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March 5, 2015 8:22 AM   Subscribe

 
It seems so wrong that the piglet in the last video is named "Hamlet"
posted by Gorgik at 8:27 AM on March 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


I WANT ONE.
posted by DigDoug at 8:30 AM on March 5, 2015


It's all fun and games until someone is bacon.
posted by The Bellman at 8:31 AM on March 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


8.7% of my fpps are tagged piggies.

That seems low to me.
posted by phunniemee at 8:31 AM on March 5, 2015 [7 favorites]


Tiny pigs like to eat. Tiny pigs are cute when they eat and grunt. Thank you phunniemee for the tiny pig videos!
posted by 724A at 8:42 AM on March 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


Public Service Announcement: there is no such thing as a "micro pig." The vast majority of these videos are of piglets. Vietnamese Pot-Bellied Pigs are smaller than farm pigs to be sure, but full grown they can still be as big as a dog, weigh much more than an equivalent-size dog, and require a ton of attention and care.

What's worse, lots of jerks are going around marketing "micro pigs," selling people piglets from large breed pigs and then skipping town before the piglets grow to full size.

Just for some perspective -- the pig in the last video going down the stairs grew up to be this big.
posted by overeducated_alligator at 8:48 AM on March 5, 2015 [17 favorites]


Awww, Hamlet looks delicious.
posted by phunniemee at 8:51 AM on March 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


overeducated_alligator beat me to the punch, but here are some links with documentation of the fact that there is no such thing as a micro, mini, or teacup pig.

These baby pigs in these videos are very very very cute.
posted by sparklemotion at 8:51 AM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Pig celebrity Esther was sold as a 4 pound "micro pig", and has grown to weigh over 500 pounds.

(500 pounds of cute)
posted by BinaryApe at 8:53 AM on March 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


One of the sites debunking teacup/micro pigs has a photo of a day-old bear cub in the palm of someone's hand and wonders if there might be a market for "teacup bears" …
posted by overeducated_alligator at 8:56 AM on March 5, 2015 [5 favorites]


What's worse, lots of jerks are going around marketing "micro pigs," selling people piglets from large breed pigs and then skipping town before the piglets grow to full size.

STERLING: Look, Ray, I know you don't do well with peer pressure—
RAY: Whaaaaaaaaa—
STERLING: Teacup pig?
RAY: Oh. Yeah.
STERLING: And how big was little Hamlet when you finally had to get rid of him?
RAY: He was up there.
STERLING: Yeah. Like 300 shit-covered pounds.

[exciting aeronautic mishap occurs]

RAY: You were the one yappin' your head off about my damn teacup pig!
STERLING: Who I hope to see on my next BLT!
RAY: Well, too bad, because he went to live on a—
STERLING: A farm! Exactly. So, unless that farm had a magical talking spider...
RAY: [gasp]
PAM: Yeah, they don't keep 'em around for their milk.
posted by Sys Rq at 9:02 AM on March 5, 2015 [14 favorites]


wonders if there might be a market for "teacup bears" …

Least marketable? Teacup wombat. Gross. Ew. No.
posted by phunniemee at 9:02 AM on March 5, 2015


Yeah but at least those guys seem grow up to a pretty manageable size.
posted by overeducated_alligator at 9:04 AM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Least marketable? Teacup wombat. Gross. Ew. No.

Those are the worst parakeets.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:05 AM on March 5, 2015 [7 favorites]


Related video: fatty wombat wants to play.
posted by phunniemee at 9:08 AM on March 5, 2015 [5 favorites]


Least marketable? Teacup wombat. Gross. Ew. No.

I want to snuggle it and hug it and tickle its little claws!

...mind you, I also think echidna puggles are adorable, so there may be something broken about my cute reciever...
posted by sciatrix at 9:08 AM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yeah but at least those guys seem grow up to a pretty manageable size.

That looks like a cute ball of fluff, but it's really a cute ball of pure muscle that will destroy you and your ute in a matter of seconds.
posted by Sys Rq at 9:09 AM on March 5, 2015


Hamlet, previously.
posted by 1970s Antihero at 9:13 AM on March 5, 2015


Wombats are seriously underrated as exemplars of cute, I feel.
posted by holborne at 9:17 AM on March 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


Omg... I... I need one... now... need it need it need it ... give one to meeee ...
posted by like_neon at 9:18 AM on March 5, 2015


I mean, Yo Yo Ma with a wombat! Seriously now.
posted by holborne at 9:19 AM on March 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


Much cuter than what my area has to deal with.

The tenderloin was 5 foot, 10 inches long.
posted by Mr. Yuck at 9:25 AM on March 5, 2015


No spiders? Good!
posted by Splunge at 9:32 AM on March 5, 2015


Those little fellas sure are cute!
posted by marxchivist at 9:33 AM on March 5, 2015


There's a pig ... uh ... spa and sanctuary in PA whose Facebook page elicits squees from the DingoWife all the time; she loves pigs so much that I'm pretty sure a date with their B&B is inevitable. In the meantime, I'm gonna go ahead and plug my ears now in preparation for all the supersonic eees and aaahs that will happen when she sees this post (hi sweetie love you and your wacky pig obsession).
posted by DingoMutt at 9:41 AM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


I feel like John Irving has written a novel about "teacup bears".
posted by pxe2000 at 9:47 AM on March 5, 2015


Are guinea pigs teacup capybaras?
posted by rivenwanderer at 9:51 AM on March 5, 2015 [5 favorites]




Guinea pigs are teacup guinea pigs.
posted by phunniemee at 9:53 AM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Cute and so very piggly!

A woman I work with once told us about a friend of hers who bought a "micro" pig. Except it grew up to be a "pig". She basically treated it like a dog and it would sit on her lap to be stroked and she took it for walks etc. As it got bigger and bigger she realised she'd been sold a pig in a poke, as it were. But Piggy didnt know anything was amiss. Fast forward til it's fully grown and still trying to get up on her lap (the mental image of her sitting on the sofa with a full-grown pig on her knee still makes me snort). The day came when she sadly had to give it to a farmer because she didn't have room for an actual pig in her living room. The mental image of that day - Piggy watching her walk away thinking "Where are you going, Mama?" - still makes me all sad. The End.
posted by billiebee at 10:00 AM on March 5, 2015 [5 favorites]


god damnit billiebee i didn't need that today

poor little lonely piggy

time to watch babe and cry during the scene where Farmer Hoggett sings to Babe
posted by dismas at 10:12 AM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Agreed with sciatrix that those baby wombats are adorable, and I want to skritch their little wrinkly necks.

Then again I have a deep and abiding love for naked mole rats, to the point where I brought a stuffed one on a camp trip to a zoo gift shop, and all the staff and campers spent the rest of the day arguing about whether it was cute or totally gross. Maybe my cute-dar is irreparably fucked.
posted by ActionPopulated at 10:54 AM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


wonders if there might be a market for "teacup bears" …

Uh, yeah? MeMail me.
posted by Room 641-A at 11:36 AM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Why have a teacup bear when you can have a house hippo?

yes it is the worst cat
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:47 AM on March 5, 2015 [5 favorites]


may I please express my sincere gratitude that the title of this thread was not used for the deep-fried tarantula thread upstairs because oh my gawd
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 11:49 AM on March 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


Oh, so when it's a teacup pig it's ok?? Some of you live with the luxury of teacup spiders and you don't even like them.
posted by halifix at 1:16 PM on March 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


Came in to make sure someone had mentioned teacup/micro pigs are a scam. Worse than that, they're abused pigs--malnourished to keep them small until they are sold. New owners are given instructions to continue to underfeed them, which if you follow will give them all sorts of health problems.
posted by danny the boy at 1:29 PM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oh God, please give me the strength to stop... eating... BACON. Why did such adorable little animals have to be so damn delicious? Piggies are friends, not food!
posted by Ursula Hitler at 5:08 PM on March 5, 2015


Piggy watching her walk away thinking "Where are you going, Mama?" - still makes me all sad. The End.

Damn it, Billiebee, now I'VE got the sads, too. (I'm going to tell myself it was a farm run by a happy vegan family who gave Mr. Pig the run of the place.)
posted by Ursula Hitler at 5:12 PM on March 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


I helped make this little bacon.
posted by MonkeyToes at 5:24 PM on March 5, 2015


Those piglets eat healthier than I do.
posted by InsertNiftyNameHere at 9:09 PM on March 5, 2015


Goddammit billiebee. I have used up all of my sad today. You are going to have to come back tomorrow if you want any more sad.
posted by arha at 10:32 PM on March 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Arha, let's just tell ourselves that the pig was adopted by somebody like this lovely piggy mom.

EDIT: Huh. Link doesn't seem to work, but the URL does. Here's the URL: http://youtu.be/nbOUXueonM4?t=2m41s.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 1:50 AM on March 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oh God, please give me the strength to stop... eating... BACON. Why did such adorable little animals have to be so damn delicious?

The moment I decided to stop eating meat was when I was reading a thing about the treatment of animals in the meat production industry, and there was one example of something a worker had done to a pig that was my point of no return because it upset me so much. I always loved bacon and thought it was the thing I'd miss the most (and don't get me wrong, if I smell some smoked bacon sizzling on the pan there is drool) but I have never again thought about actually eating it. Come to me, little piggies, I am your friend :)
posted by billiebee at 2:23 AM on March 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


Sleeping pig wakes up for a cookie

And yeah a critical mass of cute videos ignited by a copy of the Veganomicon pretty much turned me vegan so there
posted by Gymnopedist at 8:08 PM on March 6, 2015


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