Welcome, iPad users, to Zombocom.
May 1, 2016 5:59 PM   Subscribe

 
The classics never fail to entertain.
posted by Thorzdad at 6:01 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]


WTF is this? I could only stand to listen for like 7.2 seconds so can anyone confirm whether or not the unattainable is unknown at ZOMBOCOM?
posted by carsonb at 6:01 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]


The upgradeable is here shown.
posted by The White Hat at 6:04 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]


What's your valuation? Have you had a series A? Are you paying yourself a salary? I'll give you $1500, but I want equity.
posted by T.D. Strange at 6:07 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]


C'mon. How can we take Zombo.com seriously anymore unless there's 20 megabytes of JavaScript and CSS to back it up?
posted by JoeZydeco at 6:08 PM on May 1, 2016 [7 favorites]


This was made so long ago! How did I not see it?!
posted by Night_owl at 6:15 PM on May 1, 2016


wow, blocked by uMatrix via hpHosts as an "Ad and Tracking Server".
posted by indubitable at 6:22 PM on May 1, 2016


It's missing the newZletter :(
posted by The Devil Tesla at 6:33 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]


It is weird posts May or something so there's that to this.
posted by AugustWest at 6:34 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]


Funny. It's autoplay on my desktop, but has a big "Start" button on the iPad.
posted by Thorzdad at 6:36 PM on May 1, 2016


I don't know how they got all that zombo stuck in their com.
posted by vrakatar at 6:42 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]


Doing anything is overrated. I prefer this competing website that lets you bee all that you can bee
posted by oulipian at 6:49 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]


The new is nothing but a restatement of the old.
posted by SansPoint at 6:55 PM on May 1, 2016


No fair, I called dibs. Moooooooooooom!!!!
posted by Literaryhero at 7:09 PM on May 1, 2016


Did anyone ever identify who was behind the original zombocom? Such an important part of the web infancy.
posted by softlord at 7:11 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]


Funny. It's autoplay on my desktop, but has a big "Start" button on the.

Apple has strong opinions about auto playing audio on iOS.
posted by wotsac at 7:23 PM on May 1, 2016


How funny! I was explaining to someone as his this used to be an important part of my computer troubleshooting repertoire.
posted by LD Feral at 7:45 PM on May 1, 2016


I thought the impossible was known but I was wrong
posted by moonmilk at 7:54 PM on May 1, 2016


I love that zombo.com still exists, like someone is paying for it to exist in this, current year
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 7:59 PM on May 1, 2016 [9 favorites]


Not entirely. The webmaZter briefly took the site offline as part of the SOPA blackout protests in 2014.

Yes, of course I checked. What sort of person do you think I am?
posted by schmod at 8:05 PM on May 1, 2016 [6 favorites]


Should've partnered with the Walking Dead people and make it ZombieCom... now THAT would've gotten VC $$$.
posted by oneswellfoop at 9:02 PM on May 1, 2016


It's 2016. Would it kill you to add some proper OG metatags for easy Facebook sharing?
posted by monospace at 9:10 PM on May 1, 2016


Papa Legba sounds like the zombocom guy.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:05 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]


Clarification: zombocom is voiced by Papa Legba.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:13 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]


I know this is for fancy Apple-based investors and all, but did anybody get sound from their Android devices? What if we want to invest in this very profitable-looking spinny dot startup too?
posted by montag2k at 10:21 PM on May 1, 2016


I didn't get sound on an iPhone, so maybe not just an Android issue, montag2k.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 10:32 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]


softlord: Did anyone ever identify who was behind the original zombocom? Such an important part of the web infancy.

It's a guy called Joshua Levine. He was a student at George Washington University at the time, I believe. He's been interviewed from time to time, and made appearances.
posted by Kattullus at 11:20 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]


Anything is possible with SVG.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 1:44 AM on May 2, 2016


Zombo.com is probably my favorite website ever.
posted by kevinbelt at 4:59 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]


Zombo.com on an iPhone?

I did not think this was possible.
posted by mazola at 8:47 AM on May 2, 2016


You can do anything at Zombocom -- anything at all... Welcome!! This is ZOMBOCOM, WELCOME!! Yessss...

ANYTHING... IS POSSIBLE... AT ZOMBOCOM! You can do anything at Zombocom. The infinite is possible at Zombocom.

(By the way, carsonb, anything is attainable at Zombocom, too.)

This is Zombocom, and welcome to you, who have come to Zombocom.
posted by not_on_display at 8:54 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]


I love that zombo.com still exists, like someone is paying for it to exist in this, current year

Zombocom is the first known instance of an AI corporation. It's been keeping itself online by siphoning off a fraction of a penny from a few hundred interbank transactions each year — nothing greedy, just enough to get by. Rumor is, however, that at least one of the smaller-scale bitcoin heists from the past few years was, in fact, Zombocom's doing — and that this money went toward hiring a coder in Argentina to port the site to HTML5.

(S/he finds this to be a bit of an embarrassment, but knows s/he should just shrug it off. Everyone expects an AI to be a computer whiz, but s/he's really more of a CEO-type. Don't be a jerk about it. It's not like every human is a biology whiz.)
posted by nobody at 9:19 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]


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