Switch it up
January 13, 2017 12:06 PM   Subscribe

 
Unfortunately most SNL videos are behind paywalls or geoblocked, but I'd like to add that the new Switch is also both a dessert topping and a floor wax.
posted by GuyZero at 12:08 PM on January 13, 2017 [10 favorites]


Breath of the Wild continues to look like everything I've ever wanted from an Elder Scrolls game.
posted by NMcCoy at 12:10 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


Still trying to get a second NES classic controller...
posted by jeffamaphone at 12:10 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


I am excited about this only because I'm excited about the new Legend of Zelda installment. But that is probably enough to get me to order one of these. I'm surprised Amazon is not one of the preorder vendors.
posted by agatha_magatha at 12:11 PM on January 13, 2017


Wow, Mario Kart just looks like it's been reskinned, save for Battle mode.
posted by My Dad at 12:13 PM on January 13, 2017


It's a floor wax! It's a dessert topping!
posted by Sing Or Swim at 12:14 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


*grabby hands for the new sonic game*

My boyfriend is a little cool on the switch because he bought a Wii U and feels he didn't get the best value out of his purchase. I can't say that I blame him, but I do trust Nintendo with handheld products. They know what they're doing when it comes to handheld gaming. The switch might be a 'home console" but it's still a handheld system in my eyes.
posted by INFJ at 12:15 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


I don't know if this can really be said to compete against xBone and PS4. I don't really see this as something people get instead of one of those other consoles but in addition to one of them or as a substitute because they're more expensive.

Asking if it can compete against the big consoles is like asking if the new Chevy Malibu can compete against the BMW 3-Series.
posted by VTX at 12:15 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


Do we know if the Switch is able to sync with legacy Wii remotes? Because I'd really like to be able to use my old steering wheel shells to play Mario Kart.
posted by Strange Interlude at 12:16 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


I am excited about this only because I'm excited about the new Legend of Zelda installment. But that is probably enough to get me to order one of these.

They're being pretty quiet about it, but it's also still coming out for the Wii U (scroll down), on the same release date. I don't think it makes much sense to get the Switch just for Zelda.
posted by NMcCoy at 12:16 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


I'm pretty meh about the launch lineup other than Zelda, and the £280 price is a touch higher than I'd have liked (thanks Brexit!). But I live in hope that we'll see some cool Professor Layton/Ace Attorney-style games, and the prospect of handheld games like Animal Crossing and Stardew Valley is almost too much to take!

So as a souped-up 3DS, this has potential in the long run - but as a console on par with the Playstations and XBoxes of the world, it does not.
posted by adrianhon at 12:19 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


Do we know if the Switch is able to sync with legacy Wii remotes?

No articles say yes, so I'm guessing the answer is no. The new controllers have some different features so it's likely they'll be targeting only the new controllers. But I could be wrong.
posted by GuyZero at 12:19 PM on January 13, 2017


Oh, and I loved Splatoon, so I have high hopes for it on the Switch. Such a welcoming game both to beginners and experts.
posted by adrianhon at 12:21 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


And the pre-orders appear to already be sold out at Target, Game Stop and Best Buy.
posted by agatha_magatha at 12:22 PM on January 13, 2017


The way it breaks apart makes the whole thing look flimsy to me, not to mention the likelihood of parts getting lost. Back in my day, video game systems were one solid piece, and the controllers were connected to the console by wires so you always knew where they were.
posted by Faint of Butt at 12:23 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


Do we know if the Switch is able to sync with legacy Wii remotes?

There's been no sign of it so far. Personally, I'm gonna be pretty irked if my Wii U Pro Controller doesn't pair with it, though. I don't think there's any good reason for it not to.
posted by NMcCoy at 12:23 PM on January 13, 2017


Seen on twitter earlier: "Nintendo can't even keep up with demand for the Classic. Why should I believe them about the Switch?"
posted by hippybear at 12:25 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


Back in my day

Chill out, we're getting off your lawn.
posted by cooker girl at 12:25 PM on January 13, 2017 [7 favorites]


This is not a criticism of this thread but I swear the talking points for Nintendo consoles have been the same since the N64:

- Third party support
- Online whaaaaa [GC forward]
- Not a primary console
- Interesting graphics, not more realistic graphics
- [insert favorite Nintendo mascot]
- Seems like it could be cool but we'll wait and see

Probably I'm missing some too.

This, like all other Nintendo consoles, will have about a dozen must play games and three or four interesting games. It will not be an entertainment workhorse, but something fun to have around. That's the niche it fills and that's OK by me.
posted by Tevin at 12:27 PM on January 13, 2017 [15 favorites]


ARMS
posted by poffin boffin at 12:29 PM on January 13, 2017 [6 favorites]


Asking if it can compete against the big consoles is like asking if the new Chevy Malibu can compete against the BMW 3-Series.

People have limited money and, more pressingly, limited HDMI ports. But as a portable perhaps this gets around the 4 HDMI input limitation.

This is not a criticism of this thread but I swear the talking points for Nintendo consoles have been the same since the N64

Yep. And the strategy is the same too - they're mostly selling very popular franchise titles that also happen to be exclusive to their own hardware platform. It's hard to tell if they're selling hardware or games or whether Nintendo even really looks at those two things are being separable.
posted by GuyZero at 12:32 PM on January 13, 2017


Seriously, SO seriously fuck Sonic The Hedgehog. Sega hasn't made a non-shit Sonic game since 1992. Reverting the graphics is a transparent attempt to invoke some kind of Old School credibility that they have long since chopped up for firewood. Even if the new offering is as good as Sonic was in 1992--which would surprise the hell out of me--it's not 1992 anymore. It's way too little and way too late.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 12:32 PM on January 13, 2017


This is not a criticism of this thread but I swear the talking points for Nintendo consoles have been the same since the N64

And Nintendo's strategy worked for them until it didn't (Wii U). I hope that this console is fun for the people who buy it.

Do we know if the Switch is able to sync with legacy Wii remotes? Because I'd really like to be able to use my old steering wheel shells to play Mario Kart.

They got you fam: Joy-Con Wheel (Set of 2)$14.99MSRP*

And if you've got the fancy steering wheels with the slots for Wiimotes, in this 3D Printing Age, I doubt it will be that difficult to obtain some kind of adapter/holder/thingy that fixes a Joy-Con into a WiiMote wheel (even if it has to stick out a little).
posted by sparklemotion at 12:35 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


I am excited about this only because I'm excited about the new Legend of Zelda installment.

Breath of the Wild will also be on the Wii U, so you don't need a Switch to play it.

I don't know if this can really be said to compete against xBone and PS4. I don't really see this as something people get instead of one of those other consoles but in addition to one of them or as a substitute because they're more expensive.

But they aren't more expensive. Xbox One and Playstation 4 are ~$300 right now, same price as the Switch.

All that said, Nintendo always has interesting hardware ideas, and it'll be fun to watch and see what they can do with this thing.
posted by jcreigh at 12:35 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


Nintendo makes consoles to sell Nintendo games. Selling consoles is only the means to sell more games.
posted by Tevin at 12:36 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


This seems like the worst of both worlds (handheld and console). You end up having to design games that can work on both, and end up doing neither well.

I play casual games on the iPad, do what little *serious* gaming I do on the desktop (not very much). I would love a new console system, but most my choice seem to be the same offering from a decade ago or complete gimmicks. This seems like a gimmick.
posted by cjorgensen at 12:38 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


Sonic Mania is basically an officially licensed fangame. That's not a bad thing! Look at Freedom Planet!

Also, a new Shin Megami Tensei but no one knows what it is and maybe a new No More Heroes but no one knows what it is. And Dragon Quest XI continues to be drool-worthy. The (naturally, confusingly-titled) Xenoblade 2 is the biggest surprise; it looks even shonen-y-er than the previous two, but the world will still be enormous, beautiful, intriguingly gorgeous and unique, I'm sure.
posted by byanyothername at 12:40 PM on January 13, 2017 [4 favorites]


I bought a Wii and while I think it is a good system I didn't use it as much as I would have liked. I bought a WiiU and while I think it is a good system I don't use it as much as I would like. I am almost guaranteed to buy a Switch. The one thing that might make things different this time around is that my kids might get old enough to play on it too.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 12:43 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


I'll probably skip this and get the next one, when my daughter is old enough that I can introduce her to Mario and Zelda games, but for now I've just got that charitably described as mediocre Will Smith song stuck in my head.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 12:48 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


I pre-ordered one solely because I can play Zelda on both my TV and in bed quietly with headphones on day 1..
posted by unknownmosquito at 12:49 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


Here are all the confirmed Launch Day games as of right now, via Gamespot:

- 1-2-Switch
- Just Dance 2017
- The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
- Skylanders: Imaginators
- Super Bomberman R

I don't see any reason to pick this up if you already own a Wii U.
posted by Diskeater at 12:51 PM on January 13, 2017


I own a PS4 and a Wii U, and I maintain that any gamer worth his or her salt should own a Wii U in addition to a PS4 or XBone. The Wii U may have been Nintendo's biggest home console flop, but it had a bunch of great first party (that is, Nintendo made) games that really are must play classics. Super Mario 3D World was a much better game than both Galaxy games, and they were excellent. Mario Kart 8 is without doubt the best Mario Kart game ever made. Donkey Kong was hard but a blast. The list goes on.

I've pre-ordered a Switch and I'm excited to see what Nintendo gives me. I hope they succeed because I think a world without Nintendo is a world where gaming will become nothing more than iterations on Call of Duty and Battlefield, which is to say, a world where gaming is paint by numbers,
posted by Effigy2000 at 12:54 PM on January 13, 2017 [12 favorites]


Seems like this could just be a fancy controller for an iPad plus a few games on the iOS App Store.
posted by blue_beetle at 12:54 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


The entire Japanese stream was basically "Dooooon't buy this at launch."

The fact that they trotted someone out from Sega and he couldn't actually name any games they were even developing was definitely something.

I'm in the market for something that has the hardware form factor of tablet mode, but just streams games from Steam. But there's nothing quite there.
posted by selfnoise at 12:55 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


I preordered one and I'm going to get one for each of my nephews for Christmas 2017 (I'm not that sexist I just don't have any nieces).
posted by Talez at 1:00 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


The only video for this I've seen is cow milking which who knows, maybe it'll be the hot moment game for families like Wii Bowling was.
posted by msbutah at 1:03 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


cow milk n chill?
posted by Tevin at 1:05 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


I might buy a Switch so SO and I can play Mario Kart together, but I’m already suffering major console fatigue. We play Path of Exile together on our laptops, I play a ton of Hearthstone on my iPad/phone, and I usually play a bit of Animal Crossing or Ace Attorney or Pokemon on my 3DS before bed, which means ... I have no idea where this fits into my routine.

I’m not a huge console gamer — I own the PS2 and Wii, but never really got into them the way I did the DS Lite or 3DS or Vita — so maybe I’m not the intended audience. (Then again, I just admitted to having owned/used five different consoles in 10 years so maybe I am precisely the intended audience!)

But this feels really underwhelming, in the way that the new 3DS was sort of but not really an upgrade from the 3DS.
posted by angst at 1:06 PM on January 13, 2017


Asking if it can compete against the big consoles is like asking if the new Chevy Malibu can compete against the BMW 3-Series.

Actually, the "Chevy Switch" sounds like a totally plausible model name, targeted at millennials or something.

And though I would never drive a mini van, I could maybe be convinced to throw the kids into a Ford X-Box. But I'd really prefer a sleek Audi PS4, if I could afford it.
posted by Kabanos at 1:07 PM on January 13, 2017 [5 favorites]


Please don't throw your kids.

although maybe someone needs to make a kid-throwing-centric video game because we've all had that urge sometimes, right?
posted by hippybear at 1:11 PM on January 13, 2017


Don't care about the Classic, but I might be at the point where I'd murder for a regular-sized New 3DS not-XL at a not-scalping price point. Nintendo, you had pictures on your website in November claiming that thing had a $99 MSRP and I am damned if I'm paying more.

Bring me some Fire Emblem or Etrian Odyssey or Ace Attorney and I'm there with the Switch. Also probably Animal Crossing, but at this point AC just blinks at me and makes me feel guilty for not visiting my town, which is no doubt a ghost town now because it can't really operate without a token human. And its failed economy and depressed, bored, fighty residents are all my fault.

Or Picross. Picross is the best thing there is in the world.
posted by asperity at 1:12 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


After taking a slump in the announcement, Nintendo shares dropped again.

the £280 price is a touch higher than I'd have liked (thanks Brexit!)

I don't think it's Brexit (at least directly), but the console is actually more expensive in Europe in general. The street price here is €330 (higher than £ exchange rate), same in Spain, and also in Amazon .fr and .de (because I don't know any actual stores there). Accessories are also looking expensive, and (allegedly) charging €70 for Wii U rehashes seems a bit rich.
posted by lmfsilva at 1:19 PM on January 13, 2017


hippybear: "Please don't throw your kids.

although maybe someone needs to make a kid-throwing-centric video game because we've all had that urge sometimes, right?
"

Check out the upcoming title Dad Quest. (Somehow I got on the publisher's mailing list, and there is enough amusing stuff I haven't unsubbed/Unroll'd.)
posted by Samizdata at 1:21 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


Accessories are also looking expensive, and (allegedly) charging €70 for Wii U rehashes seems a bit rich.

Have you heard about Apple's new $160 ear buds?
posted by hippybear at 1:22 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


Nintendo makes consoles to sell Nintendo games. Selling consoles is only the means to sell more games.

Uhh, did you mean the absolute opposite of this? Nintendo has had ample opportunity to pack it in as a hardware manufacture and their titles would sell just fine if they found their way onto other platforms. Moreover, unlike every other console manufacturer, Nintendo has never taken a loss on the price of the console itself.
posted by juv3nal at 1:26 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


Oh as for the switch itself, I'm with adrianhon. The weird gimmicky stuff is...weird and gimmicky, but as a refresh for the 3DS, I'm onboard. Also it's getting a new title from the people behind the bravely deafult series that looks gorgeous.
posted by juv3nal at 1:33 PM on January 13, 2017


Nope, I mean exactly that! Of course they would sell a bajillion games across other consoles BUT they wouldn't have the control they have by selling them on their own consoles (new iPhone dalliances notwithstanding). They care about controlling the experience top to bottom and making a profit doing it.

Though, making games to sell consoles also fits in the same way. My point is that they don't GAF about third party and never will.
posted by Tevin at 1:33 PM on January 13, 2017


My point is that they don't GAF about third party and never will.

Well they care enough to pay lip service to it in the hopes that it'll sell more consoles, but otherwise point taken.
posted by juv3nal at 1:37 PM on January 13, 2017


All the talk around Super Mario Odyssey is about the human city level, which had me worried to be honest. But when he got in the sky-submarine to visit crazy rainbow chef planet they had me on board.
posted by Gary at 1:40 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


My point is that they don't GAF about third party and never will.

They care enough to make sure that the Guitar Heroes and Just Dances of the world can work on their console. They're always behind in horsepower so they'll never be a Titanfall or what have you for their console.
posted by GuyZero at 1:40 PM on January 13, 2017


Moreover, unlike every other console manufacturer, Nintendo has never taken a loss on the price of the console itself.

The Wii U was initially sold at a loss, which contributed to Nintendo posting its first ever losses in the stock market.
posted by kewb at 1:42 PM on January 13, 2017


I stand corrected.

Oh with regard to that game from the bravely default team, I found a teaser video with a suitably inane title: Project Octopath Traveller
posted by juv3nal at 1:45 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


> But is it enough to compete against the XBox One and PS4

It's not intended to compete with them.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 1:46 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


People have limited money and, more pressingly, limited HDMI ports. But as a portable perhaps this gets around the 4 HDMI input limitation.

4 HDMI inputs? Some of us dream of having 4 HDMI inputs!
posted by jason_steakums at 1:47 PM on January 13, 2017 [5 favorites]


One thing that doesn't seem to have been discussed much is if any of the 3DS top-tier titles are going to come to this thing. Mario, great, where's the new Pokemon?
posted by GuyZero at 1:55 PM on January 13, 2017


a new Shin Megami Tensei but no one knows what it is

I'm assuming V based on the trailer and the anniversary site. And fingers crossed it won't be a Nintendo exclusive like IV(:A).
posted by Bangaioh at 1:57 PM on January 13, 2017


You know you can get a 4x1 HDMI switch on Monoprice for like $20, right? If you have one or more HDMI ports, there is literally zero reason to not buy whatever HDMI-equipped thing that strikes your fancy.
posted by wierdo at 1:57 PM on January 13, 2017 [4 favorites]


One thing that doesn't seem to have been discussed much is if any of the 3DS top-tier titles are going to come to this thing.

Will the Switch play 3DS titles as-is, or do you have to buy all-new "discs"?
posted by My Dad at 2:13 PM on January 13, 2017


The WiiU Zelda has a release date of December 31, 2017 on both Best Buy and EB Games here in Canada.
If I pre-order now, they'll give me the game on March 3rd, right?
posted by chococat at 2:14 PM on January 13, 2017


ooh the takeaway for me is to get the next Zelda on Wii U. but wait, I still haven't finished Ocarina!
posted by the antecedent of that pronoun at 2:24 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


From what I've seen online, even those who have run the entire game many times are never truly finished with Ocarina.
posted by hippybear at 2:37 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


I continue to be concerned about Princess Peach's security precautions in the Mushroom Kingdom. It sure does seem easy to kidnap people.
posted by poe at 2:38 PM on January 13, 2017 [5 favorites]


>The WiiU Zelda has a release date of December 31, 2017

Five days after Christmas? Is there some master-tactician's-eleven-dimensional-chess reason why that's not completely stupid?
posted by Sing Or Swim at 2:39 PM on January 13, 2017 [6 favorites]


With all that connecting & disconnecting & torque being applied across the join for the controllers as you play in portable configuration it just looks like a recipe for hardware failure.
posted by scalefree at 2:41 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


And all those false leads about the various castles. I mean, it's like there's no actual intelligence service information that is trusted in the Mushroom Kingdom.
posted by hippybear at 2:41 PM on January 13, 2017 [6 favorites]


I'm a little scared that they're being picky about calling it a home console that can do handheld (rather than the other way around) specifically because they're not planning to put Pokemon on it.
posted by 256 at 2:42 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


Check out the upcoming title Dad Quest.

dying
posted by Existential Dread at 2:45 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


Never had a Wii U so I'm not worried about the rereleases like Mario Kart 8. In fact, when Mario Kart 8 comes out at the end of April is the earliest I'd pick up a Switch. My partner and I both want the system, and are ready to hop back in to the Nintendo ecosystem but we're not ready to drop the $400 CAD on a system just to play Zelda. So at least 2 games need to be out that we'd actually play and that's looking like late spring.
posted by thecjm at 2:57 PM on January 13, 2017


GuyZero: Unfortunately most SNL videos are behind paywalls or geoblocked, but I'd like to add that the new Switch is also both a dessert topping and a floor wax.

You can read the transcript, and if you have access, here's the clip on Hulu. Dirt, grime, even black heel marks, wipe clean with a damp mop. Perks up anything from an ice cream sundae to a pumpkin pie!
posted by filthy light thief at 2:59 PM on January 13, 2017


I don't know if this can really be said to compete against xBone and PS4. I don't really see this as something people get instead of one of those other consoles but in addition to one of them or as a substitute because they're more expensive.

I think you're wrong. I think you're overlooking a pretty big market segment of "casual gamers" as well as less-casual gamers who don't feel the need to keep up with cutting edge AAA console titles.

I'm a pretty avid gamer and the only home console I have ever bought retail in my adult life (which I'm sad to admit now spans two decades) is a Wii. I didn't buy a used xbox 360 until seven years after launch. I will probably buy a Switch, if the reviews are good once people actually have their hands on it.

The reason that I don't have an XBOX1 or a PS4 is not because they're out of my budget. I could afford one if I wanted to spend the money on it, but because they don't seem to offer very good value in terms of what I want.

On a similar not, my 65-y.o. mom, also bought herself a Wii, and may well buy a Switch. I can't imagine a scenario in which an xbox1 or PS4 would begin to appeal to her.

So, I mean, you're right. It's not really competing with the xbox1 or ps4, because I don't think there are going to be a lot of people (other than parents) hemming and hawing about whether they should buy a ps4 or a switch. There are people who will want a ps4. And there are people who will want a switch. And there will be people who want both. But I really think they're scratching different itches.
posted by 256 at 3:23 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


It's basically a gaming tablet. I wonder if it runs some customized version of Android? It seems like it would be a lot easier to sell if it was a competent general-use tablet on the side, vs. just being a game console and not doing anything else.
posted by Mitrovarr at 3:26 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


In terms of cost, it's typically possible to buy a PS4 or XB1 for less than $300, sometimes even with a packed in game or games.
posted by selfnoise at 3:30 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


Yeah, $400 Canadian, ouch.
EB Games has a trade-in where they'll give you $150 for your Wii U. So that's $250 for a Switch but then you lose your whole library of WiiU games, and accessories (4 controllers, a steering wheel thing, a gun thing, etc. we got 'em all) won't work on the Switch. And it's $100 Canadian for another set of Switch controllers.
I think we're good with just the Wii U Zelda game, if I can ever get my pre-order to go through on the website.
posted by chococat at 3:35 PM on January 13, 2017


I wonder if it runs some customized version of Android?

haha, no. The hardware is probably very close to what an Android tablet would be, but this is Nintendo's device from resistors to texture packs.
posted by GuyZero at 3:36 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


I’ve bought every Nintendo console N64 onwards (and every iteration of Gameboys since GB Color), so I am of course on board with this one. I’m sorry that the Wii-U has not been a success, for it is a remarkably clever gaming machine — I’m replaying Wind Waker (HD) at the moment. Be it Mario or Zelda (my two main titles), the game designers at Nintendo are amazing.

I have never felt any urge to buy a Microsoft or Sony console — it has always seemed to me that a PC was a far better platform for the games that have dominated on those platforms.
posted by bouvin at 3:45 PM on January 13, 2017


I have never felt any urge to buy a Microsoft or Sony console

I had a friend who had an Xbox One with a Kinect and we used it to do Skype video chat on his giant television, and the way the Kinect camera would track who was in the picture and stuff felt very Star Trek to me and i nearly bought a similar unit because of that, but I hardly every Skype with anyone and it seemed like a silly purchase no matter HOW FUCKING COOL that experience was.

I hear you can also play videogames on those units.
posted by hippybear at 3:50 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


I don't know why any of you fools would buy this when you could build a thing out of a Raspberry Pi and a few more Raspberri Pis for controllers, and then you could hook it up to the Raspberry Pi rigged up as a TV and make some popcorn in your Ras
posted by DoctorFedora at 3:57 PM on January 13, 2017 [33 favorites]


I don't know why any of you fools would buy this when you could build a thing out of a Raspberry Pi and a few more Raspberri Pis for controllers, and then you could hook it up to the Raspberry Pi rigged up as a TV and make some popcorn in your Ras

Because the dozens of hours I would spend making that shit and getting it to work is worth much more than $300 to me.
posted by Talez at 4:08 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


A joke explained is never a funny joke.
posted by hippybear at 4:10 PM on January 13, 2017 [9 favorites]


My biggest regret is using the word "fools" instead of "chumps"
posted by DoctorFedora at 4:24 PM on January 13, 2017 [10 favorites]


Don't know how I feel about a 2D Sonic game with both yay! FM synths! and boo! obnoxious over-compression pumping!
posted by infinitewindow at 4:30 PM on January 13, 2017


I'm excited for this as a mobile console. I have an XB1 (which I'll probably upgrade to Scorpio) and a PS4 so I don't need another powerful home system. I have a Vita which is super nice but long ago stopped receiving support in the US, and even Japanese devs have started to abandon it.

If the Switch can be the new home of both Nintendo portable games (Pokemon/etc) and JRPGs/Visual Novels (looking promising, with Xenoblade 2 / Shin Megami Tensei / Square Enix Thing / DragonQuest / etc) AND give me more Mario/Zelda, it will fill a perfect niche for me. No region locking is key to this (especially Visual Novels) which is another reason I'm excited (Sony and MS ditched it long ago, but Nintendo has had it for a long time unfortunately).
posted by thefoxgod at 4:32 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


Just as a historic note, Nintendo invented the original AAA game economic system after the first video game bust fueled by an oversaturated market and poor quality control. It probably saved the industry as we know it, but vertical control of what gets on their system is still pretty much in their heritage. (Sony and Microsoft do it also, they're just a bit more open about licensing their APIs.)
posted by CBrachyrhynchos at 4:34 PM on January 13, 2017 [2 favorites]


As for cost, I'll be really surprised if they don't drop the price for the holidays. But right now pre-orders are selling out rapidly, so there's no reason for them not to pick up extra $$$ from those who want it NOW then drop the price to pick up more sales once there's some slack in the pipeline.
posted by thefoxgod at 4:35 PM on January 13, 2017


Release dates for the games. I didn't realize a lot of those weren't launch titles. Even the upgraded Mario Kart couldn't make it for launch.

I just finished Wind Waker and am not up for another Zelda right away. It looks like I might have pre-ordered a very fancy paperweight for two months.
posted by Gary at 4:45 PM on January 13, 2017


Unfortunately most SNL videos are behind paywalls or geoblocked, but I'd like to add that the new Switch is also both a dessert topping and a floor wax.

You can read the transcript, and if you have access, here's the clip on Hulu.

The New Shimmer skit is freely available on NBC's website. No paywall or registration or anything.
posted by John Cohen at 5:06 PM on January 13, 2017


1. So this replaces the Wii?

2. Remember when companies jealousy guarded their biggest announcements for E3?
posted by Beholder at 5:23 PM on January 13, 2017


so real talk here but

when they showed Mario in very realistic Definitely Not New York did anyone get uncomfortable 3D Sonic Game vibes? Granted, the fork people later in the trailer convinced me 100% that they know what they're doing, so
posted by DoctorFedora at 5:54 PM on January 13, 2017


I don't know why any of you fools would buy this when you could build a thing out of a Raspberry Pi and a few more Raspberri Pis for controllers, and then you could hook it up to the Raspberry Pi rigged up as a TV and make some popcorn in your Ras

I suppose if you have no other responsibilities in your life this could work.
posted by My Dad at 6:18 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


So it's a fucking tablet? With great controllers and cool first-party software?

Well, sign me up. This may very well be the first piece of Nintendo hardware (or any gaming hardware) that I purchase in its opening year.

Nintendo is trying to occupy that space between simple mobile gaming and tedious console gaming, and that's exactly the space in which I live.

I just want to lie down on the couch, pick up a thing, and play for 20 mins (my PS3 takes 10 mins just to boot). I want a good controller. And I want games that take longer than 90 mins to complete.

This looks right up my alley.
posted by i_have_a_computer at 6:25 PM on January 13, 2017 [3 favorites]


So this replaces the Wii?

This replaces the Wii U, and overlaps with the 3DS. I expect they will keep making 3DS for a while but may eventually stop that as well. I expect game devs will follow the install base, if enough people get Switches 3DS will probably start a long slow decline.
posted by thefoxgod at 6:31 PM on January 13, 2017


Existential Dread: "Check out the upcoming title Dad Quest.

dying
"

Glad to oblige.
posted by Samizdata at 6:46 PM on January 13, 2017


It's a floor wax! It's a dessert topping!

Darn it. I need a floor topping and a dessert wax.
posted by nubs at 6:57 PM on January 13, 2017


How has none mentioned Project Octopath Traveler yet
posted by Elementary Penguin at 7:06 PM on January 13, 2017


Preordered on Amazon, but I might cancel the order before March. Nothing in the launch lineup thrills me. I already own a Wii U and Mario Kart 8. Extra controllers are expensive as well, and I'll want a $70 Pro Controller.

Waiting for a bundle this Christmas with Super Mario Odyssey.
posted by porn in the woods at 7:19 PM on January 13, 2017


A hidden interesting thing here is, they're releasing a new Bomberman for the first time in years. I think its the first one since Konami bought out Hudson. Four player Super Bomberman remains the most local multiplayer game you can play.
posted by JHarris at 8:27 PM on January 13, 2017 [6 favorites]


This is pretty much everything I want from Nintendo. I just hope it's comfortable.
posted by inpHilltr8r at 9:23 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


Darn it. I need a floor topping and a dessert wax.

Got you covered.
posted by NMcCoy at 11:14 PM on January 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


I had seen the news about the pricing, but Xenoblade 2 was a great surprise and that Zelda clip was very meaty.
posted by ersatz at 3:43 AM on January 14, 2017


I have just learned some very important information about Breath of the Wild, which strongly affects my feelings about purchasing the game:

YOU CAN WIELD A MOP
posted by NMcCoy at 4:08 AM on January 14, 2017 [3 favorites]


THIS changes EVERYTHING
posted by DoctorFedora at 4:16 AM on January 14, 2017


I may have preordered a Switch.
posted by ersatz at 8:00 AM on January 14, 2017


How has none mentioned Project Octopath Traveler yet

*ahem*
posted by juv3nal at 1:46 PM on January 14, 2017 [1 favorite]


What killed Wii U was the total lack of first party launch titles. Nintendo's lone advantage is their crapload of beloved IP - only Nintendo can put out Mario, Zelda, DK, Metroid, Smash, Mario Kart, Star Fox, Kirby, etc. Wii U had one Mario game ready to go, then nothing for 4-6 months, with Zelda being delayed now going on 2 years. And even now it has the smallest library of any current gen console, where 70% of it is crap, shitty ports or just worthless garbage titles. They completely blew the release schedule, and never had enough first party titles ready to go in a timely manner.

It's pretty disappointing to see the Switch start off on the same path. If they launched it 6 months later, with Zelda, Mario, Dk or maybe Metroid games all ready to drop on Day 1, it would kill. If they drag their feet again, delaying major releases interminably and failing to actually make use of their vast IP catalog, Switch will underperform again. People have too many gaming options to drop $300 on a system for one game and a promise of later title support...someday, maybe.
posted by T.D. Strange at 2:36 PM on January 14, 2017 [2 favorites]


Sure, Zelda being delayed forever didn't help, but some good titles from the usual third party suspects could have filled the library a bit and mitigate the lack of big first party titles.

But, it's Nintendo's strategy. They know enough people will forget their previous console spent most of the previous years gathering dust as soon as a new Mario or Zelda title is announced. That won't change until they arrive at a Shenmue situation where the platform userbase is too small for new releases being realistically profitable (and even then, I'm guessing the pokémon franchise will keep them profitable enough to continue with the same model).
posted by lmfsilva at 5:14 PM on January 14, 2017


only Nintendo can put out Mario, Zelda, DK, Metroid, Smash, Mario Kart, Star Fox, Kirby, etc.

Well, I mean. They can put out more Metroid. Theoretically.

Thank god for AM2R, at least.
posted by jason_steakums at 6:31 PM on January 14, 2017 [1 favorite]


Preorders are selling out pretty much everywhere, based pretty much on the existence of Zelda as a launch title. That's a good sign for the platform -- Twilight Princess sold to nearly 75 percent of Wii buyers at launch.

But it seems Nintendo just can't pump out 3d Zelda games quickly enough. There's a fairly clear trend of decline:

SNES: 2? (A Link to the Past, BS Zelda?)
N64: 2 (Ocarina of Time, Majora's Mask)
GC: 1.5 (Wind Waker, Twilight Princess)
Wii: 1.5 (Twilight Princess, Skyward Sword)
Wii U: .5 (Breath of the Wild)
Switch: .5? (Breath of the Wild)

Wind Waker seemingly solve the challenge of open world design by making most of the world static deep ocean, and they still had to cut content. One theory: every HD remake delays a the release of a real new Zelda by a year :3

I'm actually kinda excited for Redout, which has a pretty good F-Zero vibe.
posted by pwnguin at 12:01 AM on January 15, 2017 [2 favorites]


Or they push out a repackaged remake to cover for the delay in a new game
posted by T.D. Strange at 6:53 AM on January 15, 2017


I'm actually feeling pretty good about the Switch launch lineup. There aren't a ton of games announced for 2017 so far but what's been announced looks very very good. Like, there's a sort of "quality over quantity" approach in there that I find very appealing (I will be buying Snipperclips on day one).

The presence of games being announced for Switch alongside PS4 and Xbox One is encouraging given the Everything But Wii U phenomenon. At the same time, I wonder if Nintendo is going to be a bit more selective with the stuff they allow to go up on the downloadable store given that the Wii U spent most of its lifespan with little more than whatever a step below "shovelware" is called (remember Meme Run?).

Broadly speaking, I'm feeling optimistic if only because of the sheer number of games already announced that are built around exploring a giant open world. ; )
posted by DoctorFedora at 3:06 PM on January 15, 2017 [2 favorites]


I don't know why any of you fools would buy this when you could build a thing out of a Raspberry Pi and a few more Raspberri Pis for controllers, and then you could hook it up to the Raspberry Pi rigged up as a TV and make some popcorn in your Ras

The console is the easy part. You buy a console for the games (this is especially true for Nintendo consoles). Many of these games have bigger budgets than Hollywood movies. For example, here's a listing of the staff who created Mario Kart 8. It is a whole different level of work than putting together a homebrew game machine out of a Raspberry Pi. There's a good reason the Kickstarter game console Ouya flopped.
posted by eye of newt at 6:58 PM on January 15, 2017


It's probably not going to be an exclusive, but I just discovered that Rime will be coming to the switch. Rime looks extremely my jam, though I am just as/more likely to pick it up on ps4.
posted by juv3nal at 9:14 PM on January 15, 2017


Sega hasn't made a non-shit Sonic game since 1992.

Oh, I don't know, I had a lotta time for Sonic Adventure. But my heart sank when I saw Christian Whitehead's card come up on the trailer. I love Sonic, but there's only so many platforms I need a reheated version of the original Sonic on. I even have it for my iPod Classic ffs.
posted by bonaldi at 7:19 AM on January 16, 2017


And even now it has the smallest library of any current gen console, where 70% of it is crap, shitty ports or just worthless garbage titles.

That's all consoles, in fact 70% is a bit low.

It's pretty disappointing to see the Switch start off on the same path.

The Wii's starting first-party support wasn't so great either. It was Wii Sports and Zelda and that was about it. And I hope Wii Sports doesn't go away; the thing that kept me away from its Wii U incarnation was its ridiculous pricing plan, where you basically had to re-buy it piecemeal. But it remains a game that me and my friends would play a lot of.

SNES: 2? (A Link to the Past, BS Zelda?)

The SNES did not have a 3D Zelda. You also leave out portable systems, which excludes no less than three games. And Ocarina of Time Master Quest should count for something on GC and 3DS. And leaving out 2D Zeldas is kind of limiting, because it excludes a lot, especially on GB, GBC and GBA. The result is a clear trend of decline only because you prune out the data that reveals the complications.
posted by JHarris at 8:42 AM on January 16, 2017 [1 favorite]


DS Zelda games are the best Zelda games. Phantom Hourglass and Spirit Tracks were awesome.

Honestly, the game I most want to play right now but don't own a console for is Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance, and I regret giving away my GameCube years ago. Would be awesome if Nintendo did a better job making the back catalog available on newer devices. As it is, now I'm wondering if I should find a used GameCube and pay $100+ for a used copy of the game, or just pirate it, play it on a cheap tablet and hope the ROM I find doesn't also expose me to a malware infestation.

Seriously, if Nintendo were to just promise that they'll make a lot more old stuff available for a reasonable price for the Switch, I'd be all over that. Keeping boxes and boxes of old consoles and physical copies of ancient games is not KonMari-compatible for me, and it'd be nice if they did more to enable non-hoarder lifestyle choices (and profit thereby, because neither of my proposed methods for playing Path of Radiance gets them a dime.)
posted by asperity at 12:05 PM on January 16, 2017 [1 favorite]


I've seen at least one person note that the sort of "trickle" of releases for the Switch is probably a very deliberate strategy after the Wii U went five months after launch without a game release (until… LEGO City Undercover?). It looks like there's going to be a fairly major release almost every month this year, which should be good for building a sort of slow burn of hype going into the Holiday Season.
posted by DoctorFedora at 6:35 PM on January 16, 2017


Hey, Lego City Undercover is a secret gem of the system, it's the only Lego game to keep my interest to 100%, and that's a big 100%.
posted by JHarris at 7:36 PM on January 16, 2017


Oh, I'm not suggesting that wasn't a good game or anything! Just saying that there was a five-month drought of any Wii U games being released on discs between launch and that.
posted by DoctorFedora at 8:24 PM on January 16, 2017


The latest in Switch news

- Zelda: Breath of the Wild takes up almost half of the Switch’s storage

- Nintendo Switch’s included Joy-Con Grip is not the same as $30 Charging Grip

Out of the box, if you buy the digital version of Zelda it will take up half your available memory. And if you're using the Jon-Con controllers in TV mode and the batteries die, you have to switch (I'm sorry) to handheld mode to continue gaming while they charge. Or you could drop an extra $100 on the Jon-Con grip that actually charges and a decently large SD card.
posted by thecjm at 9:27 AM on January 17, 2017


If the Joy-Cons actually last 20 hours that should be ok as long as they have a reliable way to see what the power level is. Playing handheld doesn't sound any worse than sitting four feet in front of my TV because my PS4 controller lost power and I had to plug it in.
posted by Gary at 9:56 AM on January 17, 2017 [2 favorites]


- Zelda: Breath of the Wild takes up almost half of the Switch’s storage

So it'll end up being like the DS where you'll need to buy the cartridges. Seems not-unreasonable. Or you'll need to buy an SD card. Like every electronic device today, there are hidden costs for optional-not-optional expansions.
posted by GuyZero at 10:10 AM on January 17, 2017 [2 favorites]


They care enough to make sure that the Guitar Heroes and Just Dances of the world can work on their console.

Seriously. Is there even one current console game that uses a dance pad? Did that whole fad just shuffle on by five years ago, or what?

Outside of Japan, I never see them at all anymore.*


* This phrase, come to think of it, applies to so, so much.
posted by rokusan at 12:01 PM on January 17, 2017 [2 favorites]


Just Dance's simplified one-controller UI seems to have beat out DDR and the dancepad in the us. We had DDR for the Wii and it was hard. Just Dance on Wii U satisfies the target audience and is so much simpler.
posted by GuyZero at 1:20 PM on January 17, 2017


Is there even one current console game that uses a dance pad?

Dance pads are finicky beasts. Cheap ones often are terrible to play with, while proper ones need a lot of maintenance (I once talked to an arcade operator that had one, but got tired of the constant maintenance they require and would not rent it, just sell it with all spares and a bon voyage)

I'm guessing dancing games that use the camera are more practical as consumer products these days.
posted by lmfsilva at 8:20 PM on January 17, 2017


So it'll end up being like the DS where you'll need to buy the cartridges. Seems not-unreasonable. Or you'll need to buy an SD card. Like every electronic device today, there are hidden costs for optional-not-optional expansions.

Let's be real: buying the cartridges is a far better value -- your doctrine of first sale right remains intact. You can lend it to the kid down the street, and after you complete it yourself you can sell it. The only platform I know of that acknowledges this is Steam, where discounts from MSRP are often huge (but hard to time).
posted by pwnguin at 10:30 PM on January 17, 2017 [3 favorites]


I'm wouldn't recommend buying anything digitally for the switch until someone can confirm they finally stop locking purchases to your system instead of to your account.

They are launching an Online Service that looks a lot like Xbox Gold and PSN Plus. Monthly classic games is a great use of their back catalog. I'm hoping they get it right this time, because Splatoon 2 is a big reason I'm getting this early.
posted by Gary at 11:18 AM on January 18, 2017 [1 favorite]


It's just ridiculous that it sounds like each game you get from the subscription is only playable for a month. Half the reason I keep buying a PS Plus subscription every year is the enormous backlog of games I haven't gotten around to playing yet. Plus, life gets in the way, and I have no desire to play anything on a deadline.

Why is Nintendo taking an existing idea and making it worse?
posted by asperity at 2:16 PM on January 18, 2017 [1 favorite]


Ugh. I thought that was bad phrasing and the price was reduced only for a month. But you're right you can only play the game that month.
posted by Gary at 2:29 PM on January 18, 2017 [1 favorite]


Yeah, the digital download thing is part of why I'm preordering the console but waiting for a bit to actually preorder Zelda. I'm in Japan but would like to play in English (I generally prefer NoA's localizations to the original Japanese) and I'm waiting to find out if I'll be able to buy it digitally from the US if the Japan cartridge doesn't include English text. Likewise, whether we buy a second Switch seems heavily contingent on whether we'd be able to download one game onto both for, say, Splatoon 2. Multi-console downloads like PSN would definitely take the edge off of not being able to sell a game we're done with.
posted by DoctorFedora at 2:56 PM on January 18, 2017


If they were the first to market with a console game subscription service, we'd probably think one game for a month wasn't such a bad deal, but... they're not.
posted by asperity at 3:02 PM on January 18, 2017 [1 favorite]


Uh, are people still expecting Nintendo to get things right (other than their games), even after everyone else got that right? Further proof of that: More Nintendo Switch info suggests you'll want that smartphone app if you're interested in online multiplayer.
posted by lmfsilva at 6:07 AM on January 19, 2017 [1 favorite]


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