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June 1, 2015 6:15 AM Subscribe
Predator: Dark Ages Templar Knights are put to the ultimate challenge, to hunt The Predator. Testing not only their skills as fighters but also their faith. Kickstarter funded fan film. IMDB. Facebook page.
Looks neat!
posted by Smart Dalek at 6:38 AM on June 1, 2015
posted by Smart Dalek at 6:38 AM on June 1, 2015
Looks nifty, but they are TOTALLY ignoring a critical part of the fluff - Those locations looked WAY too cool. Predators like heat. Hotter the better. If you are going to borrow a well-established IP, you really need to work within the rules of said IP. What next - Judge Dredd with no armor, no bike, and a stick? Warhammer 40K without power armor?
posted by Samizdata at 6:45 AM on June 1, 2015
posted by Samizdata at 6:45 AM on June 1, 2015
Didn't the first AvP take place in Antarctica?
posted by shakespeherian at 7:15 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by shakespeherian at 7:15 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
In a prehistoric Mayan temple underneath Antarctica - wouldn't be surprised if the script had dinosaurs at some point.
posted by Artw at 7:17 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by Artw at 7:17 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
They're doing something right because I got all angry and holler-y at the screen about how the dude was swinging his sword... and spinning, you don't spin in a sword fight! It's a duel to the death, not a dance contest! And predator, seriously: against crossbows and swords, maybe not so much with the cloak.
If they've already achieved horror-movie level engagement, they've got something solid there.
posted by fatbird at 7:28 AM on June 1, 2015
If they've already achieved horror-movie level engagement, they've got something solid there.
posted by fatbird at 7:28 AM on June 1, 2015
shakespeherian: "Didn't the first AvP take place in Antarctica?"
If there had been any AvP movies...
posted by Samizdata at 7:32 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
If there had been any AvP movies...
posted by Samizdata at 7:32 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
Easily handwaved away samizdata - just assume this is the predator equivalent of ice-fishing. A niche hobby within a hobby. Doesn't AvP establish that there are different predator tribes? I bet one tribe probably is into hunting in cold uncomfortable places just to be badass, or whatever.
posted by Wretch729 at 7:33 AM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by Wretch729 at 7:33 AM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
Combinatorics!
posted by boo_radley at 7:35 AM on June 1, 2015
posted by boo_radley at 7:35 AM on June 1, 2015
Alien: If this thing gets to earth humans are doomed.
Aliens: If these things gets to earth humans are doomed.
Aliens 3 + 4: Same.
AvP: Surprise, everybody!
AvP2: Well at least that was contained underground and isolated by hundreds of miles of ice and OH WHAT IN THE SHITTING HELL.
posted by Artw at 7:37 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
Aliens: If these things gets to earth humans are doomed.
Aliens 3 + 4: Same.
AvP: Surprise, everybody!
AvP2: Well at least that was contained underground and isolated by hundreds of miles of ice and OH WHAT IN THE SHITTING HELL.
posted by Artw at 7:37 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
Wretch729: "Easily handwaved away samizdata - just assume this is the predator equivalent of ice-fishing. A niche hobby within a hobby. Doesn't AvP establish that there are different predator tribes? I bet one tribe probably is into hunting in cold uncomfortable places just to be badass, or whatever."
Nope. Can't handwave it away to me. Ain't gonna happen. I think it is cute you guys thought there were AvP movies. Those were NumerousShinyBlackDumbAliens versus FewNonshinyGreenSmart(but really dumb)Aliens movies.
posted by Samizdata at 7:41 AM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
Nope. Can't handwave it away to me. Ain't gonna happen. I think it is cute you guys thought there were AvP movies. Those were NumerousShinyBlackDumbAliens versus FewNonshinyGreenSmart(but really dumb)Aliens movies.
posted by Samizdata at 7:41 AM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
Amazing production for such a small outlay. Wonder how long it took them to film?
Helicopter shots used to be the signifier of the big budget Hollywood extravaganza, but now you can create incredible shots with nothing more than a drone and a lightweight HD camera. The props were also really well done - I'm guessing they used the kit from some local re-enactors?
The weak point for me was the fight choreography; I suspect that needed more filming time than they really had.
posted by pharm at 7:48 AM on June 1, 2015
Helicopter shots used to be the signifier of the big budget Hollywood extravaganza, but now you can create incredible shots with nothing more than a drone and a lightweight HD camera. The props were also really well done - I'm guessing they used the kit from some local re-enactors?
The weak point for me was the fight choreography; I suspect that needed more filming time than they really had.
posted by pharm at 7:48 AM on June 1, 2015
The Dark Horse comics are all canon, except the ones I don't like.
posted by Artw at 7:48 AM on June 1, 2015 [6 favorites]
posted by Artw at 7:48 AM on June 1, 2015 [6 favorites]
Looks nifty, but they are TOTALLY ignoring a critical part of the fluff - Those locations looked WAY too cool.
Ahem
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 7:51 AM on June 1, 2015
Ahem
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 7:51 AM on June 1, 2015
I thought it was Predator, Predator 2 and then Predators.
This AvP you speak of? Tell me of your homeworld, Usul.
posted by Major Matt Mason Dixon at 7:57 AM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
This AvP you speak of? Tell me of your homeworld, Usul.
posted by Major Matt Mason Dixon at 7:57 AM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
The weak point for me was the fight choreography; I suspect that needed more filming time than they really had.
Here in Vancouver, we have Academie Duello, a western martial arts school whose origin is apparently stage fighting classes that got expanded into a general offering. They still offer stage fighting, and I've seen instructors working one on one with people, doing fight choreography (they just expanding their offerings into fitness and kids programs and general competition stuff). I'm sure there's more around, but maybe that's part of what the kickstarter will fund.
posted by fatbird at 8:01 AM on June 1, 2015
Here in Vancouver, we have Academie Duello, a western martial arts school whose origin is apparently stage fighting classes that got expanded into a general offering. They still offer stage fighting, and I've seen instructors working one on one with people, doing fight choreography (they just expanding their offerings into fitness and kids programs and general competition stuff). I'm sure there's more around, but maybe that's part of what the kickstarter will fund.
posted by fatbird at 8:01 AM on June 1, 2015
I loved AvP and idgaf what anyone else says, it's a horror action movie that combines my two favourite franchises in which the hero character is a black lady.
posted by poffin boffin at 8:02 AM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 8:02 AM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
The first AvP was passable, but the second one?
Good lord almighty that's a big fat mess.
posted by Major Matt Mason Dixon at 8:08 AM on June 1, 2015
Good lord almighty that's a big fat mess.
posted by Major Matt Mason Dixon at 8:08 AM on June 1, 2015
I know it's a fan film with a tiny budget, but a Predator vs knights film would work much better in the Crusaders. Have them show up at the siege of Jerusalem. Lots of heat and fighting to attract the Predators, and you get both medieval knights and Saracens for them to fight (aka not just a lot of white dudes)
posted by thecjm at 8:16 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by thecjm at 8:16 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
I loved AvP and idgaf what anyone else says, it's a horror action movie odd couple buddy cop movie that combines my two favourite franchises in which the hero character is a black lady.
see: the part where hero lady and the predator jump away from an explosion in slow motion, and then I'm pretty sure they high fived but I can't remember because ugh what a turd
posted by FatherDagon at 8:34 AM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
see: the part where hero lady and the predator jump away from an explosion in slow motion, and then I'm pretty sure they high fived but I can't remember because ugh what a turd
posted by FatherDagon at 8:34 AM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
Another 48 Aliens
posted by FatherDagon at 8:35 AM on June 1, 2015 [9 favorites]
posted by FatherDagon at 8:35 AM on June 1, 2015 [9 favorites]
If you're looking for awesome Predator stories, you check out the currently-running Archie vs. Predator miniseries. Yes, that Archie, beloved wholesome Riverdale teen.
It's hardcore.
posted by Sangermaine at 8:42 AM on June 1, 2015 [4 favorites]
It's hardcore.
posted by Sangermaine at 8:42 AM on June 1, 2015 [4 favorites]
They chose ... poorly.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 8:46 AM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by GallonOfAlan at 8:46 AM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
Those locations looked WAY too cool. Predators like heat. Hotter the better.
Well maybe this particular Predator was a...
[sunglasses]
...stone-cold killer.
posted by cortex at 8:51 AM on June 1, 2015 [4 favorites]
Well maybe this particular Predator was a...
[sunglasses]
...stone-cold killer.
posted by cortex at 8:51 AM on June 1, 2015 [4 favorites]
check out the currently-running Archie vs. Predator miniseries.
And if you like that check out No Mercy by the same writer, which also starts with a bunch of happy smiling kids and this bit of faux social media.
OH GOD THOSE POOR KIDS.
posted by Artw at 8:59 AM on June 1, 2015
And if you like that check out No Mercy by the same writer, which also starts with a bunch of happy smiling kids and this bit of faux social media.
OH GOD THOSE POOR KIDS.
posted by Artw at 8:59 AM on June 1, 2015
Ha, I just knew Bad Omen guy was gonna buy it first.
posted by BurntHombre at 9:07 AM on June 1, 2015
posted by BurntHombre at 9:07 AM on June 1, 2015
I loved AvP and idgaf what anyone else says, it's a horror action movie that combines my two favourite franchises in which the hero character is a black lady.
The hero character is a black lady and nobody cares.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:15 AM on June 1, 2015
The hero character is a black lady and nobody cares.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:15 AM on June 1, 2015
I saw the original Predator movie for the first time a couple weeks back and it was horrible and strangely boring. I don't get it, maybe I need to watch the others.
posted by Matt Oneiros at 9:54 AM on June 1, 2015
posted by Matt Oneiros at 9:54 AM on June 1, 2015
Wouldn't bother. If it's not for you it's not for you, the other movies won't help.
posted by Artw at 9:56 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by Artw at 9:56 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
no you should definitely watch predators because of adrien brody's majestic nostrils, the true star(s) of the film
posted by poffin boffin at 10:02 AM on June 1, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 10:02 AM on June 1, 2015 [5 favorites]
I feel like if it emerged someone liked Predators better than Predator we might have trouble maintaining our non-judgmental stance.
posted by Artw at 10:33 AM on June 1, 2015
posted by Artw at 10:33 AM on June 1, 2015
Booo, this sounded really fun but was kind of boring. (I would still pay money to see it on the big screen, though, obviously.)
posted by Mooseli at 10:36 AM on June 1, 2015
posted by Mooseli at 10:36 AM on June 1, 2015
If it's not for you it's not for you, the other movies won't help.
You should definitely watch the first 10 minutes of Predator 2 though. It's like every late 80's fear about drugs, crime, urban decay, gangs, and out-gunned police distilled down into one action sequence. It's Danny "I'm too old for this shit" Glover taking on a bunch of gang members armed with assault rifles which are probably made of drugs using nothing but a revolver and some ill-fitting pants.
I'm surprised police departments around the country don't just show that scene every time some one asks why they need a MRAP. Like literally just show that scene, and then climb in their tank and drive away.
posted by Panjandrum at 10:54 AM on June 1, 2015 [4 favorites]
You should definitely watch the first 10 minutes of Predator 2 though. It's like every late 80's fear about drugs, crime, urban decay, gangs, and out-gunned police distilled down into one action sequence. It's Danny "I'm too old for this shit" Glover taking on a bunch of gang members armed with assault rifles which are probably made of drugs using nothing but a revolver and some ill-fitting pants.
I'm surprised police departments around the country don't just show that scene every time some one asks why they need a MRAP. Like literally just show that scene, and then climb in their tank and drive away.
posted by Panjandrum at 10:54 AM on June 1, 2015 [4 favorites]
also the bit where the gangster sticks his entire face into a 50 gallon drum of cocaine and then shrieks like a banshee who just ate the world's best powdered donut.
posted by poffin boffin at 10:58 AM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 10:58 AM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
The original Predator was worth it for the world's most epic handshake.
Also, for giving Governer Ventura his autobiography title.
posted by Existential Dread at 11:03 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
Also, for giving Governer Ventura his autobiography title.
posted by Existential Dread at 11:03 AM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
Predators is a beautiful work of art.
About nostrils
posted by shakespeherian at 11:04 AM on June 1, 2015
About nostrils
posted by shakespeherian at 11:04 AM on June 1, 2015
we need to make everyone watch it again
posted by poffin boffin at 11:07 AM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by poffin boffin at 11:07 AM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
From first to worst:
1. Predator
2. Predator 2
3. Batman vs Predator comic
4. Archie vs Predator comic
5. Aliens vs Predator comic
6. Judge Dredd vs Predator comic
7. every other Predator comic
8. Predators
........
∞-2. Aliens vs Predator
∞-1. That Batman vs Predator fan film that people seem to like because of the costume work, because otherwise it's hot garbage.
∞. Aliens vs Predator 2
posted by thecjm at 1:17 PM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
1. Predator
2. Predator 2
3. Batman vs Predator comic
4. Archie vs Predator comic
5. Aliens vs Predator comic
6. Judge Dredd vs Predator comic
7. every other Predator comic
8. Predators
........
∞-2. Aliens vs Predator
∞-1. That Batman vs Predator fan film that people seem to like because of the costume work, because otherwise it's hot garbage.
∞. Aliens vs Predator 2
posted by thecjm at 1:17 PM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
where is the alien <3 predator comic though.
posted by poffin boffin at 1:19 PM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 1:19 PM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
For a minute, my post had a typo and listed "Archer vs Rredator" instead of "Archie vs Predator." Archer vs Predator would of course immediately be the number one entry on that list, and every subsequent list of anything.
posted by thecjm at 1:22 PM on June 1, 2015
posted by thecjm at 1:22 PM on June 1, 2015
Predator vs. The Hidden
posted by benzenedream at 1:25 PM on June 1, 2015
posted by benzenedream at 1:25 PM on June 1, 2015
Predator Vs To Catch A Predator.
posted by Artw at 1:30 PM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by Artw at 1:30 PM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
To import (and slightly alter) some jokes I made over on chat:
Predator vs Freddy vs Jason
Predator vs. Kramer vs. Kramer
Predator vs. Joe vs. the Volcano
posted by Existential Dread at 1:48 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
Predator vs Freddy vs Jason
Predator vs. Kramer vs. Kramer
Predator vs. Joe vs. the Volcano
posted by Existential Dread at 1:48 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
Predator vs. 500 Duck-sized Horses
posted by cortex at 1:55 PM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by cortex at 1:55 PM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
Predator vs. Ecks vs. Sever
posted by Panjandrum at 1:56 PM on June 1, 2015
posted by Panjandrum at 1:56 PM on June 1, 2015
Predator vs Ali: Rumble in the Jungle II
posted by Chrischris at 1:57 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Chrischris at 1:57 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
Predator vs. Redditor: Rumble in Mom's Basement
posted by Existential Dread at 2:04 PM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by Existential Dread at 2:04 PM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
Predator v. Board of Education
posted by mhum at 5:00 PM on June 1, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by mhum at 5:00 PM on June 1, 2015 [5 favorites]
Predator v. Loving
posted by benzenedream at 6:15 PM on June 1, 2015
posted by benzenedream at 6:15 PM on June 1, 2015
Predator feat. Q-Tip
posted by shakespeherian at 6:26 PM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by shakespeherian at 6:26 PM on June 1, 2015 [3 favorites]
Abbott and Costello Meet Predator
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 7:20 PM on June 1, 2015
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 7:20 PM on June 1, 2015
The Grand Predation Hotel
posted by Artw at 7:34 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Artw at 7:34 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
Predator vs Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
posted by shakespeherian at 8:04 PM on June 1, 2015
posted by shakespeherian at 8:04 PM on June 1, 2015
My Dinner with Predator
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 8:08 PM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 8:08 PM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
Predator vs Predator starring Dustin Predator and Predatyl Streep
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:17 PM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:17 PM on June 1, 2015 [2 favorites]
Gary Busey is the most sane and rational part of Predator 2
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 8:32 PM on June 1, 2015
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 8:32 PM on June 1, 2015
Also Predator 2 would be a fantastic open world sandbox action RPG
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 8:34 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 8:34 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
Wouldn't it just be more Saint's Row?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:04 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:04 PM on June 1, 2015 [1 favorite]
Hmm, yeah. More like Saint's Row crossed with Vampire: The Masquerade: Bloodlines.
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 9:38 PM on June 1, 2015
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 9:38 PM on June 1, 2015
Ray Walston, Luck Dragon: "Hmm, yeah. More like Saint's Row crossed with Vampire: The Masquerade: Bloodlines."
So, where de Kickstarter?
posted by Samizdata at 8:32 AM on June 2, 2015 [2 favorites]
So, where de Kickstarter?
posted by Samizdata at 8:32 AM on June 2, 2015 [2 favorites]
Also it occurs to me that the Robocop universe must be the same as the Saint's Row one. Robocop is practically in STAG.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:59 AM on June 2, 2015
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:59 AM on June 2, 2015
Predator v. Citizens United: Whoever Wins, We Lose.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 12:47 PM on June 2, 2015
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 12:47 PM on June 2, 2015
Wow, ROU_Xenophone. Having already decided that the Robocop and the Ace Attorney universes are the same, Saint's Row does fit in pretty well there. Everywhere is ridiculous near-future murdertown.
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 2:11 PM on June 2, 2015
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 2:11 PM on June 2, 2015
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posted by fearfulsymmetry at 6:19 AM on June 1, 2015