Believe It Or Not, I'm Not Home

April 24, 2015 4:43 PM

If you happen to be in the right place at the right time, Jason Alexander will record a personalized version of his famous "Believe It Or Not, I'm Not Home" Seinfeld voicemail greeting just for you.
posted by Servo5678 (23 comments total)

I'm fully going to remember this for the next time I'm on a talk show with Jason Alexander.
posted by el io at 4:54 PM on April 24, 2015 [1 favorite]

As a pre-existing George, I should probably just go ahead and steal the original.
posted by Drinky Die at 4:56 PM on April 24, 2015

He must be so sick of taking that request. or if he's not, he's soon going to be.
posted by You Can't Tip a Buick at 5:22 PM on April 24, 2015

He truly is the greatest American hero.
posted by Sys Rq at 5:37 PM on April 24, 2015 [2 favorites]

I love how many Seinfeld plots fall apart completely if you add iPhones.
posted by EatTheWeek at 5:44 PM on April 24, 2015 [8 favorites]

I love how many Seinfeld plots fall apart completely if you add iPhones.

It's like Garfield Minus Garfield, but infinitely more autophagous.
posted by a halcyon day at 6:35 PM on April 24, 2015

I love how many Seinfeld plots fall apart completely if you add iPhones

Which is probably outnumbered by the plots you could devise with iPhones. (The One Where Kramer Builds An App That Jerry's Girlfriend Can't Download.)
posted by octobersurprise at 6:41 PM on April 24, 2015 [4 favorites]

Or George's app to map out all the best public toilets.
posted by Drinky Die at 6:44 PM on April 24, 2015 [3 favorites]

(The One Where George Spends His Lunch Breaks Looking At Porn In The Bathroom Stall.)
posted by octobersurprise at 6:46 PM on April 24, 2015

(The One Where Kramer's Map App Leads Him to the Best Reuben Sandwich One Time Which He Can Never Locate Again)

(The One Where Jerry Decides to Only Date Women He Finds Through An App Which Matches People Based On Their Favorite Breakfast Cereal)
posted by euphorb at 7:37 PM on April 24, 2015

The one where a dozen people take a video of Elaine's awkward elbows and kicks dancing and she has to go around talking them out of uploading it.

The one where Kramer's Farmville For Hire, For Hire scam mushrooms beyond his control.

The one where Frank Costanza gets hugely heated if you suggest that he shouldn't iChat while he drives, or that he shouldn't be driving.
posted by EatTheWeek at 8:13 PM on April 24, 2015

He truly is the greatest American hero.

You know, Jason Alexander doing things this is why we invented the phrase, "A real mensch".
posted by mikelieman at 10:21 PM on April 24, 2015 [1 favorite]

I think you're looking for Modern Seinfeld
posted by blue_beetle at 10:54 PM on April 24, 2015 [2 favorites]

Maybe I should've merchandised my '90s answering machine message I did to the tune of Hall & Oates' "Out of Touch":

I'm out to lunch,
I'm out to play,
I don't know enough to come in out of the rain.
I'm out of luck,
I'm out of style,
But I'll call you back in just a little while.
Talk to my phone
When you hear the tone...

But even then, I knew the song wasn't going to age well.
posted by oneswellfoop at 11:33 PM on April 24, 2015 [3 favorites]

He still embraces the George on Twitter, and I love him for that. : )
posted by SisterHavana at 12:01 AM on April 25, 2015

oneswellfoop: I knew the song wasn't going to age well.

I went and looked it up because I wondered if this was so, and I have to disagree. Which is to say that, given the choice between your “Out of Touch” message and George's “Believe It Or Not I'm Not Home,” I'd have a real hard time picking one over the other.
posted by ob1quixote at 12:20 AM on April 25, 2015

I can't believe this bothers me enough to comment on it, but "The One Where..." is Friends. Seinfeld is "The [Whatever]", so "The Bad Download", "The Reuben Sandwich" or "The Cereal App", which I realise is a lot more difficult to do a good spoof on.

Yes, I realise I'm a sad person who should get out more.

The amazing thing about Modern Seinfeld is that they devised characters so well that you really can do an episode in less than 140 characters that your mind will fill in.

Someone I worked with once used to be Jason Alexander's PA for a while. She said that a) he was the opposite of George, temperamentally; b) He had the most beautiful light operatic tenor voice. Make of that what you will.
posted by Grangousier at 3:12 AM on April 25, 2015 [6 favorites]

Now I need to change my name to Kat.
posted by 4ster at 8:39 AM on April 25, 2015 [1 favorite]

Jason Alexander -- Merrily We Roll Along - 1981 OBC - Opening Doors
posted by mikelieman at 12:48 PM on April 25, 2015 [1 favorite]

If you're going to get into Early Jason Alexander, you can't ignore his many TV commericials (so many on YouTube), especially his grand performance for McDonalds' McDLT Burger (a serious bit of Robert Preston/Harold Hill there).
posted by oneswellfoop at 2:51 PM on April 25, 2015 [2 favorites]

Grangousier: I can't believe this bothers me enough to comment on it, but "The One Where..." is Friends.

You weren't alone there. I'm happy you did it so I didn't have to though! Thanks!
posted by wyndham at 7:39 PM on April 25, 2015

Yeah, but I mean Friends used that because it was a pre-existing phrase used to describe TV episodes because nobody ever knows the actual titles. That was the joke.
posted by Drinky Die at 7:58 PM on April 25, 2015 [1 favorite]

"The Forum Pedant" -- After becoming a volunteer discussion moderator, George gets obsessed with winning arguments on the internet, while Jerry and Elaine passive-aggressively assign each other derogatory ringtones. Kramer becomes a Youtube star.
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 8:22 PM on April 25, 2015 [5 favorites]