Por que eles morrem?
June 4, 2013 3:07 PM   Subscribe

 
"I see water dropping!"

Yeah, kid, you do. You do.
posted by sutt at 3:15 PM on June 4, 2013 [12 favorites]


I saw this earlier today. Hard to argue with his reasoning. And he is SO damn cute!
posted by Uncle Grumpy at 3:16 PM on June 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


He's right, of course. (I'm a meat eater and simply accept that I'm an awful person.)
posted by naju at 3:16 PM on June 4, 2013 [8 favorites]


I think "right" is pretty subjective. This video is flippin' adorable and I love the kid's compassion for animals, and I wouldn't disabuse him of those ideas at that age.

But animals eat animals too. For everything but us humans, animal life is short and terrifying and violent. It's cool if you don't want to eat animals out of compassion, but that doesn't necessarily mean you are "right" about the moral validity of this human animal eating another kind of animal.
posted by lazaruslong at 3:22 PM on June 4, 2013 [13 favorites]


Wow, what a great kid. (Also a meat eater, and almost always anemic, sadly)
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 3:22 PM on June 4, 2013


These animals... we have to take care of them, not eat them.

Reasonable minds can differ, on this.
posted by eugenen at 3:27 PM on June 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


The fact that there's a video rolling throughout the dialogue suggests the cute little fella was "coached". I don't necessarily begrudge the general message here, but call me cynical in that this feels fairly scripted.
posted by Wizzle at 3:29 PM on June 4, 2013


Nah, for me, much as I hate to say it, I can't come up with a defense of eating meat. In the first world in this day and age, it involves making a choice to cause suffering and death unnecessarily, and so it's callous, and cruel, especially given the reality of the meat industry. We could improve the lot of animals but we choose to make it worse instead. That's on us and I, for one, don't deny it.

But like Naju, I still eat meat and accept that that's a weakness in myself. Bring on the vat-grown steaks, I say!

I have a huge respect for the kid's compassion and moral instinct.
posted by Drexen at 3:31 PM on June 4, 2013 [12 favorites]


No cynicism necessary- three year olds can come up with all sorts of reasons not to eat what is put in front of them. Or no reason at all.
posted by ambrosia at 3:31 PM on June 4, 2013 [7 favorites]


You think it's suspicious that a modern parent is capturing video of their child? That is... an odd suspicion to have from my perspective (early 30s, on social media, lots of new babies around).
posted by nathancaswell at 3:32 PM on June 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


Thou art god, I am god. All that groks is god.
posted by AElfwine Evenstar at 3:35 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


Nah, doesn't feel scripted - kids can have insight like this.

However, he's three, which I am assuming means it's likely he'll forget he said this within a week or so.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 3:35 PM on June 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


Oof, right in the feels.
posted by Ad hominem at 3:36 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


I don't know, it always bothers me a little bit when we encourage each other to anthropomorphize children.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 3:42 PM on June 4, 2013 [65 favorites]


Give that kid a reincarnation test.


I used to eat octopus and it's delicious. But I stopped a long time ago. I think they display enough sentience that they're too close to eating another intelligent being. I think a simple moment of thanks can cover a fish. It becomes exponentially harder the smarter your food gets.
posted by Smedleyman at 3:46 PM on June 4, 2013 [18 favorites]


Who tries to feed octopus to a 3-year-old?
posted by dortmunder at 3:49 PM on June 4, 2013


It kind of leaves you hanging at the end though. "So this octopus is similar to meat..."

"WELL IN THAT CASE NOMNOMNOMNOM."
posted by Kabanos at 3:51 PM on June 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


I know when I was that age, I'd have tried any rationale that worked to get out of eating something like octopus.
posted by .kobayashi. at 3:51 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


One of my kids paused while eating and said, "Wait, is 'chicken' like 'A chicken'?"
"Yes."
"Weird." *Nomnomnom*
posted by artychoke at 3:52 PM on June 4, 2013 [11 favorites]


Hopefully that kid never watches Game of Thrones.
posted by fshgrl at 4:02 PM on June 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


I was given octopus at an older, but still young age, being told they were "Italian French fries."

It was weird.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 4:04 PM on June 4, 2013


Who tries to feed octopus to a 3-year-old?

Kids will eat some pretty fancy stuff if you don't corrupt them with crap. When I was around that age, my favorite thing to eat in the entire world was roasted nori/seaweed. I would literally walk around the house munching on big sheets of it. Then I went to school and discovered the laboratory wonder of Yellow 5.

My nephew would eat calamari as a toddler - but his parents told him it was pasta. When he was 5, he got really interested in Anglerfish for some reason. So Salmon became Anglerfish, because Anglerfish were cool looking, and it (temporarily) got him to eat it for a while. So just lie to your kids and hold off on the sweet sweet Yellow 5 for as long as you can.
posted by raztaj at 4:06 PM on June 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


When he was 5, he got really interested in Anglerfish for some reason. So Salmon became Anglerfish, because Anglerfish were cool looking
posted by nathancaswell at 4:08 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


I became a vegetarian around that age. Family legend records I stated 'I don't wanna eat poor wee dear wee dead little animals'. And that was it.

23 years later I got ambushed by a sausage roll at a party and I was a vege no more.

In my defence, it smelt really good.
posted by Sebmojo at 4:13 PM on June 4, 2013 [4 favorites]


No cynicism necessary- three year olds can come up with all sorts of reasons not to eat what is put in front of them.

OK kid, you know that desert you love so much? It's made from horses hooves.

Personally, I was hoping the kid was gonna say he refused to eat it because watching OldBoy put him off squid for life...
posted by PeterMcDermott at 4:17 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


The fact that there's a video rolling throughout the dialogue suggests the cute little fella was "coached". I don't necessarily begrudge the general message here, but call me cynical in that this feels fairly scripted.

the pixels are octopus shaped it is a dead giveaway
posted by Sebmojo at 4:17 PM on June 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


OK, this kid's gonna grow up to be either the Messiah or the Antichrist, but one way or another, he will lead millions of people to their doom.
posted by Atom Eyes at 4:31 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


I saw this earlier today. Hard to argue with his reasoning. And he is SO damn cute!
Well, with a chicken or cow, unlike an octopus, the animals mostly wouldn't exist in the first place if they weren't going to be eaten. So it's not like they'd be happy in the fields, they just wouldn't exist. So it's not actually difficult to argue with the actual reasoning he uses.
The fact that there's a video rolling throughout the dialogue suggests the cute little fella was "coached". I don't necessarily begrudge the general message here, but call me cynical in that this feels fairly scripted.
Little kids are capable of saying interesting things. There's the star wars according to a 3 year old thing that was all over the internet a couple years ago. Also, parents like to film their kids all the time, there are plenty of "kid eats whatever for the first time" videos on youtube as well, for example
I know when I was that age, I'd have tried any rationale that worked to get out of eating something like octopus.
Yeah that's the thing. I don't think I would have wanted to eat an octopus at that age and it didn't have anything to do with concern over their well being.
Kids will eat some pretty fancy stuff if you don't corrupt them with crap. When I was around that age, my favorite thing to eat in the entire world was roasted nori/seaweed.
They'll eat anything if you don't tell them what it is. But they might not want to eat an animal that looks gross, such as an octopus. Your friend and Bulgaroktonos both ate it, but were told it was something else.
posted by delmoi at 4:31 PM on June 4, 2013


I used to eat octopus and it's delicious. But I stopped a long time ago. I think they display enough sentience that they're too close to eating another intelligent being. I think a simple moment of thanks can cover a fish. It becomes exponentially harder the smarter your food gets.

I agree 100% with Smedleyman and his reasoning is the same reasoning I used when I decided to stop eating octopus. Squid, though, are pretty dumb thankfully.
posted by Falconetti at 4:36 PM on June 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


The moment I've learned to replace my cravings and menu options with meatless varieties, I'll go vegetarian. Maybe even vegan, though right now my dairy addiction is pretty severe. Ice cream and cheese is a potent combination.

Sometimes it's easy to make the switch. Chili made with soy protein tastes the exact same as chili made with turkey or buffalo, since there it's all about the texture. Other times it's harder. Veggie burgers just aren't burgers, dammit, and unless I learn to kill my love for burgers, I'm SOL there. California rolls are great but a sushi dinner needs a variety (maybe there are other animal-free sushi varieties I could substitute in?). And fried chicken is fried chicken. No way around that.

I have no doubts that meat-free consumption is the future of the world's diet, but I do wonder how long it'll take for the transition to happen. Could be decades, or could be centuries.
posted by Rory Marinich at 4:42 PM on June 4, 2013


Newsflash, kid: your cuddly little polvo ain't no vegetarian.
posted by gottabefunky at 4:54 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


It's so weird being reminded of Kids And Food tropes from America after living in Japan for half a decade and working at schools. I've seen elementary school kids compete to get more salad. Octopus is a completely ordinary thing to eat, here (though I'm not fond of invertebrates myself, overall).

tl;dr guys check out how important I am for living in japan
posted by DoctorFedora at 5:10 PM on June 4, 2013 [7 favorites]


Yep. I've given up eating octopus too. I've seen too many videos on how incredibly intelligent they are at this point.
posted by panaceanot at 5:12 PM on June 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


Pigs are stupid, though. Right?

Right?
posted by Atom Eyes at 5:15 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


When my kid was this age she finally figured out that the meat isn't expressed through the cow's udders. She told us "I don't want any animals to die so that I have to eat." She's almost 8 now and she's stuck firmly to her guns. She's the only vegetarian in her entire school and she'll use just about every opportunity she can take to talk to her classmate about vegetarianism.

She unintentionally guilt trips us occasionally. "Oh you're eating bacon? That used to be a pig, right? I hope it was happy while it lived."
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 5:22 PM on June 4, 2013 [10 favorites]


AElfwine Evenstar: "Thou art god, I am god. All that groks is god.

IT WAS A PHASE DAMMIT

posted by lazaruslong at 5:25 PM on June 4, 2013 [4 favorites]


I don't think it's weird for parents to offer a kid octopus, or for the kid to potentially just eat it. (I do think his response was very cute, though.)

I do think it's weird for people to automatically expect that children will only want to eat chicken nuggets and french fries, or whatever it is that is supposedly "child friendly".

When I was that kid's age, supposedly my favourite foods in the world were feijoas, mushrooms and olives. And we were just served whatever the adults were eating for dinner each night. My brother was super picky, so I get that some kids are, and he went six months as a toddler eating nothing but peanut butter out of the jar. But it's kind of weird expectation that every child will be a picky eater, or that some foods are just naturally not suitable to offer to kids. (Except stuff that is physically dangerous for small throats or developing immune systems or whatever, of course).

And when I was a kid we walked barefoot to school in the snow both ways uphill and all...
posted by lollusc at 5:35 PM on June 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


One of my kids paused while eating and said, "Wait, is 'chicken' like 'A chicken'?"

When my daughter was about the same age we were in a BBQ joint and she was commenting on all the cute piggies that made up the bulk of the decor. "Look at that piggie. Oh, look there's 'nother piggie. Mom, did you see that piggie?" And it suddenly hit me that she didn't know why the decor was porcine themed. Ethical dilemma! We'd already ordered our food and the kid loved ribs.

So I told her, you know, it's piggy on the plate. And she looked at me for a second in silence, frowned, then burst out laughing and said "You're joking!" When I assured her I was not, she got serious again, then a beat later, "No, mom, you're joking." It took some effort--to be fair, I've always told her all kinds of made up shit, just for (my) fun--and I was a little about how it was going to go when and if I finally convinced her. By the time the food arrived, she believed me and was totally fine with it.
posted by looli at 5:59 PM on June 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


Yeah, my story's much the same, lollusc. :) For me, 'babyfood' was just parents' supper + blender. My sister got the store-bought stuff and ended up being really picky about food for ages (don't worry, she recovered).

So the moral is, BE TOUGH ON BABY MAKE BABY STRONG.
posted by Drexen at 5:59 PM on June 4, 2013


For everything but us humans, animal life is short and terrifying and violent.

Many species live 50 years or more. Several can live beyond 100. I would not necessarily describe the life of a bowhead whale, a Galapagos tortoise or a cockatoo as terrifying and violent.
posted by stargell at 6:20 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


Y'all realize that this is not a video of an American kid, right? Just because American kids would balk at octopus doesn't mean kids in other countries with other dietary cultures would have identical hangups. Plus, he's three years old.

My son, by age three, had eaten octopus (man, I wouldn't even put that in this list, because it feels so normal, but apparently some folks don't agree), snails, jellyfish, fish eggs, alligator, and crickets, knowing full well each time what he was eating. He didn't have a conceptual problem with any of them because I don't think any of them are a big deal, and he was only three years old. Pretty much all his ideas of what is normal and what is gross were learned from his mom and dad.
posted by Bugbread at 6:57 PM on June 4, 2013 [6 favorites]


Bwithh: "Following looli's wise anecdote above, I'd be more impressed if this kid said this AFTER he'd eaten delicious BBQ or the Brazilian equivalent several times"

??? So delicious Italian food (octopus and gnocchi) don't count? It's gotta be Brazilian or American?
posted by Bugbread at 6:59 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


My son, by age three, had eaten... crickets
posted by Bugbread


Eponysterical.
posted by nathancaswell at 7:16 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


Yeah, octopus doesn't strike me as a weird thing for kids to eat and like either. Both my kids ate octopus among many other not so "normal" foods and both of them always loved both it and squid. I always remember when my daughter was about age 5 or 6 and we went to a Greek restaurant with one of my cousins. He was surprised that she ate octopus and started trying to make a big deal out of it. "You don't eat octopus?" she said to him, "You better eat it before it eats you!"
posted by mygothlaundry at 7:26 PM on June 4, 2013


Like eating a tire.
posted by Steely-eyed Missile Man at 7:34 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


For everything but us humans, animal life is short and terrifying and violent.

I make no claims to moral rightness for my flexitarian lifestyle, but lazaruslong, the above is just flat-out wrong as a basic statement about animal life.

Seriously, stop buying into this notion of nature as a nonstop horror show "for everything but us humans." It's an awfully bigoted and small-minded thing to say about life on earth.

Oh, and *before* reading this thread, I watched the video and tweeted it with the description "Adorable 3-year-old instinctively groks vegetarianism." Something about him sparks grokking, I guess.
posted by mediareport at 7:50 PM on June 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


Steely-eyed Missile Man: "Like eating a tire."

Only if it's cooked very, very wrong.
posted by Bugbread at 7:57 PM on June 4, 2013


*sigh* While I don't appreciate the rounds of this video coming into everyday/vegan-friendly/omni-blowhardness, it serves no one's agenda.

Vegans (of which I am one): "See? SEE? Even the little child knows that eating an animal is wrong!"

Omnis: "Foreign kids!! WTFAMIRITE?"

Or if they're fellow Americans who have traveled: "My kids are precious and shit. They have eaten the eggs of a species you have rarely tasted because I have had the money to be able to afford this experience and they will not fucking remember it when they hit college. But hey, I have proved my child more cosmopolitan than your child, SO I WIN."

(The same last bit applies to my fellow vegans when viewing this video.)

In any case, I really hate this shitting on of each other's diets when these threads arise.
posted by Kitteh at 7:59 PM on June 4, 2013


You may not be very smart. Can I cook you up, dumb sh!t ?

You can come and try. I'm good out to 1,000-odd yards with an M39.

Speaking of which, I kill most of the meat I consume. So it's not an abstract for me. I dislike eating most store bought meat, mostly because of the way they're treated before being slaughtered. I wouldn't kick a dog or a cat. I wouldn't kick one by proxy. But plenty of people chow downMcDonald's and not have a second thought. I've eaten rat, snake, ants, crickets, roaches, beetles, locust, caribou (and eyes), grasshoppers, worms, mollejas (pretty much everything from a cow).

So the only distinction for me is the cruelty. When I hunt, I control that myself. But I wouldn't eat dog, for example. They're smart enough to interact with socially. There's more light behind their eyes than there is behind a cow's.
But in any case, our harvesting methods are destructive and there are more sustainable ways to raise animals, so I try to keep as light a footprint as I can.

In any case I suppose I'd be vegan. But I like meat. One of my kids is a vegan. I'm sympathetic to the diet. (Tough to be in training without some of the ammino acids you need from meat, liver especially. There are pills, they're not the same.)

It's kinda fun coming home to a room full of plugged in, really tender and gracious kids who understand the world and want to live a responsible life and dropping 400-odd pounds of field dressed elk on the table, rack my guns, and start butchering it and grinding it so I can get it in the freezer.

I can't imagine doing that with a dolphin or a chimp.
I don't eat pork in any form (not religious, just don't like it) so moot point there.
And I don't hunt squirrels or crows in part because they're fairly intelligent, but mostly because I don't kill what I'm not going to eat.
Creatures like rats are vermin. Smart, but they're our enemies. Eat our food. Spread disease. etc.

Always thought of it as a utilitarian philosophy with a compassionate bent. Try not to eat the ones who will feel it the most. The one's you do eat, kill quickly and humanely and be thankful for them. I'd have to go out of my way to eat octopus and the proportions don't add up for it being worth it.
If I was starving, no question I'm going to eat one.
But as it is, I have the luxury of not having to and being as humane and compassionate in my choice as possible.
posted by Smedleyman at 8:01 PM on June 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


mediareport: "I make no claims to moral rightness for my flexitarian lifestyle, but lazaruslong, the above is just flat-out wrong as a basic statement about animal life.

Seriously, stop buying into this notion of nature as a nonstop horror show "for everything but us humans." It's an awfully bigoted and small-minded thing to say about life on earth.
"

Whoa, easy there bud. I don't think that it's a bigoted and small-minded thing to say about life on Earth, and if you want to assert that it is, you're gonna need to provide some more...meat....for that assertion.

Because it seems to me that most animals spend their short lives without enough food, water, and in constant danger of being preyed upon by other animals.
posted by lazaruslong at 8:02 PM on June 4, 2013


"It is often assumed that wild animals live in a kind of natural paradise and that it is only the appearance and intervention of human agencies that bring about suffering. This essentially Rousseauian view is at odds with the wealth of information derived from field studies of animal populations. Scarcity of food and water, predation, disease and intraspecific aggression are some of the factors which have been identified as normal parts of a wild environment which cause suffering in wild animals on a regular basis." - [UCLA] UCLA Animal Care and Use Training Manual.

"You have to account for the fact that almost all animals in the wild live under stress with not enough to eat and will die violent and bloody deaths." - Stephen Fry

"It must be awful to be other kinds of stuff." - Louis CK

And more and more and more. If I'm wrong, I'd love to hear why you think so. But to just call my views bigoted and small minded in a drive-by without any assertions to back it up is laaaaaaaaame. Nature isn't Paradise.
posted by lazaruslong at 8:13 PM on June 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


Kitteh: "Or if they're fellow Americans who have traveled: "My kids are precious and shit. They have eaten the eggs of a species you have rarely tasted because I have had the money to be able to afford this experience and they will not fucking remember it when they hit college."

You're reading in way, way to much. More like "fish eggs are cheap, beef is expensive, and burritos are impossible to find, so my kids have had the food that is cheap and normal for their country." I'm not bragging about how awesome my kids' diets are, I'm just pointing out to people saying "Whoa, kid eats octopus, fucking insane!" that (1) folks in other countries do, in fact, eat other foods, and that (2) three year-olds aren't picky about animal types, that all comes later, around age 6 or 7.
posted by Bugbread at 8:17 PM on June 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


My wife and I used to have this thing where we would tease our children (when they were younger, maybe between 3 a new 6 years old? ) while they're really enjoying some meat. Such as while eating bacon: "How's your little piglet? Mines delicious! Oink oink! "

Partly we just wanted them to think about the connection and process between farm and dinner plate. But also because it was funny watching them struggle with the dilemma "but bacon tastes so good! "

It kind of backfired. The youngest, now 11, has been vegetarian for about a year now, and of course we have to support her decision... often means the rest of us forego meat or we cook a separate meal for her. :(

I'm a meat eater, but I'm proud of her.
posted by joz at 8:18 PM on June 4, 2013


I'm the education director of a nonprofit preschool. About two weeks ago we had a crawfish boil and the 3 and 4 year olds spent the morning playing with them and the afternoon eating them. They were totally fine with it.

However, a few weeks before when they were studying "bugs" and gardens their teacher brought some very cool snails from his garden. They had already been told on Friday of that week they'd be eating snails. When the snails appeared in the sensory table one child confirmed, "Are we eating THESE snails?" and when he was assured they would be different snails another child said, "Then let's call these Henry!"

I found it refreshing that the children were okay with seeing live food and then eating the food once it was dead. I think it's fine to eat meat (and I do with great glee) but I also try to eat food that has been treated with some respect while it was alive and do not need to be sheltered from what I'm eating.

As an aside, that same class of 3 year olds have also eaten crickets, raw spinach, sunchokes and a healthful lunch made largely with food from our garden and a local farm every day. "American kids" are a huge and varied group and it's hard to make generalizations about their diets.
posted by Saminal at 9:08 PM on June 4, 2013 [4 favorites]


Saminal: ""American kids" are a huge and varied group and it's hard to make generalizations about their diets."

It's easy to make generalizations, but they're just that — generalizations, not absolutes. The average American kid does not eat raw egg on rice for breakfast. Some do, of course, but the average kid doesn't.

But all bets are off when you're talking about younger kids, anyway. With preschoolers, parents/caregivers have way more of an impact than society at large does.
posted by Bugbread at 9:26 PM on June 4, 2013


Nah, doesn't feel scripted - kids can have insight like this.

However, he's three, which I am assuming means it's likely he'll forget he said this within a week or so.


My stepdaughter became a vegetarian at the age of four and is still going strong 10 years later.

23 years later I got ambushed by a sausage roll at a party and I was a vege no more.

She was accidentally served a meat hot dog instead of a vegetarian one. During her first couple bites, she actually started crying because it tasted so good. Then she found out what it was and gave it away immediately. Still vegetarian.
posted by a snickering nuthatch at 10:29 PM on June 4, 2013


I make no claims to moral rightness for my flexitarian lifestyle, but lazaruslong, the above is just flat-out wrong as a basic statement about animal life.

Seriously, stop buying into this notion of nature as a nonstop horror show "for everything but us humans." It's an awfully bigoted and small-minded thing to say about life on earth.
How is it not true? Pretty much every animal is either going to get eaten, starve, or die of some untreated illness. That was true of most of humanity for most of history, even the greatest kings would see some of their children die before adulthood, risked dying from easily treatable diseases, and so on.

I mean I suppose some animals might get super-lucky in terms of location or something like that, but some are going to be super-unlucky as well.
So the only distinction for me is the cruelty. When I hunt, I control that myself. But I wouldn't eat dog, for example. They're smart enough to interact with socially.
So are pigs. I think I remember reading that George Clooney's pet pig saved him from a fire. Can't find a link now, though.
posted by delmoi at 10:52 PM on June 4, 2013


Yes, and while it's true there are some long lived species, for many, hundreds and even thousands die for that one to reach a relatively "safe" adult lifespan. Depends on the species, but turtles are a great example. Very few will make it to a size that predation becomes only an occasional threat. And even long lived whales who are heavily invested in a single young faces threat and loss from killer whales. Elephant young are killed by hyenas, starve, get lost, fall into holes... There is rarely old age for animals in the wild because they become lunch once they slow down a bit.

As for dog v cow up thread, I take issue with the notion that cows lack that spark, and argue you've just never spent enough time around cows. I won't eat dogs either, but I am fully aware it's a cultural bias and not some noblest animal thing. I eat pigs with great relish, and they out shine dogs every day of the week.

Vegetarian for 18 years starting at age 12, reborn meat eater for the past 5 or so years.
posted by [insert clever name here] at 1:40 AM on June 5, 2013


Well, with a chicken or cow, unlike an octopus, the animals mostly wouldn't exist in the first place if they weren't going to be eaten

I know, right? Like how children wouldn't exist if we didn't breed them especially, and because we did, that gives us the right to eat them.

Pretty much every animal is either going to get eaten, starve, or die of some untreated illness.

Yes, third world children are the tastiest and carry the lowest level of guilt, because if it isn't marinara, it'll just be malaria.
posted by obiwanwasabi at 4:14 AM on June 5, 2013 [1 favorite]


Whoa, easy there bud.

Sorry about the tone there, lazaruslong. I sometimes forget to be nice when I'm arguing.

I don't think that it's a bigoted and small-minded thing to say about life on Earth

But you didn't say it about life on Earth; you said it about life on Earth "for everything but us humans." I've never liked that kind of human exceptionalism, and find it's almost always bad science (not to mention that most of the NATURE RED TOOTH CLAW! formulations overemphasize conflict and underreport cooperation, but I'll leave that aside).

Because it seems to me that most animals spend their short lives without enough food, water, and in constant danger of being preyed upon by other animals.

Why would you exclude human animals from that thought?
posted by mediareport at 6:52 AM on June 5, 2013


Only if it's cooked very, very wrong.

I don't think it was cooked at all. Sushi.
posted by Steely-eyed Missile Man at 7:31 AM on June 5, 2013


“I think I remember reading that George Clooney's pet pig saved him from a fire. Can't find a link now, though.”

And you don’t eat a pig like that all at once.
posted by Smedleyman at 7:58 AM on June 5, 2013 [4 favorites]


(Y'all, the new veggie burger at Burger King is pretty damn good. I had to ask to make sure they hadn't accidentally given me a regular Whopper. That good.)
posted by ColdChef at 9:30 AM on June 5, 2013


On Being an Octopus
posted by homunculus at 10:52 AM on June 5, 2013


I think I remember reading that George Clooney's pet pig saved him from a fire.

According to my friend Wai, his family don't eat dog because a dog once saved one of his ancestors from a fire.

That wouldn't be reason enough for me though. Not if dog was very, very tasty.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 12:38 PM on June 5, 2013


An octopus saved me from drowning, once.

Still traumatised.
posted by Drexen at 12:47 PM on June 5, 2013 [1 favorite]


MetaFilter: "You're completely full of shit because [outlier / anecdotal / socioculturally-irrelevant example] clearly shows you have no idea what you're talking about".

From an American kid who at age 3 would eat escargot, knowing full well that these were the same exact gross slimy things (essentially) that my parents and I would gleefully smash in our San Francisco back garden (judge away, those things were a fucking pestilence in SFO). But according to the babysitter I refused under any circumstances to touch standard "kid fare" like, oh, SPAM or bologna.

fuck that noise, even then I had standards, man
posted by lonefrontranger at 1:54 PM on June 5, 2013 [1 favorite]


Original video is gone. Here's a replacement.
posted by deborah at 9:19 PM on June 5, 2013


I refuse to eat lobster because I consider them to be immortal and it would be a shame to eat Methuselah's "familiar spirit." Who am I to take an immortal life for the three minutes of buttery deliciousness?
posted by Monkey0nCrack at 9:13 PM on June 6, 2013


A god?
posted by Steely-eyed Missile Man at 7:11 AM on June 7, 2013


Y'all, the new veggie burger at Burger King is pretty damn good. I had to ask to make sure they hadn't accidentally given me a regular Whopper. That good.

You sure the Whopper isn't just that bad?
posted by nathancaswell at 1:41 PM on June 7, 2013


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