Look on my neon corporate wokeness, ye Mighty, and despair.
July 24, 2018 5:37 AM   Subscribe

Watson hosted a panel consisting of former New York Yankee Alex Rodriguez, Soulcycle founder Ruth Zukerman (because of course), former New Zealand soccer player Tim Brown, who now sells shoes, and Ryan Williams, who founded a real estate technology company with Middle East peace envoy Jared Kushner [...] The panel, "How to Succeed In Business Without a Rule Book," offered helpful advice on being rich, like fly "20 hours" if you have to in order to get to an important meeting.
' Fear and loathing at OZY Fest
posted by griphus (48 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite
 
Jeb!
posted by thelonius at 5:45 AM on July 24, 2018 [2 favorites]


If that pic of the lineup poster doesn't immediately implode your head with the dissonance-turned-up-to-12 nightmare it promises, you're made of better stuff than I.
posted by Thorzdad at 6:00 AM on July 24, 2018 [10 favorites]


The thing I don't get is how they're not yet grasping they have to change. Is it just a case of everyone's still getting paid so don't rock the boat?
posted by treblekicker at 6:04 AM on July 24, 2018 [3 favorites]


A-Rod really seems to like these weird motivational conference event things.
posted by The Card Cheat at 6:06 AM on July 24, 2018


If you find yourself in a crowd of people who have paid $100 to yuk it up with Karl fucking Rove, perhaps you should ask, are we the baddies?
posted by uncleozzy at 6:09 AM on July 24, 2018 [28 favorites]


At first I was focused on the part of the lineup poster that runs "Laverne Cox, Jemele Hill, Grover Norquist, Marcus Samuelsson," because that's a nice bit of low-key surrealism, but then I noticed that they also put Jemele Hill on there twice and I can't see anything else.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 6:33 AM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


Ugh. OTOH; a Rushdie appearance could make for some unwanted drama.
posted by Afghan Stan at 6:41 AM on July 24, 2018


A-Rod is a very weird person. I mean, even beyond the centaur painting thing.

If not for the baseball, I am certain he'd be selling timeshares in Florida or raving about anti-aging products on the Home Shopping Network.
posted by rokusan at 6:42 AM on July 24, 2018 [2 favorites]




Yikes. The lineup and schedule is just so, so what the hell. This whole thing is like Exhibit A for out-of-touch politics.

It's like when the parents try to set up a "cool" party for the kids.
posted by rokusan at 6:45 AM on July 24, 2018 [2 favorites]


Don't think of it as losing some plums, think of it as access to new plum opportunities.
posted by fleacircus at 6:45 AM on July 24, 2018 [5 favorites]


And the Fanfare thread for the Chapo episode, which includes the funniest video game joke in history, is here.
posted by Space Coyote at 6:46 AM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


This whole thing is like Exhibit A for out-of-touch politics.

Or, the Woodstock of both-sides-ism.
posted by Thorzdad at 6:47 AM on July 24, 2018 [13 favorites]


Harumph. Dan Carter would never.
posted by orrnyereg at 6:53 AM on July 24, 2018


Other than Laverne Cox and Rose McGowan, everyone involved in this self-regarding shitshow should cease to exist immediately. The void left by their absence would no doubt afford the world infinitely greater pleasure and utility than their continued presence.
posted by adamgreenfield at 6:59 AM on July 24, 2018 [6 favorites]


Anytime I notice a new article about this, I still click it and cross my fingers it's actually a video of Virgil Texas saying "this was a multi-platform hoax to promote our new book", because holy shit.
posted by lmfsilva at 7:07 AM on July 24, 2018 [2 favorites]


Now that HST is no longer with us, can we stop using “Fear And Loathing…” in titles? There wasn’t even one mention of high powered blotter acid in that article!
posted by TedW at 7:08 AM on July 24, 2018 [6 favorites]


I’m reminded of a rant I had the pleasure to hear in the now defunct bar Lit, which was the primary location of NYU students buying coke and is now the site of the Cock, the primary spot of graphic designers and realtors getting into bondage, paraphrased: “I fucking hate Americans, they always have to have these summits and meets and events where they pretend to be really invested and concerned. Like fucking Eden mountain, you can’t get together and be rich unless there’s a goal , you fucking Protestants. The English elite doesn’t do that they just fuck off and ride horses and get drunk together and don’t pretend to give a shit. Americans have to pretend they earned thier wealth and it comes with this fucking smarmy we-are-the-Important-people sheen. Give me the fucking ancient regime that knows it got what it has cause it killed a bunch of people.”
posted by The Whelk at 7:24 AM on July 24, 2018 [43 favorites]


Supposedly the Chapo people were on LSD, per the Rolling Stone article
posted by Noisy Pink Bubbles at 7:24 AM on July 24, 2018


I've never done acid, but if I somehow made a series of poor life decisions that led me to attending this Wankstock event, I think I'd consume any substance that offered a chance to take my mind elsewhere and/or the sweet release of death.
posted by tonycpsu at 7:35 AM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


Holy shit, their smug interpretation of Shelley's poem is something else. Look upon my works and despair, indeed.
posted by heteronym at 7:37 AM on July 24, 2018 [3 favorites]


Supposedly the Chapo people were on LSD, per the Rolling Stone article

One of the most stressful experiences of my life was going into a supermarket while on LSD - I can't imagine facing this type of deal.
posted by thelonius at 7:38 AM on July 24, 2018 [2 favorites]


Why was Stephen Pinker there?
posted by snuffleupagus at 7:50 AM on July 24, 2018


The check cleared?
posted by tonycpsu at 7:51 AM on July 24, 2018 [12 favorites]


> Why was Stephen Pinker there?

His whole deal is telling people that the status quo is good, they could have named this whole shit show after him.
posted by Space Coyote at 7:51 AM on July 24, 2018 [9 favorites]


Then maybe a better question is, why was Roxanne Gay there? Last I checked Pinker isn't just a "radical centrist," but also a loudmouthed transphobe.
posted by snuffleupagus at 7:55 AM on July 24, 2018


Then maybe a better question is, why was Roxanne Gay there?

She does have a history of knowingly sharing stages with avowed transphobes (eg her previous appearance alongside Greer on ABC Q&A) so it isn't out of character.
posted by Dysk at 8:03 AM on July 24, 2018


The English elite doesn’t do that they just fuck off and ride horses and get drunk together and don’t pretend to give a shit.

Sounds like someone needs to read The Remains of the Day. Or one of the many books on the history or country houses and how gathering to shoot at things was used as a way to exclude the "wrong" people from the political process.
posted by betweenthebars at 8:15 AM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


It is with eye-popping irony that OZY Media cites the Percy Bysshe Shelley poem "Ozymandias" as the inspiration for its confusing name. "[Y]up, most folks read that poem as a caution against big egos and the impermanence of power," the website's "about" page explains with a complete lack of self-awareness. "We read it differently. To us, the poem says think big, but be humble, lest you end up 'two vast and trunkless legs … in the desert.'"

This is beyond parody. No twitter dunk on the centrist establishment could ever, ever approach the gurning, banal idiocy of the festival's own goddamn name.
posted by ocular shenanigans at 8:18 AM on July 24, 2018 [15 favorites]


Let me ad this take from WAPO to the mix.
posted by zenon at 8:41 AM on July 24, 2018


Give me the fucking ancient regime that knows it got what it has cause it killed a bunch of people

This reminds me, the Duke of Westminster once asked what advice he’d give to young entrepreneurs keen to emulate his success:“Make sure they have an ancestor who was a very close friend of William the Conqueror,”.
posted by Damienmce at 8:55 AM on July 24, 2018 [18 favorites]


real close friends called him william the bastard actually
posted by poffin boffin at 9:02 AM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


Exhibit A why the revolution can't come soon enough:
"And we’re not afraid to challenge assumptions about the way the world is in order to see the world the way it could be. That conviction is right in our name. Yup, it’s from the Percy Bysshe Shelley poem 'Ozymandias.' And yup, most folks read that poem as a caution against big egos and the impermanence of power.

We read it differently...."
posted by entropicamericana at 9:12 AM on July 24, 2018 [3 favorites]


So what's worse, going to this or going to the Pinknic?
posted by Grither at 9:32 AM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


100% this. Not even close.
posted by uncleozzy at 9:35 AM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


I just spent two minutes on the pinknic website, and while it has a similar “is it real?” quality and is similarly unbelievably uncool, I think it might be kind of okay to actually be there if you somehow got in for free and could completely ignore the other attendees. OZY, on the other hand, seems like 100% horror show.
posted by mai at 9:45 AM on July 24, 2018


From the RollingStone article:
Feeling somewhat depressed, we trudged back up to the platform in time to watch Eureka of RuPaul’s Drag Race (centrism: now cool with the gays!), who was getting the crowd hyped for a panel on “the future of the conservative movement under Trump” with austerity crusader Grover Norquist and outgoing Representative/celebrated adulterer Mark Sanford (R-SC), who was recently defeated in his primary by Trump loyalist Katie Arrington. My brain shut off around the time moderator Ana Kasparian claimed Norquist as a liberal because he goes to Burning Man. Sanford got major applause from the presumably liberal audience for promising to stand against Trump’s “autocratic style.”
Ugh. Vixen saw her coming from a mile away.
posted by Atom Eyes at 9:49 AM on July 24, 2018 [3 favorites]


Came I. Here just to recommend the Chapo skewering of this shitshow.
posted by foxy_hedgehog at 9:52 AM on July 24, 2018


#VixenWasRight

Also...when we go eat the rich, is it possible to get napkins with their wack-ass quotes printed on them? At the least, that's a solid collectible.
posted by Ashen at 10:04 AM on July 24, 2018


How is this the third year they've done this
posted by edeezy at 2:46 PM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


Here just to recommend the Chapo skewering of this shitshow.

Unfortunately, that would mean listening to Chapo to do so.
posted by asteria at 4:54 PM on July 24, 2018 [2 favorites]


Then maybe a better question is, why was Roxanne Gay there? Last I checked Pinker isn't just a "radical centrist," but also a loudmouthed transphobe.

Roxane Gay is excellent in a lot of ways but it's my impression from following her on Twitter through the 2016 election season that this the thrust of this...event... is nearly perfectly in line with her politics. I say this as a hard leftist who has no truck with the Chapo internet left.
posted by invitapriore at 5:58 PM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


Unfortunately, that would mean listening to Chapo to do so.


Chapo is good. The Sarandon-yellers have lost this war. My condolences, better luck on the next go-round.
posted by Space Coyote at 8:12 PM on July 24, 2018 [5 favorites]


I wish this was like Fyrefest and everyone got scammed and stuck on an island eating baloney sandwiches.
posted by emjaybee at 8:32 PM on July 24, 2018 [4 favorites]


I read the whole article and I still don't understand what it is or why anyone would go there.
posted by runcibleshaw at 10:48 PM on July 24, 2018 [1 favorite]


It's a Radical Centrist (Right-Wing Lite, IRL) wankfest. You go there to have your socially liberal, fiscally conservative, pro-business Lean-In mindset pumped up with the illusion that TED Talks will save the world.
posted by Kitty Stardust at 8:33 AM on July 25, 2018 [1 favorite]


I wish this was like Fyrefest and everyone got scammed and stuck on an island eating baloney sandwiches.

It sounds to me like that's exactly what happened here, minus the island.
posted by Atom Eyes at 8:52 AM on July 25, 2018


It's a Radical Centrist (Right-Wing Lite, IRL) wankfest. You go there to have your socially liberal, fiscally conservative, pro-business Lean-In mindset pumped up with the illusion that TED Talks will save the world.

Kinda surprised Comey wasn't invited. He could be in a panel with entrepreneurs about creating your own market opportunities and becoming a star.
posted by lmfsilva at 9:56 AM on July 25, 2018 [2 favorites]


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