Dark lipstick looks amazing until it doesn't
December 11, 2017 11:06 AM   Subscribe

 
Another strategy also from Reductress: Woman Lasts An Entire Party Saying Only the Word ‘Definitely’
posted by Space Coyote at 11:27 AM on December 11, 2017 [13 favorites]


I am TERRIBLE at performing the more physical properties of femininity. Not exclusive to makeup, but makeup has always been a total mystery to me. I am not sure how other people get makeup to stay on longer than like 7 minutes. Once in a while, I'll try and I consistently fail, so I figure this just wasn't something I was supposed to be good at and leave it at that.
posted by Sophie1 at 11:28 AM on December 11, 2017 [13 favorites]


Okay, so this time you just YouTubed makeup tutorials because there has to be a trick to it or something, right? Like, how does anyone get the lipstick to stay on the inner lips part? And then are you not supposed to speak or drink or eat the rest of the day? Even drinking with a straw is a mess. Is reapplication necessary every hour? Stay, committed, girl!

it me
posted by Snarl Furillo at 11:37 AM on December 11, 2017 [16 favorites]


I've been trying to wear makeup for more than half my life and only on the last year or so have I finally started to get it right on a semi regular basis. It's hard.

Running in heels is easier than anything to do with makeup including trying to get the damn stuff off of your face.
posted by sio42 at 11:37 AM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


Buzzfeed did a listicle about Make Up charts and I was like, "ooh, maybe I can make this work for me a little better than: put on foundation, eyeliner, and lipstick. Enjoy put-together look for 30 minutes before it's like you never did a damn thing at all."
posted by Kitteh at 11:43 AM on December 11, 2017 [2 favorites]


I'm so glad my lady doesn't even fuck with makeup. She's very lucky to have very nice skin, and I've always been of the position: why ruin your good skin by clogging your pores with makeup?

Once in a while, I'll try and I consistently fail, so I figure this just wasn't something I was supposed to be good at and leave it at that.

As other people are saying in this thread, makeup is a big, difficult thing to learn. People go to college to learn to be makeup artists. People spend years training just to be able to do makeup for a crappy TV pilot that never made it to airing. Most pretty people we see on television have teams of people doing their makeup for them, it's doubtful they know how to do it themselves.

There's also this big crossover between general makeup artists and people who do actual costume/props for horror films and the like, which is honestly where I think the 'dark makeup' look is stemming from. Horror movies have been said to have been saving the movie industry. Between that and the explosion of Cosplay, I think you have more people pursuing doing makeup as an actual job instead of just doing it for themselves, and a lot of prevalence of "dark" makeup inspired by the horror movies everyone loves.

In other words, I think you're probably totally normal and that you're not missing out on some big secret and the reality is that makeup is and always will be a very difficult thing to do, and thus kind of an absurd expectation of a modern woman who is busy being a worker, a mother, and a homemaker, and is somehow also expected to be a sex symbol on top of all that while she scrapes by barely making above minimum wage.

You do you, I think everyone will be better for it.
posted by deadaluspark at 11:43 AM on December 11, 2017 [4 favorites]


did u just mansplain makeup lol
posted by runt at 11:46 AM on December 11, 2017 [314 favorites]


I'm so glad my lady doesn't even fuck with makeup. She's very lucky to have very nice skin, and I've always been of the position: why ruin your good skin by clogging your pores with makeup?

You look weird. Are you sick?

You look tired.
posted by leotrotsky at 11:47 AM on December 11, 2017 [53 favorites]


Sorry, yeah, worked in television for a long time so it's still a subject I think about a lot.
posted by deadaluspark at 11:47 AM on December 11, 2017 [4 favorites]


There's a huge difference between tv makeup and daily makeup, you man.
posted by peripathetic at 11:50 AM on December 11, 2017 [53 favorites]


I am seeing this on a day when I've brought my very last shreds of the only foundation that I ever liked to work with me to try to find a replacement. The exact foundation I liked got discontinued, and finding a proper shade has been a crap shoot thus far (the first thing I had was too pale, the second thing I got was a little too orange).
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 11:52 AM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


(hit post too soon)

Going foundationless only means that the uneven tone from 47 years of existance is prominent.

Makeup blows.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 11:52 AM on December 11, 2017 [7 favorites]


The patriarchy hurts everyone, even men who talk about makeup.
posted by some loser at 11:54 AM on December 11, 2017 [33 favorites]


What does makeup make up?
posted by TwelveTwo at 11:56 AM on December 11, 2017


I do remember the dark lipsticks of the nineties with fondness, though! I had this color from Shiseido that they reformulated called Dragon's Blood, and the old color was perfect - dark enough to read as a dark lipstick, not matte but not really glossy and was still reddish/human-colored enough that it didn't contrast weirdly with the inside of your mouth when you talked. And I had something or other from Nars that I liked a lot, also this metallic purple from one of those Young Person nineties lines - Hard Candy or something - that I just loved even though it was hard to wear.

Even when I was attempting a feminine gender presentation, make-up didn't really suit me, though, so I'm relieved that I don't need to wear it - I always feel that it looks best on people with large eyes, wide mouths and pronounced features in general and since I have a very flat Scandinavian kind of face I always feel that it just looked sort of dabbed on at random - my features have many fine qualities but are not really built to highlight.
posted by Frowner at 12:01 PM on December 11, 2017 [8 favorites]


Nice to be reading about dark lipstick and not about whether it's outdated or retro or "back", but about how hard it is to wear. I think dark lipstick looks amazing! And as a non-lipstick wearer, I need stuff like this to keep me grounded when I start to think... well, maybe it wouldn't be that hard...
posted by Secretariat at 12:03 PM on December 11, 2017 [5 favorites]


There is one darker-shade lipstick that actually does okay, though...I think makeup blows and I still actually like it to the point that I'm about to replace it. Clinique's "Almost Lipstick" is kind of like gloss that has a bit more staying power; it's just a hint of color, and somehow it kind of figures out what your own skin tone is and enhances it. Black Honey is the color you want.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 12:07 PM on December 11, 2017 [27 favorites]


I get what the Reductress is about, but I think satire is most effective when the writer knows a great deal about the topic being satirized, and I suspect that this is not the case here. There are so many excellent transfer-proof (well, mostly) lipstick formulas on the market now that wearing a vampy lip isn't quite half as messy as it used to be.
posted by peripathetic at 12:11 PM on December 11, 2017 [18 favorites]


I never got into makeup in the classic sense, but lipstick got me into makeup at all, in the sense of going around with green/blue/etc. lips and just having fun with it. Of course it's going to be trickier if you're trying to put it on and keep it on all day every day while maintaining perfectly smooth lip-skin and whatnot. With the assistance of a properly long-lasting formula, it's not so bad for the casual lipstick wearer.

Also, maybe I'm just about to exhibit my ignorance, but... wouldn't drinking from a straw be worse than drinking out of the cup itself? The entire mechanism of the straw requires that you create a seal using both lips.
posted by inconstant at 12:32 PM on December 11, 2017


Halfway through the comments I was all 'OH but Clinique Black Honey' and I see I was already beaten to it.

If you want something that really, really doesn't come off, to the point where it's almost problematic, Stila Stay all Day is it.
posted by fluttering hellfire at 12:32 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


There is one darker-shade lipstick that actually does okay, though...I think makeup blows and I still actually like it to the point that I'm about to replace it. Clinique's "Almost Lipstick" is kind of like gloss that has a bit more staying power; it's just a hint of color, and somehow it kind of figures out what your own skin tone is and enhances it. Black Honey is the color you want.

It's Red 21, a color changing dye. It will stain your fingers, as well as your lips, which if you're not into the dark berry pink that remains after the rest of the lipstick is gone, you're kind of stuck with.
posted by ApathyGirl at 12:36 PM on December 11, 2017 [5 favorites]


Black Honey looks weird on me; I've been cautiously trying Lipstick Queen Medieval.
posted by glitter at 12:44 PM on December 11, 2017 [6 favorites]


Black Honey lasts like 30 minutes on me? It's easy to reapply since it's sheer so I just reapply a lot but my experience has been that its staying power is not impressive. Am I doing it wrong?
posted by potrzebie at 12:47 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


I am pleased when the trends comport with the makeup I like to wear, but it doesn't tend to all be in style at the same time. I prefer matte eyeshadow but don't wear it every day, I eschew blush completely, I wear concealer under my eyes and across my nose but don't do all-over foundation, I yearn for the invention of a mascara that meets highly unreasonable standards of water-resistance/staying power/length-building/ease of removal/inexpensiveness, and I am bad at lipstick but make exceptions for the right sort of brownish-reds IF the texture is right and the taste isn't too distractingly annoying.

Pretty sure that there are women here who could guess my age from just the above.
posted by desuetude at 12:50 PM on December 11, 2017 [6 favorites]


I think satire is most effective when the writer knows a great deal about the topic being satirized.

Agreed. Plus, I think this must be mostly for white or light-skinned women. Black women wear shades of brown, burgundy and mauve everyday.

Matt purple and black are awesome but neither is a "go-to" color unless you're a Goth or hipster chick in a nontraditional job/industry.

I'm a died-in-the-wool deep red lipstick wearer. MAC Ruby Woo or NARS Dragon Girl.
posted by shoesietart at 12:52 PM on December 11, 2017 [11 favorites]


As a man, the closest I can relate to make-up is suits. Suits are a ton of fun if no one ever makes you wear them, there is no expectation to wear them, and then you can don them at your own whim when you want to.

I have a policy* with suits; if an employer wants me to wear them, they damned well better pay for them (and I want wear nice suits, not cheap ones). I think if employers would expect women to wear make-up they should pay them a make-up budget (above their base pay) to afford it.

*Note: I've never had an employer ask me to wear suits, and I imagine if I had one that did they'd laugh me out of the room when I told them my 'policy'.
posted by el io at 12:52 PM on December 11, 2017 [18 favorites]



Agreed. Plus, I think this must be mostly for white or light-skinned women. Black women wear shades of brown, burgundy and mauve everyday.


That's a totally good point! It makes me realize how much of the "dark lipstick is so edgy" stuff from the nineties was predicated on whiteness. I can think of only a couple of fashion spreads of that general grunge/nineties trend (and I paid attention to that stuff, even though I was all punk rock) where Black or non-light-skinned women of color were photographed, and now that I look back at those online, it looks like they put all the really trendy make-up on the white models anyway.

I guess that's one of the good things about trends coming back - I have seen a good number of neo-grunge fashion photos featuring Black women models and darker-skinned models generally, and I have definitely seen both wear-to-work and trendy dark lipstick features that focus on brands and shades for women of color.

(I really don't anticipate wearing lipstick or dresses ever again, but I will read all the articles about lipstick and dresses that you care to throw at me.)
posted by Frowner at 1:06 PM on December 11, 2017 [14 favorites]


Hell, I have been shaving for over 30 years, and I can't even get that right. And all THAT is just dragging a blade over someone's face. No real options.
posted by Samizdata at 1:06 PM on December 11, 2017 [3 favorites]


Pretty sure that there are women here who could guess my age from just the above.

I know that makeup routine. Pretty sure I'm in your demographic.
posted by fluttering hellfire at 1:07 PM on December 11, 2017 [2 favorites]


I suspect that this is not the case here. There are so many excellent transfer-proof (well, mostly) lipstick formulas on the market now that wearing a vampy lip isn't quite half as messy as it used to be.

I suspect there is not a single even peripherally-femme-adjacent person in the Western hemisphere who has missed the advent of 136 Hour Hold Your Tits Ultra Tight Cement Speckle Lip Tattoo and all of its cousins, while there are many of us who just find the still-demanding routine exhausting and overpriced for a holiday party novelty lip look. Makeup is annoying so we joke around about it.
posted by Snarl Furillo at 1:15 PM on December 11, 2017 [15 favorites]


I have given up on using any colored anything but Covergirl Outlast on my lips. It sticks around so well that I typically wake up with still-red lips, which is very unsettling when I first look in the mirror.

But yeah I literally cannot conceive of how any human person manages to wear actual lipstick-type lipstick for even ten minutes without rubbing it all over their entire face. Did these people have Scary Fashion Moms who swatted them if they ever touched their face or bit their lip? Is that why they all have clear skin too?
posted by showbiz_liz at 1:27 PM on December 11, 2017 [3 favorites]


This thread prompted me to go and check if the long-lasting liquid metallics that I've worn to cons* are still being sold, which... they aren't. Damn. But they were/are pretty nice -- good coverage, particularly the greenish-black one; not very heavy feeling; capable of surviving a meal provided that the food isn't greasy. (Well, I'm making the assumption that greasy food would remove it, since it's pretty much waterproof and the manufacturer said "remove with oil-based remover"; I didn't chance it and stuck to sandwiches.)

Frankly it's not really a problem of complication for me (I just... put the colorful goop on my lips? that's all?) so much as it is that my lips -- never having been an oasis of moisture in the first place -- dry out more and more easily as I get older, and chapstick/lotion doesn't go well with lipstick. (Not if you want either one to last, anyway!)

*two cons is plural!
posted by inconstant at 1:32 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


I just reapply with regular lipsticks. It's no big. Clear lipliner or a foundation matching concealer pencil used as a liner will keep it from bleeding out. You're welcome. You can dust powder over them through a tissue and it can temporarily stave off transfer issues, too.
posted by fluttering hellfire at 1:34 PM on December 11, 2017 [3 favorites]


I think well done makeup is unendingly impressive, and I do like rocking a pure red matte lip, but I can't imagine doing that kind of thing regularly. Like el io's suits, it's fun to do for occasions, and that's it.

I keep flirting with the idea of getting a dark vampy red the next time I feel particularly goth or retro, but I suspect it would mostly gather dust in my cabinet.
posted by tautological at 1:38 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


Wearing a really dark lipstick gives me the same sensation as wearing biker boots and leather jackets and clothes that make me feel kick-ass. It's a "fuck-off" mouth, it's a confident mouth. It takes maintenance, yes, and it's not for every day for that reason, but it's worth it for the times I feel like it. Some days are lip balm days, some days are sheer and nude and pink, some are blood red, and some days just cry out for the Rimmel Black Cherry of my goth nineties youth (with black eyeliner as lipliner for added depth). Makeup is fucking awesome.
posted by billiebee at 1:50 PM on December 11, 2017 [27 favorites]


She's more about eyes than lips, but if you want more amazing makeup and slapdowns of mansplainers you must go to Ijeoma Oluo's Facebook feed.
posted by The corpse in the library at 1:52 PM on December 11, 2017 [9 favorites]


My twelve-year-old daughter has been digging into makeup tutorials and making great strides in her makeup for a few years now, and at first I went with the traditional "oh no, she's getting old too quickly" but then realized it's a life skill she needs as much as anything else involving how to present yourself for success. So now I'm just happy she's so good at it.

She also helps me pick my outfits because she's better at it than I am
posted by davejay at 2:05 PM on December 11, 2017 [7 favorites]


There are so many excellent transfer-proof (well, mostly) lipstick formulas on the market now that wearing a vampy lip isn't quite half as messy as it used to be.

...and then your lips turn into a shredded Sahara mess.

This is why I usually only do my eyes. Judging by my hand towels, there's at least a semi-decent chance they'll make it to the end of the day.
posted by praemunire at 2:08 PM on December 11, 2017 [3 favorites]


I have never worn makeup to work, and it is kind of hilarious how people around me--even women--will talk about makeup as though it's a universal part of the experience of being a woman while I'm standing right there. But it's kind of the flip side of that "you look tired": If they've never seen you any other way, they just think you have incredibly bad skin and on the whole are not particularly attractive and that you don't take good care of yourself, but they don't sit there and think, "Oh, Sequence has visible acne sometimes, that probably means she doesn't wear concealer and foundation."

I used to have to do it for work, and it was hell. I totally understand why people do, because the reason I'm able not to is that I'm now a software developer and I don't have to look like a put-together professional woman in my 30s. It's a luxury most women don't have, and I treasure it.
posted by Sequence at 2:13 PM on December 11, 2017 [13 favorites]


You look tired.

How come the guy doesn't look like that sans makeup? Is he wearing man makeup?
posted by The_Vegetables at 2:25 PM on December 11, 2017


Because he looks distinguished. /s
posted by fluttering hellfire at 2:31 PM on December 11, 2017 [10 favorites]


He doesn't. You've got so used to using it unecessarily that you cannot live without it.!!!
posted by Burn_IT at 2:31 PM on December 11, 2017


Some of us like it! And won't apologize! Because we don't have to! I ain't sorry. Hell no.
posted by fluttering hellfire at 2:34 PM on December 11, 2017 [11 favorites]


I like dark lipstick, but I agree the reality of it is too fussy! I hate going through my day having to think about if my lipstick looks weird. So I’m a big fan of darker sheers, they’re much less upkeep and as mentioned Clinique Black Honey is a popular one. Lipstick Queen also has quite a few interesting sheer colours. Right now I’m digging Lipstick Queen Bête Noire Possessed Sheer.
posted by exquisite_deluxe at 2:44 PM on December 11, 2017


I feel a distinct difference in the artistry even within my own home of doing a daily airbrush work face vs really enjoying constructing an effect with different colours and patterns for effect. Work face tends to fall by the wayside as the mornings get busy but I still derive personal satisfaction from creating the effect.
posted by chiquitita at 2:55 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


I wear various amounts of makeup depending on whether I feel like it or not, but I have never really got the hang of lipstick at all. Dark lipstick is hard and makes me feel kind of conspicuous or something, but not-dark lipstick seems kind of pointless, like I can't even really see it.

But anyways, now I am going to tell a story. One day, I went to the liquor store where they have all these really good looking men working there for some reason. I'd put on some lip balm in the car before I went in, bought some beer and talked to the handsomest of the handsome men for a while. It was only then, when I got back in the car, that I caught a glimpse of myself in the rear view mirror and realized that THAT WAS PURPLEY BROWN TINTED LIP BALM that I'd just sloppily smeared all over my face, and I'd just spend five minutes talking to the handsomest man looking like an extra tatty Baby Jane Hudson.
posted by ernielundquist at 2:55 PM on December 11, 2017 [15 favorites]


...and then your lips turn into a shredded Sahara mess.

Try the Armani lip magnets! Liquid lipsticks mostly passed me by until I noticed that the Asian beautysphere, whom I trust for products that are comfortable and long-lasting, was all atwitter about them. The lip magnets wear like iron and have been so much kinder to my lips than the YSL glossy stains, for instance. I've recommended the lip magnet to a friend with chronically dry lips due to an auto-immune condition, and it's worked out for her. The reds and berry shades are beautiful!
posted by peripathetic at 3:21 PM on December 11, 2017 [3 favorites]


I just reapply with regular lipsticks. It's no big. Clear lipliner or a foundation matching concealer pencil used as a liner will keep it from bleeding out. You're welcome. You can dust powder over them through a tissue and it can temporarily stave off transfer issues, too.

Now I understand how folks feel when I try to explain cryptography to them.
posted by el io at 3:32 PM on December 11, 2017 [12 favorites]


When I wore lipstick regularly, I was a goddamn wizard at keeping it on for hours without much weirdness. My routine was thus:

1. Vigorously exfoliate my lips with a damp, cheap washcloth.
2. Apply moisturizer and lipstick primer.
3. Apply lipstick. Form an O with my lips and push my finger in and out of my mouth. This removes any color that bled into the inner lip and could get stuck on my teeth.
4. Use a tissue folded over once and blot once.
5. Reapply lipstick. Redo finger thing.
6. Set with powder.

When wearing a dark lipstick I used a stain in the same color family before applying the lipstick in order to make fading less obvious as the day progressed.
posted by xyzzy at 4:02 PM on December 11, 2017 [10 favorites]


I am a total lipstick convert after getting into lipsense. It lasts for like 12 hours, no joke. I have fallen asleep and woken up and my lipstick is perfect. It's probably giving my lips cancer but it looks amazing, I can talk and eat and sing and mainly, drink, to my heart's content without a single reapplication!

Anyway, I don't actually sell it, it's probably a cult, but I've gone from never wearing lipstick to owning 7 different shades (they even have black!) and rocking it on the weekends.
posted by liquorice at 4:32 PM on December 11, 2017


> As a man, the closest I can relate to make-up is suits.

No, not really. Suits are the male equivalent of... suits. If we're looking strictly at the burdens that are put on people at work, there isn't a male equivalent for cosmetics.
posted by The corpse in the library at 4:36 PM on December 11, 2017 [13 favorites]


[A few comments deleted; take a gander at that recent MeTa and let's try that again?]
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 5:02 PM on December 11, 2017 [3 favorites]


This thread reads to me like one of those infomercials with the people smashing a tomato into a butter knife while the voiceover goes "There's got to be an easier way!" I genuinely did not realise lipstick was so complicated. How does it get all over your face? Like, I wouldn't even know where to start recommending a good lipstick that stays in place. They're all so good now, they all pretty much stay in place. I think I do get some extra smudge allowance because my skin is brown. But I had no idea y'all were living in this world of pain.

My only lipstick tip is for my dry-lipped brothers and sisters. I find it essential to wear lip balm under my lipstick. I kiss the back of my hand to get rid of the excess balm before I put the lipstick on and it goes on really well.
posted by two or three cars parked under the stars at 5:24 PM on December 11, 2017 [7 favorites]


Writing my comment again without quoting the gendered insults. If you'd like, you can know that my future wife is yelling something much worse than "Jerks!" when she's angry at the product people on the conference calls I overhear.

------

My fiancé manages the pro business for one of the big makeup brands, and if I've learned anything about the makeup biz from our years together, it's that any new industry trend tends to come down to one group of people: Instagram fame seekers jerks.

Not so much what the trends that regular people follow, but that trends the makeup companies really start pushing.

It's a feedback loop. "Influencers" on Instagram start doing a thing, the makeup companies fixate on it and promote the shit out of whatever the new thing is, the people on Instagram chase whatever the companies push in order to get more product/recognition/followers/whatever, the companies double down because "oh shit these girls with 100k followers really like what we are doing", so on and so forth.

Of course the world wide makeup industry is like $80B a year and "girls with lots of likes on Instagram" make up (no pun intended) a small partition of that. But, the product development folks really get caught up in doing what that group of influencers want, instead of trying to make the groups that don't give a shit about Instagram happy.

Anyway, I can't say for certain that dark lipstick falls in that category, but "I'd wish they'd stop going after those Instagram jerks!" is something that often gets said in my house during her conference calls, so it's a good chance.
posted by sideshow at 5:33 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


And since I re-did my comment, I actually had time for an text convo with her about the dark lipstick trend.

She says Chanel Vamp came out in the 90s and dark lipstick was a giant 90's trend. Since 90's fashion in coming back in a big way, makeup is following suit. Also, her brand really hit hard with dark lipsticks back in 2010, but they aren't pushing them as much for this next season. But her brand has European roots and they purposely don't immediately go all-in on US trends.
posted by sideshow at 5:44 PM on December 11, 2017 [2 favorites]


Hell, I have been shaving for over 30 years, and I can't even get that right. And all THAT is just dragging a blade over someone's face. No real options.

I’m a little worried by the “someone’s” in that sentence....
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:53 PM on December 11, 2017 [9 favorites]


Chanel also used to make a Very Vamp, which was what Uma Thurman wore in Pup Fiction. I owned. It was awesome.
posted by fluttering hellfire at 5:58 PM on December 11, 2017


With Mattique foundation and Lancome eyeliner. I'm having a nostalgia fit.
posted by fluttering hellfire at 5:59 PM on December 11, 2017


I actually had to wear full makeup today for the first time in years (work headshots) and it felt weird. Lipstick makes my teeth look yellow and I can't stand it, so base, blush, eyeshadow and eyeliner...I had to go buy the blush. I actually like all the super intense eyeshadow colors you can get now, though they're definitely more for fun than work. If I was in HS I'd be trying out artsy effects from YouTube all the time.

Makeup's still a lot of work, though. Don't think I'll go back to wearing it every day.
posted by emjaybee at 6:08 PM on December 11, 2017


why ruin your good skin by clogging your pores with makeup?

see also: "Girl, You Don't Need Makeup"
posted by lisa g at 6:16 PM on December 11, 2017 [5 favorites]


You look tired.

I have had the good fortune to never have anyone* say this to me even though for my entire life I have never worn makeup for more than two weeks out of a year.

Of course, I'm also chronically ill and think that people shouldn't ask me "how are you doing?" if they don't want an honest answer, so 90% of my conversations lead with "I'm tired." So probably I just beat them to the punch.

*Other than my perceptive mother in law, who only says it when I'm legitimately about-to-fall-over levels of exhausted and she can tell I need to Go To Bed.
posted by brook horse at 6:25 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


Agreed. Plus, I think this must be mostly for white or light-skinned women. Black women wear shades of brown, burgundy and mauve everyday.

That's a totally good point! It makes me realize how much of the "dark lipstick is so edgy" stuff from the nineties was predicated on whiteness.


Yep -- I've seen more excitement around rumors that Rihanna's Fenty Beauty is launching a blue-black lipstick than any other lip product launch this year. It's a color that looks amazing and basically works as a neutral on Rihanna's skin tone, but would make the most lighter-skinned women look like corpses.
posted by mrmurbles at 6:41 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


Fenty Beauty is really making all the right moves, hopefully her success can throw some more light to other brands that cater to darker-skinned people, then maybe I don't have to pay exorbitant shipping just because my country's marked under 'East Asia' even though it's a VERY mixed demographic.

re: lipstick - to anyone still wondering, I want to throw my supporting 2 cents as well. Current formulas are becoming increasingly wearable and long-lasting, while being highly pigmented. For me, that's the secret for a lippy staying on - it's got to make my lips feel moisturised and comfortable, then I won't need to lick them every so often. In fact for my dryish skin, having makeup on is an additional layer of protection - it's when I don't have them on for long periods is when I start to see cracks. (but then I approach makeup to be part of skincare? so formulas are very important to me, without even getting into shades)
posted by cendawanita at 7:09 PM on December 11, 2017 [3 favorites]


(I hope no one minds me piping up during a lull to say that I suspected, but wasn't sure, that make-up was so damn technical. I knew it could be a total pain in the ass to do well and keep looking good, but I didn't realize that there is so much theory. My last experience with makeup was in 2nd & 3rd grade when I was in two high school plays, and we got pancake applied with the same roller they used to paint the sets.)
posted by wenestvedt at 7:23 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


I really like the Colourpop Ultra Satin lipstick formula for longevity, but I kinda don't like the actual colors, maybe because they are so bright and non-sheer that I think they all look weird on my face. I'm unsure which of the highly-rated shades besides Dopey I'd ever actually convince myself to wear outside the house.

Basically I want lipstick to last forever unless it looks terrible on me, in which case I want it to fade immediately and evenly into a faint smudge that I can cover with tinted lip balm like I meant to do that on purpose.
posted by nicebookrack at 7:41 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


My misadventures with makeup are relatively brief, and mostly concentrated around the eyes (my current makeup routine is 1) line top lids. 2) Done.) However! A few years ago Sephora gave out mini NARS lip pencils for their free birthday gift. I always figured I was a bit too much of a shrinking violet to wear the red NARS Cruella of the duo, but one day I tried it on and WOW.

It's gotten me to experiment a bit with lip stuff, which also happens to be much more straightforward to apply when you're as myopic as I am. The Cover Girl Outlast really does last forever. I have a lip pencil I bought from a vending machine (!) in Turkey. I'm currently wondering if I can get away with wearing a Burt's Bees lip crayon to work, or if the colour is a bit too much. (I still marvel that an old boyfriend of mine was able to tell, on sight, that I was wearing coloured Burt's Bees lipgloss one day; I certainly didn't think it was obvious at all, so I feel like my makeup detect-o-meter is not terribly sensitive.)

I kind of wish I'd recognized my internalized misogyny earlier so I could see makeup as a fun thing that people could do for themselves rather than an obligation thrust upon us by patriarchy.
posted by invokeuse at 9:22 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


God I love reading other people's frustration with lipsticks. I never realized how crooked my lips are till I started wearing bright red lipstick. And then I got purples and blacks and ... the inside of my lip is too wet, it never sticks! It's complicated stuff. I do enjoy watching youtube makeup tutorials, although I rarely attempt any of it. Heck even the effort of doing a good blow-out of my curly hair myself is too much work.
posted by taterpie at 10:44 PM on December 11, 2017 [1 favorite]


Invokeuse, that was the BEST Sephora birthday gift!! I never thought I'd wear the Cruella, but I ended up loving it.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 11:03 PM on December 11, 2017


> A few years ago Sephora gave out mini NARS lip pencils for their free birthday gift. I always figured I was a bit too much of a shrinking violet to wear the red NARS Cruella of the duo, but one day I tried it on and WOW.

Same same. That Sephora giveaway was genius.
posted by desuetude at 7:20 AM on December 12, 2017 [1 favorite]


I can‘t be bothered to wear make up most days. I probably should, given my job, but I don‘t. No energy for pain in the ass type stuff.
When I do have the energy, it‘s fun, though. And reading this thread makes me want to try All The Things. Thanks!
posted by Omnomnom at 9:12 AM on December 12, 2017 [1 favorite]


As an old time goth who wore black eyeliner pencil as lipstick through most of highschool I have to admit to preferring today's liquid lipstick options. Nyx and WnW catsuit don't budge the way dark and reds used to. And I've also loved the Stila red gifted a few years ago, which I'll be replacing.

Personally these days I'm really into the Korean-style using dark colours only in the centre of my lips and a light gloss on the outline - like in this video: https://youtu.be/spEpWdX1bnc
There are several more steps shown than are really necessary, but the first two + optional powder feathered around the edges last all day during my volunteer shifts where I do a lot of talking and staying hydrated with copious amounts of water.

And perhaps this is still too many steps, but I never leave the house without concealer, mascara and eyeliner, so take that as you will. I love makeup and have rediscovered how much joy painting my face brings me. Articles like this make me feel defensive and remind me of lectures by HR that my purple eyeshadow is unprofessional while my colleagues' flip flops are fine.
posted by A hidden well at 9:26 AM on December 12, 2017 [10 favorites]


This all is making me want to try makeup but that first step from "middle-aged woman who is currently dressed head-to-toe in Duluth Trading Company clothing and has worn lipstick twice in her life" to "person who wears makeup and feels comfortable in it" is a biiiiiig one.
posted by The corpse in the library at 12:42 PM on December 12, 2017 [5 favorites]


My first step, as a young twenty something who had no makeup experience, was BB cream. Not far from a tinted moisturizer, almost a foundation. It evened out my skin tone and, more importantly, made me feel good. Now I get an Ipsy sample box in the mail every month and have started to try using 2 (!) eyeshadows on my eye.
posted by Night_owl at 1:29 PM on December 12, 2017 [1 favorite]


I was a bit too much of a shrinking violet to wear the red NARS Cruella of the duo, but one day I tried it on and WOW.

Agreed the Cruella is amazing. I bought a full-sized after that sample, so their ploy worked.

Another dark one I love is Natasha by Stila. It's moisturizing and pretty long-wear... and maybe discontinued as a colour so excuse me while I buy the entire online stock.
posted by urbanlenny at 1:46 PM on December 12, 2017 [1 favorite]


It's winter, it's drying, time to add some new balm:
Lip liner to even out the edges: Rimmel 071 Cherry Kiss
Lip balm: Burt's Bees in Red Dahlia (Neutrogena has a SPF 20 lip balm I've used for years in 60 Fresh Plum)
A touch of color lightly blended in: Revlon Super Lustrous Lipstick in 477 Black Cherry

This gives me the needed protection with just a hint of color. Nice!
Thanks for the recommendations!
posted by TrishaU at 2:09 PM on December 13, 2017 [1 favorite]


Fluttering Hellfire - On your recommendation, I've ordered the Stila stay all day. I'll report my results back.

Re: lipsense. I really wanted to love it, but you actually have to maintain the gloss. All day. I cannot manage this, therefore, after 3 hours I look like someone did something terrible to my lips and I have a weird disease on them. I am terrible at makeup.
posted by Sophie1 at 7:09 AM on December 15, 2017 [1 favorite]


Oh yesss, I forgot about the gloss. I have always had terribly dry lips so I've always been obsessive about constantly applying lip balm, so the gloss felt no different to me.
posted by liquorice at 8:55 AM on December 15, 2017


I'm so glad my lady doesn't even fuck with makeup. She's very lucky to have very nice skin, and I've always been of the position: why ruin your good skin by clogging your pores with makeup?

I’m so glad my man doesn’t even fuck with antacids. He’s very lucky to have excellent digestion, and I’ve always been of the position: why chew on chalk when you’ve never had a case of heartburn?

I’m so glad my lady doesn’t even fuck with property taxes. She’s very lucky to have signed a twenty year lease, and I’ve always been of the position: why ruin your credit rating by paying taxes that don’t apply to you?

I’m so glad my man doesn’t even fuck with hair dye. He’s very lucky to have zero gray hair and to live in a culture where men having gray hair makes them look distinguished, and I’ve always been of the position: why douse your hair in chemicals when your hair is already a culturally appropriate color?

I’m so glad my pet doesn’t even fuck with heartworm medication. He’s very lucky to be a goldfish, and I’ve always been of the position: why risk death by taking medication that is only prescribed to other species?

Anyway, my fun fact is that wearing makeup makes my skin break out less, and my other fun fact is that I had horrible, painful acne from ages 14-24 (yay Accutane), and my other fun fact is that having visible acne uncovered by makeup is a great way for people to be really cruel to you in public on the regular, and my other fun fact is that second guessing the choices of other people based on a fundamental misunderstanding of what their choices might mean is gross.
posted by a fiendish thingy at 9:53 AM on December 18, 2017 [8 favorites]


Thanks to this thread I went out and bought some Black Honey. Holy sweet mother of pearl is that stuff the cat's PJs. Now I will feel extra badass going into 2018!
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 4:57 PM on December 18, 2017 [3 favorites]


Brerfly and I just finished watching the great british bakeoff series 7, and we had multiple discussions about the relationship between Candace's ultra-pigmented lipsticks and her exaggerated lip expressions. Which came first? Was one meant to draw attention to or distract from the other? Were we only noticing the lip contortions because her lipstick made her lips look like they hovering, disconnected from the rest of her face? The discussions weren't mean spirited, we were rooting for her, but as a makeup choice it did draw our attention.
posted by mumblelard at 11:50 AM on December 28, 2017


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