Do they have Krusty partially gelatinated non-dairy gum-based beverages?
June 7, 2013 4:21 PM   Subscribe

 
Do you think they will have a "Yard Full of Rakes" attraction?
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:34 PM on June 7, 2013 [9 favorites]


Moe's really should been darker and dingier, but I could see why you might not want to have an actual dive bar in your theme park.
posted by Hoopo at 4:35 PM on June 7, 2013 [6 favorites]


Previously.
posted by Sys Rq at 4:36 PM on June 7, 2013


Moe's is a little too bright but you can order a Flaming Moe, so I'm pretty sold.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 4:36 PM on June 7, 2013 [1 favorite]


What about shooting Apu? Is that part of the tour?
posted by Ahab at 4:38 PM on June 7, 2013 [1 favorite]


Moe's really should been darker and dingier, but I could see why you might not want to have an actual dive bar in your theme park.
Also, they might want to consider not actually spitting in every 50th Krusty Burger.
posted by Flunkie at 4:40 PM on June 7, 2013 [3 favorites]


I'm looking for a beer. Is Moe's still the best damn pet shop in town?
posted by entropicamericana at 4:41 PM on June 7, 2013 [1 favorite]


This promises to be really really good for the first eight years or so, then depressingly awful.
posted by drjimmy11 at 4:46 PM on June 7, 2013 [24 favorites]


you can order a Flaming Moe

With actual cough syrup? Purple Drank at a theme park actually sounds kinda interesting.
posted by Hoopo at 4:50 PM on June 7, 2013


What's funny is that Kwik-E-Mart, Moe's and Krusty Burger were all supposed to be disgusting (at least in the early episodes). Those locations, like the show itself, got cleaned up.
posted by 2bucksplus at 4:50 PM on June 7, 2013


So, at Moe's, can I get million dollar birthday fries?
posted by The Whelk at 4:58 PM on June 7, 2013


No million dollar birthday fries, no Aerosmith, no pints of lukewarm Guinness, no Formico, and no Neil Patrick Hairless.

More pictures here, too.
posted by box at 5:02 PM on June 7, 2013


Hey, Surly only looks out for one guy: Surly.
posted by kirkaracha at 5:04 PM on June 7, 2013


Is it still okay to strangle my son there?
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 5:13 PM on June 7, 2013 [3 favorites]


Can I score some tomacco there?
posted by InsertNiftyNameHere at 5:14 PM on June 7, 2013 [1 favorite]


They should have explained away the sparkling cleanliness of Moe's by going with an Uncle Moe's Family Feedbag approach.
posted by killdevil at 5:16 PM on June 7, 2013


How about a Skittlebrau?
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI at 5:18 PM on June 7, 2013


Such a thing does not exist.
posted by The Whelk at 5:21 PM on June 7, 2013 [4 favorites]


posted by obscure simpsons reference

What is the opposite of eponysterical? Eponybvious?
posted by Pazzovizza at 5:24 PM on June 7, 2013 [3 favorites]


Also, the gift shop has plenty of 'Bort' license plates.
posted by Pazzovizza at 5:26 PM on June 7, 2013 [12 favorites]


"Please do not bang your head against the display case. It contains very rare Mary Worth in which she has advised a friend to commit suicide."
posted by killdevil at 5:27 PM on June 7, 2013 [5 favorites]


Also, I saw Simpsons-themed Duff Beer being sold by the case in Naples when I was there in '09... I wonder if it's going to be the same thing, or if that was a Naples Thing, along with guys on motorscooters trying to sell you iPhones.
posted by Slap*Happy at 6:39 PM on June 7, 2013


I call dibs on lighting the tire fire.
posted by Mister Fabulous at 6:46 PM on June 7, 2013


The Flaming Moe glass is really ingenious. It's got a little perforated chamber of dry ice in the bottom so the liquid bubbles and steams.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 7:04 PM on June 7, 2013


Moe's really should been darker and dingier

There's something very sad about a pristine plexi-glass covered pool table.
posted by hydrophonic at 7:15 PM on June 7, 2013 [5 favorites]


Fudd? They took that off the market after all those hillbillies went blind.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 7:44 PM on June 7, 2013 [3 favorites]


I visited Universal Islands of Adventure for Harry Potter earlier this year, and I came home with this keychain, so I guess, yeah, I am the target demographic for this theme park. Probably I will feel vaguely disappointed that it isn't as thorough or as big as Disney would have done it (I mean, no monorail?! come on).

I really want the Sideshow Bob mascot to sing Gilbert and Sullivan tunes upon request.

Also, Whacking Day arcade game.
posted by sarahnade at 7:56 PM on June 7, 2013 [1 favorite]


I said it before, The Aztec Theatre, showing Itchy And Scrathy shorts.
posted by The Whelk at 8:20 PM on June 7, 2013


OK, I'm going to need about 10 hits of acid for me and my +1. Put that in a Visine bottle with a little saline. I'm in Texas, so I figure by about the time I hit the Georgia-Florida border, we'll start dropping those in both eyes. We may get arrested in Florida, however, it'll be worth it. Also, I'll be wearing a mattress that says FLORE-DUH.
posted by DecemberBoy at 10:06 PM on June 7, 2013 [1 favorite]


Where nothing can possibl-ie go wrong...
posted by dry white toast at 10:20 PM on June 7, 2013 [1 favorite]


I hope that every day they leave one glowing green rod somewhere for visitors to find.
posted by BinaryApe at 10:32 PM on June 7, 2013


The Flaming Moe Homer is neither flaming nor alcoholic? Fail.
posted by Skwirl at 10:34 PM on June 7, 2013


posted by obscure simpsons reference


Well...they are missing at least one thing...
posted by Hollywood Upstairs Medical College at 10:41 PM on June 7, 2013 [2 favorites]


One too many layers of hyperreality. Our universe is in peril.
posted by ead at 11:22 PM on June 7, 2013


This isn't faux dive this is real dive.
posted by PHINC at 11:23 PM on June 7, 2013


It's been ages since I was at Universal...Do they still blast music at mega-decibel levels everywhere you go?
posted by Thorzdad at 4:05 AM on June 8, 2013


Worst. Theme park. Ever.
posted by Joe in Australia at 5:38 AM on June 8, 2013


We want Chilly Willy! We want Chilly Willy!
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 9:26 AM on June 8, 2013


There's something very sad about a pristine plexi-glass covered pool table

How am I supposed to make sweet love to that?
posted by thelonius at 5:08 PM on June 8, 2013


Moe's is backwards. The door is supposed to be at the other end of the bar.
posted by Diag at 2:50 AM on June 10, 2013


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