“The first website we made was www.MakeMyNudesFight.com.”
January 22, 2016 11:01 AM   Subscribe

Finally, courtesy of The Clickhole: An Oral History of Facebook. It features exclusive interviews with Mark Zuckerberg, Eduardo Saverin, Sean Parker, identical river giants Cameron And Tyler Winklevoss, and many others.
posted by Going To Maine (15 comments total) 17 users marked this as a favorite
That started out so promisingly.

And it did not wendell.
posted by Samizdata at 11:10 AM on January 22, 2016 [2 favorites]

Mildly amusing until the Winklevosses showed up. Then it became amazing.

my brother yes my brother
posted by ZaphodB at 11:32 AM on January 22, 2016 [6 favorites]

The format is brilliant: the italicized text under the pictures is 100% straight, making sure that people who only skim those parts pass it on.
posted by dr_dank at 11:58 AM on January 22, 2016 [1 favorite]

Totally naming my next sock puppet "furious boat clones"
posted by Itaxpica at 12:13 PM on January 22, 2016

When Metallica murdered my son Napster, he screamed.
posted by infinitewindow at 12:27 PM on January 22, 2016 [4 favorites]

Good in-a-nutshell description of FB's mission:

"Imagine a world where there are toilets in the middle of the street, and when you need to drop a Fearsome Brown, you march out into the middle of the street where everyone can see you, and if you’re a man, you reveal your Sickly Pendulum, and if you’re a woman, you reveal your Wacky Mystery, and you just sit there on the street toilet and drop your shame into the outdoor bowl for all to see, and cars honk at you while you do your problem. This is the sort of open, connected world that Facebook is striving to create."
posted by Lyme Drop at 12:38 PM on January 22, 2016 [27 favorites]

cackling gleefully, they paddled the rowboat very slowly across the floor, down the hallway, and out of a 12th-floor window

posted by gottabefunky at 12:55 PM on January 22, 2016 [3 favorites]

You know, I had meant to get around to watching The Social Network at some point, but now I don't want to as it couldn't possibly be as good as this.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 1:08 PM on January 22, 2016 [10 favorites]

I will personally give 100 (one hundred) dollars cash American, to the first Facebook employee to address Mark Zuckerberg as "Serpent Supreme, King of Computers and Prince of Warthogs" to his face in a work meeting.
posted by mhum at 1:17 PM on January 22, 2016 [7 favorites]

This is an amazing work of silliness. The Clickhole folks are doing a good job on this kind of on cumulative absurdity - gradually ratcheting up the silly, masterfully balancing references to earlier silliness, while skillfully interjecting new forms of silliness throughout the article.

If there is one line I can recommend, it would be Peter Thiel's comment at the end, "I’m currently the CEO of a startup called Ocean Car. It’s like Uber, but exclusively for car rides that drive you straight into the ocean."

If there are two lines, it would be these:

Divya Narendra: The Twins and I still want to steal Facebook back, but Sean Parker is always watching. As long as Sean Parker is alive, Facebook will be safe from the Winklevoss Twins.

Sean Parker: Always in the past I do it for Mark Zuckerberg. But I also do it for myself. And most of all, I do it for my wonderful dead son Napster, who was murdered by Metallica, the band with three good songs.

posted by borborygmi at 1:20 PM on January 22, 2016 [8 favorites]

This article contains numerous factual errors, but its coverage of the Nobel Prize in Economics is accurate.
posted by Apocryphon at 4:29 PM on January 22, 2016 [5 favorites]

This article contains numerous factual errors

And several fictional errors too!
posted by aubilenon at 5:00 PM on January 22, 2016 [1 favorite]

Clickhole appears to be winning the Internet. Go team Clickhole!
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 5:09 PM on January 22, 2016

Today, the Internet was Worth The Trouble(tm).
posted by Ryvar at 7:37 PM on January 22, 2016

Wow! The Gift Gorilla himself!
posted by Standard Orange at 11:54 PM on January 22, 2016 [1 favorite]

« Older That's some professional breadstick passing   |   My Bookshelf, Myself - NYT Newer »

This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments