Thus iMessaged Zarathustra
June 6, 2013 11:21 AM   Subscribe

Somewhere in Williamsburg, a kid triumphantly flings the wrench he just used to repair his fixie into the air...
posted by The Card Cheat at 11:25 AM on June 6, 2013 [11 favorites]

That's barely enough to crush Central Park if it topples over. Apple better get on its game... I expected at least .25 Rhode Islands worth of screen.
posted by Slap*Happy at 11:28 AM on June 6, 2013

What's casting the shadow on it in the second image? (A neighboring taller monolith of all the Android phones ever sold?)
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 11:30 AM on June 6, 2013 [1 favorite]

No no no. Don't *do* the calculations. These are great Fermi Problems.
posted by DU at 11:31 AM on June 6, 2013

My god—it's full of selfies!
posted by PlusDistance at 11:31 AM on June 6, 2013 [6 favorites]

Now imagine how angry the birds would be.
posted by Rock Steady at 11:37 AM on June 6, 2013 [4 favorites]

I just noticed this week that the current model of the iPhone is basically the monolith. I mean, not quite the right dimensions, but everything about it is close enough to be "inspired by". I'm sure those designers had it in mind, at least.

Could Kubrick's estate sue?
posted by mr_roboto at 11:39 AM on June 6, 2013

I Hate it. Stuff like this strikes at the very heart of what makes New York special. Before Bloomberg and his sun blocking machines New York was gritty, vibrant and alive. Sure it was sometimes dangerous, but it was always unique. New are just like des moines, but with Disney musicals and monoliths blocking the sun. Can't wait till he is out of office so we can have the real New York back and we can all drink 64 ounce sodas and sunbathe in the park.
posted by Ad hominem at 11:41 AM on June 6, 2013 [4 favorites]

I'm with Ad hominem, I've had it up to here with these rickets!
posted by The Whelk at 11:46 AM on June 6, 2013 [1 favorite]

Imagine how big this would be if they made an iPhone that would actually be big enough for a grownup's hands.
posted by octothorpe at 12:02 PM on June 6, 2013 [1 favorite]

Best Apple Store evar.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:05 PM on June 6, 2013 [2 favorites]

This new version of the iPhone should solve the mobile advertising problem.
posted by srboisvert at 2:28 PM on June 6, 2013

not a real monolith. i've had a recurring dream of a wall of mobile phones that are entered like Alladin's Cave. its occured from before iPhones
posted by Charlemagne In Sweatpants at 4:44 PM on June 6, 2013

How much does New York weigh?

NYC weighs between 302,584,000,000,000 kg and 111,342,281,879,194,624 kg

posted by jcruelty at 12:08 PM on June 7, 2013

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