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June 9, 2013 3:54 PM   Subscribe

OK, let me just take a breath, and say... amazing.

I know for some it's not a big deal when something like this comes out (kids' game show is rigged), but for someone in the vintage computer history biz like myself, it's brilliant work to track everyone down.

See also: Wil Weaton's takedown of G4's "Arena" and why he quit it.
posted by jscott at 4:21 PM on June 9, 2013 [5 favorites]

Your Golden Joystick was sacrificed in the name of great television, kid.

Also Patrick Moore knew bog all about Zelda on the SNES.
posted by Artw at 4:55 PM on June 9, 2013

Oh god, next you'll be telling me Patrick Moore was some right wing nutjob...
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 5:01 PM on June 9, 2013 [1 favorite]

The GamesMaster neural interface Accidentally deleted all of his mind except xylophones and xenophobia.
posted by Artw at 5:06 PM on June 9, 2013

"The thing I was blown away by most was the catering," he says. "They gave me a little sticker that meant I could have as much free food as I wanted. So I had about 12 packets of crisps. It was amazing."

You have to admit, it does sound like 12yo heaven.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:07 PM on June 9, 2013 [3 favorites]

Next exposé will be on how Hypno Disk is now a drunken bum on the streets of Manchester post-Robot Wars.
posted by Artw at 5:08 PM on June 9, 2013 [3 favorites]

Or, you know, hell...
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:10 PM on June 9, 2013

Uncle Ramgdo from The Adventure Game caught exposing himself in a Garden Center outside Leeds.
posted by Artw at 5:16 PM on June 9, 2013 [1 favorite]

Very nice read

But the whole time I found myself thinking, there is really a guy who's last name is Ffinch with 2 Fs?
posted by RustyBrooks at 7:34 PM on June 9, 2013

Crystal Meth Maze.
posted by Artw at 7:46 PM on June 9, 2013

But the whole time I found myself thinking, there is really a guy who's last name is Ffinch with 2 Fs?
'Ff' is a single letter in the Welsh alphabet.
posted by fullerine at 11:25 PM on June 9, 2013 [1 favorite]

Ah sloppy, slightly underproduced live television. Channel 4 did have the greatest programs. I loved this when younger, and I suspect every word of innuendo went flying over my head.
posted by Cannon Fodder at 11:46 PM on June 9, 2013

He's not wrong about Top Gear.
posted by inpHilltr8r at 11:51 PM on June 9, 2013

Arthur Jensen: You have meddled with the primal forces of nature, Mr. Beale, and I won't have it! Is that clear? You think you've merely stopped a business deal. That is not the case! The Arabs have taken billions of dollars out of this country, and now they must put it back! It is ebb and flow, tidal gravity! It is ecological balance! You are an old man who thinks in terms of nations and peoples. There are no nations. There are no peoples. There are no Russians. There are no Arabs. There are no third worlds. There is no West. There is only one holistic system of systems, one vast and immane, interwoven, interacting, multivariate, multinational dominion of dollars. Petro-dollars, electro-dollars, multi-dollars, reichmarks, rins, rubles, pounds, and shekels. It is the international system of currency which determines the totality of life on this planet. That is the natural order of things today. That is the atomic and subatomic and galactic structure of things today! And YOU have meddled with the primal forces of nature, and YOU... WILL... ATONE! Am I getting through to you, Mr. Beale? You get up on your little twenty-one inch screen and howl about America and democracy. There is no America. There is no democracy. There is only IBM, and ITT, and AT&T, and DuPont, Dow, Union Carbide, and Exxon. Those are the nations of the world today. What do you think the Russians talk about in their councils of state, Karl Marx? They get out their linear programming charts, statistical decision theories, minimax solutions, and compute the price-cost probabilities of their transactions and investments, just like we do. We no longer live in a world of nations and ideologies, Mr. Beale. The world is a college of corporations, inexorably determined by the immutable bylaws of business. The world is a business, Mr. Beale. It has been since man crawled out of the slime. And our children will live, Mr. Beale, to see that... perfect world... in which there's no war or famine, oppression or brutality. One vast and ecumenical holding company, for whom all men will work to serve a common profit, in which all men will hold a share of stock. All necessities provided, all anxieties tranquilized, all boredom amused. And I have chosen you, Mr. Beale, to preach this evangel.
Howard Beale: Why me?
Arthur Jensen: Because you're on television, dummy. Sixty million people watch you every night of the week, Monday through Friday.
Howard Beale: I have seen the face of God.
Arthur Jensen: You just might be right, Mr. Beale.
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 1:53 AM on June 10, 2013 [1 favorite]

The site appears to be down.
posted by Goofyy at 3:28 AM on June 10, 2013

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