This is the auction for you,
June 2, 2002 12:42 PM   Subscribe

This is the auction for you, if you've totally forgotten what crystal pepsi tasted like, and you want to relive the glory.
posted by jcterminal (47 comments total)
he bought it twenty years ago, huh? because i remember drinking it when i was in the ninth grade... about eight years ago.

and it tasted like ass then. some people will buy anything.
posted by sugarfish at 12:58 PM on June 2, 2002

aw, I kinda liked crystal pepsi. Not enough to buy a slightly yellowed two liter bottle of it, but still!

I suppose I should start saving vanilla coke so that I can send my theoretical kids to their theoretical colleges...
posted by modernpoverty at 1:06 PM on June 2, 2002

Does he have any Crystal Pepsi With Lemon???
posted by Dirjy at 1:16 PM on June 2, 2002

"...and it tasted like ass then. some people will buy anything."

Actually ass tastes OK, and certainly better then Crystal Pepsi. I wonder if the buckling of the bottle is due to botulism?
posted by evanizer at 1:28 PM on June 2, 2002

Ha! People like stuff I don't enjoy? What losers!

Iced tea tastes like cow urine, and yet people drink it! HA HA! Can you believe it??
posted by daveadams at 1:39 PM on June 2, 2002

I did a google search for crystal pepsi and I found way too much information than I wanted. It seems that there may be some discrepancy with the claim of buying the 2 liter 20 years ago. I found a page that places the start date of Crystal Pepsi at April 13th, 1992. Horrible design aside, this is corroborated by The Crystal Pepsi Shrine, with further corroboration from a Bevnet forum, various usenet posts with none being earlier than 25 Jan 1993 . So there is no way this guy had a 2-litre from 20 years ago, the damn product wasn't even made yet.

On a side note, I found so many jokes and parodies of Crystal Pepsi that I am still rolling. Like the one poster that blames crystal pepsi for their bad eyesight! And one gem from 1993-01-29 has a recipe for Crystal Pepsi mixed-drinks.

I tell you, it is an untapped fountain of humor.
posted by plemeljr at 1:52 PM on June 2, 2002

Incredible post, plemeljr!

I remember Crystal Pepsi—it wasn't great. Certainly not worth buying a 10-year-old bottle of it. (I think he meant to type "10", not "20") It was just clear cola... a gimmick that didn't take.

Personally, I'd like to get another taste of Josta. That was a good soda from Pepsi that is now also discontinued.
posted by Down10 at 2:16 PM on June 2, 2002

josta was pretty good...

how could you not like a drink with a panther on it?
posted by PugAchev at 2:24 PM on June 2, 2002

The bottle shows some buckling that I am assuming is because of chemical changes in the bottle over the years.

In ten (not twenty) years, what could possibly have happened to the bottle if it's been unopened and hasn't been sitting out in the sun or something? Buckling? Chemical changes? Wouldn't the soda just be flat?
posted by UnReality at 2:25 PM on June 2, 2002

Yeah, I remember buying a couple of bottles of the stuff during the 92-93 school year, just to check it out. That's when the invisible cola's short time in the sun came about.
posted by clevershark at 2:45 PM on June 2, 2002

crystal pepsi was awesome.
not that i would buy a yellowed 10 year old bottle.
posted by juv3nal at 2:54 PM on June 2, 2002

I've googled as much as I can for now. But, wasn't there a barrage of "Crystal" or colorless products that were all introduced about the same time as Crystal Pepsi? I can't recall a one, except perhaps the clear Gatorade that still exists. But I remember expressing aloud ten years ago or so, "What's with all this crystal clear shit everywhere all of a sudden?"
posted by crasspastor at 2:59 PM on June 2, 2002

Heh -- the only thing this article really makes me long for is SNL's parody of Crystal Pepsi -- you remember, right? CRYSTAL GRAVY! Oh yeah!
posted by davidmsc at 2:59 PM on June 2, 2002

wonder why there was never an "opaque sprite" in response?
posted by jcterminal at 3:03 PM on June 2, 2002

Thanks, davidmsc! I've been looking for that clip. That was a classic SNL parody. I had also forgotten how apropos the Van Halen-ish music in the background was.
posted by iconomy at 3:07 PM on June 2, 2002

I remember...
Crystal clear laundry detergent
Clear dishsoap
Clear Pepsi...
I know there were more products, but I can't think of any. I guess that shows just how memorable most of these products were.
posted by bonheur at 3:12 PM on June 2, 2002

Crystal clear Amoco ultimate.
posted by @homer at 3:17 PM on June 2, 2002

In my search there was mention of Clear Tab of all things. I'm too tired to do a full google search. This usenet post discusses Crystal [or clear pepsi before the marketroids changed it] and Vanilla Coke and Clear Tab.

Did anyone have Ski Cola? I only had it when I went camping in Southern Ohio during Boy Scouts [something like 10-15 years ago]. It was like Mt. Dew, but much more sweeter and had something like 2-5x the caffeine and sugar. Man, that stuff was the wrong thing to give a camp full of pubescent males with pocketknives.

On another tangent, is this what we will be doing in 10 years? Will old-timers talk reverently about something called MetaFilter, recounting stories of pancakes, 1142 and rabbits? Will the new generation scour that MetaFilter site, that was rescued by some new search engine? will they do searches about the Seqway? Or Code Red? Google, what is that? End tangent, please return to normalcy.
posted by plemeljr at 3:26 PM on June 2, 2002

In ten (not twenty) years, what could possibly have happened to the bottle if it's been unopened and hasn't been sitting out in the sun or something? Buckling? Chemical changes? Wouldn't the soda just be flat?
That last is the most likely; all the CO2 probably escaped over the years, which would explain the buckling.
I liked Crystal Pepsi, but after ten years there's no way the contents of that bottle taste like anything other than… candied ass.
posted by darukaru at 3:56 PM on June 2, 2002

Some of the products are still kicking around although the marketing angle is different. The original products showcased their "clearness" by creating transparent packaging. Clear Deodorant is one, it's packaging is now early 21st century aqua.

You could make an arguement for clear deodorant I guess, "NO MORE TELL-TALE RESIDUE!". But Windex Clear is maybe not such a good idea, due to it's visual proximity to water. Lime green bottle seems to be the solution here, in addition "antibacterial" is the selling angle.
posted by jeremias at 3:56 PM on June 2, 2002

Boone's Farm (yes, I know...) Snow Berry Tastes almost exactly like Josta.

I thought I was in heaven when I stumbled across this treasure.
posted by esch at 4:11 PM on June 2, 2002

Also Zima & Liquid Dawn.
posted by Mick at 5:39 PM on June 2, 2002

What about the reverse clear trend? There's precious little information out there about 7up Gold.
posted by yerfatma at 6:09 PM on June 2, 2002

What's terribly spooky is that there were 11 bids for the buckled, yellowed bottle of old soda. Man, oh man...I gotta clean out my garage and see what sells on Ebay. :)
posted by dejah420 at 6:27 PM on June 2, 2002

I have several cans of unopened OK Cola... anybody wanna make me an offer I can't refuse?
posted by spilon at 7:04 PM on June 2, 2002

Seriously, dejah - I was cleaning out a drawer of old junk I decided I should keep as a child (my rationale for keeping some of this stuff is completely incomprehensible...), and I decided to check eBay to see if I could sell it. Lo and behold, people were selling at least half of the crap I found in that drawer. Virginia Slims playing cards, those little plastic "wings" they gave kids on airplanes, some random wind-up cars with a German name, Disney World pins... eBay is a strange, scary place...
posted by whatnotever at 7:29 PM on June 2, 2002

I was hoping someone would mention OK soda. I loved that stuff. Kinda tasted like cola/orange/root beer. Each time it seemed to taste a little different, too.
posted by Miss Beth at 7:54 PM on June 2, 2002

yes! OK cola rules! for the reason miss beth stated.

god i loved that stuff.

moxie's only good if you mix it. preferably with everclear. might as well. if it's gonna taste like ass, it should taste like death-asstm.
posted by jcterminal at 8:36 PM on June 2, 2002

I got my can of OK Soda right here... A reasonable substitute consists of 2/3 Coke, 1/4 Orange, 1/12 Dr Pepper. Just my two cents.
posted by j.edwards at 8:50 PM on June 2, 2002

Ass tastes OK?
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 3:24 AM on June 3, 2002

Apparently. Although I don't think they'll let you sell your ass on eBay.
posted by UnReality at 5:54 AM on June 3, 2002

I actually also have an unopened bottle of crystal pepsi, but I'm holding out to sell it on e-bay, I want more money for it! My bottle for it is also disfigured, and it's a result of the carbonation slowly seeping out. My bottle is definitely still sealed though ;).
posted by banished at 6:15 AM on June 3, 2002

No one's mentioned Crystal Light yet. So I will--'cause I believe in me. (humming)
posted by werty at 6:38 AM on June 3, 2002

I liked Crystal Pepsi too. Not enough to buy the 10-year-old bottle (I think the winning bidder paid $13 for it!). I can't picture pop that old tasting anything but bad.

Ski is still around. I can't find it up here but I know that it's available in the St. Louis area. When I go to Jaycee conventions, the people from that area (the IL St. Louis suburbs) always bring cases of the stuff.
posted by SisterHavana at 8:28 AM on June 3, 2002

and now, the obligitory simpsons quote:
"Mmmmmm - invisible cooolaa"

Thank you.

and what about zima gold? remember that? looked just like piss, tasted like candy. ahh, high school.
posted by Hackworth at 8:34 AM on June 3, 2002

What about the reverse clear trend? There's precious little information out there about 7up Gold.

Ah, 7Up Gold. That stuff was great. I think it existed for all of three weeks and then disappeared. Had a real nice spicy taste to it. If anyone ever finds a secret cache of it somewhere, be sure to let us know, eh?
posted by 40 Watt at 8:42 AM on June 3, 2002

My bottle for it is also disfigured, and it's a result of the carbonation slowly seeping out.

I don't think so. The plastic bottle is somewhat permeable to CO2; so it makes sense that over time the partial pressure of CO2 dissolved in the soda would equilibrate to the partial atmospheric pressure of CO2. The total pressure in the bottle, however, shouldn't drop below atmospheric pressure due merely to this equilibration: ever if the plastic were selectively permeable to CO2 (not likely, since N2 and O2 molecules are smaller), the pressure difference you see in the buckled bottle should be a driving force for a higher concentration of CO2 in the bottle. The fact that the pressure in the bottle has gone from above 1 atm to below 1 atm is the indication of something other that gas diffusion across the plastic, but I have no idea what it might be.
posted by mr_roboto at 10:33 AM on June 3, 2002

Ski is made by Double-Cola. I grew up on that stuff. You can find it in Southern Indiana, Kentucky, and Tennessee for sure. Ahhh Grippos, Ski, and a Moon Pie... or beef jerky.

I totally forgot about 7-Up Gold. I must be getting old. I enjoy these walks down memory lane too much.

I remember a new cola that I think came out in the early to mid 80's. I cannot remember the name of it, but the ad talked about how the it had a natural taste (less sugary)and was "made with real cola nuts." I think it was targeted to adults. Does any one remember this?
posted by internal at 10:37 AM on June 3, 2002

The bottle is probably buckled because the plastic is also permeable to water. I've seen the same thing with bottles of water (I used to have a bottle of "water joe" on my desk, in case of emergencies; the buckling becomes apparent after just 6 months or so).
posted by djfiander at 10:50 AM on June 3, 2002

What was that about a Moon Pie?
posted by MrMoonPie at 12:24 PM on June 3, 2002

internal, you're thinking of Like Cola (sorry...that link is the only thing I could find. Apparently, it's pretty obscure). I only remember it because of the commercials, and because my beloved grandmother always had crates of the stuff for us to drink, along with Faygo(Warning: incredibly annoying Flash content)...let's hear it for disgusting Midwestern regional drinks!
posted by 40 Watt at 12:43 PM on June 3, 2002

Ah-ha! I take that's another link, this time to a Like Cola TV spot! (Real Audio)

...Although the description of it makes one pause:

Kevin Dobson of 'Knots Landing' takes on a Pac-Man lookalike in this commercial for 7-Up's caffeine-free entry to the cola market.

Wow! Kevin Dobson!!
posted by 40 Watt at 12:47 PM on June 3, 2002

One Google and 2 clicks later... You can buy your Double or Ski Cole and your Moon Pies here (among other yummy things)
posted by Nauip at 2:10 PM on June 3, 2002

Thanks 40 watt!

For some reason I kept thinking of "Mike" as the name. I was only on letter off. Man, my memory is so bad now at 30, I shudder to think what it will be like when I am 60. I will probably forget what I am doing while I...

Anyway, just to keep the Like Cola links going, Like Cola sponsored a bowl game!
posted by internal at 2:36 PM on June 3, 2002

One more clear product: Miller's Clear Beer. I remember seeing it in one of its test markets, but then never again. Never got to taste it, either. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that maybe wasn't a bad thing.

I still have a sealed bottle of OK Cola at home, though. Miserable tasting stuff, but its packaging was utterly cool.
posted by aine42 at 2:43 PM on June 3, 2002

Thanks 40 Watt. My girlfriend and I just had a discussion the other night about Faygo after seeing a new Fanta commercial. Diet Root Beer Faygo will put some hair on your chest.

I thinks it's virtually impossible to attend a family reunion, pitch-in, or 4th of July celebration in the Midwest without someone bringing some Faygo, Big Red, or Ski. The Midwest is the home of second-rate soft drinks.
posted by ttrendel at 3:06 PM on June 3, 2002

Faygo Red Pop is great stuff. So is Rock 'n' Rye, which was vanilla cola years before Coke. Unfortunately, in most of the country you can only get the diet stuff. :-P
posted by geneablogy at 6:50 PM on June 3, 2002

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