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December 16, 2015 7:03 AM   Subscribe

"Their first tries are stillborn. The kid has drawn the curtains and mounted straw men in the windowframes, at night animating their persons with guyropes so that shades dance in the illumined curtain. Some days later he lights firebits in a scullery bowl to ape the scream of gunfire. Each time the gangsome slanks off until at last they bivouac and learn his orphanage but do not learn his taste for violence. He hears their plans. Come back tonight round nine. Kids’s afraid of the dark. They are apocalyptically stupid." -Cormac McCarthy's Home Alone
posted by XQUZYPHYR (13 comments total)

This post was deleted for the following reason: Poster's Request -- Brandon Blatcher



 
this is great. Also, they are as apocolyptically stupid as I am apparently, because there are at least three words on every page of Blood Meridian that I have never heard of, nor has any of the dictionaries in my Kindle.

I'm not sure he's not making half that shit up, but that there writing is purty.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 7:18 AM on December 16, 2015 [3 favorites]


This makes me like both Home Alone and Cormac McCarthy so much more.
posted by palmcorder_yajna at 7:18 AM on December 16, 2015 [8 favorites]


Perfect. Please do a James Ellroy one.

"Their first tries come stillborn. Straw men stalk the window, straw men strike shades when it's dark."

And so on.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 7:23 AM on December 16, 2015


comment animated by no known referent in the living world
posted by thelonius at 7:29 AM on December 16, 2015 [2 favorites]


Holy moly, this is great!

"Far worse yet and branded in stark relief upon his palm is the letter M from which he discerns his doom, the mark of Mephistopheles MetaFilter and stigmata of the Antichrist."
posted by wenestvedt at 7:31 AM on December 16, 2015 [2 favorites]


"rubs himself in oils strange"
posted by judson at 7:33 AM on December 16, 2015 [3 favorites]


"his trousers are a bog teemed with alien fish and toad" sounds familiar...
posted by maggieb at 8:13 AM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


He uses pellets because he is a troll.
posted by ostranenie at 8:27 AM on December 16, 2015 [3 favorites]


I love the compoundwords.
posted by Rock Steady at 9:45 AM on December 16, 2015


The one thing this misses is the opportunity to ape McCarthy's minimalist punctuation (though I did notice 'its' used as a contraction without the '. This could either be a nod to McCarthy or an overlooked error.)

Otherwise, this is amazing.
posted by lucasks at 11:20 AM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


Note to self: "wardfled lobotomite" is a hell of a sock puppet name.
posted by The Bellman at 11:38 AM on December 16, 2015 [5 favorites]


That was amazing.
posted by flippant at 8:26 PM on December 16, 2015


I find McCarthy to be quite a difficult read sometimes, but this is amazing. It takes his style and, in the short form, avoids the slog
posted by trif at 4:46 AM on December 17, 2015


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