Seven Foot Tall Talking Carrot
April 4, 2015 7:01 AM   Subscribe

posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 7:22 AM on April 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

Sweetums didn't crack the top five? That's some bull hockey right there.
posted by eamondaly at 7:27 AM on April 4, 2015 [7 favorites]

Is there a more tragic TV character than Mr. Johnson? I always felt so bad for the poor guy. Grover is a monster indeed.
posted by The Gooch at 7:36 AM on April 4, 2015 [5 favorites]

Whilst I'm pleased to see serious research going into this endeavour, I must agree with my learned colleague: Sweetums was robbed.
posted by arcticseal at 7:44 AM on April 4, 2015

Uncle Deadly should have been higher. This list is a sham.
posted by GameDesignerBen at 8:16 AM on April 4, 2015 [3 favorites]

While the Swedish Chef no doubt deserves a place on this list, Floyd Pepper was robbed. One of the most important things about the Muppets is how much each one's physical features added together to form a rich, complex character. Beaker's down turned mouth told us much about what was going on inside the poor guy's head. Miss Piggy's blow dried hair and false eyelashes told us what kind of woman she was. Dr. Teeth's wide smile and gold tooth conjured visions of magic and psychedelia and a carefree attitude about the world. Mr. Johnson works because in real life we *all* know that guy with the crown of thick hair around a bald dome and a never-was-cool-anywhere moustache, he was our high school principal or the head of the company's maintenance department and we project *so much* onto that character to flesh him out.

With the Swedish Chef, it wasn't the 'stache, it was the eyebrows, the lack of visible eyes, the swirling hand movements, and of course the language.

Floyd Pepper, all you need to know about that guy, is the aviator glasses and those side burns. From that alone you can tell what instrument he plays, what kind of beer he drinks, what kind of car he drives, where he lives, what his relationship with his lady is like, how old he is, and what time period he came of age. All from a handful of wavy strands glued to his face.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:23 AM on April 4, 2015 [15 favorites]

And looking back, Floyd wasn't even wearing what looks like mirrored aviators in the picture, my brain just inserted that because that's what a dude like him would wear.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:28 AM on April 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

Floyd Pepper is basically just Duane Allman with a hat.
posted by Sys Rq at 8:56 AM on April 4, 2015 [3 favorites]

This list is missing WWE’s Sheamus (who is, canonically, a Muppet).
posted by nicepersonality at 9:22 AM on April 4, 2015 [4 favorites]

What a wonderful list! Also, I didn't understand it was a pun until I started studying film in college, but Traveling Matt is probably one of my very favorite puns of all time.
posted by Greg Nog at 9:32 AM on April 4, 2015 [4 favorites]

First, learn to spell "complement," you hipster fucktards, and second, Crosscut Doozer is gay. Sexy gay daddy muppet.
posted by ethnomethodologist at 9:41 AM on April 4, 2015 [3 favorites]

Gables should be on this list, with his sparkly beard.
posted by limeonaire at 10:35 AM on April 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

posted by fluffy battle kitten at 12:44 PM on April 4, 2015 [3 favorites]

Um, is there a zero? Because Bert deserves to have the top spot.
posted by pjenks at 7:12 PM on April 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

How is Jim Henson not on this list?
posted by Sphinx at 8:24 PM on April 4, 2015 [1 favorite]

The Muppets, glory be and bless Jim Henson forever, they made puppetry cool. Henson breathed fresh air into the puppetry scene. He took the best of twentieth-century puppet design and applied it to American sketch comedy, and with the Muppets team developed technical innovations in how puppetry was staged for television and for film.

Some friends and I started a puppetry ensemble around the time The Muppet Show began screening in Oz. Good timing, sheer luck. We didn't imitate them and we didn't start our company because of them, but their popularity was a big help to us getting off the ground. They grew the audience for puppetry, young and old.

Also, watching Sesame St. at the motel in the morning before a school gig got us in the mood.
posted by valetta at 10:29 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]

This list needs the bearded vocalist from Jerry & the Monotones' version of Telephone Rock ("You'll be the receiver of all my love."). You just know Henson partied with dudes that looked just like that.
posted by jonp72 at 1:05 PM on April 5, 2015

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