Lesbians, Jews, lesbians! Lesbians, Jews! Hi Jews, we're lesbians!
June 8, 2013 8:01 PM   Subscribe

LESBIAN LIGHTNING ROUND-Do you agree with these lesbians? Here! Have a dollar. (slyt)
posted by FirstMateKate (62 comments total) 14 users marked this as a favorite
 
The best moment is the Ronald Reagan/Adam Scott question.
posted by jeather at 8:10 PM on June 8, 2013


You wouldn't think the gag of him just shouting "LESBIANS!" a lot would be funny, but it is. ROUNDING THE CORNER WITH A BUNCHA LESBIANS! LESBIANS, JEWS, LESBIANS! HI JEWS! WHAT DO YOU THINK, LESBIANS?
posted by DecemberBoy at 8:15 PM on June 8, 2013 [6 favorites]


He got a good cross-section of lesbians, too. That is basically who you'd see on the stools at any lesbian bar.
posted by DecemberBoy at 8:18 PM on June 8, 2013 [2 favorites]


Someone needs a sports bra. I'm not saying who.
posted by mudpuppie at 8:19 PM on June 8, 2013


Lesbians are Ratings Gold! (do i win a dollar?)
posted by mrhappy at 8:19 PM on June 8, 2013


My gut instinct is that this is problematic, but I guess I'm going to have to wait for five of MeFi's resident lesbians to confirm whether I am correct.
posted by triceryclops at 8:22 PM on June 8, 2013 [4 favorites]


My gut instinct is that this is problematic, but I guess I'm going to have to wait for five of MeFi's resident lesbians to confirm whether I am correct.

I've been called an "honorary lesbian" by some of my sapphically inclined friends, and this is the kind of humor they laugh about. I mean clearly these are real lesbians, unless they're really good character actors, and they weren't offended by doing it.
posted by DecemberBoy at 8:26 PM on June 8, 2013


I'm surprised that Ronald Reagan polled so well among the cadre!
posted by Sticherbeast at 8:28 PM on June 8, 2013 [4 favorites]


Jews aren't having any of that shit.



Is Emma Stone the Harry Potter girl everyone is obsessed with?
posted by Redfield at 8:30 PM on June 8, 2013


I guess Ronald Reagan has a rugged charm, if you think of him during his Hollywood acting days.
posted by koeselitz at 8:32 PM on June 8, 2013


My gut instinct is that this is problematic, but I guess I'm going to have to wait for five of MeFi's resident lesbians to confirm whether I am correct

Hi again. It's all good. Go about your daily business. Lesbian-approved. (I'm listed on the Metafilter Lesbian Delegation of Authority this weekend. Just wanted to ease your fears.)
posted by mudpuppie at 8:33 PM on June 8, 2013 [30 favorites]


Is Emma Stone the Harry Potter girl everyone is obsessed with?

That's Emma Watson. Not really sure who Emma Stone is.
posted by nooneyouknow at 8:39 PM on June 8, 2013


Is Emma Stone the Harry Potter girl everyone is obsessed with?

you are thinking of Emma Watson.

Emma Stone is the redheaded Platonic Friend #1 at the beginning of this trailer
posted by ivan ivanych samovar at 8:40 PM on June 8, 2013


I was very surprised that Steve Harvey polled so much stronger than Terry Gross.
posted by secretseasons at 8:40 PM on June 8, 2013 [9 favorites]


I'm surprised that Ronald Reagan polled so well among the cadre!

Not I; I am not at all surprised. The question was, who is sexier (not otherwise specified), and Reagan was very sexy, especially when he was a young-ish actor. I've been to the Ronald Reagan museum, and I can attest that the documents prove he absolutely was a sex symbol for a long period of time, and he was charming to the end. Hell, he was a lifeguard in high school. Of course, that's the person and not the politician.

Also, Reagan's name is much more recognizable; maybe some of them didn't know who the other guy was, or thought they heard "Adam Smith," so they took the safer route?

Good fun with or without beanplating; thanks for the post!
posted by JimInLoganSquare at 8:43 PM on June 8, 2013


The official Lesbian Mod Verdict is... hilarious.
posted by restless_nomad at 8:46 PM on June 8, 2013 [5 favorites]


I am a lady who has dated ladies, and I was a bridesmaid at a Jewish lesbian wedding, and I think it's pretty funny.

The closest I can come to getting my hackles up is that it reminds me a tiny bit of the enthusiastic lesbian essentialism of some of my gay male friends: "You are such a lesbian! Look at you! You own exactly one pair of pliers and also a screwdriver! That is the most lesbian thing ever. You lesbians just love tools and home repair."
posted by evidenceofabsence at 9:10 PM on June 8, 2013 [3 favorites]


Streep is clearly the sexiest in that question (and of all the people mentioned), and I don't know Harvey so I would vote for Terry Gross. As for Reagan being sexier than anything other than road kill - or Cheney - that's just cracked.

But I'm not a lesbian, so what do I know?
posted by jb at 9:11 PM on June 8, 2013 [1 favorite]


This is bothering me way more than it should, but am I wrong, or did he mis-tally the "winner" a bunch of times?
posted by threeants at 9:24 PM on June 8, 2013 [1 favorite]


Yes: It's Debra Messig, you gays!

Debra Messig hates you.
posted by schmod at 9:25 PM on June 8, 2013 [1 favorite]


OF COURSE IT'S STREEP GOD HOW IS THIS EVEN A QUESTION

LET'S GO LESBIANS!
posted by The Whelk at 9:27 PM on June 8, 2013 [15 favorites]


This is bothering me way more than it should, but am I wrong, or did he mis-tally the "winner" a bunch of times?

My impression was that he deliberately overrode the LESBIANS a bunch of times.
posted by restless_nomad at 9:34 PM on June 8, 2013 [1 favorite]


I agreed with the lesbians each and every time.

I don't know what this says about me. I expect it's not good. (For me.)
posted by Capt. Renault at 9:38 PM on June 8, 2013


IF THEY RUN EAST AND DOWN A BIT I CAN RECOMMEND A REALLY GOOD TRADITIIONAL AMERICANA PLACE WITH FANCY OLD TIMEY COCKTAILS
posted by The Whelk at 9:43 PM on June 8, 2013 [10 favorites]


Well you can hardly call those proper lesbians.
posted by angerbot at 10:12 PM on June 8, 2013


Proper lesbians of course have monocles.
posted by The Whelk at 10:18 PM on June 8, 2013 [8 favorites]


Is Emma Stone the Harry Potter girl everyone is obsessed with?

OF COURSE IT WAS EMMA STONE OF COURSE DUH. She was the main lady in Zombieland. All street smarts, sarcasm, and pure sweetness.
posted by rhythm and booze at 10:27 PM on June 8, 2013


Also, charming in Easy A and one of the few good things about the recent Spiderman reboot. I am on the side of the LESBIANS, Yes Emma Stone.
posted by The Whelk at 10:33 PM on June 8, 2013 [1 favorite]




What lesbians think of penii.

via homunculus's link, actually
and yay for @harto!
posted by ooga_booga at 10:53 PM on June 8, 2013


That's Emma Watson. Not really sure who Emma Stone is.

I think she's one of the X-Men.
posted by Joe in Australia at 10:56 PM on June 8, 2013 [1 favorite]


That's Numberwang!
posted by T.D. Strange at 11:02 PM on June 8, 2013 [17 favorites]


Wait, what?
posted by That's Numberwang! at 11:09 PM on June 8, 2013 [21 favorites]


You lesbians just love tools and home repair."

SO LAZY, and out of date. Where are the cats and talking through process and spunky t-shirt and jeans drag and thick woven blankets?

Solidarity is still important, across all kinds of lines, Love your sisters. Love your brothers. We are all in this together.
posted by The Whelk at 12:10 AM on June 9, 2013 [2 favorites]


(the middle aged gay male version of tools and home repair are shaved heads, beards, and black workout gear)
posted by The Whelk at 12:12 AM on June 9, 2013 [1 favorite]


we can meet in the middle with a love of fussy anachronistic cocktails
posted by The Whelk at 12:13 AM on June 9, 2013 [5 favorites]




the middle aged gay male version of tools and home repair are shaved heads, beards, and black workout gear

No, that's every other thirty something to middle aged man in America. In the eighties you'd grow the pony tail as soon as your hair started to fall out, now you just shave your head and grow what you think is a van dyke.
posted by MartinWisse at 1:30 AM on June 9, 2013 [4 favorites]


REAL Lesbians React to Lesbian Porn!

Making a very good point about trimming finger nails in the middle relevant to straight people too.
posted by MartinWisse at 1:31 AM on June 9, 2013


This is bothering me way more than it should, but am I wrong, or did he mis-tally the "winner" a bunch of times?

Believe it or not, Billy on the Street actually is a gameshow, and therefore it's subject to gameshow regulations. One of those regulations is that the "correct" answer must actually be written down, even if the question is completely subjective. (source)
posted by roll truck roll at 2:36 AM on June 9, 2013 [4 favorites]


I'm waiting for the official word from The Blue that I'm not allowed to laugh at this, its stereotyping and "othering".

That said, thanks to whoever linked to the Lesbians Watching Lesbian Porn channel, loads of awesome there...

What do Lesbians Think of Penis? "what does a penis smell like?"......"regret"

What do Gay Guys Think of Vagina? "Not like something you would want for yourself.. but like I bet someone would pay a lot of money for that?"
posted by C.A.S. at 3:25 AM on June 9, 2013




Obvious plants are obvious.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 5:42 AM on June 9, 2013


Obvious plants are obvious

I think it's also possible that we're simply not seeing the (many) people who didn't react 'properly' to the question.
posted by Tomorrowful at 6:53 AM on June 9, 2013


I'm waiting for the official word from The Blue that I'm not allowed to laugh at this, its stereotyping and "othering".

I don't want to fall down an open manhole. I don't want you to fall down an open manhole. I certainly don't think anyone should ever be pushed into an open manhole, or that we as a society should be leaving manholes open, accidentally or as a policy. I'm sure that the consequences of falling into an open manhole are, at best, pretty awful.

But man, it's really hard not to laugh at somebody falling into an open manhole.
posted by mhoye at 7:40 AM on June 9, 2013 [2 favorites]


Obvious plants are obvious

I think it's also possible that we're simply not seeing the (many) people who didn't react 'properly' to the question.


Ra-THER. I am never quite sure how to react when people triumphantly point out that people putting together an entertainment program have omitted the parts that are not entertaining. No flies on them!
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:45 AM on June 9, 2013 [4 favorites]


h-dogg links gold again. Post at eleven.
posted by petebest at 7:52 AM on June 9, 2013


That was such a nice assortment of lesbian types that if I'd watched them for another few minutes I'd have started to convince myself they were all women I knew personally.

That said, I didn't find this especially funny. But that's OK.
posted by not that girl at 8:55 AM on June 9, 2013


now you just shave your head and grow what you think is a van dyke.

No now you just have testosterone replacement therapy and lose all your hair.
posted by The Whelk at 8:58 AM on June 9, 2013


IF THEY RUN EAST AND DOWN A BIT I CAN RECOMMEND A REALLY GOOD TRADITIIONAL AMERICANA PLACE WITH FANCY OLD TIMEY COCKTAILS

The Whelk, you can't say that and just leave us hanging. What is the name of this magical place?
posted by tickingclock at 9:00 AM on June 9, 2013


REAL Lesbians React to Lesbian Porn!
You would think that, between rule 34 and the fact that straight men supposedly love the idea of lesbian sex, the internet would be just awash in free real lesbian porn, but it is ridiculously difficult to find.

And lesbian porn involving Meryl Streep? Forget about it.
posted by evidenceofabsence at 9:10 AM on June 9, 2013


I really wanted to hate this but somehow did not hate this.
posted by Sara C. at 9:15 AM on June 9, 2013


Also my choice of Adam Scott over Ronald Reagan probably means the lesbians are taking away my bi girl card.

(you will get my toaster out of my cold, dead hands, ladies.)
posted by Sara C. at 9:16 AM on June 9, 2013


Tickingclock- Harding's! http://nymag.com/listings/restaurant/hardings/
posted by The Whelk at 9:25 AM on June 9, 2013


I think it's also possible that we're simply not seeing the (many) people who didn't react 'properly' to the question.

Yes. They also go by the same few businesses a bunch of times, and randomly jump locations to a place that would take longer than a few seconds to jog to. This is not one fluid passers-by aggrandizement but probably several hours or a whole day of doing this, with only the good ones in the final piece.
posted by Sara C. at 9:25 AM on June 9, 2013


What is the name of this magical place?

My guess is that The Whelk was going to suggest Old Town Bar on 18th near Union Square. Which is, indeed, a little bit downtown and east from where they are. I've never ordered obscure old cocktails there, but it seems the sort of place. It's one of the oldest continually-operating bars in New York. I always order beer there, but I imagine the bartenders know what they're doing. The food is mediocre, but will do you after a movie at the gigantor megaplex in Union Square or a show at Irving Plaza. It's also a good place to take an internet date because it's cool without being pretentious, has everything, serves food if you want to linger, and has tons of tables and a quieter upstairs room. The crowd is a little Wall Street, though.
posted by Sara C. at 9:30 AM on June 9, 2013 [1 favorite]


No! But that place is also awesome - and the director of Liquid Sky owns a sushi place mearby
posted by The Whelk at 9:38 AM on June 9, 2013 [1 favorite]


What lesbians think of penii.


Read that as "What lesbians think of pernil, and was all, wouldn't they just think it's delicious, like everyone else?
posted by Diablevert at 9:44 AM on June 9, 2013 [4 favorites]


At first I was like why does that one just keep saying Emma Stone and then I looked up Emma Stone. and I was like EMMA STONE. For some reason this reminded me of My Drunk Kitchen exists so now I'm watching that.
posted by edbles at 2:49 PM on June 9, 2013 [1 favorite]


Oh yes, definitely Emma Stone. I had Easy A on the TV yesterday whilst cleaning the house, and she is just adorable. ADORABLE!
posted by blurker at 5:04 PM on June 9, 2013


This is bothering me way more than it should, but am I wrong, or did he mis-tally the "winner" a bunch of times?

This is a big part of Billy Eichner's schtick. He acts as if he's gathering others' opinions but then his answer is the only "right" one.

Personally I find him hysterical. And "lesbians AND JEWS!" was great.

Also he has a running leitmotif of "Meryl Streep is the best actress in the world," and it was quite charming to see him on the same "Watch What Happens" show recently *with* Meryl herself.
posted by DMelanogaster at 5:35 PM on June 9, 2013


(Ooo, who knew there was so much Liquid Sky in the Union Square nabe -- Susan Doukas regularly brings her little dog Benny to the dog park there as well. Thanks for the tip on Harding's.)
posted by ariel_caliban at 6:36 PM on June 9, 2013


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