Fanch, Hoop of Gomb, Beth Factory, Ben Sex, Bustles Muckson + more
January 27, 2018 11:05 AM   Subscribe

 
Delightfully, at least one of these is in fact actually a band (warning: discography is NSFW, music probably NSFL, i am not gonna listen to find out tho)

I am super-disappointed to discover Giraffics is taken, as a concept.
posted by halation at 11:14 AM on January 27, 2018 [2 favorites]


Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage - Babystician!
posted by Constant Reader at 11:20 AM on January 27, 2018 [1 favorite]


If I'd seen that poster without explanation, I would have just thought "wow, I really am out of touch with current music".
posted by octothorpe at 11:21 AM on January 27, 2018 [18 favorites]


Cob and Hoon are 90s grungeternative bands doing the 20th-anniversary reunion circuit. Mother Acid are a competent but derivative psych band; they’re signed to Fuzz Club, alongside other bands like Underground Youth and Sonic Jesus. Bengalman is a grime rapper from the UK, and Postwolves are a shoegaze/black-metal project from Finland or Latvia or somewhere. Bonky Gormon, meanwhile, snuck in from a Brass Eye chiron.
posted by acb at 11:26 AM on January 27, 2018 [7 favorites]


who needs reality anymore?
posted by philip-random at 11:28 AM on January 27, 2018 [1 favorite]


No Beecock Dragon?
posted by The Underpants Monster at 11:35 AM on January 27, 2018 [12 favorites]


Hoop Of Gomb, meanwhile, are a concept project based on reviving the brown-acid-drenched excesses of the 70s. Basically fuzzed-out jams stretched out to 27-minute anthems about wizards and astronauts and inner space and such, alternating between jug-band blues, pretty twiddly bits and the “seriously monged music” from the anti-drug classroom in Brass Eye, drenched in reverb and delay.
posted by acb at 11:42 AM on January 27, 2018 [3 favorites]


So good. House of The Gavins, Max Beaf, Lab Raid, Psychic Gloria. Let's just Stop Making Sense, proxy the impulses.
posted by Oyéah at 11:42 AM on January 27, 2018 [3 favorites]


I’ve long believed that our greatest untapped resource for band names is the Jack Kirby Kamandi map.

Polar Parasites!
Jaguar Sun Cult!
Country of the Screamers!
Orangutan Surfing Civilization!
Kanga Rat Murder Society!
posted by 1970s Antihero at 11:47 AM on January 27, 2018 [13 favorites]


How the hell do you train a recurrent neural net to invent arch portmanteaus like "Scenemy"?
posted by paper chromatographologist at 11:48 AM on January 27, 2018 [6 favorites]


I love this but a few of these seem too good to be true (ex: "U? P!", and "Creepwell, Then Sleepwell"), suggesting curation/creation by the bot-handlers and not merely generated, but still pretty good.
posted by glonous keming at 11:48 AM on January 27, 2018 [4 favorites]


I have the first Otherfax EP from the 80's for sale. Check my Bletsy page for that and fan art.

Fun fact: Jonathan Gristle was in U? P! before leaving to form Otherfax with the bass player from The Toad Strokers. U? P! is just a little too outdoorsy and mineral rights-y for me though.
posted by petebest at 11:52 AM on January 27, 2018 [2 favorites]


Mother Acid are a competent but derivative psych band

Mother Acid is essentially a real band already.
posted by atoxyl at 12:03 PM on January 27, 2018 [2 favorites]


U? P! would be 00s electro-rock party-grooves, like You Say Party We Say Die, !!! or Disco Disco Disco Fuck. All catchy choruses and handclaps.
posted by acb at 12:03 PM on January 27, 2018 [3 favorites]


curation/creation by the bot-handlers and not merely generated, but still pretty good

I think most of these are curated?
posted by atoxyl at 12:04 PM on January 27, 2018


By the time I get to "Bowel Prank" it makes me crack a smile every time.
posted by atoxyl at 12:07 PM on January 27, 2018 [3 favorites]


In light of recent obits, a "the Fall titles" generator would be pretty good too.
posted by atoxyl at 12:12 PM on January 27, 2018 [1 favorite]


I'm pretty sure Baddwurds is a fake band from a sunday school comic about the dangers of unsupervised fun.
posted by traveler_ at 12:14 PM on January 27, 2018 [2 favorites]


Melon Soxprane

A regression to the gourd bands of the 90s
posted by thelonius at 12:19 PM on January 27, 2018 [3 favorites]


Also, Chesty Squiders belong in that fetish artist thread.
posted by traveler_ at 12:20 PM on January 27, 2018


Pegged always puts on a good show, but they have to tone it down a bit for festivals.
posted by curiousgene at 12:25 PM on January 27, 2018 [5 favorites]


"The Shitty Beatles? They any good?"
"They suck."
"So it's not just a clever name."
posted by Phobos the Space Potato at 12:36 PM on January 27, 2018 [7 favorites]


The more recent Beth Factory stuff has felt really over manufactured
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 12:57 PM on January 27, 2018 [5 favorites]


the Bootleg Tims are selling counterfeit Canadian coffee and donuts out of the back of their van
posted by saturday_morning at 1:18 PM on January 27, 2018 [12 favorites]


Bogwolf was so much better before they lost their bassist. In a swamp, ironically.
posted by GenjiandProust at 1:25 PM on January 27, 2018 [6 favorites]


How the hell do you train a recurrent neural net to invent arch portmanteaus like "Scenemy"?

I expect you just stop training it before it stops making Scnemee and Scenenenene and Gllllllll and so on, and pick the occasional arch portmanteau and funny-sounding semi-nonsense from the 99% that are unfunny garbage.
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 1:32 PM on January 27, 2018 [7 favorites]


The Better Beatles
posted by thelonius at 1:54 PM on January 27, 2018


Medium Garth, Wide Bertha..
posted by Oyéah at 3:08 PM on January 27, 2018 [1 favorite]


I'd pay top dollar to see Skin Clump again!
posted by h00py at 5:07 PM on January 27, 2018 [1 favorite]


I feel sure that Bonky Gorman, Jentle Charley, and Grampman are going to meet at this Coachella, hit it off, and later form an old timey Blues trio.
posted by Knowyournuts at 5:18 PM on January 27, 2018 [1 favorite]


I didn't know that John Party x4 was out of rehab already. Definitely going to check that out.
posted by paper chromatographologist at 5:22 PM on January 27, 2018 [3 favorites]


If I'd seen that poster without explanation, I would have just thought "wow, I really am out of touch with current music".

Or, for me, a Thursday.
posted by zardoz at 5:30 PM on January 27, 2018 [3 favorites]


Otherfax is left-field/EDM. Glove is sort of like Spoon- 90s grunge rockers who've never gotten big but have never gone away either. Billions of Mario is this huge 8-bit collective- imagine Polyphonic Spree combined with Ratatat.
Huh, I'm surprised Big Big Sting is still around. They were one of those one hit wonders of the 90s Swing Revival.
I remember seeing Mike Gunk at Satyricon right after he'd broken up with Hoosier Don't. He was wearing a deep sea diving suit and playing a modified accordion for his whole set. It was weird and pretentious.
posted by LeRoienJaune at 6:46 PM on January 27, 2018 [5 favorites]


I am super-disappointed to discover Giraffics is taken, as a concept.

I assumed your link would point to these awesome murals in Oakland.
posted by aws17576 at 7:00 PM on January 27, 2018 [2 favorites]


Beachfeel has put out nothing but commercial drivel ever since Jonathan Mushboy left the band. He was the only one with talent and it’s kinda sad to see the Beach’s getting top billing.

We used to go see Slaw Bomb for a $3 cover down at Gilman Street when they were still cool. I just have to laugh at all the suburban mall rats forking over $200 to see them now.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 7:30 PM on January 27, 2018 [5 favorites]


I'm pretty sure Baddwurds is a fake band from a sunday school comic about the dangers of unsupervised fun.

No, they’re real but it’s weird they dropped the umlauts from their name.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 7:33 PM on January 27, 2018 [7 favorites]


Slaw Bomb has come along way from the BBQ place they all worked, in high school.
posted by Oyéah at 7:35 PM on January 27, 2018 [4 favorites]


Keith Bomb is a hell of a charismatic front man but it’s just not been the same since bassist Tommy Slaw OD’d.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 7:42 PM on January 27, 2018 [6 favorites]


God, they got Grampman too. How long can you maintain one gimmick? We get it — old people can rap.

I still have my copy of Tiger Balm Gangsta but it’s only because the used vinyl stores already have stacks of that record.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 7:59 PM on January 27, 2018 [5 favorites]


These are all very good but Jonathan Jazz makes me laugh every time I think about it
posted by theodolite at 8:24 PM on January 27, 2018 [1 favorite]


I’ve long believed that our greatest untapped resource for band names is the Jack Kirby Kamandi map.

Thank you for that. I am still giggling over the band-name perfection of "Orangutan Surfing Civilization."
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:33 PM on January 27, 2018 [1 favorite]


I have played in a dozen-odd bands over the years, but it is my great regret that I have not played in One of Pig.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 9:05 PM on January 27, 2018 [3 favorites]


Slaw Bomb has come along way from the BBQ place they all worked, in high school.

Bob Sloblaw Lobs Slaw Bomb
posted by atoxyl at 9:56 PM on January 27, 2018 [12 favorites]


Excellent and thanks to the author for not jumping on the bullshit cavalcade and describing it as having been AI generated.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 1:46 AM on January 28, 2018


100% worth it for "Fistopia."
posted by LMGM at 3:43 AM on January 28, 2018 [2 favorites]


Let's check this post in five more years to see how many of these band names were taken by real bands. Several of these are great, great band names.
posted by adamd1 at 11:34 AM on January 28, 2018 [1 favorite]




The real SXSW lineup is just as weird, if not more so.

https://schedule.sxsw.com/2018/artists
posted by macbot3000 at 12:12 PM on January 28, 2018


I just don't think One of Pig should be doing any of Three of Pig's songs. Dude was so eager to have a solo career, let him leave those to Two of Pig.
posted by zompist at 12:48 PM on January 28, 2018 [4 favorites]


Given that Toad The Wet Sprocket got its name from a Monty Python sketch, I’m betting that a bunch of these names will become real bands in the near future.
posted by Eikonaut at 7:37 PM on January 28, 2018


In the closing credits of a movie I watched today, the music supervisor was listed as "Richard H. Band." I immediately thought of this thread.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 12:09 AM on January 29, 2018


I’ve long believed that our greatest untapped resource for band names is the Jack Kirby Kamandi map.

Last Boy Band on Earth.
posted by octobersurprise at 12:38 AM on January 29, 2018 [3 favorites]


Excellent and thanks to the author for not jumping on the bullshit cavalcade and describing it as having been AI generated.

…?

From the tweet:
Announcing your 2018 COACHELLA LINEUP, generated by a neural network trained on thousands of band names: http://j.mp/2n5gybx
posted by Lexica at 10:18 AM on January 29, 2018


Drunk June started out derivative, and stuck with it, ...risking becoming as slow and painful as a stoned dentist. Their collab with the Double Entendres really saved them --'Sip me Baby, One More Time" was so pop it fizzed.
posted by GhostRider at 7:42 PM on January 29, 2018


- Zompist, the last straw was when they reunited as One If By Pig, Two If By Pig

- Pretty sure Man Mist fought Spider-Man toward the end of the 70s.

- Missie Dis Shite is trying to revive Scottish Ska (Skattish?), I would guess

- To heck with waiting for these to be real bands -- I'm starting a band right now just so I can claim Ow
posted by Quindar Beep at 11:04 AM on January 30, 2018 [1 favorite]


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