:16 PM on May 15, 2012 [9 favorites]

Also, my life's ambition is to be James Lipton. Fucker is 85 years old! 85! It's like he drank Dick Clark's blood or something!
posted by Naberius at 5:17 PM on May 15, 2012 [3 favorites]

vhsiv: "(My G-d! Who cut that Lipton video? Lipton was playing to Camera #1, yet they kept cutting to the 2nd camera! Arrrghhh....!!!)"

Given the high production values of Comedy Central's officially-sanctioned incarnation of Between Two Ferns, I suspect that the two shows swapped crews.
posted by schmod at 5:18 PM on May 15, 2012

jcreigh: "Hmm, am I interpreting this wrong, or is this genuine, legitimate advice?"

Acting!
posted by boo_radley at 5:18 PM on May 15, 2012 [8 favorites]

Fucker is 85 years old!

Maybe Christopher Lee shared some of his Potion with him.
posted by The Whelk at 5:23 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

It's like he drank Dick Clark's blood or something!

TOO SOON
posted by shakespeherian at 5:28 PM on May 15, 2012 [6 favorites]

I think you mean "for Pete's sake".
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 5:52 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

'Heavens to Murgatroid!'
posted by shakespeherian at 5:57 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

Oh for crying out loud.

Are you trying to say that
a) subcultures don't influence people's behavior
b) subcultures do influence behavior but we shouldn't talk about it
c) subcultures can influence behaviors but the discussion of Romney and his Mormonism and his weird behavior is a bad example of this
d) something else
posted by andoatnp at 5:59 PM on May 15, 2012 [6 favorites]

What is the something else?
posted by andoatnp at 6:14 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

I think Mitto's distinct pole-up-the-ass body language is more the result of a life of martinis and golf tans than his religious background.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 6:19 PM on May 15, 2012 [1 favorite]

I think Mitto's distinct pole-up-the-ass body language is more the result of a life of martinis and golf tans than his religious background.

Andrew Sullivan had a couple of posts about whether Romney's weird behavior might be because of his Mormonism here and here, by the way. The second post has links to critical posts from Althouse and Reynolds worth considering as well.
posted by andoatnp at 6:22 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

Eh, to be honest, it just seems like the kind of shitty othering that I don't think has a place in any discussion about Mitt. How the faith has shaped his beliefs and policies, sure, but his body language? "Mormons walk like this"? It's childish, unsurprising from Sullivan, and would be totally irrelevant even if it were true.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 6:26 PM on May 15, 2012 [4 favorites]

I'm assuming this advice is being given in case Romney becomes the New Warden of this country.
posted by PapaLobo at 6:49 PM on May 15, 2012 [4 favorites]

I think Mitto's distinct pole-up-the-ass body language is more the result of a life of martinis and golf tans than his religious background.

Well, Romney is known to completely abstain, outside of tasting a beer, from alcohol.

It has been my experience that individuals who live the martinis and golf lifestyle tend to not actually hold the pole-up-the-ass quality.

I kind of feel like I'm veering very near defending Mitt Romney, and it feels kind of strange.
posted by ndfine at 6:52 PM on May 15, 2012 [1 favorite]

If you have to ask, it's not worth discussing with you.

One can see why this line of conversation quickly gets frustrating.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 7:04 PM on May 15, 2012 [6 favorites]

Anyhoo, on watching it again, I'm struck by how the best satire is when you're not quite sure you're being had, until the very end. Lipton did a great job here.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 7:07 PM on May 15, 2012

Hmm, am I interpreting this wrong, or is this genuine, legitimate advice? I was expecting the entire thing to be full-on snark, but it seems well-intentioned, at least until the last couple minutes where clips of Romney are juxtaposed with Lipton's questions as a gag.

I think that's what makes it so devastating and compelling. Imagine if a well-dressed man and obviously knowledgable strolled up to you and helpfully, but thoroughly, deconstructed your wardrobe. Told you all about how you were dressing wrong and if you were trying to hide (imperfect), well, you were just making it more obvious and someone with your physique really needs to...

On the one hand, there's nothing openly snarky about it. On the other hand, he's essentially telling you you're a slob that's been airing out all your terrible imperfections and it's a wonder your mother let you leave the house like that.
posted by Ghostride The Whip at 7:26 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

I wish Lipton hadn't given in at the end with the easy footage of Mitt's stiff white guy asshatery...

He should've played it straight beginning to end...

Romney has that quality people have who're never entirely sure they're connecting in the way they want to be connecting because for one reason or another, they don't have an intuitive down to the bone understanding of the culture they're in. You see it in people who speak English as a second language or who're indeed, native English speakers, but come from a non-American background and they're about 90% fully there or even 95% or 99% there, with that instinctual understanding of the culture, but that last gap in their comfort level with the culture is always going to give their interactions a hesitation/stiffness or formality that comes across as slightly cagey or hedging, or worse of all, inauthentic.

I guess those things can be worked with, but there's a deeper problem with Romney, I just get the feeling he doesn't really actually like people. I mean, I think he loves his family and kids and wife, and his community and all that, but he can't really hide his disdain and condescension towards people outside of that circle. It's a massive shortcoming and one that is going to be a glaring shortcoming when and if he's in the same room as Obama in the debates.
posted by Skygazer at 7:30 PM on May 15, 2012 [4 favorites]

born and raised mormon and i'm here to second The World Famous's "for crying out loud." for any behaviors that you can say "mormons are like XYZ" (which is really too broad anyway because california mormons aren't utah mormons aren't arkansas mormons aren't ethiopian mormons) i wouln't say those are the behaviors on display here.

i mean, as a counter point to weird or stilted or whatever i present ken jennings.
posted by nadawi at 8:11 PM on May 15, 2012 [1 favorite]

Hmm, am I interpreting this wrong, or is this genuine, legitimate advice? I was expecting the entire thing to be full-on snark, but it seems well-intentioned, at least until the last couple minutes where clips of Romney are juxtaposed with Lipton's questions as a gag.

It's bone dry humor. There are a number of subtle digs throughout the piece: the idea that his laughter is mirthless and false, that his wardrobe betrays his innate inauthenticity, that he is thoroughly outclassed by both Reagan and Palin, that he is miscast, that he flat-out lacks the skills to pretend to be anything that he is not.

It reminds me of when Stephen Sondheim wrote a scathing letter to the editor about William Safire. Safire did not respond to Sondheim's criticisms, but instead level-headedly critiqued his phraseology. It was damned witty, even though I think Sondheim was ultimately in the right.
posted by Sticherbeast at 8:13 PM on May 15, 2012 [3 favorites]

No no no, I think mean, "Oh my heck!"
posted by Brocktoon at 8:54 PM on May 15, 2012

I do not at all dig this recent thing of having a camera on a person from the side. The one that they're not talking to, suddenly there and making the person in the scene seem super awkward. It feels like it's a new-ish thing, and apologies for not discussing Romney at the moment. But dear video editors: when you do that, it totally undermines whatever point a person's making, unless they then turn and address the next camera. Talking into a camera is already not normal, but it's a convention we're accustomed to. Adding a meta to that makes everything a bit terrible.
posted by lauranesson at 9:28 PM on May 15, 2012

Marisa Stole the Precious Thing: "Eh, to be honest, it just seems like the kind of shitty othering that I don't think has a place in any discussion about Mitt."

Actually, I said that in defense of Romney. Mitt's weird mannerisms shouldn't be relevant to the campaign, but since we're already here discussing them, it's worth mentioning that there's a perfectly innocuous explanation for them.

It would be reasonably acceptable to explain "Oh, he talks funny, and likes hockey and pickled fish because he's from Minnesota" to a person who had never had any contact with a Minnesotan or listened to NPR on a Saturday night, even though not all Minnesotans talk like Sarah Palin or enjoy hockey and pickled herring. (And, let's face it, those things are very distinct and foreign to a large swath of America, so you'd probably be asking questions about it if you never encountered it before. I know this metaphor isn't great.)

Since a great many Americans don't really know much about the Mormon faith, let alone socialize with members of the church, it's worth bringing this up because they might not be familiar with the fact that the Mormons are generally a tight-knit community with a rather distinct subculture. Mormons are certainly not all poured from the same mold, but it shouldn't be a huge controversy to suggest that Romney's everyday behavior and mannerisms are influenced by his faith and the community where he was raised.

I can't speak for every LDS Stake in America, but the one that covered my hometown played an absolutely huge role in the lives of its congregants, and interacted very little with the community at large (although I do remember that the Stake in one of our neighboring counties was much better integrated into its geographic community, so I can believe that the Mormon subculture isn't as distinct in some places as it is in others).

It's generally accepted that Romney doesn't use profanity because of his faith...why is it such a huge leap to suggest that it hasn't influenced his personality and demeanor in other ways?
posted by schmod at 9:36 PM on May 15, 2012 [3 favorites]

lauranesson: "But dear video editors: when you do that, it totally undermines whatever point a person's making, unless they then turn and address the next camera. "

Eh, it's not a terrible technique, but it really doesn't work here. For one, it's a terribly composed shot. The flowers in particular have no business being in that shot. My guess is that James Lipton's cameramen are used to filming him doing interviews, or that the videographers were amateurs supplied by NY Magazine.
posted by schmod at 9:39 PM on May 15, 2012

well, i've never personally met a mormon who can't manage to laugh with their whole face or convey empathy. i just flat don't think that the weirdness about romney is a mormon weirdness. in fact, i'd say the enduring stereotype about mormons is that they're too friendly, to the point of it being disconcerting. that's not a trait i'd say ole mittens possesses.
posted by nadawi at 10:09 PM on May 15, 2012 [1 favorite]

It's generally accepted that Romney doesn't use profanity because of his faith...why is it such a huge leap to suggest that it hasn't influenced his personality and demeanor in other ways?

The profanity thing is probably based on something Bible-related. Suggesting that he has a stiff, almost inhuman demeanor and an insincere smile because of his religion is pretty shitty. I mean, far be it from me to defend Mormonism as a faith, but we could probably accept that Mormons themselves are human beings who express a wide range of personality types, much like the rest of humanity. Not sure "he probably has no sense of humor because he's a Muslim" would go down real well.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 10:31 PM on May 15, 2012 [2 favorites]

I just came here to point out that James Lipton wrote the teleplay for the television musical Copacabana, starring Barry Manilow.

That is all.
posted by hippybear at 10:40 PM on May 15, 2012

Yes, discussions where someone doesn't get why members of various minorities get annoyed when people posit that a public figure's personality or mannerisms are attributable to his membership in that minority are frustrating.

You're correct. Although Mormons are creepy and weird and Romney is also creepy and weird, it would be better not to speculate that the reason Romney is creepy and weird is because he is Mormon.
posted by andoatnp at 10:46 PM on May 15, 2012

Am I creepy and weird?

I'm pretty sure I am, and I'm not Mormon.
posted by hippybear at 10:56 PM on May 15, 2012

Am I creepy and weird?

Are you Mitt Romney?
posted by andoatnp at 11:00 PM on May 15, 2012 [1 favorite]

Any adult who still believes in fairy tales is creepy and weird, yes. Let's not pretend otherwise.
posted by dvdgee at 12:29 AM on May 16, 2012

Yes, if you're Mormon I almost certainly think you're creepy and weird. I would be happy to provide you with a list of questions about your beliefs and practices so we can confirm it.
posted by andoatnp at 12:32 AM on May 16, 2012

Note: Help maintain a healthy, respectful discussion by focusing comments on the
issues, topics, and facts at hand—not at other members of the site.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 12:57 AM on May 16, 2012 [4 favorites]

Am I creepy and weird?

Alternatively, if you have to ask, it's not worth discussing with you.
posted by andoatnp at 12:57 AM on May 16, 2012 [3 favorites]

Well, I think that whether something or someone is weird or normal depends a lot on the context. For example, within the context of Metafilter, people acting like the Atheist Rationality Police are certainly normal, i.e., within the range of what is typically expected. But do they also come off as creepy? Or rude? Narrow-minded?

To me, often, they appear to be a kind of mirror image of their religious foes, stern guardians of truth who demand that everyone agree with their rigid and obviously correct worldview.
posted by overglow at 1:00 AM on May 16, 2012 [5 favorites]

Mod note: Cut it out, andoatnp; this is not the place for a) attacking other users, b) turning every mention of Romney into an anti-religion/Morman crusade.
posted by taz (staff) at 1:17 AM on May 16, 2012 [3 favorites]

I am offended by this thread on behalf of all creepy and weird people.
posted by palidor at 3:47 AM on May 16, 2012 [2 favorites]

Hmm, am I interpreting this wrong, or is this genuine, legitimate advice? I was expecting the entire thing to be full-on snark

This is full-on snark by a master. James Lipton rules.
posted by thinkpiece at 4:16 AM on May 16, 2012 [1 favorite]

I'm shocked that metafilter doesn't blame his creepy weirdness on his Republicanism,
posted by blue_beetle at 5:31 AM on May 16, 2012 [1 favorite]

Marisa Stole the Precious Thing: "Suggesting that he has a stiff, almost inhuman demeanor and an insincere smile because of his religion is pretty shitty"

I never said that.
posted by schmod at 5:33 AM on May 16, 2012

schmod: "Again, there's nothing necessarily wrong with any of this. However, I think that a lot of Romney's perceived "oddness" may come from the fact that he comes from an American subculture that many of us are unfamiliar with, and might actually have very little to do with his wealth"

He didn't grow up in a fuckin' compound in Utah; his dad was the governor of Utah. Plus, he had plenty of socialization training beating up weirdos at prep school and corporate raiding. He's not a teenager on a mission, he's a 60-something-year-old guy who's been out in the world.
posted by notsnot at 5:40 AM on May 16, 2012

As a Jew from New York who has lived in Salt Lake City for the last 14 years, I agree that the Saints are tuned in to a slightly different frequency. Not objectionably so. On the whole, they are above-average neighbors and co-workers. But the difference is there, I assure you. I often feel that they are communicating with me in what is, to them, a second language.
posted by Trurl at 5:48 AM on May 16, 2012 [5 favorites]

Guess it's fortunate then that he was raised in Michigan.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 5:50 AM on May 16, 2012

notsnot: " his dad was the governor of Utah."

Er, Michigan. Good job letting the air out of your own argument, dumbass.
posted by notsnot at 5:58 AM on May 16, 2012

Hey now. Let's keep this civil.
posted by schmod at 6:21 AM on May 16, 2012 [1 favorite]

I'm allowed to call myself names, yes?
posted by notsnot at 6:26 AM on May 16, 2012

Everyone needs a hug, notsnot...
posted by Skygazer at 6:55 AM on May 16, 2012 [1 favorite]

Can some of this creepy and weird stuff go to Metatalk, or better yet just stop?

Al Gore was also pretty famous for robotoid stick-up-the-buttness and he and Romney are political ideological opposites.
posted by Cookiebastard at 7:01 AM on May 16, 2012

I am creepy and wierd, and I am sitting here silently judging all of you.
posted by vibrotronica at 8:59 AM on May 16, 2012 [1 favorite]

Al Gore was also pretty famous for robotoid stick-up-the-buttness and he and Romney are political ideological opposites.

Given Romney's notorious penchant for flip-flops, I suspect that assumptions about his ideology are mostly partisan wish fulfillment.
posted by Trurl at 8:59 AM on May 16, 2012

I can't see him in flip-flops. That would be "who let the dogs out" all over again. Birkenstocks, mmaaayyybe.
posted by seanmpuckett at 9:10 AM on May 16, 2012 [1 favorite]

As a fellow non-smizer-on-command I sympathize with Romney there - even the DMV guy has told me to stop smiling before taking my drivers license photo. I'm whatever the opposite of a Mormon is (a Nomrom?) so it's not a faith thing.
posted by Blue Meanie at 10:13 AM on May 16, 2012

It's generally accepted that Romney doesn't use profanity because of his faith...why is it such a huge leap to suggest that it hasn't influenced his personality and demeanor in other ways?

schmod, the problem is (IMO) that it's stretching credulity.

By analogy, to say Herman Caine used certain phrases because he was black, and some of those phrases were more common amongst African Americans, is nigh-on statistically indisputable.

To suggest that Herman Caine's gait, poise, and laughter were quintessentially due to his upbringing by an African American family is beyond the pale of rational thought.

There are too many Mormons to categorize such subtle affectations and personality quirks as "typical of Mormons", or "due to Mormon upbringing".
posted by IAmBroom at 11:08 AM on May 16, 2012

I worked hard getting this creepy and weird, and I'm not letting the dark lord Mor-Mon take any of the credit!
posted by FatherDagon at 12:04 PM on May 16, 2012 [2 favorites]

I'm taking back Creepy and Weird (C&W)™.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 12:19 PM on May 16, 2012

We just need to "unzip him and let the real Mitt Romney out"; though that could be problematic because "My husband [Romney] isn’t stiff, OK?"
I still can't believe those quotes. You can't make this stuff up.

Like TheWhiteSkull, I have to object to the comparison between Romney and Dukat mentioned above. Dukat could be charming and suave, which is what made him so dangerous and manipulative.

Continuing on the Star Trek theme, I have to recommend (Tumblr alert) Romnoid. My personal favorites: 1, 2.
posted by dhens at 7:28 PM on May 16, 2012 [1 favorite]

Mitt Romney Doesn’t Remember What He Said, But Stands By ‘Whatever it Was’
posted by homunculus at 7:11 PM on May 18, 2012

Romney presidency to be all kittens and niceness.
posted by Artw at 6:53 PM on May 20, 2012