Earning the Title "World's Ugliest Animal"
September 12, 2013 1:10 PM   Subscribe

 
Boing!
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish at 1:13 PM on September 12, 2013 [4 favorites]


Came in to disagree, but left agreeing.
posted by blue_beetle at 1:14 PM on September 12, 2013 [3 favorites]


Blobfish are often caught as bycatch in bottom trawling nets. Scientists now fear the blobfish could become an endangered species because of deep-ocean trawling.[3][4]

Geez, it would be great to somehow ban bottom trawling.
posted by KokuRyu at 1:15 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


There's an additional punchline here.
posted by McCoy Pauley at 1:17 PM on September 12, 2013 [2 favorites]


Yet another thing for Ziggy to be upset about.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 1:21 PM on September 12, 2013 [2 favorites]


How on earth is the adorable axolotl even in consideration for ugliest?!
posted by phunniemee at 1:21 PM on September 12, 2013 [19 favorites]


That drawing on the wikipedia page REALLY DOESN'T DO THE BLOBFISH JUSTICE WHOOOOAAAAA UGLY NELLY
posted by blue t-shirt at 1:26 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


The blobfish is the subject of Patricia Piccinini's wonderful sculpture eulogy

This sculpture is a celebration of the simple, gormless, wonderful existence of the blobfish. It is a eulogy for this particular specimen, supported in death by a very ordinary looking man. Perhaps he is one of the millions of ordinary people who neither know nor care much about the fate of the blobfish. Even so he seems genuinely moved by the fate of this unprepossessing fish. There is hope in that.
posted by leibniz at 1:27 PM on September 12, 2013 [5 favorites]


Reminds me of Rastapopoulos.
posted by Namlit at 1:30 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


In related news, the bobbit worm has been named the mascot of the Kind of Pretty Actually But OH MY GOD NO THE HORROR Animal Preservation society.
posted by brundlefly at 1:30 PM on September 12, 2013 [4 favorites]


Blobfish seem to grow only to about 12 inches, about as long as a comic book.

Thanks for explaining "inches" in terms of simple, standardized units I can understand, like comic books.
posted by Wolfdog at 1:39 PM on September 12, 2013 [19 favorites]


Wolfdog: "Thanks for explaining "inches" in terms of simple, standardized units I can understand, like comic books."

Or about 2 grapefruit. Or is that only a unit of measurement for tumors and hailstones?
posted by brundlefly at 1:41 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


In related news, the bobbit worm has been named the mascot of the Kind of Pretty Actually But OH MY GOD NO THE HORROR Animal Preservation society.

Holy Christ. If one of those showed up in my aquarium, I would burn down the fucking house.
posted by mr_roboto at 1:44 PM on September 12, 2013


grapefruit for round things, comic books for long things, bobbit worms for evil things which lurk beneath us

It's a perfectly intuitive system of measurements
posted by ook at 1:47 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


Boing!
posted by Holy Zarquon's Singing Fish


I was concerned that by boing, you meant the boner noise popular with radio morning show hosts and that by clicking on the link I was going to see a really distressing example of rule 34...
posted by 445supermag at 1:49 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


(incidentally and apropos of nothing except that octopuses are awesome the bit towards the end of that bobbit worm video where the bobbit worm tries to take down an octopus and then the octopus just nonchalantly pulls itself back up out of the ground and swims away is awesome because octopuses are awesome)
posted by ook at 1:51 PM on September 12, 2013 [2 favorites]


I don't know, I think the blobfish is kind of cute. It looks like Ziggy. There must be uglier animals out there.
posted by orange swan at 1:52 PM on September 12, 2013


I think the blobfish is probably a pretty normal looking fish until you bring them to the surface to take a photo. You'd look pretty ugly too after undergoing massive uncontrolled decompression of your entire body I'm guessing
posted by ook at 1:54 PM on September 12, 2013 [2 favorites]


I like blobfish. They're very involved in the arts.
posted by orme at 1:55 PM on September 12, 2013 [3 favorites]


Or about 2 grapefruit. Or is that only a unit of measurement for tumors and hailstones?

1/211200 Rhode Islands.
posted by Slap*Happy at 2:02 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


No bloblem.
posted by redyaky at 2:02 PM on September 12, 2013


Blobfish seem to grow only to about 12 inches, about as long as a comic book.

Blobfish seem to grow only to about 12 inches, about as long as a child's wooden ruler.
Blobfish seem to grow only to about 12 inches, about as long as one of your American five dollar footlong sandwiches.
Blobfish seem to grow only to about 12 inches, about as long as two half-sized blobfish laid end-to-end.
posted by Atom Eyes at 2:17 PM on September 12, 2013 [17 favorites]


Boing!
ZOOOOOM!

Ding!
posted by byanyothername at 2:19 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


The only cure is the Potoo. This one is now the lock screen of my phone.
posted by jquinby at 2:22 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


I would have gone with 'HUMANS'
posted by spicynuts at 2:24 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


On the measurements derail: around these parts we go with "golf ball" or "baseball" to measure hailstones. Perhaps we think of hail in a sporty kind of way, as opposed to nutritious tangy goodness.

But if you want ugly...does this qualify? (warning: Westboro trigger).
posted by datawrangler at 2:36 PM on September 12, 2013


Al Molinaro, deboned.
posted by pracowity at 3:02 PM on September 12, 2013


The only cure is the Potoo.

Holy crap it's like Allie Brosh invented an owl
posted by NMcCoy at 3:17 PM on September 12, 2013 [5 favorites]


A woman walks into a bar with her pet blobfish...
posted by edeezy at 3:57 PM on September 12, 2013


If those things ever evolve the ability to crawl out of the ocean and club crabs to death, I feel there could be a potential role for them as future galactic bureaucrats and creators of truly horrendous poetry.
posted by walrus at 5:00 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


If those things ever evolve the ability to crawl out of the ocean and club crabs to death...
posted by walrus at 7:00 PM on September 12 [+] [!] [quote]


Eponysterical!
posted by jquinby at 5:06 PM on September 12, 2013


How on earth is the adorable axolotl even in consideration for ugliest?!

I would also like to raise objections to placing the adorable kakapo in that list.
posted by Alnedra at 6:23 PM on September 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


I'm not sure what it says about me that my browser indicates I'd already been to the Wikipedia entry for blobfish.
posted by nev at 6:38 PM on September 12, 2013


I figured goblin shark would have had this one in the bag.
posted by 23 at 7:33 PM on September 12, 2013 [3 favorites]


> There must be uglier animals out there.

How about this baby shoggoth?
posted by jfuller at 8:13 PM on September 12, 2013


Blobfish says: "Fuck Off, we're full" stickers is my next business venture.
posted by Mezentian at 9:07 AM on September 13, 2013


Blobfish seem to grow only to about 12 inches, or about as long as a dozen sequential inches.
posted by blue_beetle at 9:25 AM on September 13, 2013 [1 favorite]


This is killing me. The blobfish looks EXACTLY like an old Don Martin cartoon about a guy working in a fish market cutting the heads of the fishes, and then amusing himself when one is smiling instead of frowning. I remember every panel of it but for the life of me can't find it online.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 10:19 PM on September 13, 2013


For XQUZYPHYR.
posted by jfuller at 1:11 PM on September 14, 2013 [3 favorites]


OMG yes you are the best person.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 10:16 AM on September 15, 2013


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