"No one wants a fart-themed surprise sneaking up on her."
November 16, 2015 11:48 PM Subscribe
"Not everyone is so shy about queefing. Some people are downright enthusiastic about it. How else can we explain things like queef fetish forums, queef championships and queef-themed pornography? In her 2013 song, 'Queef,' Awkwafina incorporates the proud line, 'You need to embrace your queefing. You can’t be scared of it anymore. It’s gonna save the world.'" Queefing: How to Get Down with Sexual Embarrassment (By Carrie Weisman / AlterNet) [previously and relatedly]
This is where the language barrier comes in, because I have heard them called "fanny farts" in the UK, which doesn't work in the US. Queef just sounds dumb, though. Pussy parps, maybe?
Maybe he has a MetaFilter account.
I sure do!
posted by marienbad at 1:29 AM on November 17, 2015
Maybe he has a MetaFilter account.
I sure do!
posted by marienbad at 1:29 AM on November 17, 2015
Huh. I always called them "varts".
posted by transient at 1:58 AM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by transient at 1:58 AM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
Of course people should be embarrassed about this thing which is, all things considered, the least weird thing that human genitalia does.
posted by AdamCSnider at 4:38 AM on November 17, 2015 [7 favorites]
posted by AdamCSnider at 4:38 AM on November 17, 2015 [7 favorites]
queef championships
Goddamnit, do people really need to turn everything into a competition?
posted by Halloween Jack at 4:49 AM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
Goddamnit, do people really need to turn everything into a competition?
posted by Halloween Jack at 4:49 AM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
Mod note: One comment deleted. Not really sure what the point of wondering if a creepy fetishist has a Mefi account is, but maybe better to just be clearer about your reaction to the article.
posted by taz (staff) at 4:50 AM on November 17, 2015
posted by taz (staff) at 4:50 AM on November 17, 2015
I'm just wondering how you would score a championship: Loudness and length? Creativity? Ability to enunciate words or carry a tune?
posted by Dip Flash at 5:09 AM on November 17, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by Dip Flash at 5:09 AM on November 17, 2015 [4 favorites]
Queef sounds like a nautical term. Fanny fart is much more descriptive but would be confusing to our USA friends. I agree though, surely this isn't something we need to compare notes on (b sharp?)
posted by h00py at 5:39 AM on November 17, 2015
posted by h00py at 5:39 AM on November 17, 2015
[One comment deleted. Not really sure what the point of wondering if a creepy fetishist has a Mefi account is, but maybe better to just be clearer about your reaction to the article.]
Sorry, it was a joke; meant to keep it light after offering criticism of the article's writing. Didn't realize it could be taken as insinuating bad reflection of the original poster or anyone else. Hope I didn't make someone feel badly.
posted by williwaw at 6:41 AM on November 17, 2015
Sorry, it was a joke; meant to keep it light after offering criticism of the article's writing. Didn't realize it could be taken as insinuating bad reflection of the original poster or anyone else. Hope I didn't make someone feel badly.
posted by williwaw at 6:41 AM on November 17, 2015
One comment deleted. Not really sure what the point of wondering if a creepy fetishist has a Mefi account is
Well, of course I have a Mefi account. What an odd question!
posted by dr_dank at 6:49 AM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
Well, of course I have a Mefi account. What an odd question!
posted by dr_dank at 6:49 AM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
[One comment deleted. Not really sure what the point of wondering if a creepy fetishist has a Mefi account is, but maybe better to just be clearer about your reaction to the article.]
Now my totes hilarious reply just looks stupid! Thanks taz! ;)
posted by marienbad at 6:59 AM on November 17, 2015 [1 favorite]
Now my totes hilarious reply just looks stupid! Thanks taz! ;)
posted by marienbad at 6:59 AM on November 17, 2015 [1 favorite]
Queefer Madness
posted by chavenet at 7:14 AM on November 17, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by chavenet at 7:14 AM on November 17, 2015 [5 favorites]
I always get it confused with quorn.
posted by flabdablet at 7:44 AM on November 17, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by flabdablet at 7:44 AM on November 17, 2015 [4 favorites]
That must be tricky when your shopping, flabdablet. Or looking to join the hunt.
posted by marienbad at 7:55 AM on November 17, 2015
posted by marienbad at 7:55 AM on November 17, 2015
the ad for a polyamorous dating website that popped up in the middle of this article is quite endearing, I think
posted by runt at 9:22 AM on November 17, 2015
posted by runt at 9:22 AM on November 17, 2015
I remember watching Sunday Night Sex With Sue eons ago, a young lady called in complaining about queefing because her boyfriend hated it. Sue basically said "it means you're having vigorous sex. Are you enjoying it? Great, now go find a boyfriend who isn't a jerk."
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:55 AM on November 17, 2015 [12 favorites]
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:55 AM on November 17, 2015 [12 favorites]
FTA: Dr. Susan Block reminds us, “Queefing is very often a sign that the sex you’re having is really hot. It usually happens when you’re pumping away,”
I've always taken queefing as a compliment. Also, there is very little better in life than a hearty belly laugh with the person you just made super sexy times with, and nothing gets you there quicker than a queef.
posted by carsonb at 11:23 AM on November 17, 2015 [4 favorites]
I've always taken queefing as a compliment. Also, there is very little better in life than a hearty belly laugh with the person you just made super sexy times with, and nothing gets you there quicker than a queef.
posted by carsonb at 11:23 AM on November 17, 2015 [4 favorites]
I think I read a short story once about a guy whose pee-hole emitted an audible little gasp at the point of orgasm, rather than semen.
posted by colie at 11:37 AM on November 17, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by colie at 11:37 AM on November 17, 2015 [1 favorite]
I'm not looking til I complete some more conditioning.
posted by Artful Codger at 11:44 AM on November 17, 2015
posted by Artful Codger at 11:44 AM on November 17, 2015
I used to be embarrassed about this when I first began having sex and then my boyfriend was like "It's my fault all that air's in there!" so after that IDGAF.
posted by LizBoBiz at 1:31 PM on November 17, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by LizBoBiz at 1:31 PM on November 17, 2015 [3 favorites]
This is the first time I've done something embarrassing in sex and then later read on the internet 'no you're doing it rite'.
posted by colie at 1:57 PM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by colie at 1:57 PM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
I thought it was interesting that feckless fecal fear mongering and I both quoted a Sue/san with basically the same ideas about queefing, but it turns out that the host of Sunday Night Sex Show and Dr. Susan Block are two different people. I'll look into Sue Johanson's work, but I'll be damned if Dr. Block isn't hitting my quote key on the regular in the linked article:
“Queefing is what happens when a pussy isn’t just a container for male sexuality, for male energy. There’s this idea of that 'quiet vagina,' the vagina that doesn’t squirt, that doesn’t make noise, that’s just there for your cock. Well, no. This vagina expresses itself.”
posted by carsonb at 6:20 PM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
“Queefing is what happens when a pussy isn’t just a container for male sexuality, for male energy. There’s this idea of that 'quiet vagina,' the vagina that doesn’t squirt, that doesn’t make noise, that’s just there for your cock. Well, no. This vagina expresses itself.”
posted by carsonb at 6:20 PM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]
Also, there is very little better in life than a hearty belly laugh with the person you just made super sexy times with, and nothing gets you there quicker than a queef.
It's really important to back up and acknowledge that sex is really funny.
I mean, look at us all naked and sweaty and flopping around making noises and faces and saying things that out of this particular context sound absolutely ridiculous, super focused on rubbing these weird looking body parts together. It's HILARIOUS and sometimes you both* have to acknowledge that, usually when something breaks the trance we go into that even allows us to take this seriously in the first place.
* Or, depending on the occasion or one's general proclivities, y'all. Which if you think about it compounds the potential for hilarity.
posted by louche mustachio at 4:47 AM on November 18, 2015 [2 favorites]
It's really important to back up and acknowledge that sex is really funny.
I mean, look at us all naked and sweaty and flopping around making noises and faces and saying things that out of this particular context sound absolutely ridiculous, super focused on rubbing these weird looking body parts together. It's HILARIOUS and sometimes you both* have to acknowledge that, usually when something breaks the trance we go into that even allows us to take this seriously in the first place.
* Or, depending on the occasion or one's general proclivities, y'all. Which if you think about it compounds the potential for hilarity.
posted by louche mustachio at 4:47 AM on November 18, 2015 [2 favorites]
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not that that has ever happened before and definitely not to anyone I know
posted by louche mustachio at 12:32 AM on November 17, 2015 [2 favorites]