Hands down, the best possible use of fire ants
December 11, 2013 5:41 PM   Subscribe

A Louisiana fire ant colony and 18 pounds of molten aluminum -- two great tastes that taste AWESOME together. Brought to you by the good folks at Anthill Art.
posted by KathrynT (86 comments total) 17 users marked this as a favorite
 
Well, I don't hate ants so my first thought was "10,000 ants were harmed in the making of this video"
posted by danny the boy at 5:53 PM on December 11, 2013 [25 favorites]


Fire ant colonies look like Christmas trees. How festive.
posted by louche mustachio at 5:53 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


Kinda pales next to Previously, but hey, maybe less death is better.
posted by Sys Rq at 5:53 PM on December 11, 2013


i wanna be the guy to hose it off.
posted by mullacc at 5:54 PM on December 11, 2013 [6 favorites]


:) it is cast
posted by Alexsandra at 5:57 PM on December 11, 2013


Millions of ant voices cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

Result is pretty, though.
posted by jokeefe at 6:00 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


I don't hate ants

Accidentally stick your hand in a nest of fire ants and you will quickly change your mind.
posted by louche mustachio at 6:01 PM on December 11, 2013 [29 favorites]


Current bid is $1000. Pretty, but out of my price range.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:01 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


This kills the fire ant.
posted by awenner at 6:02 PM on December 11, 2013 [2 favorites]


This was interesting, because I don't doubt I would slap some fire ants on me, or eradicate them from my yard, if I had a yard.

Yet, yet, this linked piece makes me feel queasy.
posted by sandettie light vessel automatic at 6:03 PM on December 11, 2013 [13 favorites]


louche mustachio: "Accidentally stick your hand in a nest of fire ants and you will quickly change your mind."

I suppose my position is informed by having carefully crafted a lifestyle in which this is not a possibility.
posted by danny the boy at 6:04 PM on December 11, 2013 [30 favorites]


I'm a little more impressed that he didn't seem to hit any big rocks or tree roots, with the aluminum or the shovel.

Fire ants are invasive and fairly unpleasant to be around. I'm OK with eradicating them from a yard where children or pets (or I) may encounter them. Even Mother Earth News has articles on getting rid of them.
posted by jquinby at 6:07 PM on December 11, 2013 [3 favorites]


This reminds me... how come nobody's remade SimAnt for iOS or the like yet?
posted by SansPoint at 6:10 PM on December 11, 2013 [11 favorites]


a lifestyle in which this is not a possibility

So which is it, Iceland or Antarctica?
posted by localroger at 6:12 PM on December 11, 2013 [2 favorites]




I suppose my position is informed by having carefully crafted a lifestyle in which this is not a possibility.

That is wise. Keep doing that. Definitely do not climb a beautiful spreading live oak overhanging a river in Victoria Texas, and definitely definitely do not put your hand on that clump of ball moss.

Interesting fact! Falling in a river will not make the ants let go.
posted by louche mustachio at 6:13 PM on December 11, 2013 [63 favorites]


Interesting fact, fire ants actually come from the plane of elemental fire and are unharmed by molten metal attacks.
posted by Wolfdog at 6:15 PM on December 11, 2013 [33 favorites]


My favourite bit is at 2:03 where the 8 foot tall Emperor Ant, realising that his colony is in immediate peril, emerges from the dirt with a mighty 'rwoaaghh!' and bites the guy's head off.
posted by popcassady at 6:22 PM on December 11, 2013 [7 favorites]


So I sneer at you fire-ant-habitat-dwellers until I look at this map and especially this part of it and that sneer dies on my face. Right up to my house, apparently. I strongly support the burning-out of these bastards with however much aluminum is necessary.

Not too fond of carpenter ants, either. Every other year I find one or two, which sets off a panic of poking around odd corners of the basement looking for their frass. I have a friend who found them behind a wall, which was rippling under the paint. When he opened it, there was no wall, just a solid heaving mass of the sons of bitches. Most of the house was lost. [Shudder].
posted by Fnarf at 6:25 PM on December 11, 2013 [7 favorites]


My favourite bit is at 2:03 where the 8 foot tall Emperor Ant, realising that his colony is in immediate peril, emerges from the dirt with a mighty 'rwoaaghh!' and bites the guy's head off.

You clearly know nothing about ants. That is an 8 foot tall Empress Ant.
posted by Tsuga at 6:26 PM on December 11, 2013 [10 favorites]


awenner: "This kills the fire ant"

Nah, fire elemental creatures should be immune to heat based attacks, so they're probably fine.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 6:27 PM on December 11, 2013 [5 favorites]


On sale in an artist's stall at the main bazaar of Myrmidia, the subterranean city of the Giant Ant-men: sculptures made by pumping molten aluminum up into human colonies.
posted by XMLicious at 6:29 PM on December 11, 2013 [3 favorites]


On sale in an artist's stall at the main bazaar of Myrmidia, the subterranean city of the Giant Ant-men: sculptures made by pumping molten aluminum up into human colonies.

Pompeii as an ant art project makes all kinds of sense.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:32 PM on December 11, 2013 [10 favorites]


Volcanoes as the gods of fire ants makes all kind of sense.
posted by localroger at 6:35 PM on December 11, 2013 [5 favorites]


Curses, foiled again!
posted by hal9k at 6:37 PM on December 11, 2013 [9 favorites]


I *do* hate fire ants, and they legitimately freak me the hell out -- as an Illinois resident, it's because I drove to my mom's house in rural east Texas and forgot an apple core in my car for a couple of days, and when I went to pack my stuff back into my car to drive back to civilisation, I found an infestation IN MY CAR OH MY GOD THEY ARE IN MY CAR HELP HELP HELP -- but I have to say my first reaction was a horrified "oh no, they're boiling the poor ants alive."

It was an interesting structure once it was complete, and I'm sure etymologists can do something with it, and god knows I don't want those little bastards to bite me or OMG INFEST MY CAR OMG *FIRE ANTS* IN MY **CAR** again (I have a can of fire ant killer in my car to this day, and that apple core event was like 7 years ago and trust me, I will never ever do that again), but... it does make me feel a little ooky. I guess I can be pro-evil-fire-ant murder and ooky at the same time, but still, ooky.

(Poor little ordinary brown and black ants. I never appreciated you for the harmless, friendly little guys you were when I was growing up, and now we have all these psychotic ants. I miss you harmless little no-drama guys, even if you do crawl over all the peonies known to mankind.)
posted by sldownard at 6:46 PM on December 11, 2013 [11 favorites]


Thanks for the nice art, ants. Thants.
posted by AndyP at 6:48 PM on December 11, 2013 [7 favorites]


Surely there are easier ways to deal with an infestation of fire ants?
posted by Flashman at 6:49 PM on December 11, 2013


Surely there are easier ways to deal with an infestation of fire ants?

Not that sell for $1000 a pop on Ebay, no.
posted by Fnarf at 6:53 PM on December 11, 2013 [7 favorites]


And now I will have nightmares about the survivors, unstompable fire ants in aluminum armor.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 6:54 PM on December 11, 2013 [16 favorites]


I'm from New Orleans and I say we kill em all!
posted by Ghostride The Whip at 7:03 PM on December 11, 2013 [6 favorites]


Surely there are easier ways to deal with an infestation of fire ants?

Not that sell for $1000 a pop on Ebay, no.


Can I interest sir in our new line of solid-gold roach motels?
posted by rory at 7:04 PM on December 11, 2013 [9 favorites]


Weapon X: ant edition
posted by 2bucksplus at 7:04 PM on December 11, 2013


OK, this seems awesome, but won't the survivors breed and pass on their resistance to molten aluminum and then we'll end up with an entire new species of molten aluminum-resistant fire ants? What then?

I, for one, will welcome our new molten-aluminum-resistant insect overlords.
posted by Cookiebastard at 7:10 PM on December 11, 2013 [4 favorites]


won't the survivors breed and pass on their resistance to molten aluminum

If it smokes the queen none of the others can breed. If the queen is resistant to molten aluminum, it's back to Amdro.
posted by localroger at 7:19 PM on December 11, 2013


Here's another good video of this sort of thing.
posted by A Bad Catholic at 7:25 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


"Poor little ordinary brown and black ants. I never appreciated you for the harmless, friendly little guys you were when I was growing up, and now we have all these psychotic ants. I miss you harmless little no-drama guys, even if you do crawl over all the peonies known to mankind."

Yeah, regular ants are pretty awesome. Fire ants are OF THE DEVIL.

I was surprised that they are as small as they are. And I was also surprised that individual stings weren't that painful. So, at that point, I was all like, gee, I guess people really exaggerated that whole fire ant thing, huh?

Okay. Later, after they had a couple of thirty foot long foraging lines snaking into my home, and I inadvertently agitated about a hundred of them when I picked up my cat's food dish out of bewilderment at her crying for food when she had a full dish, and they immediately swarmed toward my hand, every goddam one of them, I changed my tune. That is not normal ant behavior. That's the behavior of a creature that sees me as prey.

Fire ants are now in a category previously inhabited only by cockroaches. That's the category of bugs that I will gleefully destroy in an unbridled holocaust of anything and everything available, as long as it will achieve maximum fatality and I can do a Scooby dance on the graves of these evil mutant nightmares from the very depths of hell.

Not feeling ooky watching the video.
posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 7:27 PM on December 11, 2013 [9 favorites]


I suppose my position is informed by having carefully crafted a lifestyle in which this is not a possibility.

Ho ho! I lived as you did, once. It was a good time, Life Before The Fire Ants.

As for my Life After The Fire Ants, the highlight would probably be the two days' sleep on Benadryl, finally free from Fire Ants. That was pleasant.
posted by Capt. Renault at 7:29 PM on December 11, 2013 [2 favorites]


Anyone on the pro-ant side need only remember that in floods, fire ants will form rafts of their own bodies and float around biting the shit out of things caught in the flood with them.
posted by Ghostride The Whip at 7:30 PM on December 11, 2013 [26 favorites]


I had a problem with the previous post about termites (until we learned that it was a vacant colony that was cast) but those were native termites, living off in the savannah, performing important services in their ecosystem. Solenopsis invicta (How's "invicta" for an evocative scientific name, by the way?) on the other hand is a pestilent invasive in Lousiana and elsewhere in North America, which causes nothing but harm. Purely in economic terms they cost us about $5 billion a year in the USA alone, according to the FDA. Exterminating fire ant colonies in areas where they are invasive is a good thing, and molten aluminum has got to be a pretty instantaneous and therefore humane death for something as small as a fire ant. I don't have nearly as big a problem in this case.
posted by Scientist at 7:39 PM on December 11, 2013 [4 favorites]


I've seen this done with plaster and a termite colony, and it was enormous. It extended for like 30 feet, and went down 5 or 6 feet.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 7:41 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


Fire ants. Pffft. Childs play. I bring to you, the Crazy Ant. Not crazy enough? More?

Nite nite.
posted by Splunge at 7:42 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


Kinda pales next to Previously,

I don't know. Fire ants are the worst. With "crazy" ants, the worst that will happen is that you'll turn around to find that a perfectly good glass of wine has ants floating in it. With fire ants, you can end up in the hospital.
posted by Sara C. at 7:43 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


Wait, I think that was the wrong "previously".
posted by Sara C. at 7:45 PM on December 11, 2013


Yeah, Sys Rq's previously is truly amazing, but also really sad. I get the scientific value of visualizing a huge sprawling ant colony with liquid concrete, honest, but find myself wishing scientists would take a moment to both honor and record themselves honoring the animal lives they're destroying as they publicize important information. Even a small ritual - a moment of silence, an offer of thanks - would go a long way towards alleviating the distaste I feel.

Not so much with invasive fire ants, though. I feel much more for the local species they're displacing, and if someone can make cool art out of destroying a fire ant colony I can find only tiny traces of sympathy. Plus, if I had any near where I lived, I know I'd destroy them as best I could, so it would be very hypocritical of me to object here.
posted by mediareport at 7:53 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


Fire ants. Pffft. Childs play. I bring to you, the Crazy Ant. Not crazy enough? More?


if anybody needs me I'm moving to the moon
posted by The Whelk at 12:27 PM on December 10

posted by louche mustachio at 8:05 PM on December 11, 2013


Case in point: A Bad Catholic's link to that network news Sunday morning segment. At 1:24 it has the decency to acknowledge "the cast will sacrifice the lives of the ants, but it will also provide useful research on their mysterious underground colonies." Would a moment of silence from the scientists be so terrible right then?

No. It would not be so terrible. Anyone, scientist or not, who'd sneer at the idea that destroying an entire enormous ant colony in one hot liquid move deserves a small prayer-like moment is a fool who has no idea what animal intelligence actually means.

Also:

One day, some big ole alien gon come along and pour liquid aluminium into yo house AND THEN YA'LL BE SARRY YU DEED IT TO DEESE ANTZ!
posted by mediareport at 8:13 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


When he was hosing it off, I was secretly waiting for the fire ants to jump out all Fatal Attraction style.
posted by 4ster at 8:17 PM on December 11, 2013


Haha okay this is probably a sign that I grew up in Florida but my first thoughts were, hmm, different than most of yours:

Before pouring: "Oh man this is going to be great. Thousands of fire ants will die en masse and I will get the pleasure of watching them die bwahaha. It will be even better than when I got bored and would flush them out with the hose because water merely carried them closer so they could bite the shit out of me."

During pouring: "Wait, why aren't the ants streaming out of the anthill? I wanted to watch ants running away from rivers of molten aluminium, running for their little lives before getting swallowed up by the silver tide. I can't even hear their screams! Well, I guess knowing they're in there dying is pretty cool, too."

After pouring: "There must be thousands, maybe millions of ants entombed in that sculpture. Some measure of vengeance I suppose. Pretty sculpture, too. What a neat art project for someone with fire ants in their yard."

So, normally I'm a pretty peaceful person. I like most ants, I rarely kill spiders (pretty much unless they're actually in my bed), I'll pick up and rehome a palmetto bug without a second thought. But at no time did a speck of empathy or compassion for these fire ants enter my mind until I read this thread. Those bastards can all die. You should have no doubt that they would destroy you and all you hold dear in seconds if only we let them.

And some part of me is still a little disappointed at the method of their deaths. So quick and painless. Way better than they deserve.
posted by mosessis at 8:23 PM on December 11, 2013 [11 favorites]


Is it for certain that the colony wasn't abandoned? Seems vacant.
posted by shivohum at 8:33 PM on December 11, 2013


You clearly see a few ants leaving side holes in the mound around 36 seconds into the video. I imagine pouring molten aluminum into the entrance discourages the rest from using it as an exit.
posted by mediareport at 8:43 PM on December 11, 2013 [1 favorite]


Not that sell for $1000 a pop on Ebay, no.

I guess this means I'm officially obsessed now, but their previous auctions have gone for $165-250.
posted by mediareport at 8:47 PM on December 11, 2013


Fire ants have only one insect predator: "Some 110 species of the genus Pseudacteon, or ant-decapitating flies, have been described. Members of Pseudacteon reproduce by laying eggs in the thorax of the ant. The first instar larvae migrates to the head, then develops by feeding on the hemolymph, muscle tissue, and nervous tissue. After about two weeks, they cause the ant's head to fall off by releasing an enzyme that dissolves the membrane attaching the ant's head to its body. The fly pupates in the detached head capsule, emerging two weeks later." via Wikipedia

Eeeearrgh... So, yeah, molten metal sounds like a better plan than going with the "Little Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly," strategy. I just hope that people don't get the idea to do this to non-invasive ants. Nature's beauty wasn't put here for us to destroy.
posted by Skwirl at 8:47 PM on December 11, 2013 [2 favorites]


Ghostride The Whip "I'm from New Orleans and I say we kill em all!"

\m/ Cue up Seek 'n' Destroy and bring on the molten metal.
posted by smcameron at 9:04 PM on December 11, 2013 [4 favorites]


Oh, the humantity!
posted by woodblock100 at 9:25 PM on December 11, 2013


Yeah, fuck fire ants. When they invade your sleeping three-year-old's bed and start biting him unprovoked, and you come tearing into your screaming child's bedroom to see them swarming everywhere, you're damn right you start thinking about flamethrowers and molten metal and firehoses squirting gouts of hydrofluoric acid. Fuck those invasive rapacious bastards.
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:44 PM on December 11, 2013 [3 favorites]


"That is wise. Keep doing that. Definitely do not climb a beautiful spreading live oak overhanging a river in Victoria Texas, and definitely definitely do not put your hand on that clump of ball moss. "

Or accidentally step onto the grass in a parking lot getting out of your gramma's car in Orlando, and they swarm up your leg and you have to spend the next several hours of vacation that should have been on the Back to the Future ride in agony, trying to get all the burning, biting ants off your balls.

Fuck 'em. No mercy.
posted by klangklangston at 9:58 PM on December 11, 2013 [5 favorites]


They are just amazingly aggressive.
posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 10:18 PM on December 11, 2013


WHY IS THIS VIDEO NOT SET TO THE PINK PANTHER THEME?
posted by MuffinMan at 10:32 PM on December 11, 2013 [6 favorites]


Where are all the ants? I expected to see hundreds coming out of the colony but only saw two or three.
Is this a deserted colony?
posted by sour cream at 10:50 PM on December 11, 2013


I guess this means I'm officially obsessed now, but their previous auctions have gone for $165-250.

The current one is up to $2000 now. It is beautiful, and honestly is worth the money, but it's an interesting jump.
posted by Dip Flash at 11:06 PM on December 11, 2013


I remember my great-grandfather pouring boiling water down fire ant holes in florida after my brother and I wandered near one of their lairs. If he'd had aluminum, we'd at least have a souvenir.
posted by The Potate at 11:29 PM on December 11, 2013


Didn't do the bit where an ant leaps out of the molten metal but Ripley hits the sprinklers and it explodes. B+
posted by EndsOfInvention at 12:15 AM on December 12, 2013 [3 favorites]


I don't know. Fire ants are the worst. With "crazy" ants, the worst that will happen is that you'll turn around to find that a perfectly good glass of wine has ants floating in it. With fire ants, you can end up in the hospital.
posted by Sara C.


Fire ants can be killed with constant vigilance. The worst part of Raspberry Crazy Ants is that they seem to be unstoppable by normal extermination methods. The next worst part is that they're attracted to electronics. They'll engulf the innards of your favorite electronic device untiÙl^ßYäcAvriÝϵXÖFÔý¶Ý¢ªj~&NO CARRIER")
posted by mcrandello at 1:00 AM on December 12, 2013 [4 favorites]


Although in general, screw fire ants. Like the old exterminator ad down here says, no one makes fire ant plushie toys. Well, nevermind.
posted by mcrandello at 1:04 AM on December 12, 2013


Is that from the same manufacturer of the plushie diseases, bedbugs, and other plagues?


Because then it makes sense.
posted by louche mustachio at 1:19 AM on December 12, 2013


I only got bit once (oh my god, I was on the sidewalk in a parking lot outside a K&B there was no grass around for yards but those fuckers were living in the cracks and decided that, hey, that bag looks nice, she's just set it down for all of five seconds to put something in, let's go on a ride and then CHOMP), but that was enough.

I thought I hated ants before (due to my Southern Californian upbringing with the little black ants that will swarm and eat anything, including your soap and shampoo in your shower what the fuck why are you all here this is my shower you fuckers), but fuck fire ants so very hard. With molten aluminium.

Also, you know, you can melt down aluminium cans really easily - just have a wood fire (like in a firepit or campsite), put a steel can in, and then the aluminium cans will melt down inside the steel can. Then you can make your own tiny fire ant death from above.
posted by Katemonkey at 1:23 AM on December 12, 2013 [3 favorites]


how would you feel if a giant alien poured molten aluminum into your domicile, no less your entire city?

"Killing 'just an ant' still ends a life.

more...

more...

We have made the ants as like non-living things; we have desensitized ourselves to the needs of a creature "other" than us. We mock their instincts; we anthropomorphize their intentions. We are no more than they; we are simply different.
posted by Vibrissae at 1:33 AM on December 12, 2013 [2 favorites]


Just think of it as protecting the local ecosystem from harmful invasive species, then. One aluminum sculpture at a time.
posted by ook at 3:12 AM on December 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


"If all of humanity were to disappear, the remainder of life would spring back and flourish. The mass extinctions now under way would cease, the damaged ecosystems heal and expand outward. If all the ants somehow disappeared, the effect would be exactly the opposite, and catastrophic. Species extinction would increase even more over the present rate, and the land ecosystems would shrivel more rapidly as the considerable services provided by these insects were pulled away."

- "Journey To The Ants" by Bert Hölldobler & E.O. Wilson
posted by fairmettle at 3:58 AM on December 12, 2013


Fire ants aren't really members of Earth's formicidae, they're actually tiny cybernetic first-wave invaders from an alien machine civilization that have giant cluster-ships on their way, scheduled to arrive around 2048. The fire ants are establishing a distributed intelligence network, which partly explains their extreme aggressive defensiveness. Mostly, though, they're just dickheads.

Killing them is protecting Mother Earth, it's a noble act. Trust me on this.
posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 6:12 AM on December 12, 2013 [2 favorites]


Someday giant ant-like aliens will rip the top off of an earth skyscraper and pour molten metal down the elevator shaft. I wonder how much that sculpture would sell for on eBay?
posted by mullacc at 6:52 AM on December 12, 2013


"We have made the ants as like non-living things; we have desensitized ourselves to the needs of a creature "other" than us. We mock their instincts; we anthropomorphize their intentions."

You know that Insectrights.org is a parody, right?
posted by klangklangston at 8:12 AM on December 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


how would you feel if a giant alien poured molten aluminum into your domicile, no less your entire city?

I'm sure all our dying thoughts will be of how you were right and we were wrong.
posted by elizardbits at 8:29 AM on December 12, 2013 [9 favorites]


Despite my username, I hate fire ants.

So one day I was out riding my motorcycle around on fire roads here in East Tennessee. I stopped for a break and unthinkingly set my helmet on the ground. When the break was over, I put my helmet back on. Yup. Fire ants. In my helmet.

When I find a nest in our yard at home or at the shop, I solve it with gasoline and a match. I live to watch these bastards burn.
posted by workerant at 8:49 AM on December 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


We mock their instincts

We fear their instincts, more like.

As extermination goes, this has fewer side effects than bifenthrin
posted by IndigoJones at 9:12 AM on December 12, 2013


oh my god, I was on the sidewalk in a parking lot outside a K&B

Favorited for the mention of K&B alone.
posted by Sara C. at 9:44 AM on December 12, 2013


If you think fire ants are bad, pray that Wassmania auropunctata aka the "electric ant" never invades your area. They are so small as to be nearly invisible, and live on thin branches at about chest height. The bites are not as painful as those of fire ants, but the pain continues for hours even after the ant is removed. Worse, if you brush against one of their branches (which you inevitably will do if you go walking in a forest that has them) their strategy is to silently make their way to your most sensitive areas (genitals, breasts, armpits, etc) and then all start biting you at once. I have no idea how they know to do this, but I can personally attest that it's true.

They're also extremely destructive to the environment, as they're territorial/aggressive to the point of wiping out pretty much all other insect life in their area. They form supercolonies that can have many millions of individuals and cover many square kilometers, with multiple queens, multiple nests, and all the ants in the supercolony working together interchangeably. They are impossible to eradicate, and will expand slowly throughout a forest in a creeping blob until they come to a stream or river, at which point they have a highway that will spread them downstream quite quickly indeed. Since they are so small, they also have a nasty habit of hitching rides on clothing and gear – meaning that they have a high potential to invade new areas.

Entire Central African villages will evacuate or move if they get a Wassmania infestation. They're incredibly nasty and we currently have no idea how to stop them or even slow them down.

Interestingly, they're from Argentina – just like fire ants and that other big invasive ant, the Argentine ant (which does not bite, but which forms supercolonies that get into everything and which pushes out native ants). What is it with Argentina and invasive ant species? I don't know.
posted by Scientist at 9:46 AM on December 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


how would you feel if a giant alien poured molten aluminum into your domicile, no less your entire city?

Uncomfortably warm, briefly.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:49 AM on December 12, 2013 [11 favorites]


I'm not sure I'd want to pay $2000 to make my house resemble Jabba The Hutt's palace.
posted by Optamystic at 10:19 AM on December 12, 2013


You know that Insectrights.org is a parody, right?

Gotcha! :)
posted by Vibrissae at 12:34 PM on December 12, 2013


WHY IS THIS VIDEO NOT SET TO THE PINK PANTHER THEME?


oh come on, did none of your dads tell you jokes?
posted by louche mustachio at 12:47 PM on December 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


I'm a frayed knot.
posted by XMLicious at 5:11 PM on December 12, 2013


I am so sorry.
posted by jquinby at 5:55 PM on December 12, 2013 [1 favorite]


I don't know. Fire ants are the worst. With "crazy" ants, the worst that will happen is that you'll turn around to find that a perfectly good glass of wine has ants floating in it. With fire ants, you can end up in the hospital.

Fire ants have actually put me in the hospital once. I hate them passionately, but something about killing them with molten aluminum makes me feel bad for them.

For bastard tiny ants that put me in the hospital with both my feet swollen to the size of footballs and agonizing pain.

I don't think making me feel sorry for fireants is a nice thing to do to me.
posted by winna at 10:40 AM on December 13, 2013 [1 favorite]


When I was a kid mom, my brother and I used to visit our family in Texas. We had 3 girl cousins. They would show us the fire ant bites on their feet and legs. Round red lesions. They'd describe the agony of the bite. But they always ran around barefoot in their yard. My brother and I did not. And so we never got bitten. Ever. One day I asked my cousin Maria why they didn't wear sneakers or shoes. I got a look something like, "What is this crazy talk?" Go figure.
posted by Splunge at 4:48 PM on December 14, 2013


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