Furious 7
April 5, 2015 12:10 AM   Subscribe

Already well on its way to a monster opening box office, Furious 7 is the latest installment in the little franchise[1] that could: ridiculous, more diverse than just about anything else coming out of Hollywood, and beloved by critics like Roxane Gay and Todd VanDerWerff. But in the end it's all about family[2]. (And occasionally cars.)

[1] The F&F-verse actually includes Justin Lin's first movie Better Luck Tomorrow, via pivotal franchise character Han Seoul-Oh.

[2] A somber cloud over everything is of course the death of Paul Walker. Vin Diesel recently revealed that his newborn daughter Pauline is named after his long-time friend. Walker's brothers and CGI were used to finish the film.
posted by kmz (97 comments total) 23 users marked this as a favorite
 
My beloved TFAF! Fast Five is obviously the apotheosis of cinema, but Furious 7 was a similar slice of fried gold. My franchise: passes the Bechdel test with a scene involving a fist fight in full-length evening gowns. Your fave could never.

Lovely seeing Noel Gugliemi and other references back to the original. Iggy Azalea's appearance is unfortunate but unlike Ja Rule I'm sure she wont be asked back.
posted by Gin and Broadband at 12:28 AM on April 5, 2015 [8 favorites]




3 (Tokyo Drift), 5, 6, 1, 4, 2 (haven't seen 7 yet).

Three is like a doctoral thesis on movies made where the setting is Japan, but the writers/designers/directors got their idea of Japan by watching other movies made in the same vein (Seriously, Black Rain, The Hunted, these are masterpieces). Everything about Tokyo Drift is an absurdity. Taken together, they come together to make a Voltron (ironically, the lions, not the cars, because the cars were stupid)of ridiculousness, and form a Blazing Sword of silliness. The disgraced alcoholic dad somehow managing to have an apartment in one of the most expensive areas in town, and the apartment itself being comically large (and far from any US base he'd be working at) for anyone affiliated with the army. The lobster for lunch from the school cafeteria. Drifting through Shibuya Crossing without ending up with hundreds dead or maimed (also, that people look up from their phones to notice the cars drifting by). And, of course, the idea that Sonny Chiba would listen to our hero instead of ripping him limb from limb.

If people ask what it's like living in Japan, I tell them it's exactly like F&F 3.
posted by Ghidorah at 1:33 AM on April 5, 2015 [42 favorites]


Am I the only one who thought the first Fast and the Furious was simply a remake of Point Break with cars instead of waves?
posted by kisch mokusch at 1:48 AM on April 5, 2015 [10 favorites]


Vin Diesel is a D&D fan? Huh.
posted by cromagnon at 2:25 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Did someone say D&D?
posted by rewil at 2:30 AM on April 5, 2015 [5 favorites]


Let me just say Han + Gisele gets an A++ from me for an asian dude ending up with the pretty lady.
posted by juv3nal at 2:39 AM on April 5, 2015 [6 favorites]


I was literally playing Dungeons and Dragons with Judi Dench and Karl Urban at nights after shooting. I will tell you that I was showing her Dungeons and Dragons books and showing her the different properties of Elementals.”
posted by Elementary Penguin at 3:53 AM on April 5, 2015 [30 favorites]


Han and Gisele gets a "didn't really happen" from my wife for Han ending up with a pretty lady, who isn't her.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 3:59 AM on April 5, 2015 [7 favorites]


I love these movies so much. That is all.
posted by hydropsyche at 5:09 AM on April 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


This new one is way too soapy for my taste, but it has some fun stunts.
posted by fairmettle at 5:24 AM on April 5, 2015


I haven't seen the newest one, but the rest are great. Cheesy, but great. The diversity of the cast is huge -- it shows just how inexcusably whitebread most hollywood movies are -- and the plots wear the cheesiness right on their sleeve.
posted by Dip Flash at 5:32 AM on April 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


I feel a weird sort of shame that I can watch these movies and enjoy them when I know just how much carnage the heroes would actually unleash on people just trying to live their lives (I used to have an anti-fun job in an insurance company compiling major car accident reports first thing every day).

About a year after FF1 was in the theaters a street racer accident occurred on the major intersection right near where I grew up. Resulted in a flipped SUV and a stillborn baby. Before FF1 road racing in the area I grew up in typically stuck to roads that were mostly unused at night such as in industrial parks. Almost immediately after the 'sport' blew up and they moved to the minor highways in the suburbs with some awful consequences. I still remember the sound of the air ambulance hovering almost directly over my house and thinking something horrific must have happened.

While the causal chain is probably impossible to prove the association in my mind is there every time these movies come out and it is far stronger than any of the gun play movies being associated with shootings for some reason. Yet I still watch and enjoy them and feel a bit callous for it.
posted by srboisvert at 5:51 AM on April 5, 2015 [8 favorites]


Am I the only one who thought the first Fast and the Furious was simply a remake of Point Break with cars instead of waves?

No? That was a pretty common reading of the first film. Also probably one of the reasons it did so well.

I watched the first F&F when it came out in the theaters and loved in all its cheesy gloriousness. Haven't seen any of the others. Should I get caught up before seeing FF7 or can I go in blind?

Bill Simmons had Wesley Morris on his podcast recently and they were discussing the F&F franchise. Morris remarked how he thought this last film was silent-film quality good, in terms of stunts and delivering pure cinema. I loved that reading of it -- this is Buster Keaton for Millenials!
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 6:07 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Am I the only one who thought the first Fast and the Furious was simply a remake of Point Break with cars instead of waves?

Of course not, I'm pretty sure they did it on purpose. Like, the whole pitch for the movie was, "Point Break with cars."

I would even believe that Paul Walker was Keanu Reeve's long lost brother.

I think I'm going to watch them both back-to-back today.
posted by VTX at 6:29 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


(Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates : I watched the first F&F when it came out in the theaters and loved in all its cheesy gloriousness. Haven't seen any of the others. Should I get caught up before seeing FF7 or can I go in blind?

Well, you could watch FF7 and maybe enjoy it, but to really appreciate it properly you need to watch, at the very least, 5 & 6.

Without seeing the others you just don't get the emotion. That final scene.

.
RIP Paul Walker
posted by Fence at 6:31 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Should I get caught up before seeing FF7 or can I go in blind?

You can watch them out of order, but there is a shift from the first few films to the later ones where they go from being about racing and some crime to a series of heists performed by a makeshift family of Robin Hoods who all love driving very fast. Watching that family develop is part of what I really like about the movies. It's amazing that a big budget action series can be so enjoyable and have such diversity. The podcast How Did This Get Made? Has some entertainingIMO episodes about the series with Adam Scott.
posted by callistus at 6:35 AM on April 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


Those of you doing a rewatch, check out FanFare.
posted by Ik ben afgesneden at 7:28 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


The best thing about these movies is imagining the apple crate Vin Disnel is standing on to get him into the same shot as Dwayne Johnson
posted by The Whelk at 7:30 AM on April 5, 2015 [22 favorites]


I very excitedly saw F7 yesterday and it exceeded my expectations. I have some friends who get it, and a few who make fun of me when I wax poetic about my love for the series. Every new movie has to out-do the ones before, and I'm not sure how they could ever top F7 (and of course the death of Paul Walker makes it hard for anything to come next - the bromance between Brian and Dom is integral to the series).

My only minor complaint about the new one is that there are a LOT of objectified women in ridiculously skimpy clothes with reeeeaaaallly creepy camera angles and movements, even for an F&F installment. I can easily overlook it in most of the films but this one has seemingly more than usual in the first 20-30 minutes or so and it was a little "ok, we get it, can we move on from the crotch shots now?"
posted by misskaz at 7:32 AM on April 5, 2015 [7 favorites]


So, are they keeping all the good stuff in this time, as promised in the American Dad episode "American Stepdad"?
posted by Sys Rq at 7:36 AM on April 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


Gaze-y crotch shots are better than a second coconut bonk to the head for curing amnesia. It's Racing Neuroscience!
posted by Drastic at 7:38 AM on April 5, 2015


The Fast And The Furious Would Be Nothing If Vin Diesel Weren’t A Huge Nerd: talks about some of the business behind funding the films.

I'm still waiting for someone to remake The Lost Boys with cars instead of vampires. Although Vin Diesel would make a poor Kiefer Sutherland replacement.
posted by Nelson at 7:43 AM on April 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


Helen Mirren wants to be in F&F 8

Fast £ Furious 8: Granny Shifting
posted by a lungful of dragon at 7:46 AM on April 5, 2015 [4 favorites]


The opening of Furious 7 might be my favorite action movie opening ever. It's a perfect two minutes of exposition, characterization, and foreshadowing that gave me chills.
posted by eamondaly at 7:56 AM on April 5, 2015


How is Ronda Rousy in 7? Gina Carano was amazing in 6, and I'm really sad to see her replaced.

Also, 5 sucked. Not nearly enough racing. The 2 main scenes were great, but between them it kinda digressed into generic action filler.

Somehow 6 fixed that. The fight scenes between the racing ones were AMAZING, I dunno how much of that was Carano, and how much was the choreography. Walkers 1v3 in a prison cell was almost as good as the subway footchase.

Great stuff! Can't wait to see Hobbs saying ridiculous lines and walking out of elevators sideways in 7!
posted by butterstick at 7:57 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Unfortunately, butterstick, Rousey is a not a good actress. Her fight scene is obviously badass, but her scowl looks more like a pout and the two lines she had to utter she did so, IMO, poorly. This makes me worried about WWE courting her.
posted by misskaz at 8:01 AM on April 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


I am not alone in my love of FF3 (Tokyo Drift)! It's my favorite of the series (haven't seen FF7 yet) because as Ghidorah above so eloquently points out, the movie doesn't care one bit about any kind of verisimilitude. It's just a gigantic glob of cheese, but very very fun, and of course the drift cars.

Thanks to FF3 and Shirobako, this is how I'll imagine everybody in Tokyo drives.
posted by needled at 8:01 AM on April 5, 2015 [4 favorites]


Just remember, over 170mph the cops stop chasing you and go home...
posted by sammyo at 8:05 AM on April 5, 2015


Oh thank God. I honestly thought I was the only one who loved Tokyo Drift over all others.

They are all beautiful and precious wonderful darlings of cinema, but Tokyo Drift always has my heart. Whether it's Lucas Black's filthy drawl (but I can't bring myself to watch NCIS: New Orleans, no matter how much of a crush I have on him) or Sung Kang's laconic attitude or that final "I always like American muscle" from Vin Diesel...

It's so ridiculous I can't help but love it.
posted by Katemonkey at 8:07 AM on April 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


I still want the next F&F film to crossover with Overdrift.
posted by Drastic at 8:07 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Also, I second misskaz' observation about the way way over-the-top female objectification in that first half-hour. And if you're going to go there, could you not even make an attempt at balancing the scales with some topless dudes cracking lug nuts or wiping their furrowed, sweaty brows or something?

MINOR SPOILERS:
F7 was incredibly exciting and literally put me on the edge of my seat more than once, but the gender inequity throughout was a significant and disappointing step back from F6, I thought. One of the few female characters is literally referred to as "the football" and is tossed around during one action sequence. Another wins a race, but only because a man tells her how. And a third stays home with the kids, but sends her husband to do what needs to be done. Disappointing.
posted by eamondaly at 8:17 AM on April 5, 2015 [6 favorites]


Pretty sure most know this, but the chronological order for the films is: BLT, TF&TF, 2F2F, FF4, F5, F&F6, TF&TF3:TD, F7.

I've watched all of them in the theater and will continue to support the franchise as one of the best guilty pleasures of my life. It's pretty drastic how much of the cast is culled after 7, though. It really won't be the same. Hopefully it re-ignites, much like when Dwayne Johnson showed up for F5 as Franchise Viagra.
posted by linux at 8:27 AM on April 5, 2015 [6 favorites]


How is Ronda Rousy in 7? Gina Carano was amazing in 6, and I'm really sad to see her replaced.

I'm waiting for Hollywood to call Kinessa Johnson, Poacher Hunter. (first link may have a sprinkling of slightly NSFW underpants/butt pix, but mostly harmless).

I'm sure the F&F writers could work anti-poaching into the script, it's like hunting Nazis.
posted by sidereal at 8:55 AM on April 5, 2015


I'm not a big F&F fan, though I like it when things explode. So I hope you don't mind a bit of an outsider's perspective...

Fast Five is obviously the apotheosis of cinema

Now, this is an interesting theory. I don't mean to be unnecessarily combative, but let me ask you a simple question:

How many people did Gina Carano beat up in 5? Is it... zero? THE PROSECUTION RESTS.

Personally, the apotheosis of cinema is, for all its terrible problems, True Lies, because it is the first movie that turns itself up to 11 by presenting us with a thermonuclear explosion for no better reason than to serve as a backdrop to a kiss. It's the only way to be sure.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:13 AM on April 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


i think i got a headache from all the crying i did at the end. it was possibly the best ending they could give in-verse, when the opportunities for drama was ever-present in every setpiece involving Brian.

F5 was definitely my favourite of the latter era F&F, because I won't lie, 2F2F* is my greatest favourite and I was beyond excited that Rome and Tej came back. It's unbelievable how much F5 worked, and a lot of it was from the earned goodwill.

*mind you, I haven't seen Tokyo Drift, even though that installment is the one with the most earwormy single -- there's a cantonese wedding custom where bridesmaids set out challenges for the groomsmen as they try to clear the path for the groom to the bride, and one of my friends' gang had the groomsmen either perform Tokyo Drift, or the Titanic song as one of the challenges in her wedding.
posted by cendawanita at 9:19 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


How Did This Get Made podcast have devoted two episodes to this series: Fast Five, Fast & Furious 6. They are both very entertaining and worth listening. I can't wait to watch this film. I enjoy that the actors/film-makers have both embraced the silliness of their own franchise and just have fun with it. Turn your brain off for a while and enjoy the ride.
posted by Fizz at 9:31 AM on April 5, 2015


Sorry, but the best track in Tokyo Drift is, without question, the Mos Def remix of DJ Shadow's Six Days. So good the franchise used it twice.
posted by eamondaly at 9:32 AM on April 5, 2015 [5 favorites]


this is why i clearly need to catch up and watch the movie! XD all i know is the single from the heavy radio rotation.
posted by cendawanita at 9:34 AM on April 5, 2015


I loved 4-6 and was extremely excited for 7, but it fell flat for me for a number of reasons, not the least of which was the regressive approach to gender along with the decreased level of magical realism (though not extreme impossibility) within the action sequences. Justin Lin was really the keystone of the franchise's resurgence.

On reflection, drinking a quarter of a bottle of Jameson and falling asleep midway through may have also been a contributing factor to my disappointment.
posted by grumpybear69 at 9:52 AM on April 5, 2015


It's been many years since I saw the Fast and the Furious, but my memory tells me that it was about street racing and that it bored me utterly (cars, explosions, women as props). Is my characterization unfair? Am I just not meant to watch this franchise? Or is there something I'm missing?
posted by Radiophonic Oddity at 9:57 AM on April 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


The franchise evolved from a B-movie about street racing with a Point Break plot into a mega-action blockbuster with set pieces involving cars used in heists.
posted by linux at 10:09 AM on April 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


It's been many years since I saw the Fast and the Furious, but my memory tells me that it was about street racing and that it bored me utterly (cars, explosions, women as props). Is my characterization unfair? Am I just not meant to watch this franchise? Or is there something I'm missing?

I felt the same way as you did. Until one fateful Saturday two years ago when How Did This Get Made did something unorthodox in roasting a flick that had just come out that weekend: Fast 6. Their giddy excitement over the ridiculousness of it all made me take notice and give the series another chance and I am glad I did, because as far as I'm concerned this is the best superhero franchise going right now.
posted by Senor Cardgage at 10:12 AM on April 5, 2015 [6 favorites]


I try to explain it to those who ask "Isn't it just dumb people in ridiculous cars?" like so: The series as a whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Any one of the movies is a mostly dumb popcorn movie with either cars or explosions or heists or some combination of the above. But together they tell a compelling story about a group of misfit but badass friends that consider themselves family. They live by a code and are generally good people while also kicking ass and getting revenge. It's hard to explain. The weirdness that came about due to the rebooting of the series, jumping back in time to add newer movies and their storylines to the back-canon, leads to a lot of interesting layering of exposition and foreshadowing too. Plus you get all the ridiculous physics-defying action sequences and cheesy lines and "fuck yeah, the good guys win!" moments.
posted by misskaz at 10:16 AM on April 5, 2015 [5 favorites]


I like the structure, which was the action version of the structure used for porn, except, instead of ever scene just being a lead-in to an unlikely sex scene, they were lead ins to "fuck yeah" scenes that try to top each other.

The film isn't really about family. It's about how anyone who comes within Vin Diesel's orbit, if he isn't actively street fighting them, gets identified as family. The Rock is part of that group now, and just a few films ago The Rock was throwing Vin Diesel through walls. Vin Diesel has a very simple understanding of the world, but, man, he sells it.

The extended goodbye to Paul Walker was nice, but if the films had ended with the words "Half the proceeds of this film will go to support the preservation of biodiversity in America's oceans in Paul Walker's name," I would have wept.
posted by maxsparber at 10:18 AM on April 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


I love them all! Even Tokyo Drift, though the Sean character in that one could have used some more charm and and a time machine to look a little younger. I feel like having the White Guy in that one was like having Piper in Orange is the New Black... its a way to sell the movie to producers and get people in the door so we can have Han, bow wow and DK being great.

I've been re-watching the whole series all year with my friends just to get stoked. Everybody is so baby-faced in the first one.
posted by captaincrouton at 11:05 AM on April 5, 2015


Helen Mirren wants to be in F&F 8

Well, RED and RED 2 are certainly F&F-y enough ....

It's pretty drastic how much of the cast is culled after 7, though.

.... to be the prequels for a merging of the two universes.
posted by dhartung at 11:33 AM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


I haven't watched these, but I did watch Drive Hard recently (had to: John Cusack), and it really wasn't anything worth recounting. To make a series of car movies that people actually watch and develop this kind of following is its own kind of impressive.
posted by limeonaire at 12:04 PM on April 5, 2015


I'm in the middle of a binge-watching "Fastival" to catch up on the films before I see F7, and in the process I've been reading a lot about Vin Diesel. He is a very, very interesting guy.

There's the aforementioned D&D fandom. He's also famously private and shies from doing most all normal celeb stuff. What I find really cool is how he got his big break: for writing, directing, and starring in a 20 minute semi-autobiographical short film Multi-Facial, which is about his frustrations with trying to make it as an "ethnically ambiguous" actor. It's really good and worth a watch.
posted by joechip at 12:05 PM on April 5, 2015 [5 favorites]


It really is amazing that a mid-budget Point Break ripoff somehow became the country's biggest (in more ways than one) action series down the line. So bizarre. And it's wonderfully earnest! Candy-colored, sentimental, utterly lacking in irony or cynicism... I love it! Also, this was me a few years ago:

"Holy shit, I don't think I could be more enthusiastic about this movie!"

*they cast Kurt Russell*

scanners-head-explosion.gif
posted by brundlefly at 12:22 PM on April 5, 2015 [4 favorites]


I mean, hell. The first film centered around hijacking trucks to steal electronics.

The climax of the sixth film had the crew using car-mounted harpoons to bring down a cargo plane so they could recover a military microchip.
posted by brundlefly at 12:26 PM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]




I started watching the Fast and Furious movies recently after my brother pointed out they are a 7-film franchise that has earned billions of dollars and has a cast comprised almost entirely of people of color. I have watched them completely out of order -- started with Tokyo Drift, then watched 6, and I'm partway through 2 -- and have discovered to my surprise that Tyrese Gibson is a gifted comic actor. in 6 in particular he has several laugh-out-loud moments. Is the acting uneven? Yes. Does the appearance of Gina Carano make it intensely obvious how different the build is between a woman who does stunt fighting on set vs. a woman who actually fights? Oh yes. Is it a little disconcerting when the most subtle acting performance in your movie is put on by The Rock? Yes. But I love them.
posted by KathrynT at 1:20 PM on April 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


Did someone say Wesley Morris?
If you reach back to 2001, you’ll see the list of top-grossing movies has recurrently featured a hit series whose nod to diversity goes far beyond sassy neighbors, illiterate linebackers, or Will Smith. It’s a collection of movies that in its Utopian way puts blacks, whites, Asians, Hispanics, and their various combinations on equal footing. It would be like a grown-up “Sesame Street,” except for the deadly road races, and the fact that the puppets have tattoos, guns, muscles, bald heads, and a ton of moving violations.
posted by pxe2000 at 1:22 PM on April 5, 2015 [5 favorites]


to steal electronics.

CRT TVs with built-in VCRs.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 3:32 PM on April 5, 2015 [4 favorites]


The talk of the music in Tokyo Drift reminded me of one of the things I genuinek enjoyed about the movie: there were actual Japanese songs on the soundtrack of an American movie set in Japan. Songs that were current and didn't suck. It kind of messes with my theory about the "no idea how Japan really is" thing, but yeah, the soundtrack was done well.
posted by Ghidorah at 3:33 PM on April 5, 2015


Unfortunately, butterstick, Rousey is a not a good actress. Her fight scene is obviously badass, but her scowl looks more like a pout

s'ok she does that in the ring too
posted by butterstick at 4:14 PM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


"Pretty sure most know this, but the chronological order for the films is: BLT, TF&TF, 2F2F, FF4, F5, F&F6, TF&TF3:TD, F7."

If I've never seen any of these movies, and I want to watch them all, should I watch them in that chronological order?
posted by redsparkler at 4:57 PM on April 5, 2015


I've only seen one of them but I get the feeling FF is going full Saint's Row* and I couldn't be happier about that.

I can't wait for the one where they have to tokyo drift on the moon.

*nongamers, each saint's row game is twice as silly as the previous one. Saint's row 1 and 2 were straightforward gangster does gang stuff games, saint's row 3 allowed you to get in a turf war with the government and race light cycles in the matrix, and saints row 4 elects you the president and then you punch aliens to reggae and stuff.
posted by sandswipe at 5:52 PM on April 5, 2015 [4 favorites]


Also, I second misskaz' observation about the way way over-the-top female objectification in that first half-hour. And if you're going to go there, could you not even make an attempt at balancing the scales with some topless dudes cracking lug nuts or wiping their furrowed, sweaty brows or something?

Seriously. The only problem with the series is that it's very straight, in a male-gazey sort of way.

That, and there's entirely too little Han.
posted by rewil at 6:19 PM on April 5, 2015


I've truly lost touch with "reality" if this is what's hot.
posted by rmmcclay at 6:54 PM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


If Vin Diesel is such a big fantasy fan and being the Riddick series is over, maybe it's time for him to go full sword and sorcery. God knows there's enough source material out there. And it would be better if he were not cast as some Conan-like warrior, but more of a rogue or even a sorcerer. Not Thomas Covenant but omething against type. I'd pay to see that.
posted by Ber at 7:24 PM on April 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


If I've never seen any of these movies, and I want to watch them all, should I watch them in that chronological order?

Nope, much like you shouldn't watch Star Wars in chronological order (assuming you acknowledge there are currently six movies), that's just for reference.

To get the full effect of watching the characters "develop" you watch in release order though Better Luck Tomorrow is entirely optional (it's an Asian-American Orange County indie crime drama); it just happens to be in-universe because of Han.
posted by linux at 10:07 PM on April 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


If anything, an interesting watch order would be to first see Better Luck Tomorrow and Tokyo Drift, then go in release order for the rest where the development is simply in the introduction/reintroduction of characters that show up in the subsequent film.
posted by linux at 10:54 PM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


If Vin Diesel is such a big fantasy fan and being the Riddick series is over, maybe it's time for him to go full sword and sorcery. God knows there's enough source material out there. And it would be better if he were not cast as some Conan-like warrior, but more of a rogue or even a sorcerer. Not Thomas Covenant but omething against type. I'd pay to see that.

Vin Diesel's big dream has always been a Hannibal Barca movie. No idea if/when he'll actually be able to do it.
posted by kmz at 11:34 PM on April 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


I liked what Gitesh Pandya had to say about the BO:
Let's take a step back and marvel at how this franchise, which almost went into the world of straight-to-DVD, managed to reboot itself and take a leap forward at the same time. Below is a chart of the entire franchise to date:

[chart omitted, you know what it says]

First off, the idea that an action franchise could go seven films deep is just about unheard of. But to have a franchise that makes more money as it goes along? And this isn't something that's based on a book where you know how the story ends and the excitement builds, this is an original franchise where writers have to keep coming up with bigger and bolder stunts and sequences. When Vin Diesel and the late Paul Walker decided to come back and reboot the series in 2009 with Fast & Furious, audiences forgot about the disappointment of Tokyo Drift and came roaring back to see their favorite duo teaming up once again. Each film after that upped the ante, adding previous cast members and having new ones (ie. Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson) join in the fun as well. Audiences were well primed for Furious 7 anyway, but the sudden death of Walker in 2013 added to the must-see aura of the film. The cast, crew and the studio made this a fitting tribute to Walker with fans coming out to pay their last respects, and even with a tear in their eye, had a great time seeing Walker one last time in his most famous role.

The CinemaScore was an A, meaning people loved what they saw, which could lead to strong holds over the next few weeks before The Avengers: Age of Ultron hits theaters in May. The audience was evenly split with 51% males and 49% females. And, in keeping with the multicultural nature of the cast, the audience was 37% Hispanic, 25% Caucasian, 24% African American and 10% Asian. This film literally had something for everyone.

posted by dhartung at 1:20 AM on April 6, 2015 [3 favorites]


I HATE these movies. "Let's go destroy some perfectly good 60s muscle cars."

Destroy all of the POS Veyrons and general purposes as you want to. The more of those you destroy, I'll applaud, but for christ's sake lay off the classic Chargers. I'd rather see vin diesel beaten to death than another classic 60s muscle car trashed. The world is full of vin diesels and always will be. We only have so many 69 Chargers.
posted by InsertNiftyNameHere at 2:19 AM on April 6, 2015


We only have so many 69 Chargers.
I don't know either way, but is there a reason to believe the ones destroyed are not replica shells on some random other car?
posted by juv3nal at 3:10 AM on April 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


With its extremely long nose and ridiculously high rear wing, an original 1969 Dodge Charger Daytona would be ill suited to cinematic stunt work, and at more than six figures for a good example, way too expensive. So picture car coordinator Dennis McCarthy built a variation on the Daytona with a slightly shorter nose, a slightly less elevated rear wing and slammed it over a set of custom-made 18-inch wheels wearing 275/40R18 and 315/40R18 Nitto tires.

In fact, the entire front clip of Toretto's Daytona is one piece of fiberglass fabricated at McCarthy's 20,000-square-foot shop in Sun Valley, California. Compared to a production '69 Daytona, the Toretto Daytona's nose is almost 12 inches shorter overall and somewhat taller in profile. And the movie car's nose has fixed headlights under Plexiglas covers instead of the original's pop-up units.

posted by rory at 3:28 AM on April 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


I'd rather see vin diesel beaten to death than another classic 60s muscle car trashed

"... it's worth noting that only basket cases are sacrificed in the process. They pretty much take the A-pillars, the roof, the top to the quarter panels and the floorpan. The rest is composite and aftermarket stuff."

(also note the bit about using the same well-proven powertrain in pretty much all cars)
posted by effbot at 4:19 AM on April 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


(And yeah, the embedded video has two Aussie car nerds chatting with Dennis McCarthy about the cars in FF7. Also more car closeups in the Jalopnik comments, from someone who stumbled upon a trailer full of FF7 cars.)
posted by effbot at 4:23 AM on April 6, 2015


I thought Ronda Rousey was used well. You can tell she's still figuring out acting (see also, her appearance at Wrestlemania) but her fight scene was delightful.
posted by almostmanda at 6:21 AM on April 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have really intense feelings about FatF, although I have only seen the original film (heresy, I know, I’m working on it).

The greatest thing, though, the GREATEST thing, is Vin Diesel’s Facebook. It is AMAZING. Imagine your sappiest aunt who posts inspirational messages, except your aunt is Vin Diesel. He posts things about following your dreams all the time, and fans send him their horrible fan art and he proudly shares it with all of his followers and talks about how our hearts are all connected, and it is basically the best.

Also, this morning he posted a picture from Fast 7 of Paul Walker looking at him fondly (or Brian looking at Dom fondly, I guess), and it basically made me cry. Aunt Vin Diesel is a real softy, and I love him for it.
posted by a fiendish thingy at 8:04 AM on April 6, 2015 [21 favorites]


These movies just don't do it for me but add me to the listing of folks in the Vin Diesel-as-a-human fan club.
posted by phearlez at 9:34 AM on April 6, 2015


Vin Diesel has done something very few stars ever do: be cool, lose the cool, become beloved instead.
posted by Gin and Broadband at 10:22 AM on April 6, 2015


Here's some neato behind-the-scenes footage of the practical stunt work in F7.
posted by brundlefly at 10:42 AM on April 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


Wait, they actually dropped cars out of airplanes? That wasn't just CGI?

Oh, maybe I need to give this my money.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 11:11 AM on April 6, 2015 [4 favorites]


Vin Diesel recently revealed that his newborn daughter Pauline is named after his long-time friend.

Mirroring the scene in Fast Five where a dying Vince, the childhood friend of Vin Diesel's character Dominic, tells him "You've got to meet my son. Nico. He's a good kid. You know, we named him after you."

Wait, they actually dropped cars out of airplanes?

They show one of them in that car nerd video I mentioned earlier, around 17:50. Apparently it landed successfully, but the wind caught the chute and dragged it across the desert. (not mentioned there is that a couple of chutes didn't deploy. "It's amazing what a car looks like after it hits the ground from 10,000 feet.")
posted by effbot at 12:29 PM on April 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


My thanks to juv3nal, rory, and effbot for setting straight about the cars. I feel better now that I know that.
posted by InsertNiftyNameHere at 2:55 PM on April 6, 2015


eamondaly: "the gender inequity throughout was a significant and disappointing step back from F6, I thought"

The solution is, obviously, to cast Helen Mirren in the next one. And not as a minor cameo but a full-fledged character. I've already worked out a backstory. She learned her driving skills by driving ambulances in WWII (like Queen Elizabeth did!) but then fell in with the Kray twins gang in the 1950s as a getaway driver when she was unable to find sufficiently exciting work in post-war London. She reached the pinnacle of her criminal career with either a Great Train Robbery or Italian Job (or both, why not?) style caper in the 1960s before retiring to a life of obscurity in Bermuda or something. Or maybe she got pinched by Scotland Yard and she's been in prison this whole time. Whatever the case, she comes out of retirement/prison in the next movie to join the gang, either out of revenge (if she's been in prison) or just pure adrenaline junkiedom (if she's been in retirement), depending on the exact macguffin they're chasing. Also, she prefers 1960s-era British cars (naturally), so that's classic Mini Coopers, MGBs, and/or Aston DB5s. Heck, maybe re-enact some of the old American muscle vs. Mini Cooper duels of the old British Rally series. Oh, maybe a scene where she drifts a Rolls-Royce limousine. That'd be cool, too.

I've spent way, way too much time thinking about this.
posted by mhum at 6:10 PM on April 6, 2015 [8 favorites]


To make it even weirder, Han from Tokyo Drift (the only F&F movie I've seen) actually comes from Justin Lin's unrelated film debut.
posted by Charlemagne In Sweatpants at 6:59 PM on April 6, 2015


That connection is actually mentioned in the post itself actually. But regardless, his reviews of the movies are cracking me up. For example, in the review of the 10th anniversary release of the first one:

There’s been some talk lately, some positive talk, about this series being “post-racial” and admirably diverse, the way it brings together all different races and nationalities in its cast. FAST FIVE has a super team of African-Americans, Latin Americans, Asian Americans, Puerto Ricans, Brazilians, some Samoan in The Rock, and one white guy. I would add that TOKYO DRIFT has a hick from Alabama who tries to graciously ingrain himself in Japanese culture, doesn’t drag his feet about it, doesn’t complain about having to take his shoes off.

But I gotta credit part 1 (and the Vibe article) for this approach. The street racing culture seems to be primarily Asian. You’ve got an Asian team, you’ve got a Hispanic team, and you’ve got our lead team which is 3 white guys, Jordana Brewster and Vin Diesel. They all have rivalries, sometimes with machine guns, sometimes with deadly results. But nobody ever calls anybody a racial slur, or seems like they have a problem with race, or notices it. Nobody even brings race up, it’s not about that.

This becomes more interesting when all the racers converge for a big convention that’s called “Race Wars.” That’s what they fucking call it! And you gotta wonder… didn’t they know what that sounds like? They had to’ve. Or maybe not. To them “race” means cars driving fast, what else would it mean? They’re not whites or blacks or Asians, they’re not a race, they’re people who race cars. Racists.

posted by cendawanita at 7:29 PM on April 6, 2015 [6 favorites]


mhum: I've spent way, way too much time thinking about this."

And you keep right on thinking about this type of stuff. You're way ahead of Hollywood on this. Let me know when you have your kickstarter ready to go. I'm in. Keep it up, friend!
posted by InsertNiftyNameHere at 3:52 AM on April 7, 2015


How Fast? How Furious?: a data visualization from Bloomberg. Contains other supportive charts such as "Usages of Nitrous Oxide" (and not in the Blue Velvet sense.)
posted by Nelson at 7:23 AM on April 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


I am so glad that I'm not alone in my love for this bizarre franchise. I liked the first couple as race movies, but I also inexplicably liked Torque .

But there is a shift from the first few films to the later ones where they go from being about racing and some crime to a series of heists performed by a makeshift family of Robin Hoods who all love driving very fast.

This. This is where my general, "Hey, these are fun go-fast movie!" turned to "Hey, these are ridiculous heist movies. Hells yeah!". It was a bold move to take the existing franchise and just slot it into an entirely new genera*. I realize that it makes sense from the Hollywood perspective to sticking with known quantities, but these films aren't cheap to make (anymore) and at some point, someone had to greenlight The-Street-Racers-Doing-Oceans-11. And it worked.

Other random things; Iove that when Dwayne Johnson came on board, he and Vin Diesel seemed to be in a race to see who could get bigger. The Rock won that one by becoming absurdly huge. (I believe this coincided with his return to wrestling, so that'd make sense.)

I like that, by sticking with the original cast, the romantic subplots have kept characters who are generally age appropriate, and when they did introduce a new love interest in in Fast 5, they opted for the absolutely lovely Elsa Pataky, rather than a new actress in her early 20s (not that there is anything wrong with early 20s actresses, it just seems a bit creepy to pair them with the then 44 year old Vin Diesel.)

I'm also now wildly hopeful that the'll do at least one more so that they can get Helen Mirren. It'd put the world one small step closer to the action/ buddy cop movie with her and Judi Dench that the world so desperately needs.

*: On the subject of changing movie generas and Helen Mirren, I've decided that the best way to explain the last two Die Hard movies is to just mentally change the main character from John McClane to Frank Moses, Willis' character from RED. It makes infinitely more sense. Plus, that leads to the possibility that if they do another one, Mirren could be in that as well.
posted by quin at 11:59 AM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oh, and Furious 7 has Kurt Fucking Russell in it. The rest of the movie can just be a picture of a barrel burning money, and I'd still see it.
posted by quin at 12:07 PM on April 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


I liked the first couple as race movies, but I also inexplicably liked Torque .

Not inexplicable at all. You are clearly a person of taste and distinction.
posted by brundlefly at 12:14 PM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


For anyone who has missed the series and needs to catch up, this video should bring you up to speed (har har) through to Fast Five. The original video seems to be deleted off the internet so we'll have to do with this copy.

InsertNiftyNameHere: "And you keep right on thinking about this type of stuff."

By the way, I want to mention that I also thought a bit about the chronology problems of having Dame Helen being a WWII vet but given that their version of modern-day (near future? near past?) Tokyo is oddly flip-phone-centric, I think we can make it work.
posted by mhum at 12:31 PM on April 7, 2015


Dame Helen could have taken some sort of super soldier serum that left her functionally immortal. That is not a suspension of disbelief-breaker in this franchise.
posted by brundlefly at 12:40 PM on April 7, 2015


> could you not even make an attempt at balancing the scales with some topless dudes cracking lug nuts

Or, say, removing their casts by flexing.
posted by The corpse in the library at 2:51 PM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Just import Aaron Paul from Need for Speed. Hell I'm surprised EA hasn't come out with some Fast & The Furious games. Get Criterion (the guys who went from Burnout to all the Need For Speed games) on it.
posted by Charlemagne In Sweatpants at 5:31 PM on April 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


There's been a few awful F&F tie-in games. There's also a recent stand-alone DLC for Forza Horizon 2 that looks to be pretty decent. I actually rather enjoyed Wheelman, which was sort of a rebranded F&F game complete with Vin Diesel in the main role.

Sadly, Criterion isn't really a going concern these days. They're supposedly working on some new IP but their team has been gutted by departures and transfers. Burnout Paradise is still my perfect racing game and I would give anything for a true sequel. (The Criterion Need For Speeds were OK but had no stunt runs which was one of my favorite parts.)
posted by kmz at 9:13 AM on April 8, 2015




My husband and I just finished watching the original 2001 "The Fast and The Furious" last night. Previous to this, I'd seen Tokyo Drift, and we'd both watched #6. (I told the TiVo to record the box set and we've been watching them in whatever order they came in.) Going from #6 to #1 was an interesting exercise!

#1 was recorded off of TNT, so it was edited "for length and content." They seemed to drop a couple of important plot elements on the floor in the process, but it didn't really matter to my enjoyment of the film. There were two things that really struck me about it. The first was just how dated it was, both in form and content. A major smuggling ring specializing in DVD players and digital cameras? What's next, fax machines and polio? It reminded me of Case's "two megabytes of stolen RAM" from the beginning of Neuromancer. And the weird "blur effect" they used when they were at high speed was like -- well, it was really apparent that it was a film from fourteen years ago, let's say that.

The second thing, though, was just how enjoyable and watchable the movie really was. The plot was pretty much a thin wire armature to hang as many high speed car chases as possible off of, but whatever, that's fine. And sure, I spoke Brian's last line to Dom right along with him, it was so obvious, and I called Chase's fate within two seconds of seeing him on screen, but even with the predictable formulaic nature of the movie, it was still a lot of fun. Diesel and Walker both give a performance that reads more as understated than wooden, and if the supporting characters are all a little one-note, the notes at least ring true. Going from the physics-and-reality-defying stunts of #6 to the much, MUCH more realistic car work in #1 wasn't even that much of a letdown; it's still really great driving that's shot really well, and it was very exciting to watch.

In short? Super fun movie! I am looking forward to watching the others, and to seeing #7 in the theater if we can find a dang babysitter.
posted by KathrynT at 9:01 AM on April 10, 2015


Today Now! Interviews The 5-Year-Old Screenwriter Of "Fast Five". "Jim and Tracy welcome Chris Morgan, the kindergartener who wrote the latest action-packed "Fast And The Furious" sequel."
posted by effbot at 6:21 AM on April 12, 2015


My Google Now panopticon* just alerted me of this Variety feature on Vin Diesel: 'Fast' and Heartsick

*so convenient, yet so damning of my surfing behaviour.
posted by cendawanita at 10:53 AM on April 21, 2015




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