One weird trick to stop the baby inquiries!
August 21, 2015 10:35 AM   Subscribe

A photographer in London did a new-baby photo shoot with an adorable puppy named Humphry standing in for a human infant in order to send a message. (SLBuzzfeed)
posted by Fig (41 comments total) 11 users marked this as a favorite
 
If only I could convince my cats to participate in this.
posted by joan_holloway at 10:37 AM on August 21, 2015 [8 favorites]


Humphrey is adorable, but ... I dunno. I have loved my dogs, but they are not children, nor are they a replacement for children. Perhaps I am out of step.
posted by suelac at 10:40 AM on August 21, 2015 [8 favorites]


Ok, I laughed out loud at the "baby's feet between mom and dad's feet" shot. The swaddling shot was pretty choice, too.
posted by holborne at 10:44 AM on August 21, 2015 [24 favorites]


This is pretty darned perfect (though I'd love it even more if Humphrey had been a rescue). The foot shot in particular was excellent.

Baby dogs are pretty much the only babies I ever want to see.
posted by DingoMutt at 10:46 AM on August 21, 2015 [12 favorites]


Classic. Reminds me of the dude who took engagement photos with a burrito.
posted by delight at 10:47 AM on August 21, 2015 [18 favorites]


"But you might change your mind" they always say.

"Only if it shits itself" I think silently in my head while smiling politely.
posted by srboisvert at 10:51 AM on August 21, 2015 [6 favorites]


I didn't take the message as "dogs are a replacement for children," btw. I thought that if anything, they were making the point that these photo shoots have become totally hackneyed because all new parents now do basically the same shots and put them up on FB.
posted by holborne at 10:52 AM on August 21, 2015 [26 favorites]


I Loved this! So weary of getting the de rigueur professional infant photo shoots.
posted by Tullyogallaghan at 10:56 AM on August 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


Humphrey is adorable, but ... I dunno. I have loved my dogs, but they are not children, nor are they a replacement for children.

I wasn't taking this as "this is a replacement child". I was taking this as "this is as close as we're going to get to giving you grandchildren for now, Mom, so SHUT UP."
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:57 AM on August 21, 2015 [28 favorites]


I hope they do that smashcake thing on his first birthday. The concept of smashcakes fills me with rage. Seeing a dog enjoying one might help heal my bitter heart.
posted by DingoMutt at 10:58 AM on August 21, 2015 [6 favorites]


I wonder if the "one weird trick" story was made up after the fact. Friends of mind do this shit allll the time, 100% irony free.
posted by sideshow at 10:59 AM on August 21, 2015 [3 favorites]


Amazing. I have always thought that photoshoots for babies are the most ridiculous wastes of money ever, but this is fantastic.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 11:01 AM on August 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm sorely missing a shot of the dog sleeping with a cabbage leaf on its head or sitting in a flower.
posted by LionIndex at 11:08 AM on August 21, 2015 [17 favorites]


They missed the one where doggy is sleeping on someone's outstretched arm, his head cradled in their hand.
posted by Kabanos at 11:16 AM on August 21, 2015 [9 favorites]


Baby dogs are pretty much the only babies I ever want to see.

To paraphrase Nick Fury, a lot of guys think that. Until the baby African elephant chasing birds starts.
posted by George_Spiggott at 11:19 AM on August 21, 2015 [7 favorites]


Due to some weird work internet filters, this is how I see the article, which seems oddly appropriate for BuzzFeed: MEGA ICONS and not much else (zoom in for the full experience; sorry mobile device users).
posted by filthy light thief at 11:25 AM on August 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


This fills my dark, bitter little heart with so, so, so much joy. The paws between feet picture nearly killed me.

When I get a dog, I swear I'll have a gender reveal party (one of the grossest things I've come across on my FB feed in recent years). It's a ... fluffy puppy with big paws and floppy ears!
posted by kariebookish at 11:36 AM on August 21, 2015 [16 favorites]


So photographer finds ingenious way to nationally advertise his baby shooting chops for free.. Well played Sir.
posted by zeoslap at 11:46 AM on August 21, 2015 [2 favorites]


So photographer finds ingenious way to nationally advertise his baby shooting chops for free.. Well played Sir.

The photographer is a woman.
posted by holborne at 12:03 PM on August 21, 2015 [3 favorites]


If only I could convince my cats to participate in this.

I did, kinda.
posted by the phlegmatic king at 12:11 PM on August 21, 2015 [11 favorites]


If only I could convince my cats to participate in this.

I did, kinda.


The outcome: not unexpected. Ella looks to shoot lasers from her eyes.
posted by Ogre Lawless at 12:21 PM on August 21, 2015 [4 favorites]


> When I get a dog, I swear I'll have a gender reveal party (one of the grossest things I've come across on my FB feed in recent years). It's a ... fluffy puppy with big paws and floppy ears!

Ooh, you could adapt a bris or christening ceremony to celebrate the puppy getting snipped.

(Not suggesting either of those religious traditions are akin to getting neutered, just that they're infant rites-of-passage which partially serve to introduce the baby to the community.)
posted by desuetude at 12:23 PM on August 21, 2015 [3 favorites]


Not that I'm judging or anything (okay, I'm judging) but those professional family photoshoots are kinda weird.
posted by Nevin at 12:38 PM on August 21, 2015 [2 favorites]


To paraphrase Nick Fury, a lot of guys think that

To paraphrase Eowyn, I am no guy ;)

(Though I suppose I couldn't say no to a dog-sized elephant)
posted by DingoMutt at 12:46 PM on August 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yes, kariebookish. YES.
posted by bitter-girl.com at 12:55 PM on August 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


I looked up smashcakes, because I had never heard of the idea (I mean, i coulda guessed...).

So, this article is just an excuse to loosely explain smashcakes and have a bunch of baby pictures.
But I do like this one picture from that page, mainly because it looks like the one year old entered into a no holds battle to the death with that puppy (or maybe another human child) and just really focussed on winning.
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 12:55 PM on August 21, 2015 [2 favorites]


The dog's face in the last picture says it all.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 1:02 PM on August 21, 2015


Not that I'm judging or anything (okay, I'm judging) but those professional family photoshoots are kinda weird.

Which is totally cool and all. As someone with small children who has participated in a few now, they are an opportunity to get the photos of this tiny and really important person that reflect your mental image of them, rather than what blurry mess appears on your phone when you try to do it yourself. So they give us huge pleasure. So they aren't weird for us. I suspect you probably know that too, smile!

Anyway, nice dog photos, but where is the breastfeeding shot?
posted by alasdair at 1:15 PM on August 21, 2015 [7 favorites]


I didn't get pro photos taken for my first kid. But if for my second kid my wife wants to take a picture with the HUMAN BEING THAT SHE GREW IN HER BODY AND THEN PUSHED OUT OF BODY FOR 10 HOURS I'll be sure to let her know what a collosal waste of time and money that would be.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 1:26 PM on August 21, 2015 [11 favorites]


Frankly, I didn't really know that smashcakes were a thing (although I kind of noodled out more or less what it meant), so I clicked on the link and now I can honestly say without a moment's hesitation that the concept of smashcakes fills me with rage too.
posted by holborne at 1:28 PM on August 21, 2015 [3 favorites]


The dog's expression in that swaddling shot is perfect. It's not even my dog and I want to keep and cherish that picture forever.
posted by Catseye at 1:28 PM on August 21, 2015 [2 favorites]


I looked up smashcakes, because I had never heard of the idea (I mean, i coulda guessed...).

Wait why could you not just let that baby smash a piece of the regular cake? God knows every one-year-old in my family was photographed with frosting in their hair and cake all over their face without having to have the own very special cake to ruin.
A very famous 1-year-old will celebrate his birthday tomorrow, and while there's no word yet on whether little Prince George will ring in his second year by planting his face in a "smash cake," we can certainly hope.
Oh god why do you caaaaaaarrrre??????? Actual grown-up humans are writing about this on the internet because why?

I want off this planet.
posted by BrashTech at 3:41 PM on August 21, 2015 [5 favorites]


People are raging against smashcakes - I am so happy

As the DingoWife just proclaimed: 'Smashcakes are for fuckboys."
posted by DingoMutt at 3:51 PM on August 21, 2015


I am cracking up because my cousin and her husband totally did these dang poses with the first kid. Poses are stereotypical.
posted by jenfullmoon at 6:20 PM on August 21, 2015


This dog/child equivalency really gets on my nerves. My dog is no child. He is an adult dog, sort of. Really he's more of an idiot manchild of a dog, which makes the fact that my wife convinced me to name him Philip J Fry all the more appropriate.
posted by stet at 6:29 PM on August 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


Hahahaha the swaddle is so perfect. That dog looks infinitely happier than my daughter did when I organized photos for her.
posted by Pardon Our Dust at 6:55 PM on August 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


The intent behind these sorts of photoshoots is cute, but it's crazy to me how family photos have turned into these big silly things with props and costumes for the baby to wear. I get it; the baby is cute, the family looks happy, and it's a lovely photograph. Most of my friends have had these sorts of staged photos taken with their new baby, and they really are lovely photographs and I'm happy that they love them so much. But. It just looks so FAKE and STAGED that I can't imagine having one in my house and looking at it without thinking "Huh, we look a little unnatural and strange sitting on a haybale next to that wheelbarrow full of wooden apples. Why did we involve fake food in our family portrait?"
posted by gatorae at 7:26 PM on August 21, 2015 [5 favorites]


They missed the one where doggy is sleeping on someone's outstretched arm, his head cradled in their hand.
posted by Kabanos at 11:16 AM on August 21 [8 favorites +] [!]


and the one of the puppy's foot with their wedding rings dangling on his big toes . . . or, uh, dewclaws, I guess
posted by HotToddy at 8:51 PM on August 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


Well, we didn't get any professional newborn photos done of our daughter because we were exhausted and broke and didn't see the point, but looking back at the photos we did take I can see why people do. I love those early photos and there's a lot to be said for the raw honesty of them; still, I look like I've not just seen but been beaten up by a ghost, and my jaundiced baby looks like an Oompa-Loompa with a pointy head. Maybe it's worth dealing with some unimaginative stock poses to have all that cleverly hidden, even if people will roll their eyes at it a bit.
posted by Catseye at 2:12 AM on August 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


"But you might change your mind" they always say.

Well, that's a thing that happens. But it's also a thing that happens to some people after they become parents, so there's that.
posted by Too-Ticky at 5:08 AM on August 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


Yeah, my friend is a photographer and the newborn photos she took of our family are the only ones from that immediate time where I didn't look like a terrified shell of a lady human contemplating running away forever. So I totally get them, but this puppy version is far more joyful!
posted by Pardon Our Dust at 5:32 AM on August 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


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