(Hip) Hop Gun
May 9, 2016 8:07 PM   Subscribe

A fast-paced new Chinese recruiting video for the People’s Liberation Army “lures recruits with rap music.” The Marine Corps Times calls it “insane,” saying, “U.S. military recruiters take note: It's time to up your game.”

The Huffington Post calls a different new Chinese recruiting video, done for the PLA Navy, “alarming.”
posted by LeLiLo (48 comments total) 12 users marked this as a favorite
 
U.S. military recruiters take note: you have already tried to up your game with video games, and you see how that turned out? So maybe don't.
posted by gusandrews at 8:11 PM on May 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


Hell, after watching this, I think Cobra needs to up their game.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:14 PM on May 9, 2016 [4 favorites]


Shown: BADASSERY

Not shown: paperwork, shitty food, lack of privacy, manual labor, nullification of self before a rigid bureaucracy, sleep deprivation, long stretches of boredom punctuated by moments of existential terror, maiming, PTSD.
posted by escape from the potato planet at 8:21 PM on May 9, 2016 [48 favorites]


We begin with a still shot of a stoic man in uniform. Pull out. We reveal that he is especially stoic because he has been shot in the heart. Pull out. We reveal that it is a magazine advertisement for the People's Liberation Army. Pull out. The advertisement is in the hands of a stoic young man standing in the mountains. Pull out. He is standing at the grave of his best friend. Zoom in. He sets the magazine advertisement on top of the freshly disturbed soil, and promises to finish the mission his friend started. Pull way out. The graveside vow is a cutscene in a recruitment video game for the PLA. Cut to close up of the player's face. Cut back to close up of the pixels on the screen. Go back and forth between the player's face and the pixels, closer every time. Pull out. It is actually a bootleg illegal Chinese remake of Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and a young man is watching the scene where Bootleg Cameron is looking at the pointillist painting in the art museum. Pull out. The young man is watching the illegal DVD on the deck of an aircraft carrier. Pull out. The aircraft carrier is on the deck of a giant aircraft carrier that is carrying lots of regular-sized aircraft carriers. Pull out. The giant aircraft carrier is carrying all the weapons of war into an island-sized furnace to be melted down. Pull out. A giant armada of boats is heading toward the furnace. Pull out. The armada is the size of the Pacific Ocean, and it forms a peace symbol as big as the planet. Pull out. It's just a picture of the earth, and a guy's hand crumples it up and drops it. Voice-over: "If you're not joining the PLA, you're throwing it all away."
posted by compartment at 8:29 PM on May 9, 2016 [49 favorites]


U.S. military recruiters take note: you have already tried to up your game with video games, and you see how that turned out? So maybe don't.

That game, America's Army, cost about 0.25% of the military recruiting budget and was more effective than every other recruiting effort combined. So it worked out really well for awhile...
posted by blahblahblah at 8:31 PM on May 9, 2016 [6 favorites]


Never send me to Breitbart again.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 8:31 PM on May 9, 2016 [28 favorites]


U.S. military recruiters take note

Are the notes they're taking about anime opening credit sequences?
posted by belarius at 8:40 PM on May 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


I wish I spoke Chinese so I could know for certain there's nothing as good in here as "The code word is 'Rochambeau,' dig me? You have your orders now, go, man, go!" and the rest of "Yorktown," but I'm pretty sure there isn't.

I do suspect the US military recruiting manual recommends against all uses of the phrase "even if a bullet passes through my chest" though, so good on them for giving that approach a try.
posted by zachlipton at 8:42 PM on May 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


Cool trailer. When does the film come out?
posted by adept256 at 8:45 PM on May 9, 2016


Quartz notes that rap-style videos have also been employed to...warn Chinese citizens about the dangers of foreign spies, who were “depicted as American superheroes.” (And, strangely, Rowan Atkinson’s bumbling “Mr. Bean.”)

Oh god, I clicked that link and fell down this rabbithole into a bunch of completely batshit insane propaganda videos and I can't get out, plz hope me
posted by mstokes650 at 8:50 PM on May 9, 2016 [8 favorites]


Are the notes they're taking about anime opening credit sequences?

To be fair, GATE actually was part-government-funded JSDF propaganda. (Albeit set in an alternate universe where the JSDF is a universally respected military force to be reckoned with and catgirls exist.)

Insert joke about which of those stretches suspension of disbelief further here.
posted by fifthrider at 8:52 PM on May 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


That looked like a third-rate action flick.
posted by My Dad at 8:54 PM on May 9, 2016


A couple of thoughts...

I didn't realize it was Breitbart until I was reading the comments and thought: these are particularly racist and sexist comments, even for the internet - where am I?

I didn't realize the Chinese Army was volunteer.

I'm a bit surprised how much the Chinese Military resembles the US military... The dress swords that they use, the white naval uniforms, etc.

Finally; the Chinese may make awesome music video recruitment videos that look like movie trailers... But the US has full length high budget feature films produced 'independently' by hollywood - that are military recruitment propaganda.
posted by el io at 8:57 PM on May 9, 2016 [7 favorites]


I do feel compelled to ask why we're linking to Breitbart here, instead of say, the Quartz article Breitbart ripped off. Breitbart is a pretty vile place and I think we should avoid linking it in FPPs without good reason, as is the semi-formal policy for other problematic "news" sites.
posted by zachlipton at 8:59 PM on May 9, 2016 [15 favorites]


But the US has full length high budget feature films produced 'independently' by hollywood - that are military recruitment propaganda.

Zero Dark Thirty and American Sniper had me yelling at the screen. What a load of horseshit. That the Syrian sniper didn't have a single line was just dehumanising.
posted by adept256 at 9:07 PM on May 9, 2016 [5 favorites]


I honestly don't see a bit of difference between this Chinese video and, say, the recruitment videos for the US Marine Corps.
posted by straight at 9:12 PM on May 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


Yvan eht nioj
posted by fallingbadgers at 9:24 PM on May 9, 2016 [11 favorites]


US Naval Recruiting is about 40 years ahead of this.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 9:27 PM on May 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


The USA military recruitment. Up their game. Sigh. Where to begin?

Howabout "Down Periscope?" - it's "The Bad News Bears in a Submarine."

It's got a shit-ton of star-power in it, with two recognizable leads and the best and funniest character actors backing them up. A bunch of sad-sack, never going to amount to anything losers, and the everyone-thinks-he-can't genius officer. Also two marvelous and unsympathetic villains trying to undermine the notion that the Navy, in the form of the senior admiralty, is a benevolent and wise entity.

Who could possibly stop them?

I mean, really. This movie is charming as all hell. You could literally see yourself as one of those characters. Literally.

Once you signed on as a submariner, the boat you'd be on would be much cleaner, quieter and well lit, and you'd do your part to keep it that way, to show that bastard, Lt. Marty Pascal, that you're good enough to be in this person's Navy!

And the experts think America needs to keep up with China in the propaganda game????????
posted by Slap*Happy at 9:28 PM on May 9, 2016


Never send me to Breitbart again... I do feel compelled to ask why we're linking to Breitbart here...

Apologies. I had no idea what Breitbart was, or that it was supposed to be off limits. If whoever is in charge at the moment wants to switch the first link over to YouTube, that would be here.

I think we should avoid linking it in FPPs without good reason, as is the semi-formal policy for other problematic "news" sites.

Is there a list anywhere on the site of such places? For future reference?
posted by LeLiLo at 9:30 PM on May 9, 2016


[Replaced that first link, carry on.]
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 9:34 PM on May 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


Rap-Style? Oh come on, that music was basically Faith No More's "Epic".
posted by drinkyclown at 9:38 PM on May 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


I do feel compelled to ask why we're linking to Breitbart here, instead of say, the Quartz article Breitbart ripped off.

Actually Quartz rips off most of their stuff yet other websites, so...
posted by My Dad at 9:38 PM on May 9, 2016


Lance Cpl. Harold James Trombley: Sergeant, I didn't get to shoot!
Cpl. Josh Ray Person: That fucking sucks, Trombley. Did your recruiting officer tell you you'd get to shoot people?
Lance Cpl. Harold James Trombley: Fucking A he did!
Cpl. Josh Ray Person: See, Trombley asked about shooting people. I asked about pussy. The guy told me I'd get to go to Thailand and get all kinds of strange. What'd you ask about, Brad? Brad probably saw that T.V. commercial, the one with the knight that fucks up the dragon that turns into the Marine.
Cpl. Walt Hasser: Woo woo! Dress blues with a sword!
Cpl. Josh Ray Person: Fucking dress blues commercial man. That got so many fucking dudes. Now look at us: Trombley hasn't killed anybody, I'm half a world away from good Thai pussy, and Colbert is out here rolling around fuckbutt Iraq hunting for dragons in a MOPP suit that smells like four days of piss and ball sweat.

posted by Cool Papa Bell at 9:50 PM on May 9, 2016 [10 favorites]


Even more alarming is the Japanese naval recruitment video.
posted by unliteral at 9:59 PM on May 9, 2016 [4 favorites]


straight: "the recruitment videos for the US Marine Corps."

Huh. The new Marine Corps recruiting videos are really downplaying the amount of lava monster slaying involved. Or is that being handled by Army drones now?
posted by mhum at 10:27 PM on May 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


Are the notes they're taking about anime...

Hmm, I think I remember that F-8 from somewhere...
posted by cosmic.osmo at 10:44 PM on May 9, 2016


Death by a thousand cuts
posted by hal9k at 11:45 PM on May 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


When I was in Turkey I visited their brand-new Simulation Center at the Gallipoli Peninsula. The presentation ended with an unabashedly propagandesque nationalistic video for Turkey.

If you take away the words, military recruitment/nationalism propaganda videos look pretty much the same whether you're in the USA, China, or Turkey. Fighter jets, people doing athletic military tasks in unison, carriers, stuff blowing up, shots from inside the fighter jet, missile launch, impressive guns, sweeping music, children, lots of attractive uniformed people in formation, more fighter jets . . . My point is that no matter our country or creed, in the end we all just want the same thing: heavy armaments, fighter jets, and to look really good doing a push up.
posted by schroedinger at 12:01 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]


Coming soon to the Pacific Theater!
posted by drdanger at 12:07 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]


Regarding its aesthetics, this thing was terribly edited. Total garbage. No musicality, no intentionality, just shot cut shot cut shot cut. Lots of amateur single black frames which should never get past the QC phase. Bad colour grading choices & inconsistencies throughout.

Basically any phone/prosumer/professional camera equipment is capable of making potentially beautiful imagery these days but you put the post process in the hands of amateurs and this is what you get. Not looking for subtlety here, just basic film grammar.
posted by timshel at 1:03 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]


would be interesting to see a translation of the lyrics

Here you go. Can't speak for how it might be received by the regular PRC citizen, though.
posted by satoshi at 1:15 AM on May 10, 2016


drinkyclown, it reminded me of "Rock Me Amadeus".

I can't decide if that made it better or worse.
posted by 1066 at 1:26 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]


My point is that no matter our country or creed, in the end we all just want the same thing:

I was impressed that peope were actually being killed - which is the job, after all. ADF advertising is sort of like a volvo ad, except the volvo is a submarine.
posted by pompomtom at 1:35 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]


Is it me, or does this sound like Rock Me Amadeus by Falco?
posted by running order squabble fest at 2:33 AM on May 10, 2016


Ah. Apparently it isn't just me.
posted by running order squabble fest at 2:34 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]


I was impressed that peope were actually being killed

i suspect that was just 'movie magic'

not even prc is that hardcore
posted by Sebmojo at 2:43 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]


It's true, Submariners fucking love Down Periscope. It's the most accurate depiction of the number of fucks submariners give.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 5:26 AM on May 10, 2016 [2 favorites]


Forget Rap Style, I'd like to see a Gangnam Style recruitment vid from the South Korean military.
posted by a lungful of dragon at 7:50 AM on May 10, 2016


Is this where we post non-USA recruitment videos?

Russian VDV (airborne)
Ukranian Army
posted by Comrade_robot at 7:57 AM on May 10, 2016


WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW MORE
posted by Wild_Eep at 8:04 AM on May 10, 2016 [3 favorites]


Is this where we post non-USA recruitment videos?


The Russian one isn't bad, but I always like recruitment films to feature a stirring cadence.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:06 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]


Ugh, the lyrics is definitely not good. The very second line was 'enemy always on our mind'. I clicked away after the refrain 'kill kill kill'.
posted by of strange foe at 9:22 AM on May 10, 2016 [1 favorite]


drinkyclown, it reminded me of "Rock Me Amadeus

It starts to sound like something out of Hamilton at 1:11
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 11:17 AM on May 10, 2016


I like the part in the video where they invade the US and stomp all over Delta Seals.
posted by JJ86 at 1:19 PM on May 10, 2016


timshel, is that the same for Michael Bay movies? Looked like a Michael Bay movie to me with less lens flare and explosions.
posted by asok at 2:36 PM on May 10, 2016


480p, plus the sound at 1:39 when the rocket blasts off makes this total amateur hour for a 2016 recruitment video.

No thanks! I'd rather join a cooler military!
posted by oceanjesse at 8:06 PM on May 10, 2016


Lots of actual shooting people and talk of enemies, I wonder who it is they're trying to get people to think of when they do that?
posted by gloriouslyincandescent at 4:08 AM on May 11, 2016


« Older Climate Change and the Future of Cities   |   Solo la frunza de nuc Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments