‘Nothing is too weird. We consider all requests’
July 29, 2017 8:51 AM Subscribe
Turned on by gremlins? Excited by ketchup or rare stamps? There’s a porn film for that. Inside California’s new growth industry. Jon Ronson on bespoke porn
Fascinating. I have a friend with a "naked women" fetish, now I know what to get him for his birthday.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 9:11 AM on July 29, 2017 [7 favorites]
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 9:11 AM on July 29, 2017 [7 favorites]
Friends of ours made some serious cash doing fully clothed videos of them pushing car accelerators and rubbing balloons on things so hey, why the hell not.
posted by bitter-girl.com at 9:32 AM on July 29, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by bitter-girl.com at 9:32 AM on July 29, 2017 [4 favorites]
Vernon Chatman, the creator of many Adult Swim shows, made the feature film Final Flesh using one of those bespoke porn services. It's pretty strange in that non of the pornographic actors engage in actual sex, instead they read from his demented sci-fi dystopia script.
posted by cazoo at 10:19 AM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by cazoo at 10:19 AM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
Most of the films that were described in the article did not sound graphically sexual (in the sense of nudity, sex acts, etc; they are apparently very sexual for the clients), but I wonder how representative these are of what people request, or if most requests are more recognizably pornographic.
In other words, are these outlier examples that were picked for being outlandish and to make a good article (which it very much was)? Or are these actually representative for this niche of the industry?
posted by Dip Flash at 10:20 AM on July 29, 2017 [3 favorites]
In other words, are these outlier examples that were picked for being outlandish and to make a good article (which it very much was)? Or are these actually representative for this niche of the industry?
posted by Dip Flash at 10:20 AM on July 29, 2017 [3 favorites]
Well, the thing is as you get more recognizably pornographic then there's less need for a bespoke service. For instance: if you get off on ladies in their underwear punching balloons into the air (a completely hypothetical fetish I assure you) then you might need a bespoke service; if you get off on ladies doing sex to each other while balloons are nearby then chances are there is already a video that suits your needs.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 10:33 AM on July 29, 2017 [5 favorites]
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 10:33 AM on July 29, 2017 [5 favorites]
This is how SWAP.avi happens.
If you do not know what that is, remain that way.
posted by delfin at 10:35 AM on July 29, 2017 [4 favorites]
If you do not know what that is, remain that way.
posted by delfin at 10:35 AM on July 29, 2017 [4 favorites]
The internet may be tearing apart some communities, but it is bringing others together.
It gives me a small measure of comfort to recall that the porn industry tends to predict the future of the Internet.
posted by suetanvil at 10:36 AM on July 29, 2017 [6 favorites]
It gives me a small measure of comfort to recall that the porn industry tends to predict the future of the Internet.
posted by suetanvil at 10:36 AM on July 29, 2017 [6 favorites]
I think I remember hearing about a pre-internet version of this on one of those "Real Sex" shows. They had some dude who really loved old 50's sci-fi movies and he got porn about being kidnapped by alien women or something.
posted by jonmc at 11:14 AM on July 29, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by jonmc at 11:14 AM on July 29, 2017 [1 favorite]
I read somewhere that people have used online porn to raise their profile so they could charge higher prices for in person sex services. Become a porn star and charge thousands per night. There is always money in sex.
posted by Bee'sWing at 11:22 AM on July 29, 2017
posted by Bee'sWing at 11:22 AM on July 29, 2017
I'ts mentioned at the tail-end of the podcast, but really you should listen to Ronson's 6-hour podcast on the subject on Audible. I'm half-way through and it's quite excellent.
posted by dobbs at 11:33 AM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by dobbs at 11:33 AM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
Seconding hippybear's recommendation of that This American Life episode. The stories are ones included in the Guardian article (which is very good!) but there is something very moving about the audio. I, too, was taken by surprise at the end of it, and then was in the peculiar position of suddenly becoming tearful while walking the dog and listening to a TAL podcast about bespoke porn.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 12:56 PM on July 29, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 12:56 PM on July 29, 2017 [1 favorite]
Jimmy: They were videos intended to titillate the senses.
Cop 1: Okay, so, porn.
Jimmy: Not -- no, not as such. Technically they would be categorized as fetish videos, but nothing illegal. Just a man, a fully clothed man, I might add, just... all by himself. Just, just, Mr. Wermold, fully clothed, uh. Yeah. So.
Cop 1: All right, so. Fully clothed. Mr. Wermold. By himself. Doing what?
Cop 2: Yeah, come on man, what?
Jimmy: Squat cobbler.
Cop 1: What's a squat cobbler?
Jimmy: Squat cobbler. You know what squat cobbler is.
Cop 1: No, I don't know what a squat cobbler is.
Cop 2: No, me neither, what is it?
Jimmy: What -- you two guys are cops? Hoboken squat cobbler! Full moon moon pie! Boston cream splat! ....Seriously? Simple Simon the ass man! Dutch apple ass! Guys, am I not speaking English here?
Cop 1: What the hell is a squat cobbler?
posted by Vic Morrow's Personal Vietnam at 2:06 PM on July 29, 2017 [9 favorites]
Cop 1: Okay, so, porn.
Jimmy: Not -- no, not as such. Technically they would be categorized as fetish videos, but nothing illegal. Just a man, a fully clothed man, I might add, just... all by himself. Just, just, Mr. Wermold, fully clothed, uh. Yeah. So.
Cop 1: All right, so. Fully clothed. Mr. Wermold. By himself. Doing what?
Cop 2: Yeah, come on man, what?
Jimmy: Squat cobbler.
Cop 1: What's a squat cobbler?
Jimmy: Squat cobbler. You know what squat cobbler is.
Cop 1: No, I don't know what a squat cobbler is.
Cop 2: No, me neither, what is it?
Jimmy: What -- you two guys are cops? Hoboken squat cobbler! Full moon moon pie! Boston cream splat! ....Seriously? Simple Simon the ass man! Dutch apple ass! Guys, am I not speaking English here?
Cop 1: What the hell is a squat cobbler?
posted by Vic Morrow's Personal Vietnam at 2:06 PM on July 29, 2017 [9 favorites]
This is how SWAP.avi happens.
Welp, there's some memories that could've stayed buried.
posted by Pope Guilty at 3:55 PM on July 29, 2017 [4 favorites]
Welp, there's some memories that could've stayed buried.
posted by Pope Guilty at 3:55 PM on July 29, 2017 [4 favorites]
About 13 years ago, I worked as a phone sex operator for a brief while as a personal experiment. Out of all the calls, the one I remember most was the one where the caller asked me to describe being a horse eating an apple. Something tells me that guy would really dig this new industry.
posted by RedEmma at 4:19 PM on July 29, 2017 [8 favorites]
posted by RedEmma at 4:19 PM on July 29, 2017 [8 favorites]
> This is how SWAP.avi happens.
Welp, there's some memories that could've stayed buried.
On the internet, everything eventually comes back up.
posted by Blue Jello Elf at 6:37 PM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
Welp, there's some memories that could've stayed buried.
On the internet, everything eventually comes back up.
posted by Blue Jello Elf at 6:37 PM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
This is a weirdly sweet article!
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:20 PM on July 29, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:20 PM on July 29, 2017 [1 favorite]
"Excited by ketchup on rare stamps"? Different strokes and all, I guess...
Oh, I read that wrong.
posted by Carouselle at 9:36 PM on July 29, 2017
Oh, I read that wrong.
posted by Carouselle at 9:36 PM on July 29, 2017
If there is one thing I learnt growing up on the internet, it is that if someone tells you not to look up a piece of media they Justin referred to, don't look it up.
I am curious as to what particular horror is contained beneath the inoculous filename of SWAP.AVI. But I will never learn its secrets. And I am fine with this.
posted by egypturnash at 10:20 PM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
I am curious as to what particular horror is contained beneath the inoculous filename of SWAP.AVI. But I will never learn its secrets. And I am fine with this.
posted by egypturnash at 10:20 PM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
A hint: it is by the same people who blessed the world with 2 Girls 1 Cup. No less a sleaze connoisseur than Jim Norton referred to SWAP as "2 Girls No God."
posted by delfin at 8:49 AM on July 30, 2017
posted by delfin at 8:49 AM on July 30, 2017
I love Ronson's work. His style of journalism is very personal yet still meticulous. The Psychopath Test is worth a read (or for the short version you can see his TED talk)
posted by ProfConfused at 9:12 AM on July 30, 2017
posted by ProfConfused at 9:12 AM on July 30, 2017
The documentary Tickled is recommended for a weird, sad, mystifying and generally head-screwing trip into similar areas.
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 8:39 AM on August 2, 2017
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 8:39 AM on August 2, 2017
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posted by hippybear at 8:57 AM on July 29, 2017 [5 favorites]