All 12 Star Trek Movies Ranked
June 15, 2016 11:45 PM Subscribe
Well...I agree with the placement of Wrath of Khan as the best Trek film. Other than that...nice use of fonts, I guess?
posted by happyroach at 12:02 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by happyroach at 12:02 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
*pinches bridge of nose* do we mean which Star Trek movies are good or which ones are good Star Trek movies cause those are very different things.
first contact is a good movie in that it's a fun action sci-fi adventure kinda related to Star Trek but a shitty Star Trek movie cause it's all about violence as a means to an end it makes Picard a brute and it's all about battles and being vicious .
The voyage home is a meandering, low key, muddled movie but it's GREAT Star Trek. Everyone is in character, the solution is non violence, and there's HGH concept goofy crap and a general feel globe.
Both of these movies involve time travel
posted by The Whelk at 12:08 AM on June 16, 2016 [33 favorites]
first contact is a good movie in that it's a fun action sci-fi adventure kinda related to Star Trek but a shitty Star Trek movie cause it's all about violence as a means to an end it makes Picard a brute and it's all about battles and being vicious .
The voyage home is a meandering, low key, muddled movie but it's GREAT Star Trek. Everyone is in character, the solution is non violence, and there's HGH concept goofy crap and a general feel globe.
Both of these movies involve time travel
posted by The Whelk at 12:08 AM on June 16, 2016 [33 favorites]
Oh hell no to this list.
Basically there's Khan and then there's TMO and then the other ones are just sort of there. The Whale one is fun I guess.
posted by Artw at 12:10 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Basically there's Khan and then there's TMO and then the other ones are just sort of there. The Whale one is fun I guess.
posted by Artw at 12:10 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
KHHHAAAANNN
posted by a lungful of dragon at 12:18 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by a lungful of dragon at 12:18 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Also Insurrection and Geherations ranking above, well, much of anything TBH, is frankly bizarre.
posted by Artw at 12:19 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by Artw at 12:19 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
You know , Generations was kind of a shittymovie, but it was a great distillation of the themes and issues TNG kept going to and kept the characters sons instant . so its a pretty good Star Trek movie if not a good movie.
posted by The Whelk at 12:19 AM on June 16, 2016
posted by The Whelk at 12:19 AM on June 16, 2016
Well, they all have their Pros, and their Khans.
posted by oneswellfoop at 12:22 AM on June 16, 2016 [53 favorites]
posted by oneswellfoop at 12:22 AM on June 16, 2016 [53 favorites]
As a critical Star Trek lover it is kind of embarrassing that there has never been an excellent Star Trek movie. Wrath of Khan is, just ok, but it does not hold up that well as an action movie and not as interesting from an explores culture/alienness/philosophy angle as much of the better trek.
And after wrath of Khan you just have nothing even arguable as a good movie. The Star Trek reboot is a nonsense superhero action film that has nothing at all to do with the point of star trek (enjoyable enough to watch from a whizz bang but there is hardly a shortage of better action sf superhero movies !), I mean this list puts Star Trek: First Contact as second which is a decent two part TV episode (but probably out of the top 25 episodes of TNG) and certainly not coherent as a movie. And the second best OS movie is "the one with the Whale" which says it all.
Perhaps what makes startrek good just works better within the constraints of a TV show? Hardly an original thought but....
posted by Another Fine Product From The Nonsense Factory at 12:24 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
And after wrath of Khan you just have nothing even arguable as a good movie. The Star Trek reboot is a nonsense superhero action film that has nothing at all to do with the point of star trek (enjoyable enough to watch from a whizz bang but there is hardly a shortage of better action sf superhero movies !), I mean this list puts Star Trek: First Contact as second which is a decent two part TV episode (but probably out of the top 25 episodes of TNG) and certainly not coherent as a movie. And the second best OS movie is "the one with the Whale" which says it all.
Perhaps what makes startrek good just works better within the constraints of a TV show? Hardly an original thought but....
posted by Another Fine Product From The Nonsense Factory at 12:24 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Wrath of Khan is just so, so good. Plot, structure, pacing, characters, stakes, emotions, score, all second to none. It's my favorite space movie by a long shot.
To the above comment, it's not supposed to be an action movie. It's a chess match.
posted by Dokterrock at 12:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
To the above comment, it's not supposed to be an action movie. It's a chess match.
posted by Dokterrock at 12:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
To the above comment, it's not supposed to be an action movie. It's a chess match.
But the point made was that it isn't as good at being what it is as is the best of Trek on TV. It's a good film, but I think it's reasonable to argue that it is eclipsed, many times, by high points of the TV show. Which is probably just the medium. Thoughtful and intelligent populist entertainment is easier, I think, with shorter run-times and smaller budgets.
posted by howfar at 12:50 AM on June 16, 2016
But the point made was that it isn't as good at being what it is as is the best of Trek on TV. It's a good film, but I think it's reasonable to argue that it is eclipsed, many times, by high points of the TV show. Which is probably just the medium. Thoughtful and intelligent populist entertainment is easier, I think, with shorter run-times and smaller budgets.
posted by howfar at 12:50 AM on June 16, 2016
Before the anniversary specials come and the 13th Trek movie enters the canon,
And here's where I realized the author and I have incompatible views.
posted by Pater Aletheias at 1:02 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
And here's where I realized the author and I have incompatible views.
posted by Pater Aletheias at 1:02 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
The problem with ranked lists like this is only of them can be the worst. But in fact, over half of them are the worst.
posted by aubilenon at 1:14 AM on June 16, 2016 [22 favorites]
posted by aubilenon at 1:14 AM on June 16, 2016 [22 favorites]
But the point made was that it isn't as good at being what it is as is the best of Trek on TV. It's a good film, but I think it's reasonable to argue that it is eclipsed, many times, by high points of the TV show.
I guess if that's what the article was about, sure. But we're specifically talking about the movies, and if you're judging this on its merits as an action movie, not only are you going to have a bad time, you're really overlooking some quality filmmaking. Just seems like a weird critique to me, knocking something for not achieving what it didn't set out to do. I mean, I didn't even laugh one time during First Blood.
posted by Dokterrock at 1:16 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
yo they left out GalaxyQuest for some weird reason
posted by DoctorFedora at 1:39 AM on June 16, 2016 [43 favorites]
posted by DoctorFedora at 1:39 AM on June 16, 2016 [43 favorites]
I am a person with Strong Opinions on Star Trek. For instance, my favorite Trek show of all time is DS9 by a long shot, but I also freely admit it is the least Trekky Trek that ever Trekked. R. D. Moore added, like, money. And prostitution. Religion. "Freedom fighters." And DS9 features one of the greatest episodes of sci-fi television ever written, Far Beyond the Stars. I tell you this because it explains why I hate this ranking of Trek movies.
The Undiscovered Country must be first, followed by First Contact and then Khan. This is entirely because of my age, which is 40. The Cold War story just resonated strongly with me and gave a younger me hope for a future not made of nuclear winter. First Contact is next because, duh, the Borg. The Best of Both Worlds I/II was one of the best things to happen to TNG and I thought Frakes did a fantastic job directing the conclusion to the Borg story. I liked the silly humor and Picard's realization that he essentially has Borg-induced PTSD also stuck a chord with me. On its own, Khan could be first. The dying Spock scene is classic and moving. But because The Search for Spock happened, that scene no longer affects me the way it did the first time I saw it.
The new movies? For me, yawn fests. I am utterly bored by reboots/re-imaginings. Honestly, I was hoping for a broken and fractured Federation still reeling from the infiltration of Starfleet Command by changelings and weakened by the huge conflict initiated by Odo's people. Instead we've got Kirk and Spock bathed in lens flare and "shocking" us with a Kirk/Spock switcharoo in the Khan reboot. Shiny and slightly entertaining, but meh.
posted by xyzzy at 1:44 AM on June 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
The Undiscovered Country must be first, followed by First Contact and then Khan. This is entirely because of my age, which is 40. The Cold War story just resonated strongly with me and gave a younger me hope for a future not made of nuclear winter. First Contact is next because, duh, the Borg. The Best of Both Worlds I/II was one of the best things to happen to TNG and I thought Frakes did a fantastic job directing the conclusion to the Borg story. I liked the silly humor and Picard's realization that he essentially has Borg-induced PTSD also stuck a chord with me. On its own, Khan could be first. The dying Spock scene is classic and moving. But because The Search for Spock happened, that scene no longer affects me the way it did the first time I saw it.
The new movies? For me, yawn fests. I am utterly bored by reboots/re-imaginings. Honestly, I was hoping for a broken and fractured Federation still reeling from the infiltration of Starfleet Command by changelings and weakened by the huge conflict initiated by Odo's people. Instead we've got Kirk and Spock bathed in lens flare and "shocking" us with a Kirk/Spock switcharoo in the Khan reboot. Shiny and slightly entertaining, but meh.
posted by xyzzy at 1:44 AM on June 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
Honestly, I was hoping for a broken and fractured Federation still reeling from the infiltration of Starfleet Command by changelings and weakened by the huge conflict initiated by Odo's people.
DS9 was my favorite series as well, and I would have loved to have seen a movie-length exploration of Starfleet's post-Dominion War Darkest Timeline, in the vein of In the Pale Moonlight. The reboot flicks are like one long Tumblr gifset.
posted by Svejk at 1:51 AM on June 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
DS9 was my favorite series as well, and I would have loved to have seen a movie-length exploration of Starfleet's post-Dominion War Darkest Timeline, in the vein of In the Pale Moonlight. The reboot flicks are like one long Tumblr gifset.
posted by Svejk at 1:51 AM on June 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
DS9 was my favorite series as well, and I would have loved to have seen a movie-length exploration of Starfleet's post-Dominion War Darkest Timeline,
Or even, maybe, gasp, a TV series that did that, instead of Enterprise. Blech.
I did have to agree with his characterization of Nemesis. I can never remember what happens in it either, nor Insurrection for that matter. I always get them confused.
Also, apparently I am the only Trek fan who never liked the stupid whale movie. But then, except for First Contact, I pretty much always dislike Trek time travel.
Into Darkness wasn't even a very good space action move, let alone a Star Trek movie.
posted by DiscourseMarker at 2:08 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Or even, maybe, gasp, a TV series that did that, instead of Enterprise. Blech.
I did have to agree with his characterization of Nemesis. I can never remember what happens in it either, nor Insurrection for that matter. I always get them confused.
Also, apparently I am the only Trek fan who never liked the stupid whale movie. But then, except for First Contact, I pretty much always dislike Trek time travel.
Into Darkness wasn't even a very good space action move, let alone a Star Trek movie.
posted by DiscourseMarker at 2:08 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
The opinions of the many outweigh the opinions of the few.
posted by fairmettle at 3:09 AM on June 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by fairmettle at 3:09 AM on June 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
I think I am luckier than others here, my mind mostly draws a blank on III (and on Insurrection), which means I get to keep WofK as No 1.
But I really like the 2009 film, I love the bit where the enterprise comes popping out and shoots all the Romulan torpedoes with its rapid firing phasers (torpedoes?) even though this doesn't make a lot of sense topographically and is strongly revisionary in their usage and probably made multiple people in this thread tut. (This one) Obviously I despise the most recent film, like any normal person.
I also am underwhelmed by the whale film. Its only saving graces are transparent aluminum and the emergence of 'nuclear wessels' as a meme.
posted by biffa at 3:48 AM on June 16, 2016
But I really like the 2009 film, I love the bit where the enterprise comes popping out and shoots all the Romulan torpedoes with its rapid firing phasers (torpedoes?) even though this doesn't make a lot of sense topographically and is strongly revisionary in their usage and probably made multiple people in this thread tut. (This one) Obviously I despise the most recent film, like any normal person.
I also am underwhelmed by the whale film. Its only saving graces are transparent aluminum and the emergence of 'nuclear wessels' as a meme.
posted by biffa at 3:48 AM on June 16, 2016
I am... surprisingly OK with this ranking. I think you could quibble about the exact order of those in each third, but which four comprise the best third or which four comprise the worst third seems pretty solid.
posted by mystyk at 4:06 AM on June 16, 2016
posted by mystyk at 4:06 AM on June 16, 2016
I have a friend who doesn't really like Star Trek or any sci fi that much, but in any such conversation he will always ALWAYS loudly announce that Generations is the only good trek movie.
I think it's a test to see how much I like him.
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 4:13 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
I think it's a test to see how much I like him.
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 4:13 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
I'm not even going to click on the link. On the one hand, yes, I love a Trek argument. On the other, I've bitched before about how ranking listicles are the most egregiously click-baity of listicles, and do I really want to encourage Popular Mechanics, of all the fucking things, to get into that game?
Besides, it's obviously II-III-IV as a single trilogy, then VI as the follow-up, then who cares.
posted by Halloween Jack at 4:24 AM on June 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
Besides, it's obviously II-III-IV as a single trilogy, then VI as the follow-up, then who cares.
posted by Halloween Jack at 4:24 AM on June 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
"On the one hand, yes, I love a Trek argument. On the other, I've bitched before about how ranking listicles are the most egregiously click-baity of listicles, and do I really want to encourage Popular Mechanics, of all the fucking things, to get into that game?"On the positive side, it has all 12 movies on 1 page with about 4 in-line ads, not spread out among roughly 8 pages with 20+ in-line ads and a million others...
posted by mystyk at 4:29 AM on June 16, 2016 [9 favorites]
I actually don't hate this list.
I was glad to see TMP ranked so low, because it was and is such a disappointment. It's glacially slow in the first hour. And while "there is something so particularly Star Trek about the core themes," that's because it's a rewrite of a TOS episode, with more gee-whiz graphics, but nothing to say that the TOS episode didn't already say.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 4:45 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I was glad to see TMP ranked so low, because it was and is such a disappointment. It's glacially slow in the first hour. And while "there is something so particularly Star Trek about the core themes," that's because it's a rewrite of a TOS episode, with more gee-whiz graphics, but nothing to say that the TOS episode didn't already say.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 4:45 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
The only reason TMP is a favourite in my heart of hearts is because I was at the NZ premiere and Bones was on stage. Apart from that, the first half was not the Star Trek I grew up with.
posted by arzakh at 4:59 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by arzakh at 4:59 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I wouldn't say that Khan is necessarily a good movie because it has definite flaws and most fans of genre films are willing to accept even mediocre films without much critical analysis.
That being said Khan is extremely fun and basically the only one with repeat watchability so it is clearly the top of the list.
I think most of the rest of them are below Beastmaster in my comprehensive list of genre movies.
Feel free to pile on scorn now
posted by vuron at 5:01 AM on June 16, 2016
That being said Khan is extremely fun and basically the only one with repeat watchability so it is clearly the top of the list.
I think most of the rest of them are below Beastmaster in my comprehensive list of genre movies.
Feel free to pile on scorn now
posted by vuron at 5:01 AM on June 16, 2016
#1 Wrath of Khan
#2 Galaxy Quest
Everything else is open to debate.
posted by fings at 5:23 AM on June 16, 2016 [10 favorites]
#2 Galaxy Quest
Everything else is open to debate.
posted by fings at 5:23 AM on June 16, 2016 [10 favorites]
[Picard, in the Cardassian cell]
THERE... ARE... TEN... MOVIES!!!!!!!!
posted by disconnect at 5:54 AM on June 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
THERE... ARE... TEN... MOVIES!!!!!!!!
posted by disconnect at 5:54 AM on June 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
There is only KHAN.
posted by Bob Regular at 5:55 AM on June 16, 2016
posted by Bob Regular at 5:55 AM on June 16, 2016
I always quite liked Undiscovered Country. Aside from all of the fun stuff (the original Klingon, the Vulcan saying about Nixon going to China), there's the fact that Sulu ends up the Captain of a ship that makes the Enterprise look old and outmoded as Kirk himself.
posted by Ghidorah at 6:00 AM on June 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by Ghidorah at 6:00 AM on June 16, 2016 [8 favorites]
Okay. My list.
Number one? The Wrath Of Khan. It's just the best, period.
Two: The Search For Spock. This has always been THE under-rated Star Trek movie. They blow up the Enterprise. THEY BLOW UP THE ENTERPRISE! Thirteen-year-old me cried his head off, sick with the knowledge that they could bring Spock back, but whatever starship the gang cruised around in from then on, it wasn't going to be the same Enterprise. This movie has always been my own personal landmark for the end of my childhood, so it carries a lot of sentimental weight with me.
Three: The Motion Picture. I've heard it called The Motionless Picture for decades, but honestly, it's not bad, it's just an acquired taste. The opening with the Klingons, Scotty's flyover of the Enterprise, the majestic musical score, the front-and-center philosophical nature of the story, the whole getting the band back together aspect-- those are all good things.
Four: The Undiscovered Country. It has plenty of character banter, end of the cold war metaphors, starship pew-pew battle scenes, Klingons quoting Shakespere, and Kim Cattrall's excellent turn as the substitute Saavik, Valeris.
Five: The Voyage Home. The whole 'save the whales' thing is classic Trek philosophy, and Nimoy made sure all the characters got their chance to shine. It was fun and entertaining as all get-out, but this was also the Trek movie that went out of its way to be accessible to non-fans, and honestly, I've never cared for that aspect of it. Ordinary people always screw up things meant for nerds.
The Rest: The Next Generation movies carry zero emotional weight with me. Which one had the space dune buggies, Insurrection, Nemesis? I can't remember. The original series was a big steak and mashed potatoes, TNG was an unflavored rice cake. (Mrs. Khan still calls their captain Jean-Luc Sissypants.)
Still, I'd rather watch the space dune buggies than endure another viewing of Star Trek V. The less said about, the better.
Tied for last place: the 2009 Star Trek, and Lens Flares Into Darkness.
J.J. Abrams can die immediately, and decay.
posted by KHAAAN! at 6:02 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Number one? The Wrath Of Khan. It's just the best, period.
Two: The Search For Spock. This has always been THE under-rated Star Trek movie. They blow up the Enterprise. THEY BLOW UP THE ENTERPRISE! Thirteen-year-old me cried his head off, sick with the knowledge that they could bring Spock back, but whatever starship the gang cruised around in from then on, it wasn't going to be the same Enterprise. This movie has always been my own personal landmark for the end of my childhood, so it carries a lot of sentimental weight with me.
Three: The Motion Picture. I've heard it called The Motionless Picture for decades, but honestly, it's not bad, it's just an acquired taste. The opening with the Klingons, Scotty's flyover of the Enterprise, the majestic musical score, the front-and-center philosophical nature of the story, the whole getting the band back together aspect-- those are all good things.
Four: The Undiscovered Country. It has plenty of character banter, end of the cold war metaphors, starship pew-pew battle scenes, Klingons quoting Shakespere, and Kim Cattrall's excellent turn as the substitute Saavik, Valeris.
Five: The Voyage Home. The whole 'save the whales' thing is classic Trek philosophy, and Nimoy made sure all the characters got their chance to shine. It was fun and entertaining as all get-out, but this was also the Trek movie that went out of its way to be accessible to non-fans, and honestly, I've never cared for that aspect of it. Ordinary people always screw up things meant for nerds.
The Rest: The Next Generation movies carry zero emotional weight with me. Which one had the space dune buggies, Insurrection, Nemesis? I can't remember. The original series was a big steak and mashed potatoes, TNG was an unflavored rice cake. (Mrs. Khan still calls their captain Jean-Luc Sissypants.)
Still, I'd rather watch the space dune buggies than endure another viewing of Star Trek V. The less said about, the better.
Tied for last place: the 2009 Star Trek, and Lens Flares Into Darkness.
J.J. Abrams can die immediately, and decay.
posted by KHAAAN! at 6:02 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its 5-year mission: to hunt down baddies and blow up their giant spaceships. To seek out old tropes and add lens flares. To boldy go where we've been before.posted by Freaky at 6:06 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
They blow up the Enterprise.
Unfortunately the start of a tradition.
posted by Artw at 6:08 AM on June 16, 2016
Unfortunately the start of a tradition.
posted by Artw at 6:08 AM on June 16, 2016
Let me fix this article and clear up all these arguments!
All 12 Star Trek Movies Ranked By Whether Or Not Patrick Stewart Handsomely Chews Scenery While Misquoting "Moby Dick"
1. Star Trek: First Contact
2-12: Movies that aren't Star Trek: First Contact
there
posted by monster truck weekend at 6:11 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
All 12 Star Trek Movies Ranked By Whether Or Not Patrick Stewart Handsomely Chews Scenery While Misquoting "Moby Dick"
1. Star Trek: First Contact
2-12: Movies that aren't Star Trek: First Contact
there
posted by monster truck weekend at 6:11 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
So, Fanfare rewatch?
From TMP onwards, in order?
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 6:15 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
From TMP onwards, in order?
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 6:15 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Of course, no mention of Jodorowsky's Trek.
posted by sonascope at 6:17 AM on June 16, 2016 [10 favorites]
posted by sonascope at 6:17 AM on June 16, 2016 [10 favorites]
Well, I've been sucked in.
The reboot movies would all be at the bottom of my list. They're great action/sci-fi movies, but they are not quite Star Trek. Next would come all the TNG movies. I love TNG. I think it's the greatest of all the ST series and I'd take Picard over Kirk any day, but the TNG movies didn't capture TNG at all. It's like watching movies written by someone who had TNG described to them over a very poor phone connection.
So that leaves the original series movies. Search for Spock and Final Frontier are a toss-up for the bottom of the list, but that should probably go to Final Frontier. Final Frontier has some fun moments in it, but falls apart quickly. Search for Spock had a kind of space pirate feel to it and the self-destruction of the Enterprise was one of those moments you never forget, but it all feels like a painfully forced story to carry Spock back to life.
The Motion picture at 3. Yes it's long. Yes it's meandering. Yes, someone let the special effects guys spend way too much time making way too many way too long shots. But that tour around the outside of the Enterprise is one of the most iconic scenes of the entire property. And it had a sci-fi story that felt like it was sci-fi to even the characters; what was this monster cloud? Where did it come from? Who made it? Etc.
Two is Khan. Yes, it should be one, but I put it at two. Great connection to the original series. Great story Kirk's actions catching up with him; there ARE consequences in Star Trek! The exciting sci-fi concepts like terraforming and how something that sounds wonderful could be turned into a weapon. But I thought setting up Kirk's son was a wasted subplot, and Khan's dialogue is ridiculously hammy. Maybe you say it's a nod to TOS, but it was over the top.
One is Undiscovered Country. Great actors. Great dialogue. A beautiful way to end the TOS characters' appearances. It had so much to say about our world socially as well as the state of the actors and the property itself. This felt most like a Star Trek movie to me.
If there is to be a brave, new world, our generation is going to have the hardest time living in it.
Perfect! Absolutely perfect.
posted by ruthsarian at 6:17 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
The reboot movies would all be at the bottom of my list. They're great action/sci-fi movies, but they are not quite Star Trek. Next would come all the TNG movies. I love TNG. I think it's the greatest of all the ST series and I'd take Picard over Kirk any day, but the TNG movies didn't capture TNG at all. It's like watching movies written by someone who had TNG described to them over a very poor phone connection.
So that leaves the original series movies. Search for Spock and Final Frontier are a toss-up for the bottom of the list, but that should probably go to Final Frontier. Final Frontier has some fun moments in it, but falls apart quickly. Search for Spock had a kind of space pirate feel to it and the self-destruction of the Enterprise was one of those moments you never forget, but it all feels like a painfully forced story to carry Spock back to life.
The Motion picture at 3. Yes it's long. Yes it's meandering. Yes, someone let the special effects guys spend way too much time making way too many way too long shots. But that tour around the outside of the Enterprise is one of the most iconic scenes of the entire property. And it had a sci-fi story that felt like it was sci-fi to even the characters; what was this monster cloud? Where did it come from? Who made it? Etc.
Two is Khan. Yes, it should be one, but I put it at two. Great connection to the original series. Great story Kirk's actions catching up with him; there ARE consequences in Star Trek! The exciting sci-fi concepts like terraforming and how something that sounds wonderful could be turned into a weapon. But I thought setting up Kirk's son was a wasted subplot, and Khan's dialogue is ridiculously hammy. Maybe you say it's a nod to TOS, but it was over the top.
One is Undiscovered Country. Great actors. Great dialogue. A beautiful way to end the TOS characters' appearances. It had so much to say about our world socially as well as the state of the actors and the property itself. This felt most like a Star Trek movie to me.
If there is to be a brave, new world, our generation is going to have the hardest time living in it.
Perfect! Absolutely perfect.
posted by ruthsarian at 6:17 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
For a minute I couldn't remember if Abrams had already released one or two ST movies so I can't defend them as anything more than ephemera. But: visually they did a fantastic job of returning to and updating the 60's colorful space aesthetic. I'm a little tired of battleship greys in the infinite void.
posted by LarsC at 6:35 AM on June 16, 2016
posted by LarsC at 6:35 AM on June 16, 2016
By Grabthar's hammer... this list is incomplete.
posted by azpenguin at 6:36 AM on June 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
posted by azpenguin at 6:36 AM on June 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
Not gonna read this list because I have too many indefensible feels about Star Trek in all kinds of ways. Like I've actually watched STV more than once. Ugh, I know.
But a local geek coffeehouse is showing a bunch of eps from all 5 series and we were watching "Devil in the Dark" last night and I was noticing how much the JJAbrams films have, I don't know, clumsily macho'd the uniforms of TOS? Like, the boots. Look how dainty the boots are on the men in TOS. And their uniforms.
We can't have that anymore. It's like American culture has become more gendered as we have fumbled toward gender equality.
Ah, well. Too many feels.
posted by allthinky at 6:41 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
But a local geek coffeehouse is showing a bunch of eps from all 5 series and we were watching "Devil in the Dark" last night and I was noticing how much the JJAbrams films have, I don't know, clumsily macho'd the uniforms of TOS? Like, the boots. Look how dainty the boots are on the men in TOS. And their uniforms.
We can't have that anymore. It's like American culture has become more gendered as we have fumbled toward gender equality.
Ah, well. Too many feels.
posted by allthinky at 6:41 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I'm a little tired of battleship greys in the infinite void.
What, you don't like orange ultrasuede recreation rooms (ST:TMP) or beige conference rooms with salmon chairs (STTNG)?
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 6:54 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
What, you don't like orange ultrasuede recreation rooms (ST:TMP) or beige conference rooms with salmon chairs (STTNG)?
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 6:54 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Guys we were just talking about the boss nature of IV like a month ago
The same author recently reviewed VI and makes the case for why it's probably the best of the original six. I mean, he doesn't come out and say it, so I will:
Undiscovered Country is better than Wrath of Khan. Come at me.
posted by thecaddy at 6:55 AM on June 16, 2016
The same author recently reviewed VI and makes the case for why it's probably the best of the original six. I mean, he doesn't come out and say it, so I will:
Undiscovered Country is better than Wrath of Khan. Come at me.
posted by thecaddy at 6:55 AM on June 16, 2016
12. Star Trek Into Darkness
11. Star Trek Nemesis
10. Star Trek: The Motion Picture
9.Star Trek V: The Final Frontier Star Trek: Insurrection
8.Star Trek: Insurrection Star Trek V: The Final Frontier
7.Star Trek: Generations Star Trek (2009)
6.Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country Star Trek: Generations
5. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock
4.Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
3.Star Trek (2009) Star Trek: First Contact
2.Star Trek: First Contact Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
1. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
FTFY
posted by duffell at 7:01 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
11. Star Trek Nemesis
10. Star Trek: The Motion Picture
9.
8.
7.
6.
5. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock
4.
3.
2.
1. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
FTFY
posted by duffell at 7:01 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
For me Insurrection and Nemesis are like those bland Magic the Gathering sets from 2000 to 2002 that were put out while I wasn't paying attention and don't really know or care anything about even though I've have seen them.
posted by charred husk at 7:12 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by charred husk at 7:12 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
Insurrection: "Earth tones, people, earth tones! Browns and beige and mother of pearl"
posted by zippy at 7:13 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by zippy at 7:13 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
WHATEVER ONE WHERE DATA SAYS LOCK N LOAD is #1 obvs.
posted by stevil at 7:20 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by stevil at 7:20 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
I also am underwhelmed by the whale film. Its only saving graces are transparent aluminum and the emergence of 'nuclear wessels' as a meme.
I am likewise underwhelmed but I would add Chekov's line about the nuclear wessel he locates: "And Keptin, it is the Enterprise." What's not to like?
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:26 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
I am likewise underwhelmed but I would add Chekov's line about the nuclear wessel he locates: "And Keptin, it is the Enterprise." What's not to like?
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:26 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
- Wrath of Khan
- Voyage Home
- Undiscovered Country
- First Contact
- The Motion Picture
After this point, the ordering is less interesting, because all the movies are pretty bad. - Search for Spock
- Insurrection
- Generations
- Final Frontier
- Nemesis
posted by adamrice at 7:40 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
The opening to Star Trek Enterprise's episode "In a Mirror Darkly" provided a much more fun alternative to one of the final scenes of ST: First Contact.
posted by zarq at 7:44 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by zarq at 7:44 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
I just rewatched First Contact and it is both better and worse than I remembered.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 7:46 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by the man of twists and turns at 7:46 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
After this point, the ordering is less interesting, because all the movies are pretty bad.
6. Search for Spock
"Are you just gonna walk through them?!"
posted by zarq at 7:49 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
6. Search for Spock
"Are you just gonna walk through them?!"
posted by zarq at 7:49 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
My list:
1. The movies with chemistry and a great script
2. The Motion Picture
3. Two-parter TNG episodes
4. Shatner in the director's chair
posted by zippy at 7:49 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
1. The movies with chemistry and a great script
2. The Motion Picture
3. Two-parter TNG episodes
4. Shatner in the director's chair
posted by zippy at 7:49 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
1. The even-numbered Trek movies with TWOK first
2. The odd-numbered Trek movies with SFS last (Seriously, why does God need a starship?)
The TMP Enterprise was the best Enterprise ever though. Even better than CV-6.
posted by Rob Rockets at 7:55 AM on June 16, 2016
2. The odd-numbered Trek movies with SFS last (Seriously, why does God need a starship?)
The TMP Enterprise was the best Enterprise ever though. Even better than CV-6.
posted by Rob Rockets at 7:55 AM on June 16, 2016
I'd put Insurrection below most fan films.
posted by cmfletcher at 8:00 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by cmfletcher at 8:00 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
1. Movies with "white whales"
2. Movies with actual whales
3. Movies with zero whales
posted by enjoymoreradio at 8:13 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
2. Movies with actual whales
3. Movies with zero whales
posted by enjoymoreradio at 8:13 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
zarq—I had forgotten that awful FutureFauntloroy suit they put Chekhov in. That alone might be enough to downgrade Search for Spock.
posted by adamrice at 8:13 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by adamrice at 8:13 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Wrath of Khan is, just ok, but it does not hold up that well as an action movie and not as interesting from an explores culture/alienness/philosophy angle as much of the better trek.
Wrath of Khan is not an action movie. The better title for it is Star Trek II: Kirk's Midlife Crisis. The film is about Kirk and his past decisions and actions coming back on him; about him losing his best friend; about him facing mortality and death and discovering how to respond to them.
Trek went out to explore alien cultures and philosophy, but the point always was that the alien cultures being encountered were us; some aspect of humanity taken to an extreme end, with a different forehead or ears, but recognizable. Star Trek: TMP caught that sense of confronting the unknown and discovering it was us; the old series movies from that point took a bit of a different angle in that what the crew is confronting is usually more internally, character focused - there's a focus on Kirk in both II & III; V - for all the tremendous, gaping, huge flaws - gives a lot of moments for the core three of Kirk, Spock, and McCoy to explore their humanity. VI again goes back to Kirk largely, though I feel there is a Spock piece there as well that might have been sharpened if the character of Valeris had been that of Saavik, which I think was the original intent.
IV is a fantastic romp that gives every character a moment to shine, and is wonderful in that it gives us a Star Trek experience that doesn't end with a large action piece or combat, but focuses on the characters using their skills and knowledge and both science-ing the shit out of the situation as well as Kirk being his charming best. But what I love the most about it is perhaps the fact that is probably the most direct commentary on the fact that Star Trek at its best is about exploring what being human is; the "strange new world" being sought out is the world the audience is sitting in at that moment, and the clash of civilizations is the source of not only great amusement but commentary on us, our natures, our reality versus a vision of a better future.
I won't comment on the Next Gen movies, as they really seem to mark the franchise truly moving towards being action-adventure in space, which always surprises me considering that TNG the show was more about committee meetings than blowing shit up.
posted by nubs at 8:26 AM on June 16, 2016 [9 favorites]
Wrath of Khan is not an action movie. The better title for it is Star Trek II: Kirk's Midlife Crisis. The film is about Kirk and his past decisions and actions coming back on him; about him losing his best friend; about him facing mortality and death and discovering how to respond to them.
Trek went out to explore alien cultures and philosophy, but the point always was that the alien cultures being encountered were us; some aspect of humanity taken to an extreme end, with a different forehead or ears, but recognizable. Star Trek: TMP caught that sense of confronting the unknown and discovering it was us; the old series movies from that point took a bit of a different angle in that what the crew is confronting is usually more internally, character focused - there's a focus on Kirk in both II & III; V - for all the tremendous, gaping, huge flaws - gives a lot of moments for the core three of Kirk, Spock, and McCoy to explore their humanity. VI again goes back to Kirk largely, though I feel there is a Spock piece there as well that might have been sharpened if the character of Valeris had been that of Saavik, which I think was the original intent.
IV is a fantastic romp that gives every character a moment to shine, and is wonderful in that it gives us a Star Trek experience that doesn't end with a large action piece or combat, but focuses on the characters using their skills and knowledge and both science-ing the shit out of the situation as well as Kirk being his charming best. But what I love the most about it is perhaps the fact that is probably the most direct commentary on the fact that Star Trek at its best is about exploring what being human is; the "strange new world" being sought out is the world the audience is sitting in at that moment, and the clash of civilizations is the source of not only great amusement but commentary on us, our natures, our reality versus a vision of a better future.
I won't comment on the Next Gen movies, as they really seem to mark the franchise truly moving towards being action-adventure in space, which always surprises me considering that TNG the show was more about committee meetings than blowing shit up.
posted by nubs at 8:26 AM on June 16, 2016 [9 favorites]
I still love the crazy whale movie. To this day I'm surprised they made it. And oh, how delightful the boom box, Spock in his crazy outfit, wessels, whales, etc. were.
posted by jenfullmoon at 8:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by jenfullmoon at 8:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
#1 The Voyage Home
#2 The Motion Picture
#3 The Wrath of Khan
#4 The Search for Spock
#5 The Final Frontier
#6 The Undiscovered Country
......everything else.
posted by ELF Radio at 8:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
#2 The Motion Picture
#3 The Wrath of Khan
#4 The Search for Spock
#5 The Final Frontier
#6 The Undiscovered Country
......everything else.
posted by ELF Radio at 8:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
TMP was my favorite of the bunch for a very long time. When I was young, I found those interminably long vistas of V'GER's digestive tract awe-inspiring. Best screensaver ever. Even as I got older, I was pleased by the contemplative nature of the near-wordless sightseeing portions, somewhat reminiscent of other (better) 70's films like Silent Running and Solaris, and diametrically opposed to the noise and fast paced action of Star Wars and its spiritual descendants.
But I recently rewatched it, and was mortified at how badly the effects had aged.
Even Persis Khambatta didn't do it for me like before. And I suppose it's not fair to judge 1979 Stephen Collins by the creeper he'd later become but his recentish behavior casts an inevitable pall over his old work.
posted by xigxag at 8:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
But I recently rewatched it, and was mortified at how badly the effects had aged.
Even Persis Khambatta didn't do it for me like before. And I suppose it's not fair to judge 1979 Stephen Collins by the creeper he'd later become but his recentish behavior casts an inevitable pall over his old work.
posted by xigxag at 8:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Five: The Voyage Home. The whole 'save the whales' thing is classic Trek philosophy, and Nimoy made sure all the characters got their chance to shine. It was fun and entertaining as all get-out, but this was also the Trek movie that went out of its way to be accessible to non-fans, and honestly, I've never cared for that aspect of it. Ordinary people always screw up things meant for nerds.
posted by KHAAAN! at 8:02 AM on June 16
Well, yes, it did that a little -- but (A) it's a time-travel story, so they were GONNA add a ton of fish-out-of-water humor, which will always feel a bit "pop," won't it? And (B) in a significant way, TVH is actually the most hostile to non-nerds: it's the final chapter of the Genesis arc, and anybody who skipped II and III would be kinda lost for the first ~45 minutes and wouldn't care much about the last ~20. In fact, IIRC I read somewhere that one of the big complaints about IV, mainly from the non-nerds, was that the Enterprise was barely in it.
Anecdotally, I also remember a lot of boys my age deriding IV as the "SAVE THE WHALES" movie, well into adulthood in fact. So for all its pop sensibility, to whatever extent one thinks it was deliberate, you have to credit IV for maintaining quite a lot of Trek-ness. Certainly far more than He Who Shall Not Be Named managed to maintain in his audiovisual excrescences that some people refer to as films.
Undiscovered Country is better than Wrath of Khan. Come at me.
posted by thecaddy at 8:55 AM on June 16
*steeples fingers* Hmm. I think I see why you say that. It's faster-paced, it's more fun, it's got more STUFF, the emotional resonance of its finale is less drained by its arguably-unnecessary follow-up (Generations) than TWOK's finale was by its arguably-unnecessary follow-up (III). TUC also feels more Trek-y to me, but that may be my TNG-era bias talking. TWOK feels more like it's trying to be a real film. Whether it's better as a film (irrespective of Trek-ness) is probably dependent on one's tolerance for the slower pace of early '80s cinema, but I have to take issue inasmuch as TUC is so clearly franchisey, even a bit fanservicey, that TWOK is better from a film snob perspective if nothing else. Tough call.
posted by CheesesOfBrazil at 8:33 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by KHAAAN! at 8:02 AM on June 16
Well, yes, it did that a little -- but (A) it's a time-travel story, so they were GONNA add a ton of fish-out-of-water humor, which will always feel a bit "pop," won't it? And (B) in a significant way, TVH is actually the most hostile to non-nerds: it's the final chapter of the Genesis arc, and anybody who skipped II and III would be kinda lost for the first ~45 minutes and wouldn't care much about the last ~20. In fact, IIRC I read somewhere that one of the big complaints about IV, mainly from the non-nerds, was that the Enterprise was barely in it.
Anecdotally, I also remember a lot of boys my age deriding IV as the "SAVE THE WHALES" movie, well into adulthood in fact. So for all its pop sensibility, to whatever extent one thinks it was deliberate, you have to credit IV for maintaining quite a lot of Trek-ness. Certainly far more than He Who Shall Not Be Named managed to maintain in his audiovisual excrescences that some people refer to as films.
Undiscovered Country is better than Wrath of Khan. Come at me.
posted by thecaddy at 8:55 AM on June 16
*steeples fingers* Hmm. I think I see why you say that. It's faster-paced, it's more fun, it's got more STUFF, the emotional resonance of its finale is less drained by its arguably-unnecessary follow-up (Generations) than TWOK's finale was by its arguably-unnecessary follow-up (III). TUC also feels more Trek-y to me, but that may be my TNG-era bias talking. TWOK feels more like it's trying to be a real film. Whether it's better as a film (irrespective of Trek-ness) is probably dependent on one's tolerance for the slower pace of early '80s cinema, but I have to take issue inasmuch as TUC is so clearly franchisey, even a bit fanservicey, that TWOK is better from a film snob perspective if nothing else. Tough call.
posted by CheesesOfBrazil at 8:33 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Enterprise also ran an alternative timeline episode called "Twilight", which showed humans finding refuge in the Ceti Alpha system after Earth had been destroyed by the Xindi. Only 6000 people remain of the entire human race and they're all living on Ceti Alpha V.
I had chills when they mentioned the planet's name. A nice shout-out to Trek fans, who would have an added sense of "Yeah, they're completely fucked" at the connection.
posted by zarq at 8:46 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
I had chills when they mentioned the planet's name. A nice shout-out to Trek fans, who would have an added sense of "Yeah, they're completely fucked" at the connection.
posted by zarq at 8:46 AM on June 16, 2016 [6 favorites]
That's awesome, zarq. I dipped in and out of the Xindi storyline on Enterprise and never caught that episode, but that is a brilliant touch.
posted by nubs at 8:48 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by nubs at 8:48 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
If I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do this...
12. Trek Into Darkness
- Ugh, I was really hoping that after they introduced the reboot they would not spend all their time haphazardly referencing the original timeline. Just a jumble of scenes and callbacks.
11. Insurrection
- I'm still not sure why the magical healing planet could only be used by the handful of people who happened to live there. Couldn't they open a clinic or something?
10. Nemesis
- All the TNG movies struggle with the need to have everyone do something, but this one just collapses. Also, the premise is dumb.
9. Voyage Home
- This is the opposite of what I want out of a Star Trek movie, but at least it is competently made.
8. Generations
- Not that great, but its got the Enterprise-B, and Shatner and McDowell.
7. Search for Spock
- I love the beginning of this movie up until they steal the Enterprise. Everything after that is an undifferentiated murky blur.
6. Final Frontier
- I honestly don't know why people hate on this movie. I know it is inconsistent in the character details, but the overall plot and flow seems very TOS Trek to me. More than most of the films.
5. Undiscovered Country
- This is a good follow-up to Khan's themes about aging. The ice planet prison stuff drags a bit.
4. Trek 2009
- I like the new versions of these characters so much that I forgive an otherwise flawed movie.
3. First Contact
- A great, tight, exciting action movie. Patrick Stewart chews scenery.
2. The Motion Picture
- I have a well-documented affection for long, slow sci-fi movies. This isn't exactly "Solaris" but it is still pretty cool.
1. Wrath of Khan
- Kirk has to deal with the loss of his youth at the same time as he faces the consequences of his youthful actions. Montalban is amazing to watch. This movie is very different from what came before, but it is so well-constructed that it completely changed the franchise.
posted by He Is Only The Imposter at 8:50 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
12. Trek Into Darkness
- Ugh, I was really hoping that after they introduced the reboot they would not spend all their time haphazardly referencing the original timeline. Just a jumble of scenes and callbacks.
11. Insurrection
- I'm still not sure why the magical healing planet could only be used by the handful of people who happened to live there. Couldn't they open a clinic or something?
10. Nemesis
- All the TNG movies struggle with the need to have everyone do something, but this one just collapses. Also, the premise is dumb.
9. Voyage Home
- This is the opposite of what I want out of a Star Trek movie, but at least it is competently made.
8. Generations
- Not that great, but its got the Enterprise-B, and Shatner and McDowell.
7. Search for Spock
- I love the beginning of this movie up until they steal the Enterprise. Everything after that is an undifferentiated murky blur.
6. Final Frontier
- I honestly don't know why people hate on this movie. I know it is inconsistent in the character details, but the overall plot and flow seems very TOS Trek to me. More than most of the films.
5. Undiscovered Country
- This is a good follow-up to Khan's themes about aging. The ice planet prison stuff drags a bit.
4. Trek 2009
- I like the new versions of these characters so much that I forgive an otherwise flawed movie.
3. First Contact
- A great, tight, exciting action movie. Patrick Stewart chews scenery.
2. The Motion Picture
- I have a well-documented affection for long, slow sci-fi movies. This isn't exactly "Solaris" but it is still pretty cool.
1. Wrath of Khan
- Kirk has to deal with the loss of his youth at the same time as he faces the consequences of his youthful actions. Montalban is amazing to watch. This movie is very different from what came before, but it is so well-constructed that it completely changed the franchise.
posted by He Is Only The Imposter at 8:50 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Well I don't agree with any of you!
posted by mazola at 8:53 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by mazola at 8:53 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Well I don't agree with any of you!
IDIC, my friend. We don't have to agree to coexist.
posted by nubs at 8:55 AM on June 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
IDIC, my friend. We don't have to agree to coexist.
posted by nubs at 8:55 AM on June 16, 2016 [7 favorites]
I'm going to try watching them in alphabetical order.
posted by ZeusHumms at 8:57 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by ZeusHumms at 8:57 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
We don't have to agree to coexist.
Well that's good news as I don't agree to us coexisting.
posted by biffa at 9:05 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Well that's good news as I don't agree to us coexisting.
posted by biffa at 9:05 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Well that's good news as I don't agree to us coexisting.
The line must be drawn here!
posted by nubs at 9:10 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
The line must be drawn here!
posted by nubs at 9:10 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
_____________________________________________________________________________
posted by mazola at 9:12 AM on June 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
posted by mazola at 9:12 AM on June 16, 2016 [12 favorites]
One of my goals in life is to change popular opinion on First Contact because it is a pretty goddamn shitty movie. I think people rate it so highly because it's far and away the best TNG movie, but that's like saying that skin cancer is good because it's the best cancer, or something.
The Abramsverse Trek movies will be viewed as a weird side tangent/dead end.
Trek has never translated well to movies, but I think all of the TOS movies are better than the TNG movies, because TOS had a core (Kirk, Spock, McCoy) group of characters to hang the plot on. TNG movies try to serve too many masters and therefore end up doing all of them badly.
posted by Automocar at 9:14 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
The Abramsverse Trek movies will be viewed as a weird side tangent/dead end.
Trek has never translated well to movies, but I think all of the TOS movies are better than the TNG movies, because TOS had a core (Kirk, Spock, McCoy) group of characters to hang the plot on. TNG movies try to serve too many masters and therefore end up doing all of them badly.
posted by Automocar at 9:14 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
One of my goals in life is to change popular opinion on First Contact because it is a pretty goddamn shitty movie
I agree. My youngest son has become very interested in Trek all of a sudden, and last week I sat down to watch some with him, only to discover that Netflix Canada has apparently lost the streaming rights to both the Original Series and TNG. The movies they had left were - Generations, First Contact, Insurrection, and Nemesis. He's already seen II and III, which I have on DVD, and IV wasn't of interest to him (yet).
We went with First Contact and I'm desperate now to find DVDs of the Original Series or the TNG series to correct his perceptions of what Trek is about.
posted by nubs at 9:23 AM on June 16, 2016
I agree. My youngest son has become very interested in Trek all of a sudden, and last week I sat down to watch some with him, only to discover that Netflix Canada has apparently lost the streaming rights to both the Original Series and TNG. The movies they had left were - Generations, First Contact, Insurrection, and Nemesis. He's already seen II and III, which I have on DVD, and IV wasn't of interest to him (yet).
We went with First Contact and I'm desperate now to find DVDs of the Original Series or the TNG series to correct his perceptions of what Trek is about.
posted by nubs at 9:23 AM on June 16, 2016
What we're ignoring here is the fact that Horner's score for Khan is available on Spotify and is without peer as a Gettin' Shit Done soundtrack, be it cooking, cartooning, or office work.
posted by the phlegmatic king at 9:24 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by the phlegmatic king at 9:24 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
What we're ignoring here is the fact that Horner's score for Khan is available on Spotify and is without peer as a Gettin' Shit Done soundtrack, be it cooking, cartooning, or office work.
Well shit, I know what I'm listening to today as I write database queries
posted by Automocar at 9:26 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Well shit, I know what I'm listening to today as I write database queries
posted by Automocar at 9:26 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
He tasks me!
posted by Artw at 9:28 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by Artw at 9:28 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
The only thing I remember about Star Trek: Insurrection is that I've always called it Star Trek: Ivegotanerection because I am stuck at 12.
I don't even know if I've seen it or not.
posted by kirkaracha at 9:39 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
I don't even know if I've seen it or not.
posted by kirkaracha at 9:39 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
Star Trek: Ivegotanerection
Red Letter Media: That'll be the next movie … (NSFW)
posted by zippy at 10:02 AM on June 16, 2016
Red Letter Media: That'll be the next movie … (NSFW)
posted by zippy at 10:02 AM on June 16, 2016
I actually don't remember if I've seen Insurrection or Nemesis all the way through or just parts or just one and not the other.
posted by octothorpe at 10:05 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by octothorpe at 10:05 AM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Nemesis is the one where the captain is menaced by a figure from his past and they have to fight a starship duel and it goes badly and only the sacrifice of the beloved logic-oriented fish-out-of-water crew member can save the ship.
But it's okay because the logical crew member has a backup of sorts.
posted by Sauce Trough at 10:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
But it's okay because the logical crew member has a backup of sorts.
posted by Sauce Trough at 10:30 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Nemesis is the one where the captain is menaced by a figure from his past and they have to fight a starship duel and it goes badly and only the sacrifice of the beloved logic-oriented fish-out-of-water crew member can save the ship.
Plus dune buggies.
posted by nubs at 10:36 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Plus dune buggies.
posted by nubs at 10:36 AM on June 16, 2016 [2 favorites]
Plus no understanding of what "clone" means.
posted by Artw at 10:42 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Artw at 10:42 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Nemesis was so forgettable that I actually saw it in the theater *twice*, and it was 20 minutes in to the second viewing that I finally, vaguely, recalled seeing it previously.
Note that I am such a Trek fan that I stayed and watched it again, because Trek.
posted by brand-gnu at 10:52 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
Note that I am such a Trek fan that I stayed and watched it again, because Trek.
posted by brand-gnu at 10:52 AM on June 16, 2016 [3 favorites]
Plus dune buggies.
MY TIRES ARE FILLED WITH WATER.
posted by CheesesOfBrazil at 11:33 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
MY TIRES ARE FILLED WITH WATER.
posted by CheesesOfBrazil at 11:33 AM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Nemesis pulled off the remarkable (as in remarkably buttheaded) trick of giving Ron Perlman such a forgettable, superfluous character that you had no idea that it was Ron Perlman, even through makeup. The only Trek character that Ron Perlman should play is a Klingon who's so badass that he defeats enemy starships by punching them.
posted by Halloween Jack at 12:14 PM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by Halloween Jack at 12:14 PM on June 16, 2016 [4 favorites]
Fingers crossed no repetition with Idris Elba.
posted by Artw at 12:21 PM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Artw at 12:21 PM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
Holy fuck, Ron Perlman was in Nemesis? Really? I've seen it three times, love Perlman, and had no idea.
posted by zippy at 1:51 PM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by zippy at 1:51 PM on June 16, 2016 [1 favorite]
I honestly just went through the whole thread and favorited the comments that mention Galaxy Quest, which I think sums up my feelings about Star Trek movies. Now I wanna go watch some DS9, though.
posted by nonasuch at 5:08 PM on June 16, 2016
posted by nonasuch at 5:08 PM on June 16, 2016
The great thing about this ranking argument is that there are 12!=479001600 possible opinions to be had. (Or 3628800 or 6227020800, depending who you ask.)
That being said, Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home is objectively the best Star Trek movie.
posted by brecc at 10:24 PM on June 16, 2016
That being said, Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home is objectively the best Star Trek movie.
posted by brecc at 10:24 PM on June 16, 2016
12. Nemesis -- It's the only one I've skipped watching in the theaters as a teen or adult, and when I finally saw it, I didn't regret that fact.
11. Trek Into Darkness -- Not very good fan fiction, but an okay summer popcorn movie.
10. Insurrection -- Disappointing, but I felt it had affection for the characters and some weirdly awkward humor.
9. Star Trek 2009 -- This fan fic movie had a pretty strong opening scene, and some nice Leonard Nimoy bits.
8. Generations -- Ignoble end for the D, and Kirk's wasn't so great either (his first presumed death on the B was better, even), not to mention Picard's nephew. Still, the Kirk/Picard scenes were good.
7. Final Frontier -- I actually read the novelization of this one before seeing it in the movie theaters, which made me enjoy it more than I might have otherwise (like, there was this whole minor subplot in the book about McCoy changing the library computer's entries on marshmellows, which made the camping scenes make a lot more sense).
6. First Contact -- The TNG crew had a proper action-filled movie, which wasn't very TNG-like, but it was still enjoyable and it featured some proper Picard monologues.
5. Search for Spock -- Christopher Lloyd was a fun Klingon, and the loss of the true Enterprise (NCC one seven O one. No bloody A, B, C, or D) was poignant. It did feature the lesser version of Saavik.
5. The Motion Picture -- Felt like TOS Trek done big. Maybe the effects holds up, maybe they don't, but the refit Enterprise model is beautiful.
3. Undiscovered Country -- A nice send off for the original cast, what with them flying directly into the sun at the end. Plus some Shakespeare, some Klingons, some heroics in the name of preserving peace.
2. The Voyage Home -- There was nothing that wasn't fun about this, and pretty much every character had some moments to shine. Plus we meet the A at the end, without any hint that it would end up being a bit of a lemon.
1. Wrath of Khan -- Best villain, best Saavik, great character moments, great pacing.
posted by Pryde at 11:01 PM on June 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
11. Trek Into Darkness -- Not very good fan fiction, but an okay summer popcorn movie.
10. Insurrection -- Disappointing, but I felt it had affection for the characters and some weirdly awkward humor.
9. Star Trek 2009 -- This fan fic movie had a pretty strong opening scene, and some nice Leonard Nimoy bits.
8. Generations -- Ignoble end for the D, and Kirk's wasn't so great either (his first presumed death on the B was better, even), not to mention Picard's nephew. Still, the Kirk/Picard scenes were good.
7. Final Frontier -- I actually read the novelization of this one before seeing it in the movie theaters, which made me enjoy it more than I might have otherwise (like, there was this whole minor subplot in the book about McCoy changing the library computer's entries on marshmellows, which made the camping scenes make a lot more sense).
6. First Contact -- The TNG crew had a proper action-filled movie, which wasn't very TNG-like, but it was still enjoyable and it featured some proper Picard monologues.
5. Search for Spock -- Christopher Lloyd was a fun Klingon, and the loss of the true Enterprise (NCC one seven O one. No bloody A, B, C, or D) was poignant. It did feature the lesser version of Saavik.
5. The Motion Picture -- Felt like TOS Trek done big. Maybe the effects holds up, maybe they don't, but the refit Enterprise model is beautiful.
3. Undiscovered Country -- A nice send off for the original cast, what with them flying directly into the sun at the end. Plus some Shakespeare, some Klingons, some heroics in the name of preserving peace.
2. The Voyage Home -- There was nothing that wasn't fun about this, and pretty much every character had some moments to shine. Plus we meet the A at the end, without any hint that it would end up being a bit of a lemon.
1. Wrath of Khan -- Best villain, best Saavik, great character moments, great pacing.
posted by Pryde at 11:01 PM on June 16, 2016 [5 favorites]
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TMP should be way higher also. Certainly not bottom 3. Sure it was a bit slow, but it still had a lot of good ST stuff.
posted by biffa at 11:56 PM on June 15, 2016 [7 favorites]