Finally, a quick & easy fashion instructional for beanplating ladies
June 8, 2016 2:18 PM   Subscribe

 
Many of these would work perfectly well on women under 30 also.

For women who are 30 years old exactly, I don't know what to tell you.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 2:25 PM on June 8, 2016 [30 favorites]


Many of these would work perfectly well on women
posted by chavenet at 2:33 PM on June 8, 2016 [8 favorites]


For women who are 30 years old exactly, I don't know what to tell you.

Although since appropriated by the tourism industry, 30 is the original "gap year". It referred to the traditional year spent lodged, naked, in the gap between the sofa and the wall, contemplating death.
posted by gilrain at 2:33 PM on June 8, 2016 [147 favorites]


Related: Iris Apfel in an ad for Citroen.
posted by chavenet at 2:36 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


I appreciate this. I do. But, more examples of people who are not super rich would be nice!
posted by Glinn at 2:38 PM on June 8, 2016 [23 favorites]


But 30 is like two decades out of style!
posted by infini at 2:38 PM on June 8, 2016 [1 favorite]


:D :D :D I was SO ready to be O.U.T.R.A.G.E.D. So glad I clicked. Lots of awesome fashion in those pics. Helen Mirren for the win. BTW, who is Kallie Provencher? Ack. Never mind. IDC
posted by pjsky at 2:38 PM on June 8, 2016 [7 favorites]


OMG you guys, I am wearing whatever the fuck I want at this very moment! I've never felt so on-trend.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 2:41 PM on June 8, 2016 [66 favorites]


The ladies at 23 are the best thing I've seen all week.
posted by turbid dahlia at 2:41 PM on June 8, 2016 [4 favorites]


more examples of people who are not super rich would be nice!

Yeah, I would really like a GET. THAT. LOOK! guide under each photo with the items they're wearing and the price. Then maybe a second guide, underneath that, listing cheap knockoff versions.
posted by witchen at 2:45 PM on June 8, 2016 [4 favorites]


On reflection, if you're exactly 30 you should probably just wear whatever the fuck you want.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 2:45 PM on June 8, 2016 [8 favorites]


Ditto pjsky! I was RAGING before I even clicked and from picture one I was thrilled. I turn 40 in a couple of weeks so don't even start me on "things you should wear after X age" bullshit, so I needed this and am just about to forward it on to some women who I know will love it too. Thanks for the post!
posted by billiebee at 2:45 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


23 and 21 are a little over the top for my style, but I'm glad they're wearing what makes them happy.

22 is exactly what I wish my style was and I would kill to be that polished.

I do think using people as famous and well-off as Oprah or Ellen is kind of cheating, but they do look just as fabulous as everyone else on this list.

Thanks for the post, wonton endangerment!
posted by Night_owl at 2:46 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


Years ago, I was walking with a friend, and we passed a display of When I Am an Old Woman, I Shall Wear Purple. And my friend said "I hate that book." And I asked why, and she said "it seems so diminishing and belittling for women." I asked "When you are an old woman, what will you wear?" She looked at me and said "Out. Young. Men." She went on to be the only person I know who uses a sledgehammer, chainsaw, and flamethrower in the daily course of her work.
posted by GenjiandProust at 2:46 PM on June 8, 2016 [102 favorites]


Man I wish I could carry off a turban. Maybe when I have the gray hair for it.

Given no constraints my personal style would alternate between "Dorothy Zbornak goes to the club" and "lady beach bum."
posted by emjaybee at 2:46 PM on June 8, 2016 [8 favorites]


When I grow up I want to be Helen Mirren.
posted by Mary Ellen Carter at 2:46 PM on June 8, 2016 [23 favorites]


I'm 33. I'm more comfortable and happy with my body than I've ever ever been. I can't think I'm the only one.
posted by Emma May Smith at 2:49 PM on June 8, 2016 [10 favorites]


When everyone grows up, they want to be Helen Mirren. Some just don't know it yet.
posted by GenjiandProust at 2:52 PM on June 8, 2016 [32 favorites]


This is perfect. It's a whole page of pure joy and awesomeness. Great post!
posted by mochapickle at 2:55 PM on June 8, 2016 [2 favorites]


I'm 33. I'm more comfortable and happy with my body than I've ever ever been. I can't think I'm the only one.
posted by Emma May Smith at 2:49 PM on June 8


I read something about that once. Somewhere other than the OKTrends blog, even, if I recall correctly. That many women in their 30s do tend to be more confident in their bodies than when they were in their 20s; with the experience to know what they like to do and do not like to do with their bodies, and to better advocate for that in relationships than when they were younger.
posted by eviemath at 2:56 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


When I grew up, older women were always more glamorous and well-dressed than younger women, so I looked forward to reach 30, the beginning of the glamorous age. And it was true - everything was more fun after 30, including I couldn't care less dressing up, down and all around
posted by mumimor at 2:58 PM on June 8, 2016 [4 favorites]


I'm 48. I wear a lot of hoodies and graphic tees. Recently I frequently combine them with my Blåkläder kilt. I wear socks with sandals. I do not shave my legs. I wear belt buckles that I made from circuit boards.

Apparently I'm too old to give a fuck and that's fine with me. Good post, by the way!
posted by Too-Ticky at 3:10 PM on June 8, 2016 [28 favorites]


When I grow up I want to be Helen Mirren.

Yeahhh...I'm a dude, and when I grow up I want to be Helen Mirren too.
posted by sexyrobot at 3:11 PM on June 8, 2016 [29 favorites]


There is some fantastic style going on in that article.
posted by bongo_x at 3:14 PM on June 8, 2016


Helen Mirren should be the new James Bond.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 3:20 PM on June 8, 2016 [50 favorites]


I was hoping to see a few miniskirts and less head to toe covered up looks, but other than that this is awesome.

Also...contrary to popular belief, or whatever it is - long hair is not aging. I'm keeping my long locks forevahhhh.
posted by the webmistress at 3:24 PM on June 8, 2016 [7 favorites]


When I grew up, older women were always more glamorous and well-dressed than younger women, so I looked forward to reach 30, the beginning of the glamorous age. And it was true - everything was more fun after 30, including I couldn't care less dressing up, down and all around

posted by mumimor


I love this so much. Yep, I'm another 30s woman who agrees, my 30s are so much more fabulous than my 20s were. I'm so much happier with my body -- even as I have the body my anorexic 20s self thought she'd rather die than have.
posted by fiercecupcake at 3:29 PM on June 8, 2016 [9 favorites]


I wear whatever the fuck I want but some lady who works at the credit union my wife uses just literally laughed in my face for what I was wearing. I'm 41. So yeah.
posted by Annika Cicada at 3:30 PM on June 8, 2016 [5 favorites]


You should laugh right back, Annika.
posted by mochapickle at 3:32 PM on June 8, 2016 [44 favorites]


Nodding. Thank you. I needed that :-)
posted by Annika Cicada at 3:35 PM on June 8, 2016 [11 favorites]


some lady who works at the credit union my wife uses just literally laughed in my face for what I was wearing

Apparently ignorance and rudeness never go out of style.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 3:46 PM on June 8, 2016 [11 favorites]


14. That's right up my street, especially that clutch.
posted by droplet at 3:47 PM on June 8, 2016


I'm 33. I'm more comfortable and happy with my body than I've ever ever been. I can't think I'm the only one.
posted by Emma May Smith at 5:49 PM on June 8 [2 favorites +] [!]


You are not. I was just thinking that yesterday as I dropped my daughter off at school while wearing short running shorts and a tank and a pretty substantial (albeit athletic) body type. 25 year old me would have quelled before everyone. 40 year old me is out of fucks to give beyond those pertaining whether I am comfortable and don't have to change to go for my long run.
posted by gaspode at 3:50 PM on June 8, 2016 [8 favorites]


I remember Fran Lebowitz wearing pretty much that same exact outfit on Letterman's show in the early 80's. She seems just as comfortable in it now as she did then.
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:52 PM on June 8, 2016 [2 favorites]


same point made in inverse fashion: Top 20 things NO WOMAN should wear after 30
posted by Gymnopedist at 3:52 PM on June 8, 2016 [22 favorites]


You could almost fill a thimble with what I know about fashion, but it seems to be that one thing that seemingly everyone - of any age, gender or style profile - can wear and look good in is Converse sneakers (or their many knockoffs).
posted by The Card Cheat at 3:53 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


True, but for those of us over 30 (or turning 40 in 2 days, as it were), I suggest the new Chuck II version - they have a much more supportive sole. I don't have a pair yet but my boyfriend does and swears he'll never go back.
posted by misskaz at 3:55 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


An interviewer once asked Fran Lebowitz what was the most valuable thing she owned.
Lebowitz responded, "English".
(I love Fran Lebowitz.)
posted by Multicellular Exothermic at 4:04 PM on June 8, 2016 [7 favorites]


That is sort of Fran Lebowitz's uniform. Unfortunately, as you'll see in the article I linked, she does not think that just anyone should wear whatever the fuck they want:
If you're naturally beautiful, wear what you want, but that's .01% of people. Most people just aren't good looking enough to wear what they have on. They should change. They should get some slacks and a nice overcoat.... I think it's hilarious that so many people think they look fantastic, because they're wearing clothes that you should only wear if you look fantastic. If you walked around New York you would think there was a terrible mirror famine.
As such, I wish that - as great as she looks - she hadn't been included in this particular piece.
posted by sockermom at 4:05 PM on June 8, 2016 [16 favorites]


Helen Mirren should be the new James Bond.

Warren Ellis recently tweeted:

Choices for next James Bond:
1) Idris Elba
2) Tilda Swinton
3)


Now we can fill in #3. :)
posted by Celsius1414 at 4:10 PM on June 8, 2016 [11 favorites]


Ok. Can we have a talk about clutches? How are they better than just holding your stuff? They make me so mad! (Not when other people have them.) There are all these cute things that I would totally get if they just had even a little strap...
posted by Night_owl at 4:11 PM on June 8, 2016 [7 favorites]


Helen Mirren should be the new James Bond.

She's already played that role in the Red movies. I think she should reprise Angelina Jolie's role as Grendel's mother in the Beowulf reboot. I can totally see her eating an entire hall full of Vikings.
posted by Bringer Tom at 4:18 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


[Couple comments deleted. This is absolutely the wrong thread to come in and dictate fashion choices for other people. Thanks. ]
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 4:44 PM on June 8, 2016 [32 favorites]


Nice clothing. But some of those hairstyles are fantastic. Sally McGraw (Already Pretty), I'm looking at you.
posted by datawrangler at 4:57 PM on June 8, 2016 [1 favorite]


Margaret Cho's fanny pack though! Never did I think I would like the fanny pack look but she has proved me wrong. Anyone know where you can get this fine butt bag? I probably can't afford it can I?
posted by Cuke at 5:05 PM on June 8, 2016 [5 favorites]


I'm 33. I'm more comfortable and happy with my body than I've ever ever been. I can't think I'm the only one.

I call this fuckopause. As in, plum out of fucks to give. It's grand.
posted by soren_lorensen at 5:11 PM on June 8, 2016 [37 favorites]


Etsy seems to have a lot of leather fanny packs listed, Cuke. Also search under some of the other terms, like belt bag, hip bag, and so on.)
posted by Squeak Attack at 5:14 PM on June 8, 2016 [1 favorite]


I can't wear Chucks any more. Too many foot problems :(
posted by Peach at 5:23 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


Oh Chucks. So narrow. I was excited for the Chucks II, but they are as narrow as the traditional ones.
posted by Squeak Attack at 5:24 PM on June 8, 2016


Cuke: "Margaret Cho's fanny pack though! Never did I think I would like the fanny pack look but she has proved me wrong."

Like, seriously, right? That leather fanny pack is causing me an existential crisis, questioning everything I've ever known or believed about this universe.
posted by mhum at 5:51 PM on June 8, 2016 [5 favorites]


I was digging this from the very first-- 24 is luminous, 23 is pure joy, 22 is the essence of elegance-- and then got to 21 and it was like the moment after a thunderclap:

21 is exactly what I never knew I always wanted to wear. The long, sweeping shapes! The saturated blocks of color! THE TURBAN!

And then I followed the link to Beatrix Ost's website, and it turns out that there is apparently no metric by which she is not one of the most amazing humans ever.

I love all of this so, so much.
posted by palmcorder_yajna at 5:51 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


I wish they'd included Jenny Beavan, who got shocked looks from some of the Academy Awards audience with her 'comfortable wear' as she walked by.

As she was picking up her second Academy Award, for costume design (and 10 time nominee), I figure she's as much of an expert as you can find about wearing whatever the fuck you want.
posted by eye of newt at 6:08 PM on June 8, 2016 [32 favorites]


24, in black, is pretty much my look of choice, if I can be bothered. 21 is glorious, and I would absolutely wear that. My going to the grocery outfit is usually black harem style cotton pants, some sort of black long shirt, and if I'm feeling it, one of my many tiaras. As you do.

And my children, if you think 30 was liberating, girl...lemme tell you about the beautiful, magnificent thing called menopause. For you will find that the garden in which you grew your fucks has become barren, and you no longer have any fucks to give. It's fantastic. Also, no more periods. And you've aged out of the Male Gaze. Y'all, aarp age is amazing. Almost as good as Helen mirren.
posted by SecretAgentSockpuppet at 6:10 PM on June 8, 2016 [30 favorites]


How is Gabourey Sidibe 33? In my head she's perpetually just in her early twenties, how can she be grown up already?

I thought the smart money was on Gillian Anderson as the new James Bond. Throw in John Boyega as the Bond Girl arm candy, and you'd have genderswitch dynamite. Anderson in a tux, Boyega in a swimsuit. Excuse me, I must go to my bunk.
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 6:11 PM on June 8, 2016 [22 favorites]


Well played. My immediate reaction to the headline was to angrily comment 'whatever the fuck they want'. Thankfully I used my magic superpower of looking at the article before flipping out.

Number 20 is clearly a mermaid.
posted by adept256 at 6:13 PM on June 8, 2016 [4 favorites]


Two minor suggestions for this piece of wonderfulness. a) It applies to women as soon as they reach their own personal age of opinion (that might be 1 day, week, month, year, 5 years or 30 and b) it doesn't need to cost a fortune to be fabulous and yourself.
posted by vers at 6:15 PM on June 8, 2016 [2 favorites]


I am currently wearing afterpants (flannel pajama pants with cryptically patterned bears!) and a hoodie. And a cat on my shins. It is marvelous (also, I am not planning on leaving the house again tonight). And so is everything everyone is wearing in the link.
posted by rtha at 6:41 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


If Tilda Swinton were Bond, I would actually pay to see a Bond movie. OMG. I would probably write fanfic, too, and that is not a typical response for me.
posted by Frowner at 6:47 PM on June 8, 2016 [5 favorites]


I am currently wearing afterpants (flannel pajama pants with cryptically patterned bears!)

PLEASE tell me where I can find cryptic bear pants.
posted by pemberkins at 6:49 PM on June 8, 2016


I think I bought them on sale on eddiebauer.com, last year. They don't seem to have them right now, but it's mostly summer stuff, so keep an eye out? They are pretty perfect, as flannel cryptic bear pants go.
posted by rtha at 6:52 PM on June 8, 2016 [2 favorites]


"There are all these cute things that I would totally get if they just had even a little strap..."

Make sure you peek inside them at the store! Lots of them have a strap tucked inside, or else little rings that flip out that you can attach your own strap to!

I like how after you're past 30 you can wear WAY CRAZIER JEWELRY without anyone thinking it's out of line. The older you get, the wilder society agrees your jewelry can be. Also hats.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 6:53 PM on June 8, 2016 [11 favorites]


Also hats.

This is...intriguing. I like it.
posted by Annika Cicada at 6:57 PM on June 8, 2016


Even Fran Lebowitz' hating is stylish. I can't not love it :/

I love this post also, thanks, wonton endangerment!
posted by cotton dress sock at 7:05 PM on June 8, 2016 [1 favorite]


Thank you, sockermom! I was surprised by Fran Lebowitz's inclusion on this too. Not my first choice for a "don't be judgy about people's clothing" list.
posted by queensissy at 7:27 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


yeah, she's awful, but brilliantly so, it's hard ("mirror famine", come on)

i want fran lebowitz to tear my outfit to shreds
posted by cotton dress sock at 7:38 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


Peach and Squeak Attack, I find that Chucks have room for my prescription orthotics. Possibly their cachet involves their casual flatness, even their suggestion of a youthful sturdiness of arch. But that's misleading. I'm in my fifties and love my red hightops.
posted by girandole at 7:48 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


I would wear Chucks with inserts if I could cram my freakishly wide forefoot past that part where the toe cap starts! I have triangle feet - wide across the front and much narrower in the heel. I've been wearing red Keds with arch inserts recently, though, which are fun.
posted by Squeak Attack at 8:06 PM on June 8, 2016 [1 favorite]


Part of why I like my Chucks is that I have somewhat narrow feet--not enough to really buy narrow-width shoes, but enough that mine do seem to fit better than other such shoes I've had. But I like them better now that they have inserts in them and I re-laced them in such a way as to shorten up the laces a bit. I kind of prefer shoes now that don't have much built-in arch support because it gives me more room to buy the inserts I like and modify as necessary, instead of relying on someone else's idea of what I need.
posted by Sequence at 8:45 PM on June 8, 2016 [1 favorite]


This lady is one of my Flickr contacts. I've been admiring her style for years and years. Her photos are pretty f***ing cool too.
posted by WalkerWestridge at 9:03 PM on June 8, 2016 [2 favorites]


Anyone know what the brand of boots the dude is wearing in Too-Ticky's link? Are they boots sold on the same site?

I can't zoom in on the device that I am using. Also Danish...

My goodness, I have always loved men who will wear a kilt or skirt.

Also, I have super duper high arches and had to give up on Chuck's.
posted by futz at 9:48 PM on June 8, 2016


For me, that phase came right after childbirth. Everyone thinks "given up on herself" is an insult - for me it was incredibly liberating.
posted by Omnomnom at 9:52 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


Smaller but wider feet? The trick is larger sizes of youth boys' or smaller men's, especially of gender-neutral shoes like Chucks. (I'm a 6.5-7 women's wide, hell yes I will pay less for a boys' size shoe.)

One thing I notice comes up sometimes is the idea that men can wear a de facto uniform, but it's harder for women to pull that off. Having remembered that, and getting frustrated with slack availability for short people with large hips, I decided today to buy four more pairs of The Pants That Fit And Have Pockets and a bunch of polo shirts and be done choosing work outfits.
posted by cobaltnine at 9:58 PM on June 8, 2016 [3 favorites]


I have wedge-shaped feet but Chucks work great for me. And mine are even unusually wide at the front, so many other shoes don't fit. Perhaps the secret is just to buy them longer, or maybe I'm just lucky. But, yeah, I almost always buy the men's Chucks. So maybe they are actually cut differently.

I also wear my orthotics in them, which makes a big difference in the comfort.
posted by litlnemo at 10:17 PM on June 8, 2016 [1 favorite]


No. 23 is a picture of Barbara McReynolds & Gai Gherardi, who own L.A. Eyeworks. I buy frames there every October during their annual sale, which has lines out the door. The woman with the yellow glasses in that picture is always at the counter, and always having a blast.

Thanks for the post, wonton endangerment! It's inspiring. Lately I've hired a nice young man to make patterns from my three favorite pieces of clothing - wide-legged pants, camisole, and long jacket. So now all I have to do is shop for the cloth (so much more fun than shopping for clothes), specify what it's for, and receive the gorgeous finished pieces. It's sorta amazing how much cheaper and more fun this is.
posted by goofyfoot at 10:28 PM on June 8, 2016 [14 favorites]


goofyfoot, tell us more! How do you find someone to make clothes for you? I wouldn't know where to start.
posted by orrnyereg at 10:41 PM on June 8, 2016 [2 favorites]


Orrnyerg, for me the connection was happenstance - this person works at my local branch library, where I volunteer; his mother taught him how to sew. But I wonder if I could have just looked into whatever equivalent of a phone book currently is and asked around for an enthusiastic tailor.
posted by goofyfoot at 11:11 PM on June 8, 2016


futz: Anyone know what the brand of boots the dude is wearing in Too-Ticky's link? Are they boots sold on the same site?

Can't be sure, sorry, the image is just too small. They're some type of safety boots for sure, and they might even be Blåkläder, maybe these? Many safety boots are really cool though... I want to get me some Red Bricks.

Thinking further about what I said, now that I'm sober:
I do actually give several fucks. I care about what I look like; I'm in fact quite picky. It's just that I don't care what other people think of it.
posted by Too-Ticky at 11:45 PM on June 8, 2016 [7 favorites]


Some of these remind me of the Kulturtant concept-- very much funky glasses and no fucks plus a lot of Marrimekko.

I'm ready to bring back turbans too.
posted by travertina at 3:58 AM on June 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


Goofyfoot - I am also in L.A. If this young man would like more work, please memail me. Also, I'm at the WeHo library every month for a meeting. Is that where you work?
posted by Sophie1 at 6:37 AM on June 9, 2016


ormyereg & sophie1: i have found people willing to pattern existing pieces of clothing or make things for me (sometimes just from pictures) at universities with a fashion/textile/design department or really good costume shop at their theatre. Varying levels of success. If you have a vocational high school near you, you might also have success but you'd probably have to go through the appropriate administrator.

If you look in your local craigslist or community message boards, you might find people who have small clothing shops or something similar who run sewing classes or sewing studios who often have students willing to take on that sort of work.
posted by crush-onastick at 6:42 AM on June 9, 2016


At risk of being That Person, while I certainly admire many things about Helen Mirren, it kind of bums me out when she's suggested as THE proof that even older women can be sexy. I mean, she has the kind of body that People Magazine happily features in a bikini, at seventy-whatever, which is cool for her. Great news, everybody! Very slender older white women who fit into a narrow definition of beauty can be ... beautiful!
posted by chesty_a_arthur at 7:10 AM on June 9, 2016 [3 favorites]


But, yeah, I almost always buy the men's Chucks. So maybe they are actually cut differently.

The classic Chucks are unisex - women just buy two sizes smaller. The Target Converse were different, had men's sizes and women's size's and were a looser fit. I miss the Target Converse.

However, last night I had a squee fit because I figured out that Converse is once again producing the One Star. I wore One Stars all through the 90s (grunge/garage kiddy) because they fit me better than the Chucks; probably because they don't have the hard rubber toe cap) (my feet are really tall as well as wedgey.)

Anyway, I'm excited to order a pair and continue wearing whatever the fuck I want (hoodie, t-shirt, jeans, cool sneakers mostly.)
posted by Squeak Attack at 7:12 AM on June 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


I'd like to nominate Ruth Bader Ginsburg for the list of style icons. I love how she dresses up her robe with a fancy jabot, and I love her street style. Turbans! Gloves!

If anyone's looking for Chuck-like shoes, I bought myself a pair of Palladium shoes that can be worn as hi-tops or low and I like 'em a whole bunch. Admittedly, I don't have special feet needs beyond "flat and some tread." And thanks to making this recommendation, I'm trying reeeeally hard to not buy these low profile purple guys. I swear I'm not getting paid for this.
posted by giraffe at 7:51 AM on June 9, 2016 [9 favorites]


Supergas can also scratch the Chucks itch!
posted by ersatzkat at 8:33 AM on June 9, 2016


I probably shouldn't have given her the pageviews, but I did actually find and read the Kallie Provencher articles that inspired this. Wow. They were so thin, so poorly reasoned, so casually hateful, and so so devoid of awareness that not everyone has tons of money that I just-- Well, I wanted to bite though my screen and tear them off the internet with my teeth.

And if that wasn't enough, her lists were wrong too. Women over 30 shouldn't wear sparkly pants or oversized sunglasses? Lunacy. Everyone knows that women over 70 kill in those.
posted by palmcorder_yajna at 8:46 AM on June 9, 2016 [3 favorites]


On reflection, if you're exactly 30 you should probably just wear whatever the fuck you want.
posted by aspersioncast at 9:02 AM on June 9, 2016


some lady who works at the credit union my wife uses just literally laughed in my face for what I was wearing

Earlier this year a 50-60ish saleswoman at a very expensive lingerie store told me I was "brave" for wearing what I was wearing (probably a colorful patterned shirt with a colorful sweater). I looked at her clothes and told her that wearing all black seemed like a sad life. Her subtle insult wasn't an insult to me. *shrug* I grew up in the 80s/90s so if it's not silver or neon it's conservative in my mind. To each her own.
posted by Bunglegirl at 9:14 AM on June 9, 2016 [4 favorites]


At some point, I realized how much I hate the way women's clothing is designed and made and sold, and how very hard it is to put together outfits and to look good, serious, and be comfortable is nearly impossible. I bought a bunch of pretty well made (LL Bean, Lands End, GH Bass) fine-gauge cotton sweaters and cotton tshirts. And well-made trousers and some skirts. When I worked at a job where I wanted to look professional, I wore a uniform of cardigan or v-neck, probably a tshirt underneath, pants or skirt/ tights. GH Bass no longer makes my size loafers in wide, so I wear loafer-ish shoes. It doesn't take long to get dressed because most of the colors work well together. I don't care what color is popular this season; if it isn't a color that suits me, not buying it. Not comfortable? Nope. Can I move in it? Okay. It has to be washable and preferably not made in a sweatshop. I recently realized that lots of my wardrobe is @ 10 years old and going strong, so it's good value. This is how men dress. They don't have to think Does this blue linen shirt really go with the navy pants? I get dressed in a few minutes.

Where I get judgmental is watching the morning 'news' shows. Men wear suits. Women seem to have to wear skintight sleeveless cocktail party dresses and very high heels. Once in a while I watch The View. I love Whoopi Goldberg anyway, but even more because she wears jeans and enormous billowy tops, or shapeless shifts, and she always wears funky shoes. Whatever the fuck she wants.
posted by theora55 at 9:57 AM on June 9, 2016 [7 favorites]


Theora, you almost exactly described Mrs. VTX. The only difference is that she found a specific Franca Sarto shoe that she really likes so she just buys a pair when they get cheap and they stay in the box until her current pair has worn out. As a fellow wide-footed person, I can relate, and I think you should do the same if/when you find the right shoe.

But us men DO still have to think about what we wear. It's certainly easier but I did have to take a minute or two this morning to find a shirt that would work with my gray suit and dark brown shoes.

I think that the thing that makes men's office clothing easier is that men tend to be shaped the same way so men's clothing is cut the same way and there just isn't a lot of variation. The difference in the different types of dress shirts are pretty minor details (button-down collars, spread collars, French vs. normal cuffs). The rest is fit and color. Additionally, men's clothing is based on measurements. Because collar size is measured in inches, I know that if a 16" collar on a Brooks Brother's shirt fits me, a 16" collar on a J Crew shirt will fit as well. Waist sizes on pants have some vanity sizing to them but most brands are pretty close in how much they do it. So I can measure my waist at 40" and know that it will translate to a 36" size for most brands of pants. When I order clothes on the internet, I usually know that they fit me without trying them on.

So when Mrs. VTX finds something that fits her really well, we buy a bunch of that thing in every color it will look good on her in.
posted by VTX at 11:22 AM on June 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


These are great! I love the diversity; how every woman is eminently herself.

I've been delighted at the teal fad lately, to be honest. I have about a dozen tops and cardigans in differing shades of teal, candles in dark-medium-light teal (one in a nice sapphire to set them off), paper boxes in teal, a desk lamp in teal (wut! it's teal!!), socks in teal, and a hat in teal. I plan to get teal paint for my living room pretty soon. TEAM TEAL.

And this is because I know it'll go out of style in a year or two, but I'll still have all my teal awesomeness. Just like I still have loads of burgundy and purple awesomeness from years ago.

If black doesn't work for you, navy is a great color for setting off other colors. Of course, so are other colors, as the women in the FPP so brilliantly show.
posted by fraula at 12:09 PM on June 9, 2016 [5 favorites]


And you can wear the teal and purple together!

I saw a woman today wearing a royal purple top and a pair of pants that was something like a dark magenta. If you had asked me today if one should wear those two items together, I would have said never in a million years. But it looked excellent. I wish I had better style.
posted by Night_owl at 3:55 PM on June 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


At 30, I am finally figuring out my uniform. I still wear a lot of vintage dresses (especially shirtdresses) but when I don't want to sweat all over a vintage dress or I just want to be a little more comfy, I wear solid-color fitted tees with a high-waisted, full knee-length skirt in a coordinating print. I started making basic pleated skirts from my extensive hoard of thrifted fabric, and it's great-- I pleat a long rectangle down to my waist measurement in 1" pleats (to do this, measure your waist and multiply by 3), add a waistband and zip, and hem.

I've made like 6 of them in the last few months and I plan to make lots more. When I need to look semi-respectable I wear one in a plainer fabric (stripes or florals) when I want to be more fun I go for the crazy novelty prints (crossword puzzles, army men, Star Wars). In the winter I can just add tights and a cardigan. I can totally see myself dressing this way for the next 40 years.
posted by nonasuch at 6:12 PM on June 9, 2016 [5 favorites]


giraffe, I have been lusting after Palladium shoes for some time now. I was online earlier today shoe shopping and had actually forgotten about them till I read your comment. I thought that I had picked out a pair of Teva's after 2 days of research but now I want a pair of Palladium's! You have sent me into a spiral want vs need. Arg. I also am coveting a raffia cowboyish hat and and and...

This post has helped to remind me that I can wear what I want regardless of my age. I miss my funky self. Being homebound due to chronic pain means that I mostly wear sweats or jammies. I really need to bring some fun back into my life.
posted by futz at 11:09 PM on June 9, 2016 [2 favorites]


I saw a woman today wearing a royal purple top and a pair of pants that was something like a dark magenta.

Pink pants are deceptively versatile. Green too.
posted by maryr at 4:37 AM on June 10, 2016


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