12/10 h*ckin good story
January 5, 2017 9:07 AM   Subscribe

 
@dog_rates pretty much got me through that shitty year. 13/10.
posted by gwint at 9:11 AM on January 5, 2017 [31 favorites]


What killed it was WeRateDogs refusal to use Brant's real name, which is consistent with their general ethos of identifying dogs as something else and identifying something else as dogs.

They have a whole thing going that manages to sweet and hilarious at the same time.
posted by maxsparber at 9:11 AM on January 5, 2017 [36 favorites]


“I had followed Matt’s account for a while. I think I even submitted a dog awhile ago. He never rated it,” Walker explained.

Ah ha!

“I don’t want to say that the fact that I’d sent a dog to him and he didn’t respond was my motivation.”

Oh.
posted by ODiV at 9:12 AM on January 5, 2017 [2 favorites]


Memes, schmemes. I only care about whether or not Kenneth is ever getting out of that bubble.
posted by Atom Eyes at 9:17 AM on January 5, 2017 [22 favorites]


AS SOON AS HE FINDS THE RIGHT FREQUENCY
posted by quonsar II: smock fishpants and the temple of foon at 9:20 AM on January 5, 2017 [31 favorites]


Nigel Tufnel approves of this rating system.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 9:21 AM on January 5, 2017 [1 favorite]


This is a pretty good troll. I'd rate it a 5/7. Perfection.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:24 AM on January 5, 2017 [5 favorites]


it's a good meme Brent
posted by entropicamericana at 9:32 AM on January 5, 2017 [23 favorites]


I would kill for Pipsy.
posted by a fiendish thingy at 9:43 AM on January 5, 2017 [3 favorites]


Add me to the list: dog memes got me through 2016.
I don't do twitter but I am on facebook, and can recommend Cool Doggo Memes, Doggo, Heckin Pictures of DANG Doggos, and Bork Bork You Are Doing Me A Frighten as heckin decent pages to follow.
posted by phunniemee at 9:43 AM on January 5, 2017 [11 favorites]


@dog_rates is the best. I wonder how mad people get if their dog is only rated a 10 or 11.
posted by bondcliff at 9:51 AM on January 5, 2017 [1 favorite]


Such bullshit. Troll gets called out for being a troll and responds with "who, moi??" (Bront, I mean)
posted by danny the boy at 9:52 AM on January 5, 2017


someone call up Dog, and see what he thinks
posted by thelonius at 9:53 AM on January 5, 2017 [6 favorites]


hello this is dog
posted by murphy slaw at 9:54 AM on January 5, 2017 [24 favorites]


i love these puppers but the best meme of 2016 was bode
posted by poffin boffin at 9:55 AM on January 5, 2017 [2 favorites]


much answer
       hello

this doge         yes!!!

     phone?
        phone?!?!

omg.
posted by maryr at 9:56 AM on January 5, 2017 [6 favorites]


also there is an animalrates tumblr that is not the same person as the twitter guy, the tumbls person is a content thief, i dislike them and wish them ill
posted by poffin boffin at 9:57 AM on January 5, 2017


They're good bronts, dog
posted by Jugwine at 9:58 AM on January 5, 2017 [24 favorites]


The best meme of 2016 is "We Are Number One but". Hands down.
posted by I-baLL at 10:01 AM on January 5, 2017


H*ckin fantastic post.
posted by praemunire at 10:01 AM on January 5, 2017 [1 favorite]


I do not care for the snip snap doggos only the woof bork ones.
posted by cmfletcher at 10:03 AM on January 5, 2017 [3 favorites]


just think of how good twitter would be if it was only doggos and no people
posted by murphy slaw at 10:04 AM on January 5, 2017 [10 favorites]


Just please for the love of dog stop calling them "puppers".
posted by Brocktoon at 10:05 AM on January 5, 2017 [6 favorites]


omg the wedding cake
posted by sunset in snow country at 10:06 AM on January 5, 2017


Just please for the love of dog stop calling them "puppers".
posted by Brocktoon


No can do Bracktune
posted by a fiendish thingy at 10:07 AM on January 5, 2017 [113 favorites]


Just please for the love of dog stop calling them "puppers".

ALL DOGS ARE PUPPER.
posted by maxsparber at 10:08 AM on January 5, 2017 [14 favorites]


oh wow
much fantastic
so h*ckin
many doggos
posted by entropicamericana at 10:10 AM on January 5, 2017


H*ckin fantastic post.

They're all good posts, prenumier
posted by qcubed at 10:13 AM on January 5, 2017 [5 favorites]


Just please for the love of dog stop calling them "puppers".

they're good puppers, breck
posted by poffin boffin at 10:17 AM on January 5, 2017 [27 favorites]




This is perfect. News headlines causing me blind rage today not even kidding. Shutting all tabs except the one with good dogs.
posted by dnash at 10:18 AM on January 5, 2017


Why are you so mad brickton?
posted by cmfletcher at 10:18 AM on January 5, 2017 [5 favorites]


Just please for the love of dog stop calling them "puppers".

can we get guitar people to stop calling pickups "pups", too?
posted by thelonius at 10:18 AM on January 5, 2017 [4 favorites]


I have corresponded with the dog_rates gentleman! I wanted to get my dad a t-shirt reading "Any dog can be a guide dog if you don't care where you're going" and he wrote back to ask "are you a wizard?" because the dog_rates shop was opening the next day and they sold that shirt and I gave it to my dad for his birthday and he wears it all the time!

I'm desperate for the dog_rates shop to start selling onesies but it doesn't seem like they are planning to do so which is a damn h*cking shame. #theyregoodbabiesBrent
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 10:25 AM on January 5, 2017 [39 favorites]


My fave things about @dog_rates is actually the occasional tweet-war with which every goat Twitter account it is.
posted by maryr at 10:26 AM on January 5, 2017 [5 favorites]


This guy also got into a scrap over Christmas with Heather Armstrong aka Dooce for the unauthorized use of a photo of her late dog Chuck as his avatar.
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 10:27 AM on January 5, 2017


My fave things about @dog_rates is actually the occasional tweet-war with which every goat Twitter account it is.

My husband is, appallingly, pro-goat (puppers4lyfe) and I absolutely will not abide them so whenever I sing "Hush Little Baby" to the kraken I sing most of the verses with "Mommy's going to buy you a..." but for the goat verse I change it to "Daddy's going to buy you a billy goat" so she grows up knowing that her father is just the worst.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 10:30 AM on January 5, 2017 [14 favorites]


It's a good meme, Brink, but my current love is Twitter's #CatsJudgingKellyanne
posted by billiebee at 10:30 AM on January 5, 2017 [1 favorite]


If MetaFilter was Twitter, everyone would still be talking about how "we have cameras" was the best exchange of all time.
posted by yhbc at 10:31 AM on January 5, 2017 [7 favorites]


I think dogs should vote.
posted by kmz at 10:37 AM on January 5, 2017 [3 favorites]


I can also highly recommend /r/woof_irl, which seems to be largely dogs in some form of awkward existential crisis...or humans in some form of awkward, existential crisis imposing their issues on pictures of dogs.

Either way, it's my daily dose of surreal happy.
posted by sektah at 10:39 AM on January 5, 2017 [4 favorites]


Yes, but what does this have to do with snek and birb? Heck if I know.
posted by Quindar Beep at 10:46 AM on January 5, 2017 [3 favorites]


Big probs to dog memes for adding minced oaths back into my vocabulary. I'd been going down a dark path for a while, but use of the word "heckin'" has mellowed my game considerably.
posted by redsparkler at 10:49 AM on January 5, 2017 [8 favorites]


I think dogs should vote.

I know what's going on here.
posted by maxsparber at 10:49 AM on January 5, 2017 [2 favorites]


I'd been going down a dark path for a while, but use of the word "heckin'" has mellowed my game considerably.

Flagged as offensive. Please bowdlerize properly, there might be children present.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 10:51 AM on January 5, 2017 [9 favorites]


I love this meme and I especially love that it's "they're good dogs" and not "they're all good dogs" for reasons I can't put my finger on. Maybe because it's not a blanket statement about all dogs are good (which is arguably true but still leaves room for argument) (especially when they've been in your trash can while you were at work AGAIN), and more a calm, straightforward assertion that dammit, Brant, what more do you want, these dogs are good.

But if I had to pick best meme of the year, well, for the love of God, Montresor...
posted by Mchelly at 10:58 AM on January 5, 2017 [12 favorites]




Just please for the love of dog stop calling them "puppers".

*SINGING*

DOWN BY THE PUPHOUSE
EARLY IN THE MORNING
SEE THE LITTLE PUPPERDOODLES ALL IN A ROW
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 11:14 AM on January 5, 2017 [4 favorites]


I was dubious of this yesterday when I first heard it, but apparently "pupper" really does mean "tits" in Norwegian.
posted by Naberius at 11:17 AM on January 5, 2017 [2 favorites]


I'd been going down a dark path for a while, but use of the word "heckin'" has mellowed my game considerably.

See, whereas I'm fine with 'pupper' and 'doggo', I refuse to acknowledge the legitimacy of 'heckin' and will not stand for its becoming a part of everyday vernacular.
posted by Atom Eyes at 11:17 AM on January 5, 2017


in norway they say pupper and i think that's beautiful
posted by phunniemee at 11:21 AM on January 5, 2017


but for the goat verse I change it to "Daddy's going to buy you a billy goat" so she grows up knowing that her father is just the worst.

AND YET you steadfastly tell me I can't buy a goat, even if my increasingly strained hypotheticals where we don't live in an apartment and the future survival of the goat species is dependent on our actions. How can you say no? LOOK AT HIM.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 11:28 AM on January 5, 2017 [13 favorites]


LOOK AT HIM.

"File:Too much ramming.jpg"

(|__|)
ಠ_ಠ
posted by zombieflanders at 11:38 AM on January 5, 2017 [11 favorites]


I NEED MADAGASCAN BUTTERBOP AND I NEED IT NOW
posted by the return of the thin white sock at 12:08 PM on January 5, 2017 [2 favorites]


OH MY GOD!!
posted by Naberius at 12:12 PM on January 5, 2017 [1 favorite]


this is a good post, bobby.
posted by DigDoug at 12:14 PM on January 5, 2017




I almost ALMOST made an Ask question to find this video again. Fortunately, a friend (h*ckin good fren) on Facebook was able to point me back to it.
posted by supercres at 12:16 PM on January 5, 2017 [6 favorites]


I used the stock photo the Twitter account uses as an avatar several times in the videos I made when I was working for John Tesh. It's super cute, and it looks like its fur is incredibly soft (the dog, not John Tesh). 14/10.
posted by under_petticoat_rule at 12:17 PM on January 5, 2017


He's a good horse Brent WOW WHAT A HORSE

(Warning: Toy horse with surprisingly detailed genitalia.)
posted by maxsparber at 12:45 PM on January 5, 2017


can I just say that bork is my favorite onomatopoeia ? It always puts me in a fit of giggles. Everyone knows that neighborhood dog that goes BORK BORK BORK!
posted by INFJ at 12:48 PM on January 5, 2017 [7 favorites]


hello this is dog

That was dog, he says hello.
posted by wenestvedt at 1:25 PM on January 5, 2017 [5 favorites]


Hello.

Is it dog you're looking for?
posted by maryr at 1:33 PM on January 5, 2017 [7 favorites]


Primed and ready to bork
posted by hototogisu at 2:06 PM on January 5, 2017


Pupper vs. Doggo.

Also, h*ckin is a h*ckin great word. 12/10 would defend in the lexicon
posted by middleclasstool at 3:04 PM on January 5, 2017 [5 favorites]


Primed and ready to bork

In prison for borking
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 3:08 PM on January 5, 2017


(Warning: Toy horse with surprisingly detailed genitalia.)

Is it a Schleich figurine? Because Schleich toy animals, especially males, tend to be lovingly anatomically detailed to an amazing extent. EVEN THE UNICORNS.
posted by nicebookrack at 4:07 PM on January 5, 2017 [3 favorites]


I really and truly love @dog_rates. This article, on the other hand ...

"[A white man] said he has had to block only a couple of people after becoming an anti-dog meme villain, both times because people were using “the f word” at him. Otherwise, he has gained about 1,000 Twitter followers [...]"

You don't say.
posted by zebra at 4:19 PM on January 5, 2017 [3 favorites]


Wasn't there a weird back-and-forth over some dog-rating facebook sites with a schism over how high the ratings were?
posted by klangklangston at 9:03 PM on January 5, 2017


That was dog spotting, I believe. Totally different thing.
posted by maryr at 9:08 PM on January 5, 2017 [3 favorites]


snek has been more of a thing, heck it
posted by scruss at 10:37 PM on January 5, 2017


bork megapost
posted by poffin boffin at 11:30 PM on January 5, 2017


Retail nightmares podcast ( with the fab Alicia Tobin from Stop podcasting yoursel fame) introduced me to "puppo". Anything that gives you the feeling of petting dogs is a puppo. Every week they discuss it and usually include some damn cute puppos that are actually puppos. Plus Alicia just got a cute puppos Hank that I want to devour.

( The podcast covers all the horrors that happen when you've got a career in retail and is damn funny too)
posted by kanata at 11:46 PM on January 5, 2017 [1 favorite]


heck
posted by louche mustachio at 1:06 AM on January 6, 2017


this is a good post, matriod babby.
posted by EndsOfInvention at 3:06 AM on January 6, 2017 [2 favorites]


dogspotting, previously
posted by murphy slaw at 6:43 AM on January 6, 2017


I am having A Week (why, we are being moved by the army and they have lost track of our worldly goods, which are somewhere on the other side of the country on flooded train tracks, you say?!) and by god, this is exactly what I needed.

Please list me in your files as officially endorsing all of the following:
Pupper, doggo, heckin, SNEK, the birdsrightsactivist Twitter which has not been mentioned here but which nonetheless fits into this category, the fact of the dogs being good and the rating system used by dog_rates.
posted by pseudonymph at 5:26 PM on January 6, 2017 [3 favorites]


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