There is a season, churn, churn, churn.
December 29, 2014 8:48 AM Subscribe
There are many, many black days. The most famous, probably, is Black Tuesday, the Wall Street crash of 1929 that is commonly held as the start of the Great Depression. Its polar opposite? Black Friday, the day after the US Thanksgiving Holiday, where buying is the thing. George Soros, amongst others, broke the UK Pound and the government of John Major on Black Wednesday, and the peak of the 1988 Yellowstone Wildfires happened on Black Saturday.
But there's another black day -- a day that happens every year. A day that is today. Black Monday.
Black Monday is the day after the NFL regular season, and the reason for the name? This is the day where coaches and GMs are fired after particularly bad seasons. So far, we have.
Chicago Bears HC Marc Trestman and GM Phil Emery
Atlanta Falcons HC Mike Smith
New York Jets HC Rex Ryan and GM John Idzik
And, a Black Monday Sunday Preview Show, San Francisco 49's HC John Harbaugh has mutually agreed to part ways with the organization and is rumored to become the new head coach at the University of Michigan for a cool $8 million a year. In reporting the news, the Detroit Free Press carefully put a picture of Jim Harbaugh on the cover of today's paper.
Black Monday is the day after the NFL regular season, and the reason for the name? This is the day where coaches and GMs are fired after particularly bad seasons. So far, we have.
Chicago Bears HC Marc Trestman and GM Phil Emery
Atlanta Falcons HC Mike Smith
New York Jets HC Rex Ryan and GM John Idzik
And, a Black Monday Sunday Preview Show, San Francisco 49's HC John Harbaugh has mutually agreed to part ways with the organization and is rumored to become the new head coach at the University of Michigan for a cool $8 million a year. In reporting the news, the Detroit Free Press carefully put a picture of Jim Harbaugh on the cover of today's paper.
I thought Black Monday was that day in 1987 when the stock market crashed a bunch. We need to add more days.
posted by Melismata at 8:50 AM on December 29, 2014 [4 favorites]
posted by Melismata at 8:50 AM on December 29, 2014 [4 favorites]
And I thought this was Black Sunday (the worst storms of the Dust Bowl in 1935). Again, we need more days of the week.
posted by Melismata at 8:52 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by Melismata at 8:52 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
Mayor Quimby: I hereby declare a state of emergency: Code Black.
Lenny: Black? That's the worst color there is.
[Lenny turns to Carl]
Lenny: No offense there, Carl.
Carl: Eh, I get it all the time.
posted by 445supermag at 8:53 AM on December 29, 2014 [10 favorites]
Lenny: Black? That's the worst color there is.
[Lenny turns to Carl]
Lenny: No offense there, Carl.
Carl: Eh, I get it all the time.
posted by 445supermag at 8:53 AM on December 29, 2014 [10 favorites]
Black Friday now just means Go Buy Stuff!
Here in Europe (well, UK and Portugal at least) , the stores have been promoting Black Friday even though Thanksgiving is not a holiday. Also, I saw signs last week promoting "Black Friday" sales for the day after Christmas - which happens this year to fall on a Friday.
Retail will take what it can. I really hate this invention of new Holidays whose only purpose is to shop.
posted by vacapinta at 8:55 AM on December 29, 2014
Here in Europe (well, UK and Portugal at least) , the stores have been promoting Black Friday even though Thanksgiving is not a holiday. Also, I saw signs last week promoting "Black Friday" sales for the day after Christmas - which happens this year to fall on a Friday.
Retail will take what it can. I really hate this invention of new Holidays whose only purpose is to shop.
posted by vacapinta at 8:55 AM on December 29, 2014
You got your Harbaughs reversed.
posted by asterix at 8:56 AM on December 29, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by asterix at 8:56 AM on December 29, 2014 [2 favorites]
Black Friday has an entirely different meaning for Aussies. Something good to know if you're doing international marketing.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 8:56 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 8:56 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
Letting go of Harbaugh was so dumb. The niners are my team and it pains me so much. My conspiracy theory is that they only needed him to get a new stadium and now they're content to let the team slide back into mediocrity.
posted by Carillon at 9:06 AM on December 29, 2014
posted by Carillon at 9:06 AM on December 29, 2014
Some sources date the start of the 1929 Crash to Black Tuesday (Oct 29 that year), others to Black Thursday (Oct 24). Unless we're going to rely on it for both, we still appear to have only six of the week's seven days covered.
posted by Paul Slade at 9:12 AM on December 29, 2014
posted by Paul Slade at 9:12 AM on December 29, 2014
New Order's "Blue Monday" works rather well as the lament of a shitcanned coach:
Those who came before meposted by Iridic at 9:13 AM on December 29, 2014 [4 favorites]
Lived through their vocations
From the past until completion
They will turn away no more.
And I still find it so hard
To say what I need to say
But I'm quite sure that you'll tell me
Just how I should feel today.
I see a ship in the harbor
I can and shall obey
But if it wasn't for your misfortunes
I'd be a heavenly person today.
And Kyle Orton retired! Kyle Orton!
Marrone and Gym Shorts have secured their jobs, I think, but there's ample evidence that Hackett must go. What OCs are free this year and willing to come to a team that has missed the playoffs for 15 years, though?
posted by everybody had matching towels at 9:16 AM on December 29, 2014
Marrone and Gym Shorts have secured their jobs, I think, but there's ample evidence that Hackett must go. What OCs are free this year and willing to come to a team that has missed the playoffs for 15 years, though?
posted by everybody had matching towels at 9:16 AM on December 29, 2014
The first thing I thought of, because I'm one of those slacker sad 90s people, I suppose:
Whatsoever I've feared has
Come to life
Whatsoever I've fought off
Became my life
Just when every day
Seemed to greet me with a smile
Sunspots have faded
And now I'm doing time
Now I'm doing time
'Cause I fell on
Black days
I fell on
Black days
...
How would I know?
That this could be my fate?
That Soundgarden. So cheery!
posted by droplet at 9:24 AM on December 29, 2014
Whatsoever I've feared has
Come to life
Whatsoever I've fought off
Became my life
Just when every day
Seemed to greet me with a smile
Sunspots have faded
And now I'm doing time
Now I'm doing time
'Cause I fell on
Black days
I fell on
Black days
...
How would I know?
That this could be my fate?
That Soundgarden. So cheery!
posted by droplet at 9:24 AM on December 29, 2014
You got your Harbaughs reversed.
So did the Detroit Free Press.
posted by DrAstroZoom at 9:25 AM on December 29, 2014
So did the Detroit Free Press.
posted by DrAstroZoom at 9:25 AM on December 29, 2014
Every Monday is Black Monday when you're a Browns fan.
posted by charred husk at 9:26 AM on December 29, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by charred husk at 9:26 AM on December 29, 2014 [2 favorites]
Days can also be stoney (or bloody, I guess)
posted by Monday, stony Monday at 9:26 AM on December 29, 2014
posted by Monday, stony Monday at 9:26 AM on December 29, 2014
There are a lot of black Fridays out there. This is my favorite.
posted by TedW at 9:26 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by TedW at 9:26 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
As a Dolphins fan, I received much less blackness this year than I desired.
posted by DrAstroZoom at 9:27 AM on December 29, 2014
posted by DrAstroZoom at 9:27 AM on December 29, 2014
I just assumed that Black Monday was the day that a freak storm disrupted the King Edward's Army in Chartres back in 1360.
posted by ovvl at 9:30 AM on December 29, 2014
posted by ovvl at 9:30 AM on December 29, 2014
My conspiracy theory is that they only needed him to get a new stadium and now they're content to let the team slide back into mediocrity.
posted by Carillon at 12:06 PM on December 29
puts on tinfoil hat Right there with ya, son.
posted by magstheaxe at 9:33 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by Carillon at 12:06 PM on December 29
puts on tinfoil hat Right there with ya, son.
posted by magstheaxe at 9:33 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
As a Dolphins fan, I received much less blackness this year than I desired.
Patience, my long-suffering friend. Defensive coordinators don't usually get axed on Monday. Coyle needs to go, but I won't be shocked if he stays. It would be hard to find a replacement to serve under a head coach in the last year of his contract. Overall, I'm actually more hopeful than I have been in years, despite the spectacular defensive flameout to end the season. For once we go into the offseason knowing we have an actual, real-life quarterback. It almost makes the pain go away.
posted by schoolgirl report at 9:39 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
Patience, my long-suffering friend. Defensive coordinators don't usually get axed on Monday. Coyle needs to go, but I won't be shocked if he stays. It would be hard to find a replacement to serve under a head coach in the last year of his contract. Overall, I'm actually more hopeful than I have been in years, despite the spectacular defensive flameout to end the season. For once we go into the offseason knowing we have an actual, real-life quarterback. It almost makes the pain go away.
posted by schoolgirl report at 9:39 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
9:30 a.m. ET: Considering the Atlanta Falcons had reportedly hired a search firm before the regular-season finale had even kicked off, it came as no surprise when the team announced coach Mike Smith had been fired.
Smith's career in Atlanta started well, with four playoff appearances in five seasons, although he had just one postseason win. A 10-22 record the past two years, finished by a terrible 34-3 loss to Carolina with the NFC South championship on the line Sunday, was too much for Smith to overcome.
Although I am not a Falcons fan, they are the de facto local team, so it is hard not to follow them. I did get a kick out of a friend's facebook post: "Fire Smith at halftime. It's your only hope." And why hire a search firm for an NFL coach? There are what, maybe 50 realistic candidates for the job?
posted by TedW at 9:39 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
Smith's career in Atlanta started well, with four playoff appearances in five seasons, although he had just one postseason win. A 10-22 record the past two years, finished by a terrible 34-3 loss to Carolina with the NFC South championship on the line Sunday, was too much for Smith to overcome.
Although I am not a Falcons fan, they are the de facto local team, so it is hard not to follow them. I did get a kick out of a friend's facebook post: "Fire Smith at halftime. It's your only hope." And why hire a search firm for an NFL coach? There are what, maybe 50 realistic candidates for the job?
posted by TedW at 9:39 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
I thought the stadium deal was in the works before he was even hired?
My understanding was that they were trying to use it as leverage to get the city of SF to bend over backwards at first and only later actually became an actual plan to move there, perhaps after he was hired not certain on the exact timing. It's depressing to me for a couple of reasons. Not in the least is that my father was a season ticket holder since the move from Keezar and had been to pretty much every home game since then. I mean we're talking multiple decades. And then with the move and the PSL price they screwed him over for the tech company money I guess. Now the games are half empty and he won't even consider going to the new stadium. New era indeed.
posted by Carillon at 10:07 AM on December 29, 2014
My understanding was that they were trying to use it as leverage to get the city of SF to bend over backwards at first and only later actually became an actual plan to move there, perhaps after he was hired not certain on the exact timing. It's depressing to me for a couple of reasons. Not in the least is that my father was a season ticket holder since the move from Keezar and had been to pretty much every home game since then. I mean we're talking multiple decades. And then with the move and the PSL price they screwed him over for the tech company money I guess. Now the games are half empty and he won't even consider going to the new stadium. New era indeed.
posted by Carillon at 10:07 AM on December 29, 2014
According to an Ann Arbor paper on Christmas Day, Harbaugh is an extra strength, all-purpose, household cleaner: "abrasive and effective".
posted by JoeXIII007 at 10:17 AM on December 29, 2014
posted by JoeXIII007 at 10:17 AM on December 29, 2014
It's high time we put the Black Wodin back in Black Wednesday.
posted by Mister_A at 10:37 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by Mister_A at 10:37 AM on December 29, 2014 [1 favorite]
New York Jets HC Rex Ryan
Not surprising, I mean when your name is Rex Ryan clearly the only job that's going to be the right fit for you is two-fisted adventurer.
posted by jason_steakums at 11:36 AM on December 29, 2014 [2 favorites]
Not surprising, I mean when your name is Rex Ryan clearly the only job that's going to be the right fit for you is two-fisted adventurer.
posted by jason_steakums at 11:36 AM on December 29, 2014 [2 favorites]
Wait, they're publishing the Snooze (or is it "Snews"?) in paper form again?
I've been disgusted by U of M's football culture for so long that I didn't think there was much left that could get to me, but $8,000,000 for a football coach really bugs me.
posted by Nerd of the North at 11:57 AM on December 29, 2014 [2 favorites]
I've been disgusted by U of M's football culture for so long that I didn't think there was much left that could get to me, but $8,000,000 for a football coach really bugs me.
posted by Nerd of the North at 11:57 AM on December 29, 2014 [2 favorites]
This was the best Black Sunday (it had Bruce Dern in full crazy mode AND the Goodyear Blimp)
some should-be-obvious media-based Black Day premieres...
December 21, 1979: The Black Hole Friday
July 2, 1997: Men in Black Wednesday
December 4, 2011: Black Mirror Sunday
March 30, 2013: Orphan Black Saturday
July 11, 2013: Orange Is The New Black Thursday
September 24, 2014: Black-ish Wednesday
of course:
June 15, 1983: Black Adder Wednesday
January 9, 1986: Black Adder 2 Thursday
September 17, 1987: Black Adder the Third Thursday
September 28, 1989 : Black Adder Goes Forth Thursday
and whenever the next MAD Magazine hits the newsstands:
Blecch Wednesday
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:04 PM on December 29, 2014
some should-be-obvious media-based Black Day premieres...
December 21, 1979: The Black Hole Friday
July 2, 1997: Men in Black Wednesday
December 4, 2011: Black Mirror Sunday
March 30, 2013: Orphan Black Saturday
July 11, 2013: Orange Is The New Black Thursday
September 24, 2014: Black-ish Wednesday
of course:
June 15, 1983: Black Adder Wednesday
January 9, 1986: Black Adder 2 Thursday
September 17, 1987: Black Adder the Third Thursday
September 28, 1989 : Black Adder Goes Forth Thursday
and whenever the next MAD Magazine hits the newsstands:
Blecch Wednesday
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:04 PM on December 29, 2014
The Bears need to give Cutler the boot, too. Make sure to actually kick him out, because if you ask Jay Cutler to throw himself out some other team's just going to catch him.
posted by Pope Guilty at 2:10 PM on December 29, 2014 [4 favorites]
posted by Pope Guilty at 2:10 PM on December 29, 2014 [4 favorites]
$8,000,000 for a football coach really bugs me
Guess we're getting a relative bargain at OSU by only paying Urban 4 mil a year, just goes to show how desperate UM is to restore respectability to their program.
posted by e1c at 12:35 PM on December 30, 2014
Guess we're getting a relative bargain at OSU by only paying Urban 4 mil a year, just goes to show how desperate UM is to restore respectability to their program.
posted by e1c at 12:35 PM on December 30, 2014
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posted by Steely-eyed Missile Man at 8:50 AM on December 29, 2014