The vultures are waiting to pick your bones

June 2, 2016 6:26 PM

Wow! Check out this supercut of every time Oprah said "The vultures are waiting to pick your bones" on her show! (SL Clickhole)
posted by yellowbinder (17 comments total)

So, um, these are all dubbed right? Or have I just spent too long in the TundaMinous thread?
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 6:31 PM on June 2, 2016 [2 favorites]

Supercut of every time Tim Taylor said "Clean Your Teeth On My Bones" On "Home Improvement"! (SecondL CLickhole)
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 6:31 PM on June 2, 2016 [5 favorites]

There's one clip in the middle that is Oprah actually saying this phrase in an interview about her career.
posted by infinitewindow at 6:35 PM on June 2, 2016 [4 favorites]

I can never decide what I love most about Clickhole: the absurdity of everything they produce, or the angry comments on their Facebook posts from people who cannot understand humor that isn't all like DING DING DING HERE COMES THE JOKE!
posted by palomar at 8:12 PM on June 2, 2016 [3 favorites]

I'm so afraid right now.
posted by soakimbo at 8:24 PM on June 2, 2016 [1 favorite]

0:28 is my favorite.
posted by sunset in snow country at 8:30 PM on June 2, 2016

Would have been funnier if they made it like an hour long.
posted by jnnla at 8:55 PM on June 2, 2016 [3 favorites]

There's this thing, though, where you push a funny thing so far that it becomes unfunny, but if you keep pushing it it comes back around to funny, and that's what Clickhole is to me.

But then, I've read over ten Chuck Tingle books in the past two days while cackling like a goddamn lunatic, so maybe I'm just really fucked up.
posted by palomar at 10:42 PM on June 2, 2016 [11 favorites]

Yeah, a prime example of the concept is the ten minute YouTube video that is just a constant loop of Cher saying "WAGON WHEEL WATUSI", taken from the movie Burlesque. It's funny, then it hurts real bad, deep hurting, deep hurting, deep hurting... then funny again.
posted by palomar at 10:57 PM on June 2, 2016 [2 favorites]

I love Clickhole because even when it doesn't make me laugh, it's like the perfect response to everything absurd about modern pop culture. The joke is that they're creating "anti-viral" media that people consume in exactly the same way as they consume everything else. But every little way I feel like I'm being force-fed something, if not outright manipulated, by everything else on the internet gets turned on its head, and I get to be the one laughing at the absurdity of it all instead of passively accepting it.

Or that's what I tell myself, anyway.

I like this one just because it delights me to imagine a world where Oprah is constantly telling people that vultures are going to pick their bones.
posted by teponaztli at 12:51 AM on June 3, 2016 [3 favorites]

Another prime example is "Kristen Schaal is a Horse." I thought it didn't work on me any more. I was wrong.
posted by Ducks or monkeys at 12:52 AM on June 3, 2016 [8 favorites]

For whatever reason, this kind of reminds me of that time a newspaper "accidentally" switched the captions for the Far Side and Dennis the Menace, which Gary Larson said had improved them both immensely, to his embarrassment.
posted by teponaztli at 12:57 AM on June 3, 2016 [12 favorites]

I love this. Actually for some reason I think the Home Improvement one is funnier. Maybe because the line came, somehow, from an actual episode, and it makes no sense in context either.

I guess it's sort of the same reason that THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST works. Maybe Bustin' too, in a different way.
posted by uncleozzy at 5:06 AM on June 3, 2016 [1 favorite]

Remember when we used to make computers say silly things on start ups? Or back before we had jobs and could use stuff like this for ringtones?
posted by rebent at 5:58 AM on June 3, 2016 [2 favorites]

Remember when we used to make computers say silly things on start ups?

Hello - Smithers....
posted by yellowbinder at 6:14 AM on June 3, 2016 [4 favorites]

But then, I've read over ten Chuck Tingle books in the past two days

Wow, had not heard of this guy. He's quite prolific

-Bigfoot Sommelier Butt Tasting (Feb 2, 2015)
-Pounded In The Butt By My Own Butt (Mar 19, 2015)
-Pounded In The Butt By My Book "Pounded In The Butt By My Own Butt" (Mar 29, 2015)
-Angry Man Pounded By The Fear Of His Latent Gayness Over A Dinosaur Transitioning Into A Unicorn (Jun 2, 2015)
-Breaking the Fourth Butt: Eight Hot-To-Trot Meta Tinglers (Feb 7, 2016)
-Pounded in the Butt by My Irrational Bigoted Fear of Humans Who Were Born As Unicorns Using a Human Restroom (May 3, 2016)
posted by Hoopo at 7:13 AM on June 3, 2016 [2 favorites]

I know so little about Oprah that on reading this I just thought it was weird that she says that enough to make a collection. But I didn't really question it.
posted by bongo_x at 11:50 AM on June 3, 2016