I Don't Think People Say "The Furtive Genius of Foxboro."
January 21, 2018 11:51 AM Subscribe
I think saying the patriots only have 2 Goliaths really isn't correct either... Brady has options that aren't just because he's a good QB - he has options because there are a ton of Goliaths and Juggernauts keeping him protected and the ball moving down the field.
Not to quibble though.
Also... I think I'm over reverse orchestra stings.
Oh look... you're standing on my lawn. I need to go find my old man hat and glasses.
posted by Nanukthedog at 12:10 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
Not to quibble though.
Also... I think I'm over reverse orchestra stings.
Oh look... you're standing on my lawn. I need to go find my old man hat and glasses.
posted by Nanukthedog at 12:10 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
I stopped watching the NFL this year, but I am definitely keep an eye on the box score for this one, crossing my fingers that the Jags win. I think I care about this game more than the Superbowl this year.
posted by codacorolla at 12:15 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by codacorolla at 12:15 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
BLAKE BORTLES!
“All we need is a defense ...and an offense ...and some rule changes.” -Jason Mendoza
posted by leotrotsky at 12:56 PM on January 21, 2018 [14 favorites]
“All we need is a defense ...and an offense ...and some rule changes.” -Jason Mendoza
posted by leotrotsky at 12:56 PM on January 21, 2018 [14 favorites]
I have far too many contradictory feelings about this teaser. CURSE YOU MALKOVICH.
posted by praemunire at 1:00 PM on January 21, 2018 [5 favorites]
posted by praemunire at 1:00 PM on January 21, 2018 [5 favorites]
Ok, I’m at a kids birthday party and am furtively checking my phone to check the box score.
What the hell is going on? Is Brady that wounded? Are they just spotting them some points?
posted by nubs at 1:06 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
What the hell is going on? Is Brady that wounded? Are they just spotting them some points?
posted by nubs at 1:06 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
I'm technically not allowed to root for anyone other than the Pats because I live inside 495. If anyone local finds out I'll have an Irishman with a broken bottle in one hand and a rotten potato in the other hand beating down my door. So please don't tell anyone I love the whole BORTLES meme.
posted by Talez at 1:18 PM on January 21, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by Talez at 1:18 PM on January 21, 2018 [4 favorites]
JORTLES
Surely
But regardless I seem to care? C’mon Bortles, mess Brady UP
posted by schadenfrau at 2:09 PM on January 21, 2018
Surely
But regardless I seem to care? C’mon Bortles, mess Brady UP
posted by schadenfrau at 2:09 PM on January 21, 2018
Gronkowski is out for the entire game with a concussion.
posted by praemunire at 2:52 PM on January 21, 2018
posted by praemunire at 2:52 PM on January 21, 2018
If I had watched this with my eyes closed I would have bet a hundred dollars it was Phillip Seymour Hoffman speaking. Is the similarity as uncanny as I think?
posted by kinsey at 2:53 PM on January 21, 2018
posted by kinsey at 2:53 PM on January 21, 2018
I’m sorry Jason. :’(
posted by Talez at 2:54 PM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by Talez at 2:54 PM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
Nasal Disdain is a register both do well, but Malkovich is drier, Hoffman was...more rounded, I guess.
posted by praemunire at 2:55 PM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by praemunire at 2:55 PM on January 21, 2018 [2 favorites]
The boring, dying sport for boring old white man advances the most boring, most racist, most emblematic team of all its faults to the playoffs yet again. I'm done with the NFL. This is the first year I don't watch the Superbowl in decades.
posted by codacorolla at 2:56 PM on January 21, 2018 [5 favorites]
posted by codacorolla at 2:56 PM on January 21, 2018 [5 favorites]
There’s still time! There’s still time!
posted by schadenfrau at 2:56 PM on January 21, 2018
posted by schadenfrau at 2:56 PM on January 21, 2018
Are you seeing into the future? Titans have the ball and over two minutes.
posted by praemunire at 2:57 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by praemunire at 2:57 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
most racist
Um, the Washington [Redacted] are calling?
posted by axiom at 3:10 PM on January 21, 2018 [6 favorites]
Um, the Washington [Redacted] are calling?
posted by axiom at 3:10 PM on January 21, 2018 [6 favorites]
Everybody who bet on the Patriots lost their money so hooray for that at least.
posted by bukvich at 3:11 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by bukvich at 3:11 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
((contented sigh))
posted by TWinbrook8 at 3:38 PM on January 21, 2018
posted by TWinbrook8 at 3:38 PM on January 21, 2018
I never watch football or drink absinthe, but I ended up downtown watching this game while sipping absinthe this afternoon. That ad seems like some genius demographics at work - I dunno.
posted by lagomorphius at 4:55 PM on January 21, 2018
posted by lagomorphius at 4:55 PM on January 21, 2018
I never watch football or drink absinthe, but I ended up downtown watching this game while sipping absinthe this afternoon.
Did...did it make your heart grow fonder?
Also:
Titans have the ball and over two minutes.
Well, there’s the problem, right there
We’re over on FanFare watching the Eagles run up the score...
posted by Huffy Puffy at 5:47 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
Did...did it make your heart grow fonder?
Also:
Titans have the ball and over two minutes.
Well, there’s the problem, right there
We’re over on FanFare watching the Eagles run up the score...
posted by Huffy Puffy at 5:47 PM on January 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
Everybody who bet on the Patriots lost their money so hooray for that at least.Not if you bet the moneyline!
posted by Lame_username at 7:08 PM on January 21, 2018
The boring, dying sport for boring old white man advances the most boring, most racist, most emblematic team of all its faults to the playoffs yet again.
Good lord, give it a rest. The Patriots are not "emblematic of all the NFL's faults". You hate them because they are successful, full stop.
posted by King Bee at 4:11 AM on January 22, 2018 [6 favorites]
Good lord, give it a rest. The Patriots are not "emblematic of all the NFL's faults". You hate them because they are successful, full stop.
posted by King Bee at 4:11 AM on January 22, 2018 [6 favorites]
I hate the Patriots. And by association I now hate John Malkovich.
posted by tommasz at 6:32 AM on January 22, 2018
posted by tommasz at 6:32 AM on January 22, 2018
You hate them because they are successful, full stop.
NOPE, can confirm I hated them as soon as I moved to Boston and encountered the fan base (Red Sox, too)
It only got worse when they started winning
posted by schadenfrau at 6:54 AM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
NOPE, can confirm I hated them as soon as I moved to Boston and encountered the fan base (Red Sox, too)
It only got worse when they started winning
posted by schadenfrau at 6:54 AM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
Oopsies. Some news agency sent out an alert the Patriots had won - illustrated with a photo of a Patriot wearing 81 diving for the ball. Only problem: That was an old photo of convicted murderer Aaron Hernandez, who wore 81, not game hero Danny Amendola, who wears 80. A bunch of TV stations blasted out the same headline and photo on social media, including one station that really should've known better: WCVB in Boston.
posted by adamg at 8:53 AM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by adamg at 8:53 AM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
I have far too many contradictory feelings about this teaser. CURSE YOU MALKOVICH.
Mine were simpler and more cynical. I ascertained the imminent one-note joke in the first 10 seconds and cursed the NFL for all sorts of stuff. But at least I didn't watch it. ;) (I do really like Malkovich, so I'll pretend it never happened--DENIAL WORKS.)
The boring, dying sport for boring old white man advances the most boring, most racist, most emblematic team of all its faults to the playoffs yet again. I'm done with the NFL. This is the first year I don't watch the Superbowl in decades.
YES. That's the stuff. Join our side. The NFL is the shittiest sports league ever. Enough is enough. Stop watching.
posted by mrgrimm at 10:11 AM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
Mine were simpler and more cynical. I ascertained the imminent one-note joke in the first 10 seconds and cursed the NFL for all sorts of stuff. But at least I didn't watch it. ;) (I do really like Malkovich, so I'll pretend it never happened--DENIAL WORKS.)
The boring, dying sport for boring old white man advances the most boring, most racist, most emblematic team of all its faults to the playoffs yet again. I'm done with the NFL. This is the first year I don't watch the Superbowl in decades.
YES. That's the stuff. Join our side. The NFL is the shittiest sports league ever. Enough is enough. Stop watching.
posted by mrgrimm at 10:11 AM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
Yeah -- I don't get the hate for the Patriots, other than people dislike seeing the same team win. Belichek is best coach we've maybe ever seen for any sport...Brady's arguably the best QB in the history of the NFL. They play crisp, disciplined football...they take chances...they like goofball plays...they maintain their level of play despite operating in a payroll system that was built to foster parity. They play hard and smart. They make adjustments like no other team. I mean, they're a friggin' football clinic, and if you like the game, you should love the Patriots.
This will be over soon, and as long as there'll be football, they'll talk about this team. I say, enjoy greatness. You don't often get to see it.
posted by touchstone033 at 12:42 PM on January 22, 2018 [5 favorites]
This will be over soon, and as long as there'll be football, they'll talk about this team. I say, enjoy greatness. You don't often get to see it.
posted by touchstone033 at 12:42 PM on January 22, 2018 [5 favorites]
Brady's arguably the best QB in the history of the NFL
He's also a golfing buddy of Trump, and supported him during the campaign because he'd put a putting green on the White House lawn.
It really annoys me how everyone in the Boston area just seems to collectively forget what a horrible, vapid, and utterly superficial person he is because winning. If Brady was any other kind of celebrity, we'd be collectively scorning him for being a complicit supporter of Nazis.
posted by RonButNotStupid at 3:36 PM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
He's also a golfing buddy of Trump, and supported him during the campaign because he'd put a putting green on the White House lawn.
It really annoys me how everyone in the Boston area just seems to collectively forget what a horrible, vapid, and utterly superficial person he is because winning. If Brady was any other kind of celebrity, we'd be collectively scorning him for being a complicit supporter of Nazis.
posted by RonButNotStupid at 3:36 PM on January 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
Aside from Tom Brady being eminently unlikeable, everyone hates the Patriots because the Patriots are cheating cheaters. It's not a matter of opinion - they were caught cheating multiple times. And Spygate was likely far, far worse than reported - possibly over a decade of systematic and organized surveillance of other teams. It's widely believed that Goodell destroyed evidence and brushed it under the rug to protect the NFL's rep.
posted by gnutron at 7:04 PM on January 22, 2018
posted by gnutron at 7:04 PM on January 22, 2018
Ah, New England sports fans. Never change.
posted by codacorolla at 7:48 AM on January 23, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by codacorolla at 7:48 AM on January 23, 2018 [1 favorite]
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