I come from Earth, a planet of outlaws.
December 22, 2017 11:05 AM   Subscribe

Dear NASA,

My name is Jack Davis and I would like to apply for the planetary protection officer job. I may be nine but I think I would be fit for the job. One of the reasons is my sister says I am an alien, also I have seen almost all the space and alien movies I can see. I have also seen the show Marvel Agents of Shield and hope to see the movie Men in Black. I am great at video games. I am young, so I can learn to think like an Alien.

Sincerely,

Jack Davis
Guardian of the Galaxy
Fourth Grade

posted by Johnny Wallflower (21 comments total) 16 users marked this as a favorite
 
I have to show this to my 4th grader. Hopefully it will inspire him to write and spell as well as Jack.
posted by slogger at 11:14 AM on December 22, 2017 [1 favorite]


GROSS SCIENTIST SOBBING
posted by barchan at 11:24 AM on December 22, 2017 [9 favorites]


Kudos to NASA for taking Jack's interest to heart.
posted by mule98J at 11:24 AM on December 22, 2017


He's hired.
posted by scaryblackdeath at 11:42 AM on December 22, 2017 [1 favorite]


Well, this kid has the same name as a legendary cartoonist and MAD magaziner, so I (1) question his sincerity and (2) have a suggestion for another career if this Galaxy Guardian thing doesn't work out.
posted by oneswellfoop at 12:03 PM on December 22, 2017 [3 favorites]


Sorry, kid - here's my Jack Davis.

edit: gatdangit
posted by Guy Smiley at 12:04 PM on December 22, 2017 [1 favorite]


....because Jack is such a very uncommon first name, and Davis is likewise so extremely uncommon? It's not like there might be 2,000 estimated dudes named Jack Davis out there...

Guys, they spoke to this kid. I'm going to say he's probably an actual kid.
posted by sciatrix at 12:08 PM on December 22, 2017 [5 favorites]


So many great minds with the same MAD MAD MAD MAD thought... yes, my "question his sincerity" was a bad joke, but I still recommend he use comics as a backup plan...
posted by oneswellfoop at 12:13 PM on December 22, 2017


I have to show this to my 4th grader. Hopefully it will inspire him to write and spell as well as Jack.

You know Jack, the position of President of the United States may be open soon too.
posted by XMLicious at 12:23 PM on December 22, 2017


This is great. That Jim Green responded is really neat.

There's a little, tiny, irritating, pedantic part of me that wishes Green had explicitly told the kid he wouldn't be hiring him, though. A throw away line about how he didn't yet meet the degree requirements, or the requirement for a year in a previous GS-15 level position, would have been even more fun. As it stands, he didn't actually tell him whether or not he was still being considered for the job. (I realize everyone involved, including the kid, know full well he's not getting the job. But, why not play along just a bit further?)

Isn't going from guarding a galaxy to protecting a planet a demotion?
posted by eotvos at 12:31 PM on December 22, 2017 [2 favorites]


I'm going to use this as a template for my cover letters.
posted by AFABulous at 12:34 PM on December 22, 2017 [1 favorite]


> You know Jack, the position of President of the United States may be open soon too.

And if you're not a Russian agent, you'll be better qualified for the job than the current one.

This is really a fat pitch down the middle for NASA - I would have expected nothing less from them. A huge return on very little extra effort, and all it took was for someone to care.
posted by RedOrGreen at 12:35 PM on December 22, 2017 [1 favorite]


Isn't going from guarding a galaxy to protecting a planet a demotion?

The Doctor is a powerful Time Lord, capable of traveling anywhere and anywhen in the entire universe, yet spends most of his time (on average, and not counting the 900 years on Trenzalore) running around quarries in Wales.
posted by Celsius1414 at 12:49 PM on December 22, 2017 [12 favorites]


What a massive disappointment - the kid was dreaming of blasting aliens with a laser cannon, and they tell him to stay in school.
posted by thelonius at 12:50 PM on December 22, 2017 [1 favorite]


I thought I was immune to this sort of thing by now, but nope - I guess not. *sniff* (Shout out to the Liberty Science Center!)
posted by Space Kitty at 1:07 PM on December 22, 2017 [1 favorite]


> What a massive disappointment - the kid was dreaming of blasting aliens with a laser cannon, and they tell him to stay in school.
Arguably Peter Quill might not have turned into a complete dick if he had stayed in school.

I also wrote to NASA when I was Jack's age. I wasn't interested in being a planetary protector: I was building a rocketship in my back yard, and I wanted advice.

In response NASA and sent me a ton of papers on space engineering, medicine, and details of the Space Shuttle, which was just being fabricated. I still have a lot of the material with me now, 40 years later.

I never got the rocketship finished, but the fact that a space agency took my question seriously and respectfully meant a huge amount to the nerdy Kiwi kid I was, and kindled a life-long passion for space and science.
posted by Bora Horza Gobuchul at 1:08 PM on December 22, 2017 [31 favorites]


brb updating my resume
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:18 PM on December 22, 2017 [1 favorite]


I read in an autobiography* that in 1969 if you wrote to NASA they would send you some posters, even in Scotland.

*Craig Fergusson, American on Purpose
posted by adept256 at 2:31 PM on December 22, 2017


I was his age during the moonshots. I wanted to be an astronaut So. Bad. Asked me about my Major Matt Mason collection, which I wish I still had. But it was pointed out to me (at that time anyway) that all astronauts were recruited from an elite pool of Air Force pilots, and I thought it over, & yeah, I’m not much of a joiner, so the air force wasn’t my bag.

I will however be in Florida when they finally launch the SLS on EM1 Because my kiddo’s crew module will be on top of it. Wikipedia says 2019, kiddo says “Yeah, no, 2020.” But I cannot wait. She can be pessimistic - she keeps betting against Space X & losing
posted by Devils Rancher at 5:36 PM on December 22, 2017 [3 favorites]


Awwwww, what a sweet story.
posted by medusa at 8:10 PM on December 22, 2017


I wanted this job when it was originally posted some months back. But knew I was slightly under qualified... and would refuse to do a drug test. But I did write to NASA asking them to let me take a shot at designing the logo.
posted by Liquidwolf at 7:24 PM on December 23, 2017


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