I'm partial to ketchup Doritos to my eternal shame
June 7, 2017 10:43 AM   Subscribe

 
This is very important.

Before I read this I will say... 1) Covered Bridge 2) Old Dutch and 3) begrudgingly Lays then there are no others. I may have to retaste Covered Bridge and Old Dutch to confirm my ordering, though.

... and after reading, yup. I haven't had 2 or 5, though.

Next can we do Canadian jalapeno chips, please? My current ranking includes Kettle brand jalapeno chips only. Ms Vickies and the other ones with the milk products in them WTF are you doing stop that.
posted by urbanlenny at 10:49 AM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]


I've never even had PC "Loads of Ketchup" but when I see the bag my mouth starts watering. Damn, I need to get some the next time I'm back up north. Sadly like S&V chips, most ketchup chips are woefully under-seasoned.
posted by GuyZero at 10:54 AM on June 7, 2017


Ketchup is only outmatched in disgust by All-Dress.

Fuck these flavours.
posted by Fizz at 10:54 AM on June 7, 2017 [5 favorites]


1) Covered Bridge

Never heard of them, is that one of those weird Ontario/Quebec things like the knock-off chocolate bars they have at Dollarama?
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 10:54 AM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]


Ah, New Brunswick. Explains the donair flavour.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:01 AM on June 7, 2017


Different ketchup chips for different times. Sometimes you need a quick fix, sometimes you need them to last the whole evening.

Lays probably is (for me) the closest to the Platonic Form of Ketchup Chips, but there's a buildup of tang, which sorta gets a bit much after a while. The Loads of Ketchup hits that point even faster. With their light dustings, Pringles or No Name make for great session Ketchup Chips. Pringles Ketchup has been missing from these parts for a while. Hostess is a good cross between the flavour of Lays and the lightness of a house brand like No Name.
posted by Capt. Renault at 11:01 AM on June 7, 2017 [2 favorites]


Covered Bridge also did Storm Chips last year (a mix of ketchup, dill pickle, BBQ and salt and vinegar chips in one bag) which were strangely delicious.
posted by urbanlenny at 11:02 AM on June 7, 2017


Storm Chips last year (a mix of ketchup, dill pickle, BBQ and salt and vinegar chips in one bag)

Sounds like their take on All-Dress.
posted by Fizz at 11:07 AM on June 7, 2017


Hostess 4 Lyfe!
posted by rocket88 at 11:12 AM on June 7, 2017 [2 favorites]


My husband has an appointment booked to have the smilin', finger snappin', sunglass wearin' Old Dutch ketchup bottle mascot tattooed on him in the very near future. I'm glad he has chosen to represent the right brand.
posted by wats at 11:14 AM on June 7, 2017 [2 favorites]


I was really irked by this list.

First of all, ranking 10 varieties of ketchup chips is not definitive.
Second of all, if many of them are mediocre, then this is hardly a ranking of the 'best', is it?
Third of all, some of those things aren't even chips.

At this point, I'm starting to wonder if they ran down to some corner store in Buffalo and bought those or something, because none of the other words in the list title are true, so why should "Canada's" be.
posted by jacquilynne at 11:19 AM on June 7, 2017


The best ketchips are from Herr's of Pennsylvania.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 11:26 AM on June 7, 2017


We Asked Americans To Taste And Review Canadian Ketchup Chips [Buzzfeed]
"Tastes like a mistake."
posted by Fizz at 11:29 AM on June 7, 2017 [2 favorites]


As a person who is not Canadian, I at first I thought these were crisps/chips for dunking in ketchup... now I want to try that.
posted by Fence at 11:39 AM on June 7, 2017


As a person who is not Canadian, I at first I thought these were crisps/chips for dunking in ketchup... now I want to try that.

This is how I used to eat potato chips, exclusively. Then when I was in high school I would buy Lays Sour Cream & Onion chips at lunch and grab a Philadelphia Cream Cheese packet from the bagel section and then I would proceed to squeeze a little bit of cream cheese on each chip. That was lunch. So healthy.

Now I'm fond of kettle cooked chips of any variety and I tend to be a purist but I don't judge others' preferences.
posted by cooker girl at 11:56 AM on June 7, 2017


I tend to be a purist but I don't judge others' preferences.

When it comes to potato chip flavours. It's ok to judge.

We're all wrong in each other's eyes. Some of us are just more wrong than others.
posted by Fizz at 12:04 PM on June 7, 2017 [3 favorites]


Kettle Brand sriracha flavour are the best ketchup chips.
posted by sfenders at 12:10 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]


My love for flavored chips is well documented, but ketchup is my least favorite major flavor. Sorry. I just had the BLT flavored chips from Lay's they were OK.
posted by jonmc at 12:13 PM on June 7, 2017


I'm glad to see that Herr's ketchup chips didn't make the list.

About 8 years ago I went up to Montreal for the weekend and saw some Herr's brand ketchup chips. I really like ketchup chips but had never heard of this brand before so I bought them to see how they were. An extra point in their favour was that they had the Heinz logo and used their ketchup. On the drive back to Toronto my wife and I opened the bag and started eating them and neither of us liked them. I don't remember how they taste anymore, just that they didn't taste good. We didn't finish the bag and after a couple of weeks ended up throwing it away, this is notable because normally even if I didn't care much for chips I'd still eat some here and there to finish the bag but not this time.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 12:25 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]


A true review of Ketchup chips should include after shots of the tester's fingers.
posted by srboisvert at 12:29 PM on June 7, 2017 [5 favorites]


Storm Chips last year (a mix of ketchup, dill pickle, BBQ and salt and vinegar chips in one bag)

Sounds like their take on All-Dress.


All Dressed showed up at my local Mariano's in Chicago and it had an 'explainer box' on it. It warmed my Canadian heart. For the 30 minutes that the large bag lasted.
posted by srboisvert at 12:34 PM on June 7, 2017 [3 favorites]


In Maine we have Humpty Dumpty that does a nice Ketchup flavour.. they have a Sour Cream & Clam I haven't tried yet but I'm... curious.
posted by mbatch at 12:57 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]


I was off Covered Bridge for a while because of their anti-labour practices but I just looked it up and the union called of the boycott a year ago, so now I will eat their delicious chips again since I want their employees to keep their now better-paying jobs. I will admit to being much more into all-dressed than ketchup though; when I go back to Canada for a visit, I just eat all dressed chips non-stop.
posted by carolr at 1:21 PM on June 7, 2017


President's Choice brand chips is really good for people who are wanting to try more diverse flavours: List of Flavours
Applewood Smoke Bacon
Aged Cheddar and Onion
Sour Cream and Dill
Jamaican Jerk
Poutine
Harissa Hummus
Maple Bacon
Thai Curry
Caramelized Onion & Balsamic Vinegar
Sriracha Flavour
Turkey Stuffing
posted by Fizz at 2:00 PM on June 7, 2017 [3 favorites]


Maple Bacon and Jamaican Jerk are both amazing!
posted by Fizz at 2:00 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]


Next can we do Canadian jalapeno chips, please?

Bearing in mind that the J is silent, Ricky [some NSFW language].
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 2:14 PM on June 7, 2017 [3 favorites]


The Loads of Ketchup hits that point even faster.

Would agree on the minutes-to-tang-overload ratio there. My solution is to buy another bag of a different flavour and switch off when I hit my ketchup tang threshold.

Win win.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 2:15 PM on June 7, 2017 [2 favorites]


ketchup tang threshold

If you need a name for your punk-rock band, you're all set.
posted by Fizz at 2:20 PM on June 7, 2017 [3 favorites]


President's Choice brand chips is really good

This endorsement also extends to pretty much everything President's Choice makes. I'm a devotee. At my local YIG (a Loblaws affiliate) they keep the PC chips in the "regular chip" aisle and I usually decide I want chips and choose a flavour in the earlier "artisinal chips" section (this usually means some kind of Kettle chips and yes sriracha flavoured are excellent but I will eat jalapeno until my tongue burns out of my mouth) so I have tried very few of the PC brand chips.

Sadly, their jalapeno chips aren't so good, though. The best jalapeno chips were once Nalley, though I think that brand only makes chip dips now.
posted by urbanlenny at 2:20 PM on June 7, 2017 [2 favorites]


Fuck these flavours.


Well- that's your opinion, eh?
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:29 PM on June 7, 2017 [3 favorites]


The older I get, the more boring my taste in chips gets; it's regular, lightly salted and (if I'm feeling adventurous) salt and vinegar for me, and that's about it. I don't even really crave Doritos (which I used to eat by the crate) any more. I don't want anything getting in the way of the taste of salt and heavily processed potatoes.
posted by The Card Cheat at 2:31 PM on June 7, 2017


I can still taste the Miss Vickie's Salt & Vinegar that I ate yesterday. I expect the acid burns will heal up by Friday or so. But they're so damned good.
posted by jacquilynne at 2:41 PM on June 7, 2017 [5 favorites]


The Old Dutch ketchup chips are the best (admittedly of a bad lot - ketchup flavour is wretched). I think it's the extra MSG to bolster the chemical spice.
posted by Jessica Savitch's Coke Spoon at 2:47 PM on June 7, 2017


My first ketchup chips were Herrs. In fact the only ketchup chips I've ever eaten are Herrs. I like them, but I'm willing to try others. If I could find them.
posted by Splunge at 3:55 PM on June 7, 2017


Tomorrow, I head up to Canada for a lake-side cottage country wedding. Most of the planning I've done with other guests is around the different chip flavors we'll stocking in our cabin. And then, today, as if to prime me for it: my cousin's gift of two bags of Classic Caesar Kettle chips arrived. And they may be the best ketchup(dish) chips ever. Though I, too, love the ketchup Doritos in all their wrongness.
posted by marylynn at 6:22 PM on June 7, 2017 [2 favorites]


I personally dislike Old Dutch ketchup chips, they taste like sadness. Give me Lay's or give me death, I always say.
posted by selenized at 6:33 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]


Tried Covered Bridge on my last trip to Victoria and they're the best I've found so far. I can get Lays All-Dressed in grocery stores here in Virginia. Fizz is delusional: they are the bomb.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:55 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]


Old Dutch all the way, though I'll admit, most ketchup chips are decent regardless of brand.

In Maine we have Humpty Dumpty that does a nice Ketchup flavour.. they have a Sour Cream & Clam I haven't tried yet but I'm... curious.

What perversion is this?? Ugh, sour cream and clam??

That's what you get when that Old Dutch opens up an American subsidiary, I guess. Full disclosure, I actually love Humpty Dumpty snacks but COME ON, sour cream and clam flavoured chips sound like an abomination.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 10:46 PM on June 7, 2017


Quiet, you fool! My dream of Clamato Chips is that much closer to being reality!
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 10:55 PM on June 7, 2017 [3 favorites]


Clamato Chips

It appears this has been attempted at the tortilla chip level, but maybe only in the US? I've not seen them anywhere in my part of Canada. Not potato chips, though.

Taste: These triangular tortilla chips were supposed to taste like Clamato, which is a bloody Mary mix that includes clam. In fact, the last ingredient of the chips is clam broth.

You know this was written by somebody in the US because a Canadian would likely just say: "Clamato is Caesar mix."
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 6:04 AM on June 8, 2017


That's what you get when that Old Dutch opens up an American subsidiary, I guess.

1. Humpty Dumpty was independent for decades, and was bought out by two other companies before Old Dutch came around to it.
2. Humpty Dumpty does more business in Canada than the US, and always has.
3. Old Dutch is an American company.
posted by Sys Rq at 8:07 AM on June 8, 2017 [1 favorite]


Old Dutch, Pringles and Lays versions are just way too goddamn sweet for me.

There were some kecap manis-flavored chips floating around at one of my local Thai markets for a while, but they stopped carrying them :(
posted by aspersioncast at 9:17 AM on June 8, 2017


Those Kettle Classic Caesar chips taste more like celery salt than anything tomato-y. They're good in their own weird way. I realise now that I also really just wanted a clamato chip. Maybe I'll just mix a bag of Classic Caesar and a bag of Ketchup. Hmmmmmmmmmm this sounds like a good idea.

Also, sour cream and clam actually does sound good.
posted by urbanlenny at 1:10 PM on June 8, 2017


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