Krampus: Saint Nicholas' Dark Companion
December 3, 2013 9:08 PM   Subscribe

While Saint Nicholas may bring gifts to good boys and girls, ancient folklore in Europe's Alpine region also tells of Krampus, a frightening beast-like creature who emerges during the Yule season, looking for naughty children to punish in horrible ways -- or possibly to drag back to his lair in a sack.

In keeping with pre-Germanic Pagan traditions, men dressed as these demons have been frightening children on Krampusnacht for centuries, chasing them and hitting them with sticks, on an (often alcohol-fueled) run through the dark streets.

He also has his own web page where schwag can be had for a price. Videos are just a click away
posted by JujuB (42 comments total) 24 users marked this as a favorite
 
This is awesome.
posted by parki at 9:24 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Elf on the Shelf is gaslighting bullshit for helicopter parents who never want to let their precious darlings out of their tightly-controlled parental Matrix simulacrum.

Krampus, on the other hand, will cause children to question the fundamental nature of good and evil, seeing them either as two sides of the same coin, or as the same side of a 1-dimensional coin caught in an eternal flip.
posted by Strange Interlude at 9:29 PM on December 3, 2013 [19 favorites]


My father and mother are German, I'm first-generation, and we grew up being threatened by the Krampus and other assorted German boogie monsters. I think my dad even had this terrifying puppet of him? I still remember asking other kids in elementary school in New York, "Wait a minute...coal? You get presents, maybe, but your only punishment is...coal? But what about the Krampus, and how he will kidnap you and stuff you in his sack and eat you? For being bad?". And then thinking it was just one more example of how American children had it SO EASY GOD they don't even have to worry about getting kidnapped and eaten by a Christmas demon.
posted by stellaluna at 9:35 PM on December 3, 2013 [45 favorites]


Better be good!
posted by rue72 at 9:36 PM on December 3, 2013 [4 favorites]


This is so much better than blackface.
posted by monospace at 9:37 PM on December 3, 2013 [6 favorites]


Previously.
posted by Decani at 9:40 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Krampus reminds me of my Grampas, one in particular, (often alcohol-fueled at Christmastime).
posted by islander at 9:43 PM on December 3, 2013 [3 favorites]


I sent Krampus cards this year because Christmas cards are lame.

I sent one to my sister pointing out I was the good child then one to my mom telling her she needed to tell my sister to take the warning seriously or Krampus would get her.
posted by Ghostride The Whip at 9:49 PM on December 3, 2013 [6 favorites]


Yay! I'm performing with Krampus LA Troupe this year, doing an obscure regional offshoot - the Schabmann (Schabfrau?). I'm excited about the prospect of kids actually getting scared about being naughty again. I remember some shift when I was a child where it was considered cruel to give a kid coal even if he was a complete suck the whole year. Coal? Kid, this year you're getting whipped, put in chains, and thrown in a basket.
posted by queensissy at 9:53 PM on December 3, 2013 [3 favorites]


Oh if you want to send your own, I'll say that these were the ones I used and hilariously awesome. The tin is also excellent.

Specifically, I sent this one to my sister with arrows indicating "me" and "you" as appropriate.
posted by Ghostride The Whip at 9:56 PM on December 3, 2013 [4 favorites]


Oh man why didn't I think of Krampuskarten! What a great idea. My sisters are going to kill me. "Why would you do this to us we worked so hard to put those dark years behind us" and all.
posted by stellaluna at 10:38 PM on December 3, 2013 [4 favorites]


Closely related: Krampus's cousin, Frau Perchta.
posted by scody at 10:49 PM on December 3, 2013 [4 favorites]


my hometown is working on transplanting it.
posted by mwhybark at 11:40 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


I am wearing my Krampus shirt RIGHT NOW. I have been leering at the kids at work all day.
posted by a humble nudibranch at 11:40 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


So Krampus is sort of like the Ice Cream Bunny, but less terrifying?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 11:52 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Back in socialist Hungary (circa 1976), funnily enough, workplaces put on Saint Nicolas (Father Winter, a completely secular geezer!) shows, with an unfortunate worker having to dress up and distribute small packs of sweets to the other workers' kids. My father, a bit of a dissident by then and quite a bit of a nutter, took to the task with gusto at the Institute of Higher Education Research, where he had a fake job, and promised to take me along as his Krampus sidekick. But on the day, I was running quite a high temperature with the flu. So he took me anyway. The proceedings were a success as each child shuffled onto a stage, got a little friendly chat from Santa, a little menacing from Krampus, and left. Then, near the end, my dad, somewhat carried away, proclaimed: "You all should be particularly proud of this Krampus, who is really quite sick and infectious and has a temperature, but is still doing his job so well!" I was eight and cross-eyed with fever, but I could still feel the massive wave of hostility that swept us from the parents sitting in the audience. Though this had little to do with it, my dad emigrated to the UK a few years later.

Ten years on, having fallen on hard times, he got a job as a mall Father Christmas. He got fired the first day, for telling a particularly obnoxious child, who was trying to pull his beard off, to "fuck right off!".

Dear old dad! :D
posted by holist at 12:04 AM on December 4, 2013 [22 favorites]


I've been a lurker here for some time, and I feel the need to jump in and comment because this is near and dear to my little black heart. I have been a fan for years and years of this misbegotten, murderous monster. So much so that I make Killer Krampus figures, complete with a Mischief Maker, chains and a bundle of sticks to thrash and punish... Just thought you all should know. I <3 the Krampus.
posted by Mr.Krotpong at 12:21 AM on December 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


I think I am Krampus. That would explain why I started growling at the first hear of EZ listen Christmas Carols at Rite Aid yesterday.
posted by angrycat at 4:40 AM on December 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


Some folks in Ypsilanti had a Krampus Costume Ball a few years back, complete with parade through the streets at midnight.

The tradition apparently continues.
posted by Roger Dodger at 6:03 AM on December 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


Yay! I'm performing with Krampus LA Troupe this year, doing an obscure regional offshoot - the Schabmann (Schabfrau?).

Oh, wow! That looks like so much fun! And your masks are absolutely amazing; they're like something designed by Maurice Sendak's evil twin. Bookmarked for much later perusal, and as fodder to try to get something similar started on a much smaller scale in our area. It would have to latch on to some other existing festival, but it would still be pretty awesome.

I've been trying to get in touch with my previously-unfamiliar German heritage, and I was so hoping to find roots in a Krampus-loving area. But, apparently my Swabian ancestors were more fond of some character named Klos, whoever he is when he's at home. I can't seem to find much information on him, so he must be pretty dull.

My favorite Krampus images are the ones that show him tempting young ladies to certain ruination. He's probably going to marry them against their wills. Against their wills, Papa!
posted by The Underpants Monster at 6:17 AM on December 4, 2013 [8 favorites]


Krampus and Gilbert and Sullivan references in the same thread?! This is unprecedented.

I feel like Oprah now: You get a favorite and you get a favorite and YOU GET A FAVORITE EVERYONE HERE IS GOING HOME WITH A FAVORITE TODAY!
posted by misha at 6:31 AM on December 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


The photos in the Atlantic article are great: I especially liked this one.

Movie idea: Claus v. Krampus, loosely based, perhaps on Alien v. Predator; an epic 3D yuletide fight to the death starring Schwarzenegger as Claus and a CGI Krampus voiced by Christoph Waltz.
posted by misteraitch at 6:43 AM on December 4, 2013 [6 favorites]


My favorite Krampuskarten are the ones that show the Krampus and St. Nick in cahoots. Like this one--smug bastards--or this one, driving in a motorcycle and sidecar LIKE A BOSS.
posted by Cash4Lead at 7:19 AM on December 4, 2013 [4 favorites]


Movie idea: Claus v. Krampus, loosely based, perhaps on Alien v. Predator; an epic 3D yuletide fight to the death starring Schwarzenegger as Claus and a CGI Krampus voiced by Christoph Waltz.

SInce someone else mentioned it, if y'all want Santa vs Krampus. may I suggest The Long Yuletide War short stories I've been working on. Starring Perchta Belly-Slitter as well.

Dec 5th is Krampusnacht, and a new story should be up and out of the editing shop by then.
posted by Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey at 7:21 AM on December 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


I am reminded of Six to Eight Black Men.
Does Krampus take the bad kids to Spain?
posted by MtDewd at 7:23 AM on December 4, 2013 [2 favorites]


"On The Prowl:
The Krampus is to Salzburg what the bull is to Pamplona, an oversized beast that sends an adrenaline rush of terror through the cobblestone streets of the old town, all in the name of cultural heritage. For a full week during the start of the holiday season, scores of Krampuses stalk the cobbled ways of Salzburg and its surrounding villages. The Krampus is a hybrid-beast of pagan origins that has been affixed to the Christmas season and looks like he stepped out of the pages of Maurice Sendak's "Where the Wild Things Are." Only instead of inviting young boys for midnight monster romps, they stalk young women, fondling them, throwing them over their shoulders and whipping them with wooden switches until their shins and thighs are black and blue. They prowl the streets, wander onto public buses, and storm downtown restaurants where, after assaulting female patrons, they are treated to free schnapps to fuel their further fury. The anonymity provided by the Krampus mask combined with increasing amounts of alcohol consumption is not only feeding the violence but also a debate about this bizarre pagan holdover from a less civilized era.
A buddy of mine (RIP) who grew up in Austria wold regale me w stories of the annual Krampuslauf. "Pirate," Ziggy would say, "Ze Krampusses, zey vould run through ze street wis dried cow-tails, and zey vould beat you vis zem! I steel have ze scars on my shins!"

Thing about the dried cow-tails, birch-rods, etc; the beatings are not as punishment for sins, but to "awaken the life force". There are agrarian traditions all over central Europe where the farmers go out into the fields and beat the trees around New Years/Solstice. This is the source of "Birthday spankings" as a tradition. The Roman "Lupercalia" was another ritual that involved whipping to increase fertility

This is so much better than blackface

Umm.... along with horns (symbol of divine origins), a furry coat, a long tongue, and a huge, phallic club, hump back, a black face is one of the traditional symbols of "The Wild Man" (of which Krampus is one incarnation). He was a shaman-like creature that came at the end of the year to preside of the holiday feasting/orgy (again, that wakening the life-force). It was only in the 9th(?) century that Pope [NAME] declared "No more holiday orgies for y'all, you're Christian now!"

And suddenly all the attributes of the pagan orgy-god (horns, etc) are those associated with the Devil. And now he's chained to St. Nicholas' (whose Catholic feast day is Dec 6th) as the bad guy.

Not looking to start a "Zwarte Piet" derail, but just saying that the Wild Man had a black face for quite some time before the Dutch made him a Moorish sidekick to Sinterklaas. I recommend the book Santa Claus: Last of the Wild Men
posted by Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey at 7:40 AM on December 4, 2013 [10 favorites]


As Elvis is my witness, I someday want to go to Austria, attend a Krampuslauf, and get physically hurled down the town's main drag and beaten with sticks by Christmas monsters, while drunk.

TRADITION!
posted by Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey at 7:51 AM on December 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


My kid just found out about Krampus this year and is SO EXCITED (he's never been much on Santa; his other favorite people include Darth Vader and the Grim Reaper, so you can see a theme here).

Anyway, we got him this Krampus shirt for Christmas. It'll be too big since there are no kid sizes, but he'll love it.
posted by emjaybee at 8:07 AM on December 4, 2013


they stalk young women, fondling them, throwing them over their shoulders and whipping them with wooden switches until their shins and thighs are black and blue. They prowl the streets, wander onto public buses, and storm downtown restaurants where, after assaulting female patrons, they are treated to free schnapps to fuel their further fury.

Can we skip this part though.
posted by emjaybee at 8:13 AM on December 4, 2013


Christmas monsters

So, Christmansters?
posted by The Underpants Monster at 8:24 AM on December 4, 2013 [1 favorite]


That's my point, Pirate. Obviously Zwarte Piet is a direct descendant of Krampus, but it's a shame the Dutch went for the ugly racist stereotypes instead of these awe-inspiring mythical creatures.
posted by monospace at 8:34 AM on December 4, 2013


Krampus LA?! Oh man, do I ever want to do this, if I can get a costume together in time.
posted by culfinglin at 9:11 AM on December 4, 2013


So this isn't just something that Taco came up while hitting the guest bong.
posted by Apocryphon at 9:41 AM on December 4, 2013


For the three people who are going to get this reference allow me to bellow

"...what is this? CHRISTMAS DEMON!"
posted by The Whelk at 9:56 AM on December 4, 2013 [1 favorite]




Krampus makes an appearance in the [excellent] arcade game Carnevil.

I'll stuff your stocking!
posted by gottabefunky at 10:37 AM on December 4, 2013


It behooves me to link to this, if only because the Polish maiden is played by my friend, and it's Krampus-based.
posted by Aubergine at 10:42 AM on December 4, 2013 [3 favorites]


OMFG, that was awesome.
posted by Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey at 10:59 AM on December 4, 2013


A friend of mine from Graz has fond childhood memories of hanging out near malls with friends, baiting and bothering the krampusses hired by the mall.
The fact that the krampus would chase them and, if it caught them, beat them quite soundly was the part that made it fun, according to her.
posted by Omnomnom at 1:50 PM on December 4, 2013 [5 favorites]


As promised (or at least hinted at), a new TLYW story for Krampusnacht.

Gruß vom Krampus! (possibly NSFW)
posted by Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey at 1:25 PM on December 5, 2013


I saw the Krampus when I was in Munich during Christmas several years ago I was inspired to put my own costume together this year. It helped that I used to work at a costume rental company back in the 80's Oakland art murmur I am in a traditional Krampus outfit, and my friend is in his interpretation of a Basajuan.
posted by boilermonster at 9:33 AM on December 11, 2013


The Truth About Krampus
posted by homunculus at 7:32 PM on December 13, 2013 [1 favorite]


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