My dude looks like the Babadook

March 16, 2017 6:07 AM

82-tweet twitter thread from @spookperson that breaks down some of the recent controversy surrounding Libertarian Conservative and Trump Advisor Roger Stone Jr. Fairly important work here in uncovering some of the complexities surrounding this figure's politics.
posted by Greg Nog (74 comments total)

This is my favorite genre of Twitter
posted by dismas at 6:10 AM on March 16, 2017 [7 favorites]

folks I don't have a lot to say but the only thing bigger than my man here's top hat is the number of unreported deaths in his sawmill
posted by Sticherbeast at 6:18 AM on March 16, 2017 [28 favorites]

my man looks like he crawled out of a haunted who framed roger rabbit vhs
posted by beerperson at 6:21 AM on March 16, 2017 [10 favorites]

my dude has had syphilis for so long his dick falls down his pant leg if he walks too fast
posted by pxe2000 at 6:24 AM on March 16, 2017 [4 favorites]

My dude is spreading vicious rumors about the box trolls.
posted by drezdn at 6:30 AM on March 16, 2017 [3 favorites]

I've read enough Neil Gaiman books to know that when this photo was taken that woman was alone.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 6:32 AM on March 16, 2017 [39 favorites]

This is just one more instance of how the worst people from high school now govern us - we have the right-wing smelly nerds (Bannon, naturally), the stupid rich kids, the Cool With The Bros sorority girl and the M'Lady Let Me Doff My Fedora Before I Neg You guy.
posted by Frowner at 6:46 AM on March 16, 2017 [43 favorites]

Scum. The most wretched, festering sort sort of proto tri-ungulate scum, and I am not sure why this piece of shit has gotten such a free ride over the years from media such as The New Yorker and the NYT.
posted by Phlegmco(tm) at 6:52 AM on March 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

"My man about to fire off an outraged telegram to Harper's Weekly over his depiction in the latest Thomas Nast cartoon."

That's very good stuff, especially for so far down the list.
posted by wenestvedt at 6:53 AM on March 16, 2017 [15 favorites]

Good to see my man Professor Fate pick up another gig after that disaster in Paris.
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 7:07 AM on March 16, 2017 [4 favorites]

"He can tune," Stone said, when reached for comment.
posted by Kitty Stardust at 7:17 AM on March 16, 2017 [3 favorites]

My dude went to the theatre with Abraham Lincoln and ran away when shit got real.
posted by Dr. Zira at 7:19 AM on March 16, 2017

My man better keep an eye out for Jim West
posted by dismas at 7:22 AM on March 16, 2017 [5 favorites]

Monopoly man was like, "You need to tone it down a bit."
posted by leotrotsky at 7:26 AM on March 16, 2017 [4 favorites]

Dude looks like he just send some Pinkertons to kill Upton Sinclair.
posted by leotrotsky at 7:28 AM on March 16, 2017 [33 favorites]

Its time for some game theory

This is always funny.
posted by The Horse You Rode In On at 7:31 AM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

my boy looks like he once ate the word money and no one could use it for a couple of weeks

I have to stop reading these now in case I get fired. Is the author of these a writer for a political satire show and if not, when can they be.
posted by greenish at 7:32 AM on March 16, 2017 [8 favorites]

Shouldn't the left half of his wife's hair be all white? And wearing fur?
posted by leotrotsky at 7:33 AM on March 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

When Jack Knight's +1 isn't who you'd hoped it'd be.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 7:36 AM on March 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

"Come come, Mr. Bond, you disappoint me. You get as much fulfillment out of killing as I do."
posted by valkane at 7:41 AM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

This is the best thing since the Great Shoe Roast of 2105.
posted by edheil at 7:41 AM on March 16, 2017 [9 favorites]

Mary Poppins due from the Blazing World any minute now.
posted by leotrotsky at 7:45 AM on March 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

I'm just not sure the inauguration is the best place to try out your Dishonored cosplay, my dude
posted by dismas at 7:51 AM on March 16, 2017 [4 favorites]

This is the best thing since the Great Shoe Roast of 2105.

I can't see his feet in the picture -- maybe there's a synergy to be had here!
posted by wenestvedt at 7:51 AM on March 16, 2017

Slender Man looks so much shorter in person.
posted by leotrotsky at 7:55 AM on March 16, 2017 [11 favorites]

My contribution was along the lines of what if the Penguin was hired to be the new Monopoly mascot dude, but srsly what is with Stone's fetish for pinstripes so thick and prominent they look like an old-tymey prison uniform?
posted by Existential Dread at 7:56 AM on March 16, 2017

Judge Doom's only smiling because he knows he's getting to put a toon in The Dip later.
posted by Joeruckus at 8:03 AM on March 16, 2017 [4 favorites]

my man looks like the only things he hates more than child labor laws are scoob and the gang

Perfect.
posted by bondcliff at 8:05 AM on March 16, 2017 [6 favorites]

my man just got back from the tim burton "Baron Von Swindlestein" casting call

give him a break. he looks really good for someone who survived the hindenburg by using a waiter's body as a parachute.

if you think this is a good look, you should've seen what he wore to the kaiser's 85th birthday gala

my man looks like the second half of his itinerary after the inauguration is "Steal cursed diamond from the Smithsonian."
posted by codacorolla at 8:13 AM on March 16, 2017 [18 favorites]

If you haven't read his Wikipedia bio, you really ought. It's amazing. I mean the guy literally has a Nixon tattoo.
posted by LastOfHisKind at 8:17 AM on March 16, 2017

Respectfully, "Has a Nixon tattoo" is underselling the size, location, and appearance of said tattoo.
posted by codacorolla at 8:19 AM on March 16, 2017 [22 favorites]

my man looks like he still draws his S's like big ol' F's

if you think the suit is classy, you should treat yourself and check out the filigree on his coffin

my man looks like he got renfield to take this piccy for him

my man looks he's had latin shouted at him, angrily, by between 3 to 4 priests
posted by codacorolla at 8:39 AM on March 16, 2017 [9 favorites]

Man, that Nixon tattoo. I told my friend I've been thinking of getting a tattoo, and we keep sending each other pictures of bad tattoos being like "this is the one. This will by my new tattoo."

But this. This is the one.
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 8:48 AM on March 16, 2017 [6 favorites]

Oh come on. If you're gonna get a Nixon tat across the shoulder blades, at least make it this pic.
posted by neckro23 at 8:57 AM on March 16, 2017 [3 favorites]

That is not a Nixon tattoo. That is Nixon's head, living on, on Quirrell's back.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 9:03 AM on March 16, 2017 [19 favorites]

my dudes


he dresses like this in hopes of distracting us from nixon tattoo*

*this should be blink tag...rip blink tag
posted by nixon's meatloaf at 9:29 AM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

That is some quality riffing.
posted by GuyZero at 9:53 AM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

but srsly what is with Stone's fetish for pinstripes so thick and prominent they look like an old-tymey prison uniform?

That's just his subconscious response to the small part of him whimpering from under the park bench in Limbo.

It knows where he belongs.
posted by leotrotsky at 9:59 AM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

my man's never wanted anything more out of life than an opportunity to fuck shit up and cosplay an extraterrestrial parasite.

To serve Trump you gotta dress like the vampire-werewolf alliance that has shaped human history from the shadows
— Zedd's Not Dead‏ @ZeddRebel

posted by octobersurprise at 10:32 AM on March 16, 2017 [5 favorites]

neckro23: "Oh come on. If you're gonna get a Nixon tat across the shoulder blades, at least make it this pic."

This one, I would think.

Or perhaps this one.
posted by Chrysostom at 11:18 AM on March 16, 2017

I didn't recognize him without his devious canine henchman sidekick, Muttley.
posted by jonp72 at 11:19 AM on March 16, 2017 [4 favorites]

my man looks he's had latin shouted at him, angrily, by between 3 to 4 priests

I appreciated this.
posted by Pope Guilty at 11:25 AM on March 16, 2017 [7 favorites]

he dresses like this in hopes of distracting us from nixon tattoo

he dresses like he's mad they wouldn't let him tattoo nixon's features over his actual face
posted by atoxyl at 11:47 AM on March 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

The Guild of Calamitous Intent called, they want their...Roger Stone back.

needs workshopping
posted by prize bull octorok at 1:11 PM on March 16, 2017 [7 favorites]

Respectfully, "Has a Nixon tattoo" is underselling the size, location, and appearance of said tattoo.

And I thought that was part of the joke. That's going to replace the whale in my nightmares. Arooo.
posted by Kitty Stardust at 1:16 PM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

"This is the ideal capitalist body. You may not like it, but this is what peak capitalism looks like."
posted by Kitty Stardust at 1:19 PM on March 16, 2017 [6 favorites]

i'm just glad my dude the snow miser got a new outfit for this year's Royal Ascot
posted by mhum at 1:29 PM on March 16, 2017 [3 favorites]

Nice to see the Night King taking a breather in the off-season.
posted by Kitty Stardust at 1:32 PM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

He looked more human when he was a walking suit and bandages in the shape of a human.

Who knew opening a store selling cursed items could be so lucrative?

BTW has anyone figured out which of the names of the Dark Prince, Roger Stone is an anagram for?
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 2:01 PM on March 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

BTW has anyone figured out which of the names of the Dark Prince, Roger Stone is an anagram for?

Regret Soon
posted by leotrotsky at 2:18 PM on March 16, 2017 [5 favorites]

Roger Jason Stone

A Goon’s Jeer-Snort
posted by little onion at 2:36 PM on March 16, 2017 [4 favorites]

he dresses like he's mad they wouldn't let him tattoo nixon's features over his actual face

my man dresses like he's afraid to tattoo Nixon's face on his balls.
posted by octobersurprise at 2:42 PM on March 16, 2017

this motherfucker looks like he's been hired to sabotage nikola tesla's latest experiment

my dude is feeling pretty pleased about banning ewan mcgregor from entering the moulin rouge

his outfit has some problems
posted by dismas at 2:45 PM on March 16, 2017 [7 favorites]

My dude is planning on bombing the city from his dirigible.
posted by drezdn at 3:17 PM on March 16, 2017 [3 favorites]

My dude was a fan of Ministry when they were on Waxtrax.
posted by drezdn at 3:28 PM on March 16, 2017 [6 favorites]

My boy looks like he's about to emerge from a grave and tell us how 7-Up is the Uncola.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 6:16 PM on March 16, 2017 [3 favorites]

Mr. Nixon, you have this strange Roger Stone - like growth on the back of your head.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 6:18 PM on March 16, 2017

"yo what if my Halloween costume was every Dickens villain at the same time"

heh.
posted by leotrotsky at 7:30 PM on March 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

He's that creepy child-catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang with lollipops on his fingers.
posted by Halloween Jack at 7:34 PM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

dude looks like a count olaf disguise

That was my first thought.
posted by irisclara at 8:06 PM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

My dude looks like he belongs to a Facebook group called 'steampunk but with even more racism'
posted by mcmile at 9:26 PM on March 16, 2017 [6 favorites]

my man is in the same outfit he had on when he got banned from westworld for punching children even after they told him they weren't robots

(that's the one that made me suck a shard of triscuit into my throat as i laughed, causing me to choke and almost die, but it was totally worth it)
posted by palomar at 11:09 PM on March 16, 2017 [7 favorites]

Why does my man look like he's about to tell President McKinley that child labor is ok becausen it's in the bible?
posted by mcmile at 11:30 PM on March 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

dude looks like he had to consult a priest because he got so old his asshole became haunted

I lost it at this one.
posted by nakedmolerats at 7:59 AM on March 17, 2017 [5 favorites]

my big strong boy looks like he's the one who conducted the blood rite that summoned steve bannon to the mortal realm
posted by codacorolla at 10:20 AM on March 17, 2017 [5 favorites]

I now have a medium-to-large-sized crush on this Goth Ms. Frizzle person. I want to hang out with her(?) and mock this outfit until the end of time. One of my personal current favorites: "my dude looks like he got banned from the community center for racist magic shows".
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 10:40 AM on March 17, 2017 [5 favorites]

dude thinks Columbia from Bioshock:Infinite was aspirational.
posted by leotrotsky at 11:22 AM on March 17, 2017 [2 favorites]

I never forgave him for passing along the blueprints for Snoopy's biplane to the Red Baron.
posted by jonp72 at 12:08 PM on March 17, 2017 [4 favorites]

this is the picture before the lone ranger stops my guy from tying someone to a railroad track
posted by dismas at 12:23 PM on March 17, 2017 [1 favorite]

cool that the couple who pretend they live in the victorian era eventually discover time travel and come back for the inauguration i guess
posted by dismas at 12:33 PM on March 17, 2017 [1 favorite]

Very important and hilarious update
posted by dysh at 9:32 PM on March 18, 2017 [10 favorites]

For a man who looks like he's spent a LOT of time on the Internet, Roger Stone just picked the exact wrong way to reply to thousands of people mocking his ridiculous existence without mercy.
posted by codacorolla at 10:15 PM on March 18, 2017 [2 favorites]

Very important and hilarious update

my boy looks like that time Zippy the Pinhead went as Pinhead.
posted by octobersurprise at 8:17 AM on March 19, 2017 [3 favorites]

My boy here is so full of piss and vinegar he's self embalming
posted by benzenedream at 1:08 PM on March 19, 2017 [3 favorites]