"Australians call this a fish, when it's clearly a fish."

April 9, 2018 5:02 PM

Jordan Watson, of How to Dad fame, explains the differences between Australia and New Zealand: Part 1, Part 2. (h/t Miss Cellania)
posted by Johnny Wallflower (27 comments total)

"this HOUSE is already pretty CROWDED"

Bless you, Jordan Watson. Bless.
posted by the return of the thin white sock at 5:34 PM on April 9, 2018 [4 favorites]

Can you really not tell the difference between the way he says "fish" and "fush"?

Hilarious. BTW only specific types of men's swimwear is called budgie smugglers. There are also togs, cozzies, bathers and probably some I don't know about. And I've never heard anyone say "strewth", definitely "oh bugger" though.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, nah.
posted by Athanassiel at 6:12 PM on April 9, 2018

This video gave me a deeper understanding of the rift between these peoples.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 6:59 PM on April 9, 2018 [1 favorite]

I see the New Zealanders are on board with Operation Let's Keep Quokkas To Ourselves. Yes, don't come to Australia, it's filled entirely with deadly animals that will under no circumstances hop into your photos and be adorable in front of the camera.

I will not, however, tolerate a man who pronounces 6 'sucks' making fun of the Australian pronunciation.
posted by Merus at 7:45 PM on April 9, 2018 [1 favorite]

Can you really not tell the difference between the way he says "fish" and "fush"?

That's the joke
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 8:28 PM on April 9, 2018 [4 favorites]

Togs, togs, undies
posted by Sebmojo at 9:48 PM on April 9, 2018 [12 favorites]

Thanks for that Sebmojo. Fucking hilarious.
posted by asavage at 9:59 PM on April 9, 2018 [1 favorite]

Every time NZ dialect comes up, I'm reminded of the medieval Great Vowel Shift that English underwent, spoiling its orthography forever but possibly opening it up to become the world-spanning word-gobbler it eventually became.
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 11:34 PM on April 9, 2018 [3 favorites]

I will not, however, tolerate a man who pronounces 6 'sucks' making fun of the Australian pronunciation

On the other hand, you haven't lived until you've seen the face of a NZ waiter moving from shock through bafflement to eventual comprehension when faced with an English family entering the pub and saying, "Hello, we have a reservation for sex, please".
posted by lollusc at 12:25 AM on April 10, 2018 [5 favorites]

"this HOUSE is already pretty CROWDED"

Also "that would be a LAP too far [PHAR]".

Good videos, stay on the right side of the line of poking fun at both countries.
posted by Pink Frost at 12:26 AM on April 10, 2018 [2 favorites]

More accurate about NZ than Australia, as one would expect, but great editing.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 2:47 AM on April 10, 2018

Also that first vid on how to get your baby to clean the house is sooooo cute and funny. Could have been an FPP on its own.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 3:02 AM on April 10, 2018 [1 favorite]

From my kids: "what do you call a fish with no eyes?" - "a fsh"
posted by pipeski at 5:03 AM on April 10, 2018 [5 favorites]

Russell Crowe is conspicuous by his absence on the lust of stolen-by-Strayan cultural Kiwi artifacts.
posted by Quatro-esto at 5:50 AM on April 10, 2018 [2 favorites]

Good stuff. My favourite moment of Aussie/Kiwi accent confusion when I lived in Christchurch twenty years ago was when we went down to Akaroa one day and ordered some fish and chips—no, it wasn't that, wait for it—and after she took our order the girl at the counter said, "Thetsutt?"

Took me a solid couple of beats before I could respond, "Oh! Yeah, that's everything thanks."

The other perennial source of amusement was how everyone we met brought up the pavlova dispute as if we had the foggiest and/or cared. On the underarm bowling, though, I watched that game live on TV, and I'm with the Kiwis. Ruined cricket for me.

If I were making this video as an Aussie talking about NZ I'd mention how every newspaper advert has an actual picture of a kiwi in it, everything there is "good as gold", and chocolate fish are awesome. (Also awesome: Kiwis; kiwis; the South Island; also the North Island; I can't vouch personally for Stewart Island.)
posted by rory at 7:52 AM on April 10, 2018 [1 favorite]

Could have been an FPP on its own.

I swear I've seen How to Dad on the blue before but I couldn't find it.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:59 AM on April 10, 2018

On the underarm bowling, though, I watched that game live on TV, and I'm with the Kiwis. Ruined cricket for me.

Indeed. It's taken us a hell of a long time to work out just what we needed to do to put that shameful episode behind us.
posted by flabdablet at 8:50 AM on April 10, 2018 [3 favorites]

> Abehammerb Lincoln:
"This video gave me a deeper understanding of the rift between these peoples."

"You can uncover your eyes, they're not Australians."

Comedy guld.
posted by chavenet at 9:37 AM on April 10, 2018

I just remember being baffled at a nice hotel in Wellington by repeated announcements asking for help at the chicken counter.

The check in counter, of course. But it in New Zealand it's pronounced EXACTLY the same as chicken. They pronounce chicken "chook".
posted by smartyboots at 1:47 PM on April 10, 2018 [3 favorites]

I'm disappointed there's no "shit as!"
posted by capricorn at 6:19 PM on April 10, 2018

They pronounce chicken "chook".

Twaddle. Chicken is pronounced 'chicken'. A chook is a colloquial term for a chicken.

BTW, did you know that in the U.S. 'man' is pronounced 'guy'?
posted by HiroProtagonist at 8:25 PM on April 10, 2018 [3 favorites]

I love How to Dad. The video of him announcing his book while riding a bungee slingshot is hysterical!
posted by 80 Cats in a Dog Suit at 7:15 AM on April 11, 2018

Best part is half way down the comments section: "DAD I don't like that man."
posted by flabdablet at 7:50 AM on April 11, 2018

Athanassiel: "And I've never heard anyone say "strewth", definitely "oh bugger" though."

I've only ever heard strewth from the How Ridiculous guys. So I assumed it was pretty common in Australia.

Johnny Wallflower: "I swear I've seen How to Dad on the blue before but I couldn't find it."

Found it for you:
👍🏼 (thumbs up emoji) posted by Johnny Wallflower
posted by zinon at 10:59 AM on April 11, 2018 [1 favorite]

oh jeez

I even searched my own activity because I'm the likeliest suspect
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 2:11 PM on April 11, 2018 [1 favorite]

I am an Australian that is currently traveling in NZ.

When you say ‘I’m Australian’, people here reflexively shout COBBER! In 20 years in Australia I’ve never heard anyone say ‘cobber’ sincerely.

But then, Australians shout CHILLY BUN! FUSH AND CHUPS! JANDALS! at kiwis so who am I to throw stones?
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 5:55 PM on April 11, 2018 [1 favorite]

Great stuff as always from 'How to Dad'. One thing's for sure, the All Blacks will beat the Ozzies any day of the week in rugby!!
posted by BestHairClippers at 6:49 PM on April 16, 2018