"Good morning! It is time for ice cream."
September 9, 2017 8:39 PM Subscribe
eat the ice cream eat the ice cream eat the ice cream eat the ice cream eat the ice cream eat the ice cream eat̸ ̴the̛ ̶i͠ce ̡c҉r̨e͝am ̕ea͢t t͟he͢ ice c̢ream͜ ̶e̶át ҉th͘e íce ̀c͡re̴am ęat t͏he͢ ̛i͏c̸e͝ cr̷e͞am e̸a̢t͟ t͞he͘ i̶c͞e̴ ͞crea͢m ͞e͜at̡ th͞e ̴i̶ce̷ ćre͢a͠m̷ ̷eat͠ ̸the ic̴e cr̨eám̨ ̀eąt͝ t͞h̨e҉ ̡i̛c҉e ͘çr͢e̶am ̗̲̤̖̜́e̴̫a͉͙̭̥͕t ̴̬̰̠̗͇̙t̜̺͈̹̰̘̪́h͙͈͟e̱͔̬̻ͅ ̵͓̩̼ic͎̣̮̹̤e͚͇͈̦̥͖ ̱̯̞c̦̝̖̯͎r̻͈͎e͈̬͎̫̫a̦͔̦̗̮̻m̞ ̹̱͟e̗̙̙̩̮a̯̜̰ͅț̖̦͟ ̟̪̞t̥̲̕h͕̕e̘ i̴͙c̗̭͖̠̤̖e̺̩̪̺ ͍̝͍̝͞c̘̫̮̣̰r̳̬͕̖̩ȩ͈̩a̳̯̜̟̯̖m̜͍ ̸ea̠̩͖̖t͓̪ ͠t̬̤̲̮͕̼͢h͕͕̳͉̙ẹ͢ ̶̫͈̱͉i̵̦̮͎͕̹̟c̟̙̦̗͓̘̺͝e̺̩̯̹̕ ̺̠̤͜c҉͕͕̠̫̘̖̤r̖̝͍͍̣̹ḙ͚͎a̮m̬̮͍͉̻̜ ̸ea̠̩͖̖t͓̪ ͠t̬̤̲̮͕̼͢h͕͕̳͉̙ẹ͢ ̶̫͈̱͉i̵̦̮͎͕̹̟c̟̙̦̗͓̘̺͝e̺̩̯̹̕ ̺̠̤͜c҉͕͕̠̫̘̖̤r̖̝͍͍̣̹ḙ͚͎a̮m̬̮͍͉̻̜
Well that's bizarre.
posted by KleenexMakesaVeryGoodHat at 8:44 PM on September 9, 2017
posted by KleenexMakesaVeryGoodHat at 8:44 PM on September 9, 2017
Well, that's a brand of ice cream I won't be buying.
posted by hippybear at 8:50 PM on September 9, 2017 [9 favorites]
posted by hippybear at 8:50 PM on September 9, 2017 [9 favorites]
Finally, the bit that makes 2001: A Space Odyssey make sense.
posted by Behemoth at 8:51 PM on September 9, 2017 [15 favorites]
posted by Behemoth at 8:51 PM on September 9, 2017 [15 favorites]
Even more disturbing, from the Youtube sidebar: Japanese Donald 'Tarump' Commercial 2016
posted by growabrain at 8:55 PM on September 9, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by growabrain at 8:55 PM on September 9, 2017 [4 favorites]
Well, that's a brand of ice cream I won't be buying.
They don't sell ice cream, they sell ...something different.
posted by leotrotsky at 8:58 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
They don't sell ice cream, they sell ...something different.
posted by leotrotsky at 8:58 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
High protein ice cream.
posted by Artw at 8:59 PM on September 9, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by Artw at 8:59 PM on September 9, 2017 [1 favorite]
The Japanese Donald 'Tarump' Commercial was made by the same video mutant, who also did a Clinton spot with a Hillary lookalike acting out memes. "Mike Diva" is one 'creative' whose work I will be seriously avoiding from now on.
posted by oneswellfoop at 9:02 PM on September 9, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by oneswellfoop at 9:02 PM on September 9, 2017 [1 favorite]
Metafilter: everyone you love is gone. Eat the ice cream.
posted by killdevil at 9:03 PM on September 9, 2017 [42 favorites]
posted by killdevil at 9:03 PM on September 9, 2017 [42 favorites]
Somebody left a couple cartons of this stuff at my house and it was inedible. The commercial is probably funny if you're young enough to believe that old people aren't real, but it just seemed horrible to me.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 9:14 PM on September 9, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by Sing Or Swim at 9:14 PM on September 9, 2017 [4 favorites]
Ah, what luck! I just purchased a small container of vanilla ice cream an hour ago! I will now eat that ice cream. Sadly, I'll have to serve it to myself whilst sitting in my drab apartment. Ice cream in a completely sterile industrial white room delivered by my robot servant would undoubtedly be even more delicious.
posted by gusottertrout at 9:20 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by gusottertrout at 9:20 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
This does not make me want to buy their product (I don't want to call it ice cream because it does not seem very much like ice cream).
posted by rtha at 9:23 PM on September 9, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by rtha at 9:23 PM on September 9, 2017 [3 favorites]
Yeah the actual product seems like garbage but the ad is bizarre and funny, also his LONEWOLF fake ad is the perfect distillation of Saturday morning TV in the late '80s.
posted by drinkyclown at 9:29 PM on September 9, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by drinkyclown at 9:29 PM on September 9, 2017 [3 favorites]
Johnny Wallflower, we need to talk...
posted by It's Never Lurgi at 9:30 PM on September 9, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by It's Never Lurgi at 9:30 PM on September 9, 2017 [3 favorites]
It's Never Lurgi: invitations to talk do no good. talking does no good. he's escalating now, and we need an elite team of 5 misfits to confront him directly or else a lone fish out of water hero who can take him down behind the scenes. We have no other choices.
posted by hippybear at 9:35 PM on September 9, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by hippybear at 9:35 PM on September 9, 2017 [4 favorites]
This is amazing. I have no inclination to buy anything based on it but I love it.
posted by 1adam12 at 9:37 PM on September 9, 2017 [5 favorites]
posted by 1adam12 at 9:37 PM on September 9, 2017 [5 favorites]
Hippybear: What we need is eight Jan Michael Vincents, though they'll have to cover 16 quadrants.
I for one enjoy this trend of commercials that don't actively try to sell the product, but rather attempt to create space in your mind for the product through surreality or horror. Skittles has perfected this technique, with its older prehensile beard commercial and its more recent commercial equating its product to a communicable disease.
(Disclaimer: I still don't eat Skittles, but if I'm going to have to watch ads, I'd rather they be funny.)
posted by ejs at 9:47 PM on September 9, 2017 [8 favorites]
I for one enjoy this trend of commercials that don't actively try to sell the product, but rather attempt to create space in your mind for the product through surreality or horror. Skittles has perfected this technique, with its older prehensile beard commercial and its more recent commercial equating its product to a communicable disease.
(Disclaimer: I still don't eat Skittles, but if I'm going to have to watch ads, I'd rather they be funny.)
posted by ejs at 9:47 PM on September 9, 2017 [8 favorites]
Pepsi Blue
P̶e̶p̶s̶i̶ Halo Top Blue
P̶e̶p̶s̶i̶ ̶Halo Top B̶l̶u̶e̶ Professional White
Seriously though, I love this.
posted by BrotherCaine at 10:02 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
P̶e̶p̶s̶i̶ Halo Top Blue
P̶e̶p̶s̶i̶ ̶Halo Top B̶l̶u̶e̶ Professional White
Seriously though, I love this.
posted by BrotherCaine at 10:02 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
This is the first time a commercial has taken a product I already liked and made me like it less, in a very scary way.
posted by Room 641-A at 10:08 PM on September 9, 2017 [11 favorites]
posted by Room 641-A at 10:08 PM on September 9, 2017 [11 favorites]
Don't get me wrong, I think the commercial is weirdly fun, but it also seems really off brand.
posted by Room 641-A at 10:10 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Room 641-A at 10:10 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
Don Draper started writing strange copy in his 90s.
posted by Emily's Fist at 11:10 PM on September 9, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by Emily's Fist at 11:10 PM on September 9, 2017 [3 favorites]
Don't get me wrong, I think the commercial is weirdly fun, but it also seems really off brand.
it's like one of those weird show off ads that ad companies do unprompted as a demo, only real?
posted by Artw at 11:13 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
it's like one of those weird show off ads that ad companies do unprompted as a demo, only real?
posted by Artw at 11:13 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
This does not make me want to buy their product...
Totally agreed, but as much as I'd like to, we can't really criticize them for that. Sure, that used to be the singular goal of commercials, but then the advertising industry learned a new word—"viral"—and suddenly everything changed and now there's a decision: do we make a commercial that sells the product, or do we make a commercial that can win a water-cooler pageant?
This is the latter. It's a Super Bowl commercial. I think it takes less skill than writing a commercial that genuinely sells the product, but I have to admit this commercial succeeds at what it's trying to do. Here we all are, talking about it. It's like Fuller House being super cheesy: "Congratulations, creators. You accomplished your goal."
posted by cribcage at 11:21 PM on September 9, 2017
Totally agreed, but as much as I'd like to, we can't really criticize them for that. Sure, that used to be the singular goal of commercials, but then the advertising industry learned a new word—"viral"—and suddenly everything changed and now there's a decision: do we make a commercial that sells the product, or do we make a commercial that can win a water-cooler pageant?
This is the latter. It's a Super Bowl commercial. I think it takes less skill than writing a commercial that genuinely sells the product, but I have to admit this commercial succeeds at what it's trying to do. Here we all are, talking about it. It's like Fuller House being super cheesy: "Congratulations, creators. You accomplished your goal."
posted by cribcage at 11:21 PM on September 9, 2017
Italian breakfast cake producer Motta has also been infected with the viral virus.
posted by aqsakal at 11:33 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by aqsakal at 11:33 PM on September 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
Aww it gives me a lot of warm fuzzies to see a project highlighted on metafilter that was worked on by someone I'm close to. (This person was part of a studio contracted to build the robot, not someone with any creative direction, so I can't answer any of THOSE questions for you...)
posted by gloriouslyincandescent at 1:51 AM on September 10, 2017 [6 favorites]
posted by gloriouslyincandescent at 1:51 AM on September 10, 2017 [6 favorites]
I recently tried the Enlighten brand and liked it more than Halo Top. First of all, they have a coffee flavor, but it was also definitely creamier. I don't like melty ice cream and the Halo Top chocolate is like a slightly creamier fudgesicle, so I'm fine with that, but Enlighten's texture is probably more appealing to people. (I was bothered more by the cloying sweetness of other Halo Top flavors.)
posted by Room 641-A at 2:07 AM on September 10, 2017
posted by Room 641-A at 2:07 AM on September 10, 2017
I scream - you scream - we all scream for ice cream
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 2:52 AM on September 10, 2017
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 2:52 AM on September 10, 2017
Well, that's a brand of ice cream I won't be buying.
posted by hippybear at 10:50 PM on September 9 [4 favorites +] [!]
This does not make me want to buy their product (I don't want to call it ice cream because it does not seem very much like ice cream).
posted by rtha at 11:23 PM on September 9 [1 favorite +] [!]
The error is that you think you have a choice.
Eat the ice cream!
posted by Samizdata at 3:17 AM on September 10, 2017 [18 favorites]
posted by hippybear at 10:50 PM on September 9 [4 favorites +] [!]
This does not make me want to buy their product (I don't want to call it ice cream because it does not seem very much like ice cream).
posted by rtha at 11:23 PM on September 9 [1 favorite +] [!]
The error is that you think you have a choice.
Eat the ice cream!
posted by Samizdata at 3:17 AM on September 10, 2017 [18 favorites]
But I'm lactose intolerant.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 4:19 AM on September 10, 2017
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 4:19 AM on September 10, 2017
'I have no mouth but I must scream... for ice cream'
posted by rock swoon has no past at 4:49 AM on September 10, 2017 [30 favorites]
posted by rock swoon has no past at 4:49 AM on September 10, 2017 [30 favorites]
I bought a pint of this stuff at a super-fancy grocery store because I really wanted ice cream, and didn't feel like paying $8 for a pint. This seemed more reasonably priced, in the Ben & Jerry's range, so I went with it, despite the little tub seeming oddly light.
I finished the whole pint within 20 minutes of getting home--not because it was so good, but because it was peculiarly unsatisfying. It was as though someone had taken a very decent ice cream, diluted it with milk, and then whipped so much air into it that it was just short of an ice cream-scented air. It was like wanting a Jolly Rancher and getting Jolly Rancher-flavored cotton candy instead. It's a remarkable food achievement in its own right, but far from the messy, biological experience of food.
I think the ad captures this nicely.
posted by pykrete jungle at 5:45 AM on September 10, 2017 [6 favorites]
I finished the whole pint within 20 minutes of getting home--not because it was so good, but because it was peculiarly unsatisfying. It was as though someone had taken a very decent ice cream, diluted it with milk, and then whipped so much air into it that it was just short of an ice cream-scented air. It was like wanting a Jolly Rancher and getting Jolly Rancher-flavored cotton candy instead. It's a remarkable food achievement in its own right, but far from the messy, biological experience of food.
I think the ad captures this nicely.
posted by pykrete jungle at 5:45 AM on September 10, 2017 [6 favorites]
ICE CREAM - APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD
ICE CREAM - APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD
ICE CREAM - APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD
posted by radwolf76 at 6:22 AM on September 10, 2017 [8 favorites]
ICE CREAM - APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD
ICE CREAM - APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD
posted by radwolf76 at 6:22 AM on September 10, 2017 [8 favorites]
I was thinking,"Ok, I'm middle aged but I do not feel disturbed or confused. I am savvy enough realize that this is an ad for a video game because I can remember there was one called Halo, so there must be a new version available and this is being greatly enjoyed by the people who are interested in that sort of thing..."
posted by bonobothegreat at 6:37 AM on September 10, 2017
posted by bonobothegreat at 6:37 AM on September 10, 2017
My god... it's full of nuts.
posted by rock swoon has no past at 6:44 AM on September 10, 2017 [7 favorites]
posted by rock swoon has no past at 6:44 AM on September 10, 2017 [7 favorites]
I've been told it was made for movie theaters to show before horror movies. I don't know if it's true, but it sort of makes sense.
Alternate theory: disgruntled employee. Possibly a conspiracy of disgruntled employees.
posted by Nancy Lebovitz at 7:08 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
Alternate theory: disgruntled employee. Possibly a conspiracy of disgruntled employees.
posted by Nancy Lebovitz at 7:08 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
Here's the background music: halo top ice cream jingle
posted by wallabear at 7:13 AM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by wallabear at 7:13 AM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
Besides Kubrick's 2001, another possible inspiration: The Terrible Secret Of Space.
posted by King Sky Prawn at 7:13 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by King Sky Prawn at 7:13 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
I recently tried the Enlighten brand and liked it more than Halo Top.
Opposite experience here. Halo Top captures the mouthfeel of ice cream far better than Arctic Zero, but it's not quite thick enough. Enlightened, OTOH, is weird and gummy, like diluted fondant. The caramel flavor is good, but that texture, yuck.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 8:06 AM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
Opposite experience here. Halo Top captures the mouthfeel of ice cream far better than Arctic Zero, but it's not quite thick enough. Enlightened, OTOH, is weird and gummy, like diluted fondant. The caramel flavor is good, but that texture, yuck.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 8:06 AM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
I think user schroedinger would have done well to have cross posted their comment referencing little baby's ice cream into this thread.
posted by klarck at 8:11 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by klarck at 8:11 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
I've been told it was made for movie theaters to show before horror movies.
Anecdotal evidence: this was played before the film when I went to see It yesterday. It did not make me want to buy ice cream, but it did make me think "I would definitely watch a movie about this terrible ice cream robot future."
posted by darchildre at 8:35 AM on September 10, 2017 [10 favorites]
Anecdotal evidence: this was played before the film when I went to see It yesterday. It did not make me want to buy ice cream, but it did make me think "I would definitely watch a movie about this terrible ice cream robot future."
posted by darchildre at 8:35 AM on September 10, 2017 [10 favorites]
Opposite experience here. Halo Top captures the mouthfeel of ice cream far better than Arctic Zero, but it's not quite thick enough. Enlightened, OTOH, is weird and gummy, like diluted fondant
Hmm, I wonder if it's because I don't wait to let it soften. (The Halo Top is so solid I cut it into cubes. I'm... weird.)
Not about ice cream, but here is another vaguely menacing commercial I saw the other day.
posted by Room 641-A at 8:47 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
Hmm, I wonder if it's because I don't wait to let it soften. (The Halo Top is so solid I cut it into cubes. I'm... weird.)
Not about ice cream, but here is another vaguely menacing commercial I saw the other day.
posted by Room 641-A at 8:47 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
I have eaten
the ice cream
that was in
the robot
and which
it was probably
saving
for David
Forgive me
everyone I loved
I have no mouth
and must scream
posted by Quindar Beep at 9:06 AM on September 10, 2017 [25 favorites]
the ice cream
that was in
the robot
and which
it was probably
saving
for David
Forgive me
everyone I loved
I have no mouth
and must scream
posted by Quindar Beep at 9:06 AM on September 10, 2017 [25 favorites]
Halo Top seems to imply ice cream; the label just says Pint. Ingredients for the pistachio flavor: Milk and cream, eggs, erythritol, prebiotic fiber, milk protein concentrate, organic cane sugar, vegetable glycerin, natural plant extract (for color), sea salt, natural flavors, organic carob gum, organic guar gum, organic stevia.
Erythritol is an alcohol-based sweetener.
I prefer my frozen dessert without guar gum. It's not bad for you, as far as I know, I just don't care for the texture.
posted by theora55 at 9:58 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
Erythritol is an alcohol-based sweetener.
I prefer my frozen dessert without guar gum. It's not bad for you, as far as I know, I just don't care for the texture.
posted by theora55 at 9:58 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
My first thought, when I saw this, was that someone had deeply desired to emulate the viral success of the Little Baby's ad campaigns of 2012.
My second thought was that I really don't want to ever end up in a nursing home staffed by robots.
At no point did I want the ice cream. SOYLENT CREAM IS PEOPLE.
posted by panglos at 10:04 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
My second thought was that I really don't want to ever end up in a nursing home staffed by robots.
At no point did I want the ice cream. SOYLENT CREAM IS PEOPLE.
posted by panglos at 10:04 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
But I'm lactose intolerant.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 6:19 AM on September 10 [+] [!]
GOTO Encouragement
:Encouragement
SAY Eat the ice creeam!
posted by Samizdata at 10:13 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 6:19 AM on September 10 [+] [!]
GOTO Encouragement
:Encouragement
SAY Eat the ice creeam!
posted by Samizdata at 10:13 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
You are all so smart and brave for not wanting to buy the ice cream after watching this commercial. #resist
posted by speicus at 10:38 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by speicus at 10:38 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
I absolutely loathe Stevia and can detect it in anything. I will throw away something with prejudice that I mistakenly bought that has Stevia as an ingredient. I have only tried the Halo Top Chocolate (before the Stevia revelation) and it is surprisingly not Stevia sweet. I would call it any adequate ice cream replacement if you want to eat an entire pint for dinner and not feel any guilt whatsoever.
posted by nikitabot at 10:51 AM on September 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by nikitabot at 10:51 AM on September 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
if you're eating an entire pint of ANYTHING and not feeling any remorse, you need to examine your diet planning skills critically.
posted by hippybear at 10:54 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by hippybear at 10:54 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
Except beer. Those come in pints.
posted by hippybear at 10:54 AM on September 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by hippybear at 10:54 AM on September 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
Imagine a pint of steak or broccoli or even mashed potatoes. But beer is fine.
posted by hippybear at 10:55 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by hippybear at 10:55 AM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
I absolutely loathe Stevia and can detect it in anything. I will throw away something with prejudice that I mistakenly bought that has Stevia as an ingredient. I have only tried the Halo Top Chocolate (before the Stevia revelation) and it is surprisingly not Stevia sweet. I would call it any adequate ice cream replacement if you want to eat an entire pint for dinner and not feel any guilt whatsoever.
Whoa, another Setvia hater here and I had no idea.
But yes, this isn't meant to be ice cream, it's a compromise, and not the worst one. The Red Velevt is also good if you like the chocolate one. People who buy it know it's not ice cream. They know where to get ice cream (it's the next shelf over.) You know what else is good if you're trying to avoid carbs? A pint of whipped cream with a touch if your favorite sweetener. That's probably not something you should eat on the regular, though.
I think a lot depends on how much you like ice cream to begin with. I can mostly take it or leave it, so I'm not that discriminating.
posted by Room 641-A at 11:15 AM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
Whoa, another Setvia hater here and I had no idea.
But yes, this isn't meant to be ice cream, it's a compromise, and not the worst one. The Red Velevt is also good if you like the chocolate one. People who buy it know it's not ice cream. They know where to get ice cream (it's the next shelf over.) You know what else is good if you're trying to avoid carbs? A pint of whipped cream with a touch if your favorite sweetener. That's probably not something you should eat on the regular, though.
I think a lot depends on how much you like ice cream to begin with. I can mostly take it or leave it, so I'm not that discriminating.
posted by Room 641-A at 11:15 AM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
The Lemon Cake flavor is divine. Probably one of my favorite desserts.
posted by biscotti at 11:29 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by biscotti at 11:29 AM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
I like the chocolate, and there's a pint of peanut butter cup Halo Top in the freezer just waiting for me to get back on keto tomorrow.
tl;dr - i eat the "ice cream"
posted by catlet at 11:37 AM on September 10, 2017
tl;dr - i eat the "ice cream"
posted by catlet at 11:37 AM on September 10, 2017
I know some folks who rave about this brand, but I bought some and the whole family hated it. Even the cats wouldn't touch it.
posted by mogget at 1:53 PM on September 10, 2017
posted by mogget at 1:53 PM on September 10, 2017
Beautiful post formatting, btw, Mr. Wallflower.
posted by Room 641-A at 2:20 PM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Room 641-A at 2:20 PM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
Halo Top is actually pretty good ice cream for being so low in carbs.
posted by turbid dahlia at 2:44 PM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by turbid dahlia at 2:44 PM on September 10, 2017 [2 favorites]
For the record, I will eat a pint of broccoli at the drop of a hat. I adore broccoli.
posted by spinifex23 at 3:51 PM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by spinifex23 at 3:51 PM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
My local soft serve place just introduced their pumpkin flavor, made with real pumpkin, and I actually spaced out for a moment eating a sample. It was fucking divine. I could get it swirled with a maple flavor, which was also heavenly. I decided I didn't want to dilute my pumpkin experience.
I told the next person in line to try the pumpkin. She left with the pumpkin.
posted by sutt at 4:04 PM on September 10, 2017
I told the next person in line to try the pumpkin. She left with the pumpkin.
posted by sutt at 4:04 PM on September 10, 2017
God, this ad disturbs me. In the Trump threads, there is talk of "dead-eyed" conservatives, and rightly so. It seems like a thing: people, politicians, who mouth platitudes that suggest an attachment to some kind of Good, some Christian center of value, perhaps. Yet you see no real sign of it in their emotions or their behaviors. Asked to imagine what people who had no soul might look like, one might choose from a number of current conservative politicians and ideologues, described, in what I believe is a sincerely felt way, as "dead-eyed".
But the left has its dead-eyed branch, too, and this ad is a product of it. It is reaching deep into the overfed corpse of postmodernism, of irony as a center of (non-)meaning. What kind of marketer would want to associate their customer's brand with a void? This advertisement can only communicate one ("positive") message to a potential buyer, and it seems to be "neither of us share a reference point or a value, or maybe we just don't 'care', and ain't we sophisticated for understanding this subtext, lol."
I think most disturbingly of all, the robot, standing in appropriately for the dead-eyed ironist, clearly acts in a way that, if it were human, would be exploitative and abusive. The senior-aged woman, whose depiction is fraught with stereotypes, is played for dead-eyed laughs, specifically her protestations. She says, emotionally, "I don't want any more." "Get that away from me." This is fucking humorous?
The ad's shitty messages are absolutely real, and lots of people sense that these messages come from a place that is also the source of the attack on conservative values (perceived or otherwise). If you believe that's only "perceived", you have to account for the ad and the culture that spawned it, which is pretty clearly attacking something, even the concept of positive value itself. Dead-eyed leftist ironic detachment has been a big source of fuel for people who are trying to figure out what to value, and an even bigger source of fuel for people who believe their values are under attack.
DF Wallace had some insightful stuff to say about the destructiveness of irony, though I find it hard to believe no one talked about it before him, I just don't know.
posted by sylvanshine at 4:55 PM on September 10, 2017 [5 favorites]
But the left has its dead-eyed branch, too, and this ad is a product of it. It is reaching deep into the overfed corpse of postmodernism, of irony as a center of (non-)meaning. What kind of marketer would want to associate their customer's brand with a void? This advertisement can only communicate one ("positive") message to a potential buyer, and it seems to be "neither of us share a reference point or a value, or maybe we just don't 'care', and ain't we sophisticated for understanding this subtext, lol."
I think most disturbingly of all, the robot, standing in appropriately for the dead-eyed ironist, clearly acts in a way that, if it were human, would be exploitative and abusive. The senior-aged woman, whose depiction is fraught with stereotypes, is played for dead-eyed laughs, specifically her protestations. She says, emotionally, "I don't want any more." "Get that away from me." This is fucking humorous?
The ad's shitty messages are absolutely real, and lots of people sense that these messages come from a place that is also the source of the attack on conservative values (perceived or otherwise). If you believe that's only "perceived", you have to account for the ad and the culture that spawned it, which is pretty clearly attacking something, even the concept of positive value itself. Dead-eyed leftist ironic detachment has been a big source of fuel for people who are trying to figure out what to value, and an even bigger source of fuel for people who believe their values are under attack.
DF Wallace had some insightful stuff to say about the destructiveness of irony, though I find it hard to believe no one talked about it before him, I just don't know.
posted by sylvanshine at 4:55 PM on September 10, 2017 [5 favorites]
My cousin consumes mass quantities of Halo Top. Apparently it is very low in Weight Watchers points. I do not think I will share this video with her as I desire her continued good will.
posted by The Ardship of Cambry at 5:09 PM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by The Ardship of Cambry at 5:09 PM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
The Halo Top is so solid I cut it into cubes.
I have two words for you: micro wave.
Beautiful post formatting, btw
Thanks I just copied it from the YouTube description tho
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 5:24 PM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
I have two words for you: micro wave.
Beautiful post formatting, btw
Thanks I just copied it from the YouTube description tho
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 5:24 PM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
Metafilter: But the left has its dead-eyed branch, too.
posted by lalochezia at 5:43 PM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by lalochezia at 5:43 PM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
God, this ad disturbs me.
oh man you won't liek a lot of modern comedy then
i mean dfw was sincere but sincerity only gets you so far with the existential horror, you dig?
when you look into the void, sometimes,
u haz to piss in the void wiv a big "fuck you void have some mandatory pseudo ice cream"
posted by lalochezia at 5:45 PM on September 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
I have two words for you: micro wave
Is is something I'd need a microwave to understand?
But no, that's the point, I cut them because I don't want them to be soft!
The senior-aged woman, whose depiction is fraught with stereotypes, is played for dead-eyed laughs, specifically her protestations. She says, emotionally, "I don't want any more." "Get that away from me." This is fucking humorous?
I actually thought the line "Where's Steven?" was weirdly cruel and made me wonder how many really senior people the admakers know.
posted by Room 641-A at 5:53 PM on September 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
Is is something I'd need a microwave to understand?
But no, that's the point, I cut them because I don't want them to be soft!
The senior-aged woman, whose depiction is fraught with stereotypes, is played for dead-eyed laughs, specifically her protestations. She says, emotionally, "I don't want any more." "Get that away from me." This is fucking humorous?
I actually thought the line "Where's Steven?" was weirdly cruel and made me wonder how many really senior people the admakers know.
posted by Room 641-A at 5:53 PM on September 10, 2017 [4 favorites]
It seems like the message of most advertising now is not "buy this thing" but "this thing exists" and I guess it worked because I did not know about this thing and now as a result of this thread I know all about this thing. In the end it doesn't matter whether you're pleased or disgusted as long as you're talking about it.
posted by speicus at 7:21 PM on September 10, 2017
posted by speicus at 7:21 PM on September 10, 2017
Roko's ice cream basilisk.
posted by Ogre Lawless at 10:49 PM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by Ogre Lawless at 10:49 PM on September 10, 2017 [3 favorites]
I actually thought the line "Where's Steven?" was weirdly cruel
I believe the line is "Where's David?" which can be read as part of the overall reference to 2001 A Space Odyssey where the lead character was David Bowman. The movie also featured a "helpful" computer and white room where David was shown to have grown very old before the revelation of the Starchild. This commercial is riffing on that.
Beyond that, while I certainly can appreciate why some people feel this crosses a line, I think it's worth noting that story commercials as a whole are usually based off some questionable values even when they are "positive". I mean insinuating beauty, friends, happiness from a purchased product is inherently problematic on some level, so if one sees this commercial as part of the history of the format and reacting to it then it can perhaps carry a different message or "feel" than as a stand alone story.
It definitely isn't the only unusual ad for ice cream out there, some like the Little Baby's Ice Cream commercials are also kinda disturbing.
Some are odd and epic, like this Indo Ice Cream Commercial
Some lean heavily towards the sexist tip, while some don't seem to lean quite so hard by being so commonplace in their sexism. (Seemingly the usual standard for Magnum Ice Cream)
Some rely on the incongruity of old people acting improbably, a popular "comedic" trope reliant on seeing old people as other in its way
While many of the most typical seem to just make use of children or reactions to children to sell their product, something one might find a bit disturbing in itself.
None of that is to deny the people their feelings on the FPP, but to suggest that the conventions are themselves often questionable so making something that goes against them can feel even more so, even if it may not be all that different at its core.
posted by gusottertrout at 11:39 PM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
I believe the line is "Where's David?" which can be read as part of the overall reference to 2001 A Space Odyssey where the lead character was David Bowman. The movie also featured a "helpful" computer and white room where David was shown to have grown very old before the revelation of the Starchild. This commercial is riffing on that.
Beyond that, while I certainly can appreciate why some people feel this crosses a line, I think it's worth noting that story commercials as a whole are usually based off some questionable values even when they are "positive". I mean insinuating beauty, friends, happiness from a purchased product is inherently problematic on some level, so if one sees this commercial as part of the history of the format and reacting to it then it can perhaps carry a different message or "feel" than as a stand alone story.
It definitely isn't the only unusual ad for ice cream out there, some like the Little Baby's Ice Cream commercials are also kinda disturbing.
Some are odd and epic, like this Indo Ice Cream Commercial
Some lean heavily towards the sexist tip, while some don't seem to lean quite so hard by being so commonplace in their sexism. (Seemingly the usual standard for Magnum Ice Cream)
Some rely on the incongruity of old people acting improbably, a popular "comedic" trope reliant on seeing old people as other in its way
While many of the most typical seem to just make use of children or reactions to children to sell their product, something one might find a bit disturbing in itself.
None of that is to deny the people their feelings on the FPP, but to suggest that the conventions are themselves often questionable so making something that goes against them can feel even more so, even if it may not be all that different at its core.
posted by gusottertrout at 11:39 PM on September 10, 2017 [1 favorite]
I had to listen to that eight times before I heard her say David and not Steven.
posted by Room 641-A at 1:07 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by Room 641-A at 1:07 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊⇊
posted by Start with Dessert at 1:30 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by Start with Dessert at 1:30 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
Fuckin' Halo Top. I am someone who goes wasaaaay out of his way to minimize his exposure to advertisements, yet I've been seeing their ads everywhere. First they invaded my Insta, even though it's basically just a curated collection of hiking snd landscape photos. Then I started getting coupons for their shit at the supermarket, even though I never buy ice cream. Then my sister brought some home. Then the billlboards started to appear. Now they're in my Metafilter.
Fuck off Halo Top, I don't want any.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 6:21 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
Fuck off Halo Top, I don't want any.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 6:21 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
I have only tried the Halo Top Chocolate (before the Stevia revelation) and it is surprisingly not Stevia sweet
That's sort of the point of chocolate flavor, though: It can hide anything.
I have a similar aversion to such sweeteners, but I can tolerate the chocolate (or red velvet) flavors of Halo Top because it's so thoroughly masked.
(No I don't buy it myself, but there are people in my house who really like whatever the latest health/diet fad might be, and if they're just gonna up and leave it there in the freezer, unlocked and unguarded, with the word CHOCOLATE on it, well, I am not responsible for whatever might happen at 3am, is all I'm saying.)
posted by rokusan at 7:17 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
That's sort of the point of chocolate flavor, though: It can hide anything.
I have a similar aversion to such sweeteners, but I can tolerate the chocolate (or red velvet) flavors of Halo Top because it's so thoroughly masked.
(No I don't buy it myself, but there are people in my house who really like whatever the latest health/diet fad might be, and if they're just gonna up and leave it there in the freezer, unlocked and unguarded, with the word CHOCOLATE on it, well, I am not responsible for whatever might happen at 3am, is all I'm saying.)
posted by rokusan at 7:17 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
Now they're in my Metafilter.
Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:38 AM on September 11, 2017 [3 favorites]
Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:38 AM on September 11, 2017 [3 favorites]
MetaFilter: Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.
posted by Room 641-A at 8:13 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by Room 641-A at 8:13 AM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
OK so in 2009 I got word that my grandmother had had a heart attack or some kind of heart failure and pneumonia and something else and they had basically moved her into a hospice so I took a few days of leave to go and say goodbaye and whatnot. And when I got there she'd been in the hospice two or three days, but she was sitting sort of propped up and eyes open and alert-- and the nurses kept saying, "well, you get some better days and some worse days, but basically, you know, this is the end", and she couldn't keep anything down, kept throwing up even water, so they were giving her ice chips to suck on and that seemed about all she could handle. But then there was a shift change or something and a new nurse came in who hadn't been there before and was very chipper and frankly a little loud but anyway she asked my grandma if she needed anything and grandma kind of choked out, "ice cream," and the nurse said she'd see what she could do, even as others warned her that she kept throwing up everything. But the nurse came back a few minutes later with a little dixie cup of ice cream and spooned it into her mouth and grandma just started to get more talkative and adjusted the bed to sit up a little more, and she did spit up a little of the ice cream at the beginning but ate some more and kept it down. So we stayed with her and talked with her for a while and then it was time to go home, and we went back the next day and she was still talking and sitting up.
I may have come back one more day, I can't really remember, but then I had to leave, fly back across the country because I had to go back to work, and when I got back, people were offering their condolences on my loss because they knew I'd taken emergency leave to go see off my grandma in the hospice. And I said, well, she's still hanging on but you know how it goes, there are good days and bad days...
So she kept hanging on, and in fact getting better, although she was bedridden (had been for years) because basically all the cartilege in her back had worn away, and after about two weeks the hospice kicked her out because she clearly wasn't on death's door, so my aunt moved her into some kind of care home. And she was there for a while (six months? a year?) before all of her life savings were completely depleted and she had to move into a medicare home which according to my aunt (who lived in the same town) was much less nice than the private place but they couldn't afford anything else. And there she remained until last year, when she finally passed away at the age of 99. Which on the one hand of course was very sad for all of us, but on the other hand, she had been bedridden and in pain for years and had been kind of depressed and basically looking forward to her final reward since my grandfather had died in 1995 or so.
But the point of this story is, of course, the ice cream, which I'm still not sure I know whether it was a good thing or a bad thing that it seemed to bring her back from the brink and give her 7 more years in bed.
I don't recall seeing any robots at the hospice though.
posted by Hal Mumkin at 9:33 AM on September 11, 2017 [8 favorites]
I may have come back one more day, I can't really remember, but then I had to leave, fly back across the country because I had to go back to work, and when I got back, people were offering their condolences on my loss because they knew I'd taken emergency leave to go see off my grandma in the hospice. And I said, well, she's still hanging on but you know how it goes, there are good days and bad days...
So she kept hanging on, and in fact getting better, although she was bedridden (had been for years) because basically all the cartilege in her back had worn away, and after about two weeks the hospice kicked her out because she clearly wasn't on death's door, so my aunt moved her into some kind of care home. And she was there for a while (six months? a year?) before all of her life savings were completely depleted and she had to move into a medicare home which according to my aunt (who lived in the same town) was much less nice than the private place but they couldn't afford anything else. And there she remained until last year, when she finally passed away at the age of 99. Which on the one hand of course was very sad for all of us, but on the other hand, she had been bedridden and in pain for years and had been kind of depressed and basically looking forward to her final reward since my grandfather had died in 1995 or so.
But the point of this story is, of course, the ice cream, which I'm still not sure I know whether it was a good thing or a bad thing that it seemed to bring her back from the brink and give her 7 more years in bed.
I don't recall seeing any robots at the hospice though.
posted by Hal Mumkin at 9:33 AM on September 11, 2017 [8 favorites]
this whole thread is just a rollercoaster of wildly varying emotions. I think I need to buy a pint of ice cream, curse at it, and then eat it while I watch a movie about robots.
posted by numaner at 1:52 PM on September 11, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by numaner at 1:52 PM on September 11, 2017 [3 favorites]
> I believe the line is "Where's David?" which can be read as part of the overall reference to 2001 A Space Odyssey where the lead character was David Bowman.
It's Stephen, and it's sad, and this commercial makes me depressed. I don't like horror movies (or Halo Top) so I wouldn't've seen this usually, I guess.
posted by The corpse in the library at 2:57 PM on September 11, 2017
It's Stephen, and it's sad, and this commercial makes me depressed. I don't like horror movies (or Halo Top) so I wouldn't've seen this usually, I guess.
posted by The corpse in the library at 2:57 PM on September 11, 2017
It's Stephen, and it's sad
Huh, I only hear David and Food and Wine Magazine and AV Club also have it as David, but I can't find anything more definitive than that.
It is a depressing as it plays off the idea of the trope of eating ice cream being like a reversion to childhood by referencing both the 2001 old man to Starchild transformation and the "second childhood" of senility. The commercial doesn't allow for much distance from the woman which makes the identification with her stronger, and much more disturbing than most commercial depictions of women and old age that aim to appeal, amuse, and flatter.
posted by gusottertrout at 3:46 PM on September 11, 2017
Huh, I only hear David and Food and Wine Magazine and AV Club also have it as David, but I can't find anything more definitive than that.
It is a depressing as it plays off the idea of the trope of eating ice cream being like a reversion to childhood by referencing both the 2001 old man to Starchild transformation and the "second childhood" of senility. The commercial doesn't allow for much distance from the woman which makes the identification with her stronger, and much more disturbing than most commercial depictions of women and old age that aim to appeal, amuse, and flatter.
posted by gusottertrout at 3:46 PM on September 11, 2017
I think I need to buy a pint of ice cream, curse at it, and then eat it while I watch a movie about robots.
I can recommend some music.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 5:43 PM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
I can recommend some music.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 5:43 PM on September 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
Listening again, I can hear it as David or Stephen.
posted by The corpse in the library at 6:03 PM on September 11, 2017
posted by The corpse in the library at 6:03 PM on September 11, 2017
I don't think the majority of people who see this commercial for the first -- and maybe only -- time will make any connection to 2001.
posted by Room 641-A at 6:21 PM on September 11, 2017
posted by Room 641-A at 6:21 PM on September 11, 2017
Their ice cream has been in our fridge many a time before. I don't think it is quite a pint. Ben & Jerry's is a pint. I can eat a pint of Ben & Jerry's easy. I can eat a half gallon (a true 64oz half gallon) of ice cream. My house loves ice cream. I don't think we need to re-evaluate... except... maybe more things should be made into ice cream.
posted by Nanukthedog at 7:23 PM on September 11, 2017
posted by Nanukthedog at 7:23 PM on September 11, 2017
I don't think the majority of people who see this commercial for the first -- and maybe only -- time will make any connection to 2001.
No, probably not in any direct sense, but they'll likely see it set in some sort of futuristic environment with a robot programmed to help that is acting against the desire of the person it is serving in a way that suggests a serious defect of logic, where a thing that is held as a frivolous pleasure in our lives, ice cream, becomes menacing when it is all there is that is known or remains of the familiar.
The ad isn't a parody of 2001, that would be much simpler and be more easily forgettable. It just uses some of the imagery and ideas as a bridge to its more disturbing suggestive elements that call to mind hospital or nursing home care. The music ties the idea of ice cream to some more distant past where it was a pleasure, suggesting that attachment may come from or refer to the woman herself, which makes her further confusion over place and time more redolent of senility.
None of those things in themselves are "there" in an wholly concrete way, as no definitions or context is provided to ease our understanding of the events, just as it is for the woman. It's only how I put the experience together into a more cohesive whole as a way to best explain my feelings on the commercial and understanding of where they come from. Others can certainly view it differently, as the commercial simply is what it is in the most basic manner.
posted by gusottertrout at 11:05 PM on September 11, 2017
No, probably not in any direct sense, but they'll likely see it set in some sort of futuristic environment with a robot programmed to help that is acting against the desire of the person it is serving in a way that suggests a serious defect of logic, where a thing that is held as a frivolous pleasure in our lives, ice cream, becomes menacing when it is all there is that is known or remains of the familiar.
The ad isn't a parody of 2001, that would be much simpler and be more easily forgettable. It just uses some of the imagery and ideas as a bridge to its more disturbing suggestive elements that call to mind hospital or nursing home care. The music ties the idea of ice cream to some more distant past where it was a pleasure, suggesting that attachment may come from or refer to the woman herself, which makes her further confusion over place and time more redolent of senility.
None of those things in themselves are "there" in an wholly concrete way, as no definitions or context is provided to ease our understanding of the events, just as it is for the woman. It's only how I put the experience together into a more cohesive whole as a way to best explain my feelings on the commercial and understanding of where they come from. Others can certainly view it differently, as the commercial simply is what it is in the most basic manner.
posted by gusottertrout at 11:05 PM on September 11, 2017
I just saw it for the first time with no context - it was dumped onto the end of a serious current affairs news show.
I got the 2001 references.
I got the black mirror vibe.
I hated it.
I don't look forward to the nightmares I am going to have because of having seen it.
posted by Faintdreams at 4:43 PM on September 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
I got the 2001 references.
I got the black mirror vibe.
I hated it.
I don't look forward to the nightmares I am going to have because of having seen it.
posted by Faintdreams at 4:43 PM on September 13, 2017 [1 favorite]
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posted by Ice Cream Socialist at 8:42 PM on September 9, 2017 [10 favorites]