"BECAUSE LIFE IS IN 3D"
May 22, 2015 3:53 AM Subscribe
My selfie in 3d. This may be the finest use of 3d printing possible. Gifts for everyone you know or want to know.
I am afraid I don't know whether they ship internationally - sorry!
I am afraid I don't know whether they ship internationally - sorry!
Like a 3d shit tattoo.
posted by gnuhavenpier at 3:59 AM on May 22, 2015 [10 favorites]
posted by gnuhavenpier at 3:59 AM on May 22, 2015 [10 favorites]
Coming soon to an as yet undiscovered corner of the uncanny valley...
posted by aeshnid at 4:00 AM on May 22, 2015 [9 favorites]
posted by aeshnid at 4:00 AM on May 22, 2015 [9 favorites]
I suppose the use of the word "portrait" to mean "painting or photo of the face" has been retired.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 4:06 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 4:06 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]
They said it was shallow egotism but I told them it was shallow relief.
posted by Segundus at 4:09 AM on May 22, 2015 [20 favorites]
posted by Segundus at 4:09 AM on May 22, 2015 [20 favorites]
Is it made of icing? Because that might be useful for preppers.
Caught in a tight situation with no food? You can eat you photo!
posted by asok at 4:14 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
Caught in a tight situation with no food? You can eat you photo!
posted by asok at 4:14 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
I really hope this is an elaborate joke. Because if it is then it's profound, amazing conceptual art.
posted by 0bvious at 4:17 AM on May 22, 2015 [6 favorites]
posted by 0bvious at 4:17 AM on May 22, 2015 [6 favorites]
This website is everything.
Is My Selfie in 3D a responsible company?
Yes, it is. My Selfie in 3D is an equal opportunity employer. We support our employees in every way possible and we are proud of it. Besides, we care about the environment. In the future, we will include some information about how we help NGOs, and our social and charitable activities.
Is easy! You give us money we make selfie and give to you, please give us money, just give the money and all will be answered for your problems. Give us money please now.
posted by duffell at 4:21 AM on May 22, 2015 [6 favorites]
Is My Selfie in 3D a responsible company?
Yes, it is. My Selfie in 3D is an equal opportunity employer. We support our employees in every way possible and we are proud of it. Besides, we care about the environment. In the future, we will include some information about how we help NGOs, and our social and charitable activities.
Is easy! You give us money we make selfie and give to you, please give us money, just give the money and all will be answered for your problems. Give us money please now.
posted by duffell at 4:21 AM on May 22, 2015 [6 favorites]
Only now does it become obvious that the Zaragoza Jesus fresco restoration was just an attempt at a 3d selfie.
posted by rikschell at 4:34 AM on May 22, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by rikschell at 4:34 AM on May 22, 2015 [5 favorites]
I am afraid I don't know whether they ship internationally - sorry!
No, no, quite alright, really.
posted by Halloween Jack at 4:39 AM on May 22, 2015 [5 favorites]
No, no, quite alright, really.
posted by Halloween Jack at 4:39 AM on May 22, 2015 [5 favorites]
Selfies for business - WOW FACTOR!
Nothing says professional like a Rococo style chair with a portrait of Redfoo hot glued to the top of it...
posted by jenny76 at 4:42 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
Nothing says professional like a Rococo style chair with a portrait of Redfoo hot glued to the top of it...
posted by jenny76 at 4:42 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
Because life is shit
posted by iotic at 4:53 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by iotic at 4:53 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
And what if you take a picture of your 3D selfie and then make a 3D selfie out of that?! It's 3D selfies all the way down.
posted by chavenet at 5:12 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by chavenet at 5:12 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]
I can't decide whether to scream in existential horror or submit it to Cake Wrecks
posted by DoctorFedora at 5:23 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by DoctorFedora at 5:23 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
Clearly satire. From the contact page: "If you need further assistant we have a land line number that you can call Wednesdays from 12 to 1 pm: 02036959377."
posted by CheeseDigestsAll at 5:31 AM on May 22, 2015 [6 favorites]
posted by CheeseDigestsAll at 5:31 AM on May 22, 2015 [6 favorites]
So it's like those sticker/badge things you used to bake in the oven? Only more nightmare inducing.
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 5:41 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 5:41 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
You know, the whole website is in a sort of uncanny valley, now that I think about it. Cf. Cheese's observation above with the fact that they have a fully functional cart and ordering system on their website. It is just real-looking enough that I can't quite decide whether it's real or fake. Maybe that's irony.
posted by radicalawyer at 5:48 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by radicalawyer at 5:48 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
Here's a company that will actually 3D print you.
posted by a car full of lions at 6:13 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by a car full of lions at 6:13 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]
I have a 3D printed version of my head. I laughed nervously while they were scanning me which made my mouth end up all blurry and it basically looks like a tiny purple nightmare.
posted by nev at 6:21 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by nev at 6:21 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]
They paid money to put up this website. I'm stuck on that, even if it is satire.
posted by GrapeApiary at 6:42 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by GrapeApiary at 6:42 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
Cheese's observation above with the fact that they have a fully functional cart and ordering system on their website.
I would totally eat 3D printed cheese. Especially if it was havarti with dill.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:53 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
I would totally eat 3D printed cheese. Especially if it was havarti with dill.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:53 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
7.- Can I return my Selfie?
Every Selfie is unique and for that reason My Selfie in 3D does not accept any returns. However, we are always improving our services with your help and your sugerencies.
Oh dear, my keyboard. Why do I drink coffee and read metafilter at the same time?
posted by nzero at 7:25 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
Every Selfie is unique and for that reason My Selfie in 3D does not accept any returns. However, we are always improving our services with your help and your sugerencies.
Oh dear, my keyboard. Why do I drink coffee and read metafilter at the same time?
posted by nzero at 7:25 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
The address given on the website corresponds to this company: https://www.yourvirtualofficelondon.co.uk/
posted by nzero at 7:31 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by nzero at 7:31 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
The future of headstones. Get a good 3-d photographer, now.
posted by Oyéah at 7:34 AM on May 22, 2015
posted by Oyéah at 7:34 AM on May 22, 2015
MetaFilter: We are always improving our services with your help and your sugerencies.
posted by Rock Steady at 7:42 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by Rock Steady at 7:42 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]
The worst thing about the satire/sincerity question is that I found that they existed because they put a leaflet through the door! Will post proof when home from work...
posted by fizban at 7:51 AM on May 22, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by fizban at 7:51 AM on May 22, 2015 [5 favorites]
I'm betting this is something real. It's just still in beta and only brave first adopters will take it up now. Just you wait.
posted by chavenet at 8:03 AM on May 22, 2015
posted by chavenet at 8:03 AM on May 22, 2015
Why do they all have copyright symbols on them?
I kind of want a wedding portrait one...of goatse and tubgirl.
posted by sexyrobot at 8:05 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
I kind of want a wedding portrait one...of goatse and tubgirl.
posted by sexyrobot at 8:05 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]
The painting is what makes them suck as bad as they do but I guess that is still a human task and what do you expect a human to actually do for $20 or so? Maybe if we could find some Bangladeshi women who could do a bit of shading and highlighting @ 50 cents/unit we could stay competitive.
posted by Meatbomb at 8:16 AM on May 22, 2015
posted by Meatbomb at 8:16 AM on May 22, 2015
The earring selfie took moment to sink in....and then wow.
posted by bonobothegreat at 8:40 AM on May 22, 2015
posted by bonobothegreat at 8:40 AM on May 22, 2015
So, it's nice to know H.P. Lovecraft is still alive and in business!
posted by Samizdata at 8:42 AM on May 22, 2015
posted by Samizdata at 8:42 AM on May 22, 2015
At this particular juncture I wasn't looking for a good reason to never get out of bed again, but apparently here it is.
posted by CynicalKnight at 12:15 PM on May 22, 2015
posted by CynicalKnight at 12:15 PM on May 22, 2015
All your girlfriends would like to have one!. Besides, you get two earrings for the price of one!.
posted by larrybob at 2:01 PM on May 22, 2015
posted by larrybob at 2:01 PM on May 22, 2015
Welp, that just creeped me out. I already look like a potato face live, I don't need to do this again in "3D."
posted by jenfullmoon at 4:27 PM on May 22, 2015
posted by jenfullmoon at 4:27 PM on May 22, 2015
Thing is, we've all seen Cake Wrecks and really hideous tattoos from photos. That's what makes this all too plausible.
posted by Halloween Jack at 6:33 PM on May 22, 2015
posted by Halloween Jack at 6:33 PM on May 22, 2015
The shapify.me site car full of lions links has a carousel that peek-a-boos a quite uncanny YouTube commercial.
It's like a 105-second video distilling the major themes of Being John Malkovich and Synechdoche.
posted by mistersquid at 9:57 AM on May 23, 2015
It's like a 105-second video distilling the major themes of Being John Malkovich and Synechdoche.
posted by mistersquid at 9:57 AM on May 23, 2015
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(sic)
sigh.
posted by frumiousb at 3:55 AM on May 22, 2015