Pop! Pop! Poppoppop! Pop!
July 2, 2015 3:41 PM   Subscribe

It's the end of bubblewrap as we know it.

iBubble Wrap isn't inflated until it reaches its destination, so it saves a lot of space in transit. When buyers (largely retailers that ship products) receive the rolls, they will use a special pump to inflate the bubbles, but even then they won't be poppable.

The Verge has virtual bubblewrap for you in your time of need.

Quartz claims you'll still be able to get your fix.

Previously.
posted by gingerbeer (40 comments total) 10 users marked this as a favorite
 
nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 3:45 PM on July 2, 2015 [7 favorites]


Tension sheet is still a faint possibility.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 3:49 PM on July 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


I was in a shop the other day, waiting to sign in to the store so I could start work. I was waiting at the customer service desk, and the customer in front of me was going off to the poor CSR behind the counter about something to do with the points system in store, which is run by a different company. The customer was quite irate that they'd had to ring this other company and was letting the CSR know all about it in no uncertain terms. After about 5 minutes of ranting, the customer left.

While the CSR was looking for the signing in book, I took the unit I was to place in store from its cocoon of bubble wrap. The CSR's eyes lit up when I handed it to her with a knowing grin, and I felt really good about myself for the rest of the day.
posted by Solomon at 3:50 PM on July 2, 2015 [20 favorites]


We finally really did it...

You Maniacs! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!
posted by entropicamericana at 3:54 PM on July 2, 2015 [12 favorites]


Oh, yes, of course, iBubble Wrap for all your information wrapping needs.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 3:55 PM on July 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


iBubble? Will it be available in translucent blueberry and have a built-in handle?
posted by item at 3:55 PM on July 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


Well, there's always the ASMR videos on youtube.
posted by MillMan at 3:57 PM on July 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


While trying to organize and repack the contents of my storage unit, I removed enough bubble wrap to fill a 20-gallon plastic bin... so in a few years, THAT is going to be the most valuable stuff in my storage unit? (Then again, thinking about what I have in my storage unit, maybe it already is)
posted by oneswellfoop at 4:02 PM on July 2, 2015 [6 favorites]


1. Buy large quantities of poppable bubble wrap now; store it safely; wait
2. Cut into small 2x2" pieces; sell to desperate individuals on street corners near corporate offices and in office supply store parking lots
3. PROFIT!!!
posted by Hairy Lobster at 4:03 PM on July 2, 2015 [9 favorites]


I don't feel fine...
posted by bookwo3107 at 4:04 PM on July 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Well I mean OBVIOUSLY right when the machines to make it go idle and are available secondhand for cheap is the best time to launch Tension Sheet.
posted by ckape at 4:10 PM on July 2, 2015


And if that wasn't bad enough, now it's the law that this new bubble wrap has to be included in every batch of guacamole!
posted by yoink at 4:12 PM on July 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Just the other day my four year old nephew handed me a sheet of bubble wrap and asked, "Will you pop this for me?" So young for such a vicarious pleasure! Alas he'll never now experience it for himself.
posted by Thing at 4:14 PM on July 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


stop this world i want to get off
posted by Atom Eyes at 4:14 PM on July 2, 2015


First peas in guacamole, now this...
posted by angeline at 4:15 PM on July 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thanks, Obama
posted by davros42 at 4:19 PM on July 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


no💢ooooooo💢ooooooooooooo💢o💢ooooooooo💢oooo💢ooooooooooooooo💢💢ooooo

so satisfying
posted by oulipian at 4:20 PM on July 2, 2015 [41 favorites]


Also, the video at the end claims that bubble wrap was originally marketed as wallpaper. Imagine a whole house filled with bubble wrap walls!
posted by KGMoney at 4:23 PM on July 2, 2015


Imagine a whole house filled with bubble wrap walls!

That's like decorating with an unstable isotope of wallpaper, or something. I wonder what the half-life of bubble wrap is?
posted by FishBike at 4:30 PM on July 2, 2015 [9 favorites]


Rest easy.
posted by kmz at 4:31 PM on July 2, 2015


item: "iBubble? Will it be available in translucent blueberry and have a built-in handle?"

No, but I'm pretty sure that it will wirelessly connect to the internet.
posted by double block and bleed at 4:32 PM on July 2, 2015


There will be an app, if there isn't one already, where you can pop virtual bubble wrap for 5 cents a pop. The app developer will buy a small island.
posted by double block and bleed at 4:34 PM on July 2, 2015


I wonder what the half-life of bubble wrap is?

Around me? About twelve seconds.
posted by brecc at 4:38 PM on July 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


So I'm confused. On-site filling has been around for years. The company in the article, Sealed Air, introduced something called "NewAir I.B.® Express" in 2009 (see e.g. this typically cheesy industry video from early 2010, or this 2012 "Will it break" episode), and they're not the only manufacturer. And everyone's using that these days. Does Slate grow their writers in some kind of sterile lab, isolated from any contact with the actual world, or how do these kinds of articles happen?
posted by effbot at 4:41 PM on July 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


It was in the WSJ as well. Journalists get a lot of their stuff from PR and press releases, so maybe that's happening.
posted by vogon_poet at 6:04 PM on July 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


The first online game I ever played, some time in the late 1990s, was an implementation of Virtual Bubble Wrap: this one I think, though it doesn't seem to work for me any more.

Perhaps it will work for you.
posted by motty at 6:48 PM on July 2, 2015


I honestly asked myself before reading this post "How can this day get any worse?"

Now I know.
posted by 4ster at 6:57 PM on July 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


They were so busy thinking they could do something that they didn't stop to think if they should.
posted by Strange Interlude at 7:36 PM on July 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


I predict a bubble wrap gap in the flourishing black market.
posted by clavdivs at 8:12 PM on July 2, 2015


no💢ooo💢💢oo💢oooooo💢oooooo💢o💢ooo💢ooooo💢oooo💢oooo💢o💢ooo💢oooo💢💢ooooo

so this is what I'm forced to reduce to now...

* keeps popping *
posted by numaner at 11:24 PM on July 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Just unh need unh to unh jump unh harder...
posted by Samizdata at 12:27 AM on July 3, 2015


numaner: "no💢ooo💢💢oo💢oooooo💢oooooo💢o💢ooo💢ooooo💢oooo💢oooo💢o💢ooo💢oooo💢💢ooooo

so this is what I'm forced to reduce to now...

* keeps popping *
"

Realizes once again he needs to learn Unicode
posted by Samizdata at 12:29 AM on July 3, 2015


There are a lot of "infinite bubble wrap" toys on the market, including iphone cases and keychains. I am not sure if any of them are actually any good, but they seem to be popular as stim toys.
posted by NoraReed at 1:40 AM on July 3, 2015


/runs to Officeworks to buy half a dozen of their giant rolls of bubblewrap
posted by harriet vane at 1:58 AM on July 3, 2015


I have a very large roll of bubble wrap in my shop. The roll is perforated, so the sheets tear off into 4' x 4' pieces. I suppose the roll is 5 feet in diameter.

Finally, I am rich.
posted by yesster at 7:17 AM on July 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


We got a package yesterday with the new bubble wrap inside. That was the first time I'd even heard of it - handed the roll to my 6 year old to pop. He jumped on it to no avail. We examined it, checked the way the air flowed between bubbles, and determined that to pop it, we'd need to apply pressure along the length of each individual air cell. He put on a pair of my wife's shoes to lengthen his feet, and jumped / stamped in combo. POP. He was delighted that he could figure it out.

It isn't the end of bubble wrap. It's the boss level. Go get 'em, kid!!
posted by caution live frogs at 2:46 PM on July 3, 2015 [5 favorites]


The boss level is the bigger air cushions. Much louder pops. Not entirely sure they work as stress relief, though.
posted by effbot at 6:01 PM on July 3, 2015


those are just STARTLING. they are the bubble wrap versions of those cinnamon roll or biscuit tins that you have to whack on the counter to open
posted by NoraReed at 8:25 PM on July 3, 2015


bubble pillows : bubble wrap : : startling biscuit tin pop that makes the icing fly across the room : satisfying jar lid popping sound
posted by NoraReed at 8:26 PM on July 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Those bubble pillows are great for waking the dog up though.
posted by numaner at 10:30 AM on July 4, 2015


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