DAMN HENNESSY, WHERE YOU FIND THIS TRACK?
April 25, 2013 10:54 AM   Subscribe

COMMERCE, MY FACELESS INTERNET FRIENDS, IS BEAUTIFUL. CVS Bangers is a parody mixtape from Hennessy Youngman.
posted by mkb (44 comments total) 21 users marked this as a favorite
 
Henny previously
posted by Potomac Avenue at 10:57 AM on April 25, 2013


Also fuck CVS in the heart forever for purifying my ears when I'm trying to get Cherrys Garcia and a pack of Camels at 2am.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 10:58 AM on April 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Also this mix needs the HOT FIYAH tag.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:01 AM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


Oh, damn. 1:58. Yes, indeed, this is a hot mixtape.

C V S BANGERS.
posted by grabbingsand at 11:04 AM on April 25, 2013


AHahah the guy going C V S B A N G E R S

this is gold
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:04 AM on April 25, 2013


**E*X *C **L *U** SI** V *E**
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:05 AM on April 25, 2013


i just put this on in the background in my office. it works.
posted by mrgrimm at 11:06 AM on April 25, 2013


This made me go check if Pete Tong still dropped that "ESSENTIAL" into his mixes.

And yes, he does.
posted by grabbingsand at 11:08 AM on April 25, 2013


*holds up lighter for Long's memorial tribute song*
posted by benzenedream at 11:13 AM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


I listened to this -- twice, just to be certain -- and I thought it was lame. As a serious question, can someone explain what I don't get? Do you need to have listened to endless, self-important mixtapes to see how it parodies them? (I know that explaining a joke kills it, but I really want to know what is making this tick.)
posted by wenestvedt at 11:15 AM on April 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


What a minute. THAT'S NOT STEVE PERRY!
posted by mrgrimm at 11:18 AM on April 25, 2013


not sure if joking

He's a Penn MFA. He's definitely doing this as satire with a nugget of truth wedged in the chewy middle.
posted by The Michael The at 11:18 AM on April 25, 2013


wenestvedt: Yes, but there is a reason for the tropes. DJs talk over stuff that nobody else has so that they can't be bootlegged, or that if the tracks are bootlegged, the source is known. The contents of this mix are beyond easily available that this is obviously unnecessary and ludicrous.
posted by mkb at 11:19 AM on April 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


The trick is that you just got ART in the face BOO YA KA SHA
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:20 AM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


All I know is after five minutes of listening to this, I have an insatiable desire for nail polish, vitamin D caplets, jumbo chocolate covered almonds, a Diet Dr. Pepper, and the latest issue of People.
posted by gnomeloaf at 11:26 AM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


The store across the street from me has some kind of setup that plays the American Top 40 from the same date in 1976. They have been doing it for like 10 years now so even though I don't really remember the radio from 1976, I remember hearing it last year, and the year before, and the year before that, It is a total mindfuck. I wish they would subtly alter it so Casey Kasem would say shit like "Damn where you find this son" and "Trapaholics" over songs like Midnight At The Oasis.
posted by Ad hominem at 11:26 AM on April 25, 2013 [4 favorites]


I love this. CVS music is so enjoyable.

See also Barach Obama Battles the Pink Robots by the same guy. Barack saves a kitty!
posted by Rory Marinich at 11:30 AM on April 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


The link is BROKEN! For me it's always broken.
posted by a shrill fucking shitstripe at 11:56 AM on April 25, 2013


Hahahahahahaha. I won't lie, I am feeling this.
posted by clavicle at 11:58 AM on April 25, 2013


And lost it at Oh Sherry. SHOULDABEENGOHOOOONE
posted by clavicle at 12:07 PM on April 25, 2013


I really want to know what is making this tick

These are the shitty old songs you hear while you shop in CVS. I believe the gunshots are either listeners shooting themselves in the head or the CVS getting robbed. Or else a mockery of those comps where the music is talked over (or airhorned over?) so you can't record it.

The joke, I think, is that, despite the fact that almost everything gets resampled or stolen ... these songs will definitely not, and they were all HUGE hits.

Who sampled Donna Lewis?

Oh damn. I just got to Islands. Oh well. So much for that theory.

Actually, I am MUCH more likely to hear Ghetto Supastar than Islands in my CVS.

Btw, what the fuck ever happened to Pras? (Or Mya for that matter ... oh hey, happy birthday!)

What was I talking about?

Oh: A LANNISTER ALWAYS PAYS HIS DEBTS. lol.
posted by mrgrimm at 12:11 PM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


And lost it at Oh Sherry. SHOULDABEENGOHOOOONE

Seriously. That's not Steve Perry. Somebody tell me who it is or I'm gonna bug all day.
posted by mrgrimm at 12:12 PM on April 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


*holds up lighter for Long's memorial tribute song*

Don't Touch My Kool-Aid
posted by mrgrimm at 12:16 PM on April 25, 2013


yup, 1/2 an hour of this music is about when i begin to feel my mind slipping to the edge of some terribly lovecraftian abyss, ironic distance or no. So thankful I've never had to have a job that entailed immersion in this stuff. Sympathy to the workers who have or do. RESPECT!
posted by notesondismantling at 12:45 PM on April 25, 2013


SELF-CHECKOUT
posted by interrupt at 12:51 PM on April 25, 2013


So thankful I've never had to have a job that entailed immersion in this stuff.

Summer 1990 - I painted houses with a guy who insisted we listen to Top 40 radio all day. Those were the days of once-an-hour rotations (Vision of Love, Can't Touch This, Another Day in Paradise). After a while, you can get into it .. then fucking Jude Cole comes on for the 7th time that day and you just fucking lose it.
posted by mrgrimm at 12:58 PM on April 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Laaayyydee in red ...

DAYUM HENNESSY WHERE YOU FIND THIS TRACK?

Laayyydee in red ...
posted by zippy at 12:59 PM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


Seriously. That's not Steve Perry. Somebody tell me who it is or I'm gonna bug all day.

It's driving me batshit, too. It's not any of the versions from iTunes (unless one of the "Steve Perry" versions isn't him); I listened to two epically bad "made famous by" covers from compilation albums that were definitely not this one, and about 3 seconds of the "Rock of Ages" version. This one just sounds like generic butt-rock singer with a slight foreign accent singing over a really uninspired backing track; it's somehow less funky than the original.
posted by uncleozzy at 1:02 PM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


Related: The Secret Pirate Radio Show of Terry Wogan.
posted by zippy at 1:04 PM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


Yes, zippy that is what I thought of also.
posted by mkb at 1:11 PM on April 25, 2013


He may be chock full of cheese, but man, Steve Perry has pipes.
posted by mrgrimm at 1:27 PM on April 25, 2013


I am literally laughing so hard at this that I'm crying. Oh my goddddddd
posted by mintcake! at 1:36 PM on April 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Damn son, where'd you find this. please mods, next April fools make Metafilter auto play this clip.
posted by Ad hominem at 2:04 PM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


I love the self-inflicted gunshot effect
posted by Tom-B at 2:08 PM on April 25, 2013


Actually. I have a better idea. Someone here who wants to be rich and internet famous should create a web site and an iOS app that "mixtapeifies" an mp3 or youtube video by putting those sound effects and voice clips in them. I'd love an SOTU that starts with "Oh my god, Swagga on a million, a hundred trillion"
posted by Ad hominem at 2:17 PM on April 25, 2013


I wish I was the guy that says thing on rap mixtapes. "HEY HOWS IT GOINNGGGGG KIDSSSS WHO WANTS OMLETTTTTTES"
posted by Potomac Avenue at 2:20 PM on April 25, 2013 [8 favorites]


*YOU ARE NOW LISTENING TO ARAABMUZIK*
posted by en forme de poire at 3:02 PM on April 25, 2013


From SoundCloud comments: there gonna be so many babies born 9 months from now
posted by porn in the woods at 3:38 PM on April 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


wenestvedt: "As a serious question, can someone explain what I don't get?"

mkb and mrgrimm got the gist of it right, but this is basically a straight style parody of Flosstradamus' mixes B⚠NNED and B⚠NNED 2. These are both trap mixes which feature all the over-the-top deep-voiced announcer tags and shotgun cocking sound effects on display in the linked mix. The hilarity comes from the framing of a mix of lite rock as if it were intense club bangers.

Tangentially related is Dieselboy's 2004 drum 'n bass mix The Dungeonmaster's Guide, which has Peter Cullen on announcer duty.
posted by t3h933k at 5:41 PM on April 25, 2013


That style is way older than trap. The reggae DJs on my college's radio station were doing this 10 years ago, probably longer.
posted by mkb at 6:01 PM on April 25, 2013


Yeah, t3h933k, Flosstsradamus caught the tail end of this train. Many many many UKG tracks are covered in announcers saying catchphrases as well as gun noises. And southern hip hop mixtapes have been doing this for years. To my knowledge, Flosstradamus directly lifted his gun noises and announcer tags from the Trap-a-holics mixtapes, which in turn took their cues from the Millenium mixtapes, which in turn took their cues from blah blah blah.
posted by Cpt. The Mango at 6:04 PM on April 25, 2013


>...which in turn took their cues from blah blah blah.

I should have figured as much; the mixes I referenced were just the quickest stylistic parallel I thought of.

(The rabbit hole of references you quickly find yourself in should you bother to look is one of the things I find most compelling about music.)
posted by t3h933k at 7:26 PM on April 25, 2013


Ah. Makes sense: deliberately talking over stuff is a nails-on-the-chalkboard thing for me, so it sounds like he found his mark.

Thank you for healing my squareness in the nicest possible way. :7)

I worked in the take-out/delivery area of a restaurant, many years ago, which possesses only two Muzak tapes: one was show tunes, and then other I think was aging Soft Rock...which, in the late 1980s, meant a lot of "Lady in Reeeeeeeed/ Is dancing with meeeeeeeeeeeeeee."

The coke-addled owner or the drunken manager would only unlock the closet with the Muzak machine every couple of weeks, so one or the other would be on endless rotation -- but you never knew which one it would be!
posted by wenestvedt at 6:55 AM on April 26, 2013


Volume 2
posted by mkb at 6:21 AM on May 20, 2013 [2 favorites]


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