Thinking beyond "The Seven"

November 2, 2013 10:29 AM

George Carlin's "Seven Dirty Words" routine debuted in 1972 and led to a landmark obscenity case at the Supreme Court. What many people don't know is that ten years later, he decided to expand the list (written list here). There was even a viewer-contributed list on his website that was 2,443 words long. Sadly, this list has evaporated on the site, but the Wayback Machine provides an alternate (which is helpfully categorized). Finally, Stephen Colbert and Hugh Laurie recently kept the recitation-of-dirty-words tradition alive by reading some verboten language that the four networks are currently lobbying the FCC permission to use. (NSFW, natch)
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI (29 comments total)

I just want to say that as a kid growing up without internet access, the 7 dirty words were the most frustrating thing ever, since people would talk about them all the time, but nobody would tell me what they were. Especially annoying was the BBS where the sysop used that for the standard for what was and wasn't acceptable, and he basically just told me to guess when I asked him what the actual words were.
posted by ckape at 10:37 AM on November 2, 2013 [6 favorites]

My mom bought me a copy of the LP of Class Clown when I was 15 or 16. She was pretty much the coolest.
posted by octothorpe at 10:43 AM on November 2, 2013 [3 favorites]

When I was a young teen, my best friend's old brother had some George Carlin and Cheech & Chong records that we listened to and laughed at over and over, exposing us to plenty of "bad" language. It didn't fuckin' hurt us any, goddammit!
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:45 AM on November 2, 2013 [5 favorites]

Oh, and -

Metafilter: Thumb in butt.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:45 AM on November 2, 2013 [2 favorites]

Seeking: gif of Hugh Laurie saying "balls" from that last clip.

Come on Internet, you can do it!
posted by idiopath at 10:50 AM on November 2, 2013

How times have changed.
posted by L'Estrange Fruit at 10:59 AM on November 2, 2013 [2 favorites]

No "I swear by The Seven" jokes?
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 12:02 PM on November 2, 2013

The full list from Carlin at Carnegie won't be lost as long as Matt from my childhood neighborhood is still alive. He memorized the whole thing. It was the first time in my 11 years on the planet I'd heard a number of phrases, most memorably, "Beating the Bishop".
posted by yerfatma at 12:03 PM on November 2, 2013

When my wife is having a particularly rueful day at work, I'll get texts that just say, "Shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker tits. SHIT PISS FUCK CUNT COCKSUCKER MOTHERFUCKER TITS!"
posted by notsnot at 12:04 PM on November 2, 2013 [10 favorites]

If "fuck" and "motherfucker" are separate banned words, is "pigfucker" OK?
posted by aaronetc at 12:28 PM on November 2, 2013 [1 favorite]

aaronetc: " is "pigfucker" OK?"

Sure, go nuts.
posted by notsnot at 12:49 PM on November 2, 2013 [2 favorites]

I would love to work for a law firm called Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, Cocksucker, Motherfucker and Tits.

And which one am I?
posted by Grangousier at 12:49 PM on November 2, 2013 [2 favorites]

I listened to the LP many times in my misspent youth. Much if it has faded away, but I remember well the aside, "Turd you can say, but who wants to?"
posted by ricochet biscuit at 1:01 PM on November 2, 2013 [1 favorite]

I hear Carlin's voice and laugh a little when I think of: Mongolian Clusterfuck
posted by Ber at 1:09 PM on November 2, 2013

"Turd you can say, but who wants to?"

Oh, I don't know. There's been times that swears sotto voice would have been a give-away, but "turd" or "turdbucket" was just off-beat enough not to be obvious, and quite satisfying.
posted by BlueHorse at 1:24 PM on November 2, 2013

I hear Carlin's voice and laugh a little when I think of: Mongolian Clusterfuck.

One of the reasons I love Carlin so much was his recognition that it was sometimes the structure and sound of the words that were more important than the meaning. That first clip goes a bit into this when he describes how the seven grouping is robbed of its power when one is removed.

And, yes, "Mongolian ClusterfucK" just rolls off the tongue beautifully and is so satisfying to say. It's poetry, dammit!
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI at 1:49 PM on November 2, 2013

"And 'tits' doesn't even belong on the list!! It's such a friendly sounding word, y'know? Sounds like a nickname: 'Hey, Tits, come here. Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits; Tits, Toots.'

It sounds like a snack, doesn't it? Yes, yes, I know; but I don't mean your sexist snack, I mean New Nabisco Tits: Cheese Tits - Corn Tits - Pizza Tits...Tater Tits. Betcha can't eat just one! That's true, I usually switch off...."
posted by Greg_Ace at 2:26 PM on November 2, 2013 [7 favorites]

Heeeey, these things are responding...
posted by Windopaene at 2:51 PM on November 2, 2013

Hell, they've sold Nabisco Cheese Nips forever - iNabisco Tits seems like a natural brand extension...
posted by jkosmicki at 3:24 PM on November 2, 2013 [1 favorite]

I'll never forget the first time I hear someone say "ass" on prime-time network TV.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 3:26 PM on November 2, 2013

One of my favorite Fry & Laurie bits is the one on swearwords. PEMHOLE. PEPSLIDER! (gasp, faint)

That bit has almost inspired me to start making up curse words to use in day-to-day life, just to have fun with it. It was pointed out to me that this makes you sound like the kind of person who says "dang," or "heck." It might, but fraugcramit, I'm bored with the Old Standbys. Is fuck really such a bad thing anymore? Anyway, I think (hope) it's more how you say them than the words themselves, when it comes to expressing strong emotion or feeling.
posted by JHarris at 6:07 PM on November 2, 2013 [1 favorite]

That bit has almost inspired me to start making up curse words to use in day-to-day life, just to have fun with it.

My two new favorites are "turkeynipples" and "bootspats." "Bootspats" is particularly fun with a German accent.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 6:10 PM on November 2, 2013 [2 favorites]

Das ist böötschpatz!! Du bist ein pimhole!
posted by Greg_Ace at 7:13 PM on November 2, 2013 [2 favorites]

okay I just started watching the colbert clip and i think we are all missing the most important thing revealed which is THERE'S A REALITY SHOW CALLED THE MAN WITH THE 150-LB SCROTUM
posted by JHarris at 11:08 PM on November 2, 2013

Found it. Hugh Laurie saying "balls".
posted by idiopath at 11:47 PM on November 2, 2013 [1 favorite]

I don't really give a f...
Words never killed anyone
Seven deadly people, now keep them from being broadcast.
posted by manoffewwords at 1:14 AM on November 3, 2013

If Rep. Doug Ose had his way, the list would be "`shit', `piss', `fuck', `cunt', `asshole', and the phrases `cock sucker', `mother fucker', and `ass hole', compound use (including hyphenated compounds) of such words and phrases with each other or with other words or phrases, and other grammatical forms of such words and phrases (including verb, adjective, gerund, participle, and infinitive forms).'."
posted by MrMoonPie at 9:58 AM on November 3, 2013

It's interesting how we've changed in what's allowed too. This photo from 1940 by Whitey Schafer summed up all the things that weren't allowed in films at the time.
posted by Margalo Epps at 11:09 AM on November 3, 2013 [1 favorite]

"In 1940 Paramount photographer Whitey Schafer staged a sinful still life entitled "Thou Shalt Not," a sly depiction of what the Production Code Administration censored out of Hollywood’s official publicity shots. The forbidden images include: (1) the law defeated; (2) the inside of a thigh; (3) lace lingerie; (4) a dead man; (5) narcotics; (6) drinking; (7) an exposed bosom; (8) gambling; (9) pointing a gun; and (10) a tommy gun."

*Thinks hard, looking at picture* And, um, Feminism?
posted by glasseyes at 9:35 PM on November 3, 2013