HOP | SING | EAT
January 22, 2016 10:38 PM   Subscribe

Your frog's name is Gugget. They are a Orange-Banded Tree Frog. Cherish this frog. Begin Frog.
posted by Solon and Thanks (29 comments total) 20 users marked this as a favorite
 
Your frog made $0 in its lifetime.

Your frog's highest leap was 0 feet. Tremendous!

Thank you for FROG


All my frog wanted to do was sing, are you saying that a frog can only be measured in dollars earned and feet leapt?

oh but sincerely, no, thank you for frog, porpentine
posted by clockzero at 10:49 PM on January 22, 2016 [5 favorites]


I am already angry that this isn’t Frog Fractions 2.
posted by Going To Maine at 11:00 PM on January 22, 2016 [15 favorites]


Slow clap. My frog colonized other planets.
posted by So You're Saying These Are Pants? at 11:06 PM on January 22, 2016 [2 favorites]


Hop Sing was the name of the stereotypical Chinese cook for the Cartwright family played by Victor Sen Yung in "Bonanza", appearing in 106 episodes over the show's 14 seasons. Them Cartwright boys had healthy appetites, especially Hoss.
posted by oneswellfoop at 11:07 PM on January 22, 2016 [4 favorites]


This is vaporwave gaming.
posted by grumpybear69 at 11:12 PM on January 22, 2016 [2 favorites]


This is classic Porpentine is what it is.

I liked it a lot.
posted by Itaxpica at 11:18 PM on January 22, 2016 [3 favorites]


My frog was a vampire.
posted by nat at 11:25 PM on January 22, 2016 [4 favorites]


Your frog made $0 in its lifetime.
Your frog was a vampire. Your frog was a little bit evil.
Your frog swallowed a bomb and survived thanks to your brilliantly calibrated game settings!


truly the best frog.
posted by emmling at 11:51 PM on January 22, 2016 [1 favorite]


My frog made $3 working at BOOK NEWSPAPER. I'm surprised at how proud this makes me.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 12:08 AM on January 23, 2016 [1 favorite]


Your frog was a vampire. Your frog was the ultimate evil from which all lesser evils flowed. You feel so proud!

That's understating it, if anything!
posted by hap_hazard at 12:20 AM on January 23, 2016 [3 favorites]


I became a frog girl and went off to live with a witch in her airship!
posted by tavella at 12:49 AM on January 23, 2016 [2 favorites]


My frog jumped into a portal and I wound up playing a different game called Witch Egg.
posted by pattern juggler at 12:52 AM on January 23, 2016 [4 favorites]


No, thank you for frog.
posted by arha at 12:54 AM on January 23, 2016 [2 favorites]


I enjoy frog.
posted by louche mustachio at 2:25 AM on January 23, 2016 [1 favorite]


Your frog's name is Gugget.

I'm afraid this is incorrect. Him name is hopkin green frog.
posted by Ice Cream Socialist at 3:25 AM on January 23, 2016 [7 favorites]


My frog died of cholera.
posted by Splunge at 3:27 AM on January 23, 2016 [1 favorite]


Years later you hear of the publication of a great novel by a certain frog, one that weaves together the disparate fragments of the zeitgeist into an absolute javelin of wit and insight. You feel a humble pride in thinking you could in any way contribute to such a project.

Damn thing made no money, made one six-foot hop, and out-achieved me in life. I'm suddenly hungry for some frog-shaped candies...
posted by GhostintheMachine at 5:05 AM on January 23, 2016 [1 favorite]


ps: i'll find my frog
posted by ardgedee at 5:10 AM on January 23, 2016 [8 favorites]


Why do I keep playing this?!
posted by kyrademon at 6:31 AM on January 23, 2016 [1 favorite]


Frog death is currently false.
posted by jeather at 7:05 AM on January 23, 2016


My frog swallowed a bomb. I cut the wrong wire.
posted by phooky at 8:01 AM on January 23, 2016


Your frog was rather evil, and feared in some provinces.

I've always wanted to make a mark.
posted by metaquarry at 8:16 AM on January 23, 2016


My frog
Waits for me
Like a tadpole waits
Downwind on a tight rope leash

My frog
Is a fragile amphibian
Sometimes I'm a novocaine shot
Sometimes I'm an automat

My frog
Is often solo
Sometimes it ribbits then
Sometimes it's a golden glow

My frog
Is invested in
Suburban drainage ditch
Skyscraper shadows on a carcrash overpass

My frog
Is savage, tender
It wears no future faces
Owns just random pondweed

My frpg
Has a wanting wardrobe
I still explore
Of all the ponds I knew and those I want to know

My frog
Is a spark of electro flesh
Leased from the spawn of time
And geared for synchromesh

My frog
Is an image lost in algae films
A neon outline
On a high-rise lilypad

-- John Splosh
posted by Devonian at 9:11 AM on January 23, 2016 [5 favorites]


Devonian wins laurel wreath for Best Ultravox (John Foxx era) tribute lyrics EVAH.
posted by cstross at 9:49 AM on January 23, 2016


Hey, Frog Game made it here! I saw it first from Porpentine's Twitter feed (since changed). Some of the experiences reported above make me think she may have updated it since then.

While I didn't post Frog Game (there are lots of things that I don't end up posting), I did post  DOMAIN OF PRIME FROG, which while not Porpentine's was something she tweeted about.
posted by JHarris at 10:36 AM on January 23, 2016 [1 favorite]


Your frog has resigned in the face of a scandal at the age of 8.
posted by nickmark at 10:43 AM on January 23, 2016


Your frog was a fearsome food eater, widely respected! Your frog was a miraculous singer of worldwide fame! Your frog was extremely athletic, a stunning champ! Your frog made $8 in its lifetime. Your frog was a vampire. Your frog was a little bit evil.

Your frog's highest leap was 9 feet. Prodigous!


I'm not even going to tell you how many times I played to get such an accomplished frog
posted by babelfish at 11:21 AM on January 23, 2016 [4 favorites]


I'm not even going to tell you how many times I played to get such an accomplished frog

wow it's like the Lin Manuel of frogs. leave some talent for the rest of us, frog.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 12:18 PM on January 23, 2016 [3 favorites]


My frog also resigned in the face of scandal, and was a vampire. I fed it with my own blood, and its eyes turned into rubies.
posted by not that girl at 6:47 AM on January 24, 2016 [1 favorite]


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